Vanessa Grimaldi - Bachelor 21 - *Sleuthing Spoilers* #3

I don't think I'll ever be her biggest fan ... but I can't stop laughing at this expression


Chasing it with Gatorade doesn't make it a sports drink. by @pacozero

Lara wrote:She reminded me a lot of Kaitlyn on that group date, both with her screaming the answers and facial expressions, and even just her general demeanor which is a bit "look at me!". It's become such a cliche to say at this point, but she really does seem like a combo of Kaitlyn and Andi as she reminded me so much of Andi when she was confronting Nick about Corinne. I wish we got to see a bit more of her; it's really hard to get a good grasp on any of these women's true personalities since we see so little and it feels like I'm just going on gut. I do think she's basically Nick's dream woman, from what we know, but I've always wondered if his type is actually the type of woman he can have a healthy relationship with. Just from hearing his past relationships, I've always gotten the vibe that it isn't, but I'm  looking forward to seeing how that works out. IMO.

I can see what you're describing only time will tell Vanessa's personality cos it's 80% speculation at this point with very little glimpses that we're getting. What's interesting about Nick is that he always had an ideal and he said neither of those women were the right women for him while they each had attributes of his "ideal". And he's always expressed he's looking for this "dream" woman which V fits the mold of -- I'm curious to see how it actually works out between them...

Personally, I wouldn't be surprised if it's the high passion relationship that fizzles for different reasons including -- From her description that she likes a guy who always thinks in "we" terms... I'm not certain V wants the same type of relationship Nick does... I think she's giving me the vibe that she likes the very tight couple that functions as a "we" unit at all times while I'm getting a more independent vibe from nick but only TWT

Another thing I'm picking up is that both of them have an "ideal" in their mind - V tells nick of all the things in Andi's season she loves the fact that he's close with his family. I do think he's close but I don't think he's linked to the hip with them...he very much lives and seems to love the cosmopolitan lifestyle with young-ish friends. I'm curious if she is projecting some of this like V imagining him as a family guy....IMO

notarose wrote:WARNING I'm going to talk about sex.

I'm ready to board the yacht in Bimini and, barring anyone getting seasick, want to see every nuance of their mating ritual.
A lot of time has lapsed since their first date and that newness of learning each other's lips.  Since then, I hazard to say, Vanessa has valued herself enough to not be particularly keen to partake in assembly line advances on GDs. Good on her for knowing her worth.  She has mostly progressed their relationship with talk. The guy can either check out or ask the lady out on a second date if he wants her full attention.  Yes, that's how I see it.  
So.... anticipation builds. I think he will be in for a surprise.  Love the way she palms his solar plexus and gently rocks her bosom to graze his chest as he bites her lip in the gif posted. The woman has game. Note he doesn't have his arms around her...yet.  Love that.  I think he's finally met a woman who's needs & wants he needs to discover rather than expect his usual A-game to automatically put him on the honor roll. IMO Nick is going to have to cram for this exam.
 Love him laying on his side (him still being curious as to what she will permit) but carefully pinning her down with his hands resting on her neck (territorial) as he notes her smile. IMO she is unique to his experience and he may have had a lapse in confidence as to whether, wait for it, she was really that in to him as she says the darnedest things and takes him out of his comfort zone.  Example: she mentions Andy's season then, "surprise", her take away from the last few epis is that she likes how close he is to his family.  Most peeps take away is his question at the ATFR.  When he talks to her after announcing sex with Liz she asks the unexpected, asks if he knew Liz was coming on the show rather than expressing any concern about his having a 1 night quickie. Just 2 in a series of the unexpected way she frames events.
Hmmm, what will she do now that she has him all to herself - aside from that cute bum shot - as the crew flies into the clouds and the yacht becomes a speck on the sea?
She really really likes sweets so he better come prepared.

I want passion damn it

You just made my Friday, thankyou. Bring on the sweets!!! Ita on Vanessa and i soooo love the fact she is no pushover and she WILL have to be impressed and courted if he wants her forever - as anyone who knows their worth wd act.  
There has been a dearth of sweets on this show for weeks so come Monday lets see the SWEETS please.  

I don't think being close to one's family necessarily translates to being attached at the hip. People who are close to and friendly with Nick, when mentioning his great attributes always mention his loyalty to others and his bond with his family. Yes, he likes the cosmopolitan life but he's also the guy who goes home to his family almost every Christmas/Thanksgiving.

When he had his HTD on Andi's season, every one of his siblings (except I think the one who wasn't in the country) were there including his parents. That's a lot of people to coordinate but they all showed up in support. And I follow Nick on social media and I do see someone who is very close to his family.

lleyki wrote:I don't think being close to one's family necessarily translates to being attached at the hip. People who are close to and friendly with Nick, when mentioning his great attributes always mention his loyalty to others and his bond with his family. Yes, he likes the cosmopolitan life but he's also the guy who goes home to his family almost every Christmas/Thanksgiving.

