Nick Viall & Vanessa Grimaldi - Bachelor 21 - Discussion

Thanks for the link on rings @allykat. I think your taste is like mine, understated elegance. I have one like tessa's not as big I'm sure but it also tells you the "era" when I got engaged. But I think the styles these days are gaudy. Also if the show is paying for it, it will behoove Neil Lane to make them as expensive as he can so in addition to his appearance fee, he can make money if the couple lasts within the time frame required by their contract.

I have had 3 rings over my marriage.
My first was a custom design I loved. About 10 yrs into my marriage the setting/design was damaged beyond repair. I had 2 young children and running around crazed. I ran out to a chain jewelry store and had the diamond re-set into something that was "fine". When we celebrated our 25th anniversary and kids' college tuition was history, I had the stone re-set again into something I love.  I don't think either of my daughters care for it. It's ok they aren't wearing it and I will probably give it to one of my grandsons one day so they can re-set it and hopefully give it to one of their loves. A 38 yr old marriage could be history by then.

Kasha - you are my #ringgoals!

per the people interview https://www.bachandbachettefans.net/t4074p12-nick-viall-vanessa-grimaldi-fan-forum-sm-media-vids-no-discussion

Fascinating Nick seems measured and in his head....
He's so diff from the over the top head over heels in love guy with Andi... IMO
I always imagined him being over the moon and I'm hoping that may come with time

I think he has learned and evolved through the past few years to what is camera/interview/media appropriate.
He was pretty much a party pooper during MEandI's season with the group date stuff and that changed the next season with K and changed again a bit on his own season.
His candid stuff appears less measured and more spontaneous. I guess it depends on the subjective term "over the moon". One man's K-Mart is another man's Nieman's.  This is a guy happy to eat Cheetos. Nothing wrong with that, imo.  He enjoys a good steak, too.

I think he's different because it's real and mutual and he knows where he stands. It's easy to become an emotional wreck when you're in love with an idea and suddenly get left alone with your thoughts and feelings trying to fill in the gaps. This relationship is real and I think there's a certain kind of calm about Nick thanks to it. His future isn't a fantasy anymore and he's reacting accordingly, in a pragmatic clear-headed manner. All JMO.

IMO, he's more measured because he has more to lose. It's easy to be more over the top and emotional when you are the jilted F2 and are chasing an idea. You say things to validate what the relationship was in your mind, justify your feelings/hurt.

IMO, when you are in the relationship you have something to protect and lose. You're not trying to justify anything, your relationship is justification enough. You're trying to protect it.

I think this is most obvious in his response to the Raven question. He had no problem putting Andi on blast for having sex with him, but suddenly he's being more mature and measured in not putting Raven on blast for the not having sex. That shows maturity, but also the difference in having something to justify versus having something to protect.

I also believe that Nick and Vanessa have a good "publicist".  Have you noticed how the couple was able to control the ATFR damage in 24 hours?  I think that's not all Nick and/or Vanessa.  But I agree @allykat and @mindless - he is more careful to protect his new relationship.  In addition, Nick has acquired the finesse and the experience in this SM age to know what to say and when to say it without alienating others.

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Some see measured, I see a guy who just isn't feeling it. I wonder if he enjoys the chasing and producing of the 'process' but now that he has the prize he's like meh. JMO.

allykat wrote:IMO, he's more measured because he has more to lose. It's easy to be more over the top and emotional when you are the jilted F2 and are chasing an idea. You say things to validate what the relationship was in your mind, justify your feelings/hurt.

IMO, when you are in the relationship you have something to protect and lose. You're not trying to justify anything, your relationship is justification enough. You're trying to protect it.

I think this is most obvious in his response to the Raven question. He had no problem putting Andi on blast for having sex with him, but suddenly he's being more mature and measured in not putting Raven on blast for the not having sex. That shows maturity, but also the difference in having something to justify versus having something to protect.

ITA. It's so different when you have something important to lose versus when you've already lost it. IMO it shows Nick's maturity that he realises that. I'm actually really impressed since as much as I like Nick, I was sort of expecting him to be his crazy "throw caution to the wind" self afterwards and instead I see a mature adult who's IMO putting his relationship ahead of showboating.

To be honest, we have never seen him and Andi, or Kaitlyn, outside of the the bubble in the real life. How do we know he would be over the moon happy with Andi irl? Maybe he would be even more subdued and measured? Remember when he first returned from Finland, many said he didn't look happy? Maybe that's just the way he is? IMO.
And I don't know if people have watched most of their interviews. In their People video interviews, I believed they were shot before AFTR, Nick seems pretty happy to me. Especially the "Last thing" video. When he talks about their last date night, Vanessa's last text (Snapchat) to him, his facial expressions...Priceless!
Jmo.