When he had his HTD on Andi's season, every one of his siblings (except I think the one who wasn't in the country) were there including his parents. That's a lot of people to coordinate but they all showed up in support. And I follow Nick on social media and I do see someone who is very close to his family.

 3 years of SM show a warm caring bond between Nick and his family.  

Regarding Vanessa, in her only interview she said she would relocate out of Montreal, that would be something to discuss as a couple.  We know she lived in Ottawa for 4 years to get her degree but beyond that don't know where else she has lived.  On her 1-1 she told Nick that her family wanted her to come so obviously they knew she was going to another country to meet a guy and that there would be a 1 in 30 chance she might end up in a relationship. I imagine they want love in the lives of all their children and where that love takes each of them can sometimes be far away from the nest.
Because Vanessa said her last serious relationship was 3 years ago and that was when she lived in Ottawa it can be speculated that she has already been in love in a place other than "home"

Back to Nick, I think coming into this season an albatross, one of a few, around his neck was whether he was in it for the fame or an relationship. Frontman RS and the tabloids continue to spin that one even at this late a stage in the season. As a Nick fan for 3 years my perspective is when in his first season he said he wanted what his hometown friends had, marriage and a family, that he was like most other guy in his 30s. Having your own family is different than being physically near your parents and siblings so I extend that view to Vanessa as well.  Distsnce doesn't dilute anyone's love for their parents or siblings anymore than living in the same city indicates closeness. It's about quality.

Interestingly, in a beginning-of-season interview Nick was asked how much weight his family's opinion would have in his decision.  He pointed out that at 36 he would make his own decision but of course he would hope everyone would be happy for him. Equally interesting, Vanessa said about family that they are usually right in the end which I take to mean that sometimes she doesn't follow their advice therefore "right in end" means in retrospect.

I would say Nick is very close to his family. Distance prevents him from dropping by for coffee, but as evident from his SM and fan threads, he always attends family functions, weddings, birthdays, etc. His family has always supported him, and what I also admire is they never get involved in the SM antics.

Vanessa must have picked up on that somewhere along the way for her to mention it.

I'm chiming in regarding the longevity of V&N - RS is using statistics to forecast success of couples using the ratio 2 in 21 bachelors has found love and married their (F1/F2) from the season.  So his prediction is there is 10% chance that it will work out for bachelors vs 23% chance if you are the Bachelorette. Or if we add Jojo and Ben then 14% vs. 30% With that said there is low success rate of picking your supposedly spouse from this experiment.

But this makes it fun for all of us because we can use all the factors we want to depict whether a couple will make it or not.  Their personalities, how strong is the attraction, are they friends or just lovers? Will they sizzle or fizzle fast.  I agree with others who are skeptical because this is speed dating show after all and passion do fizzle if they don't have anything in common or can't establish common grounds.  

However, I also think that the high value they as individuals place in family (I presume both of have strong family values), the maturity level not in the way they act but in the way the process conflict (because I believe Vanessa may be perceived childish - she makes faces, has tantrums - which makes her such a great special ed teacher btw), and their ability to negotiate as individuals (acceptance and belief systems) are not traits we can easily see especially with the bits we see on TV.  

I am not going to speculate based on what is shown to me today because there are so much more other factors that can come into play for this relationship to be successful.  For example, the support of their families, the couple knowing what they want in life, meeting exactly at the right time of their lives when they want the same things and their high-degree of commitment to make it work.  

Let's not forget the "us factor" meaning myself who is speculating - whether we are glass half full or glass half empty types.  That also adds to whether we see them succeeding or not. IMO

Loving the visual of Booger Boy adding statistician to his resume.

Kashathediva wrote:Loving the visual of Booger Boy adding statistician to his resume.

My sources say he uses marbles as counters.
They wish to remain anonymous.
But just because RS doesn't show this on his site doesn't mean it isn't true.

the real RS

I don't think Andi and Kaitlyn were "ideal" in Nick's mind ... they had their own qualities and attributes that IMO he liked, but there were other traits that he deliberately or not skipped over. Those "red flags" that were indicating already at the early stage of their relationship how it would end with them ... I was supportive of his relationship with Andi, despite not liking her, but simply because he expressed his enthusiasm for that union, only because she didn't reveal her true self to him ... and that changed the moment she knocked on his door and made him feel "wrong" ... there was the finish line, for me and IMO for him too. To this day I continue to agree with his plane video ... With Kaitlyn on the other hand it was mostly her ability to make things light and fun for him, IMO, I truly believe he saw part of her that he believed to be "lacking", that carelessness, free spirit, ... because despite him being impulsive, he is often wrapped in his head, over-thinking and trying to be fair and just, so he sometimes makes his own life more difficult/complicated (for the risk or challenge, IDK) and with the same "easiness" their "spark" was gone. So, I believe he knows very well why those relationships didn't work out.

Now back to Vanessa ... I don't see any red flags with her. She is impulsive (emotionally charged) just as much as him, but despite their similarities they don't clash ... to explain, I think the career choices are the consequences of someone's character and personality ... so I would guess that she is very organized (him too, if I recall correctly reading it somewhere), disciplined, success-driven and optimistic, creative and imaginative, has empathy for people around her and similar to Nick, she seeks logic, understanding of her surrounding (and people). JMO, why she chose a profession of a teacher. In her ITM/PIs she expressed few thoughts that are similar to Nick's ... about purpose and intent of actions versus the consequences ... about progress and moving forward, learning and understanding each other. In most of her statements I've heard her concern over Nick's line of thinking ... which to me says that she doesn't assume to know him, but rather is willing to comprehend him, also getting to know the basics of his values and priorities ... one of which is also family. She is open with him, I assume from those 4 seconds of CP scene despite not seeing the footage, about the "process" and about her feelings (can be readable on her face) ... so she's open to be judged and for him to decide whether he can "handle" her. She seems to be equally weighting on Nick's words, actions and attitude, and so far despite not agreeing always with him she keeps accepting him, that imperfect man, with all his flaws that by now are more than obvious.

So I see no bubble love, actually I cannot talk about love at this point at all, but I see great curiosity from both, to understand first and foremost the logic of the other ... which IMO that excludes calling it infatuation, more likely it's a beautiful intrigue ... a challenge ... but where both are willing and equal participants. And that is something what Nick never experienced with Andi or Kaitlyn, IMO.

Catdwoman50 wrote:I'm chiming in regarding the longevity of V&N - RS is using statistics to forecast success of couples using the ratio 2 in 21 bachelors has found love and married their (F1/F2) from the season.  So his prediction is there is 10% chance that it will work out for bachelors vs 23% chance if you are the Bachelorette. Or if we add Jojo and Ben then 14% vs. 30% With that said there is low success rate of picking your supposedly spouse from this experiment.

But this makes it fun for all of us because we can use all the factors we want to depict whether a couple will make it or not.  Their personalities, how strong is the attraction, are they friends or just lovers? Will they sizzle or fizzle fast.  I agree with others who are skeptical because this is speed dating show after all and passion do fizzle if they don't have anything in common or can't establish common grounds.  

However, I also think that the high value they as individuals place in family (I presume both of have strong family values), the maturity level not in the way they act but in the way the process conflict (because I believe Vanessa may be perceived childish - she makes faces, has tantrums - which makes her such a great special ed teacher btw), and their ability to negotiate as individuals (acceptance and belief systems) are not traits we can easily see especially with the bits we see on TV.  

I am not going to speculate based on what is shown to me today because there are so much more other factors that can come into play for this relationship to be successful.  For example, the support of their families, the couple knowing what they want in life, meeting exactly at the right time of their lives when they want the same things and their high-degree of commitment to make it work.  

Let's not forget the "us factor" meaning myself who is speculating - whether we are glass half full or glass half empty types.  That also adds to whether we see them succeeding or not. IMO

I believe that individual personalities, family background as in family values and some other environmental factors may affect the fluidity of a marriage relationship...

Presumably, if Vanessa and Nick are both Librans, their personalities are most likely similar...but, their family and environmental backgrounds will give them their individual distinctive qualities...

Having both coming from tightly knitted families, it makes it easier for them to adjust to each other...both are vulnerable, passionate and emotionally charged or driven...I actually find Vanessa funnier (goofy), I guess that's great because it makes living life more fun for both of them...

What I love about Nick and Vanessa's relationship is the way they communicate with each other...I guess the credit goes all the way to Vanessa's tactful and great questioning skills, and second to that would be Nick's transparency...I love that Vanessa could handle and tone down Nick's impulsive behaviours...and, make him a better person...I take Vanessa as more compassionate, more sensitive, more down-to-earth..it is a great influence for Nick to adapt while living and working in the entertainment industries...Vanessa herself has previously work as an actress, thus she understands the worldly environment showbiz entails...Vanessa can be a little bit old fashion in dating values. I think Nick greatly values and respects her for that...that's probably one of the character traits Nick has been attracted to...pushing for her self-worth and demanding respect from the opposite sex...regardless Vanessa probably is not too old fashion to the point wherein she cannot cater to Nick's sexual passion...their love and attractions to each other most specially on different levels (physical to spiritual) will play as major factors on how their relationship would stick and break during the process...soul mates relationship can be harder to sustain initially due to more intensive feelings and more invested interests involvements between the two parties... but, in the long run it would be so worth it because of the forever/infinite/unconditional love/ultimate happiness concepts that are attached to it--after tons of hard works and constant open communications, I believe, everything would workout since both of them have already reached their stage of maturity and are ready to start a family together...