Bachelorette 10 - Andi Dorfman - Episode 10 - MTP-LCD-FRC- July 28/14 *Spoilers & Sleuthing* #2 - Discussion

sbolduc wrote:One last thing I wanted to add, I have no problem with Andi or any women for that matter sleeping with multiple men, I do not think less of a women or man for that matter, that is their own perogative.

I do have an issue when you do that with someone knowing how much it means to them and you are not feeling the same about the act, but project that you are feeling the same.

So yes, Andi, you are a grown woman and you are right you can do whatever you want to do, its your body. I absolutely hate what people are calling you because you don't deserve that, you don't deserve to be called a s*ut, thats not what you are. You are just lacking some understanding and empathy if you did know what that meant to Nick, it not meaning the same, and did it anyway.

bleuberry wrote:

vivi2 wrote:

Acrunch wrote:Ironcat, I just want to say that I completely agree with you on every point you've made on the subject.  The fact that she chose Josh and is engaged to him should have given Nick all the answers he needed.  What is the mystery here?  Sex or no sex, in the end, just as she said, her relationship with Josh was more and he was the one she wanted to pursue a future with.  IMO, Nick's problem is that his ego was bruised.  Anything other than Andi becoming a puddle in his presence and changing her mind would have ended the same...with Nick spilling their private business on air and trying to embarrass Andi and Josh.  I don't for a second believe he was as "shocked" as everybody that it just "slipped out" and that he didn't deliberately do that.  The smile, the smirk while being interviewd on the subject removed the last bit of doubt I may have had.   And if Andi was cold and her demeanor bothered him, maybe it's because of HIS behavior since she made her choice...behavior that included insulting Josh and having no respect for the fact that she is engaged.

I agree.  I just watched ATFR again, IMO, he was VERY calculated-- shakiness, tears..etc. to get sympathy first then...OOPS !!!! , I think he's a very good actor, and what he did was for revenge, pure and simple. Nick is not a gentleman IMO.

Sly he is. And hoping they can get to a point where they can be friends (or whatever) Lol ummm, bye Nick.

ironcat wrote:
Considering the perfect storm that resulted, I have to wonder how much the producers worked behind the scenes to manipulate the situation so that something like this would happen.  It wouldn't surprise me if they storyboarded this once they saw how things were going.

sbolduc wrote:One last thing I wanted to add, I have no problem with Andi or any women for that matter sleeping with multiple men, I do not think less of a women or man for that matter, that is their own perogative.

I do have an issue when you do that with someone knowing how much it means to them and you are not feeling the same about the act, but project that you are feeling the same.

So yes, Andi, you are a grown woman and you are right you can do whatever you want to do, its your body. I absolutely hate what people are calling you because you don't deserve that, you don't deserve to be called a s*ut, thats not what you are. You are just lacking some understanding and empathy if you did know what that meant to Nick, it not meaning the same, and did it anyway.

ironcat wrote:

sbolduc wrote:One last thing I wanted to add, I have no problem with Andi or any women for that matter sleeping with multiple men, I do not think less of a women or man for that matter, that is their own perogative.

I do have an issue when you do that with someone knowing how much it means to them and you are not feeling the same about the act, but project that you are feeling the same.

So yes, Andi, you are a grown woman and you are right you can do whatever you want to do, its your body. I absolutely hate what people are calling you because you don't deserve that, you don't deserve to be called a s*ut, thats not what you are. You are just lacking some understanding and empathy if you did know what that meant to Nick, it not meaning the same, and did it anyway.

Since we weren't privy to the conversation Nick and Andi supposedly had about his views on sex and what it means to him, we have no way of knowing exactly how aware she was of how much he was misinterpreting her actions.

ironcat wrote:

sbolduc wrote:One last thing I wanted to add, I have no problem with Andi or any women for that matter sleeping with multiple men, I do not think less of a women or man for that matter, that is their own perogative.

I do have an issue when you do that with someone knowing how much it means to them and you are not feeling the same about the act, but project that you are feeling the same.

So yes, Andi, you are a grown woman and you are right you can do whatever you want to do, its your body. I absolutely hate what people are calling you because you don't deserve that, you don't deserve to be called a s*ut, thats not what you are. You are just lacking some understanding and empathy if you did know what that meant to Nick, it not meaning the same, and did it anyway.

Since we weren't privy to the conversation Nick and Andi supposedly had about his views on sex and what it means to him, we have no way of knowing exactly how aware she was of how much he was misinterpreting her actions.

sbolduc wrote:One last thing I wanted to add, I have no problem with Andi or any women for that matter sleeping with multiple men, I do not think less of a women or man for that matter, that is their own perogative.

I do have an issue when you do that with someone knowing how much it means to them and you are not feeling the same about the act, but project that you are feeling the same.

So yes, Andi, you are a grown woman and you are right you can do whatever you want to do, its your body. I absolutely hate what people are calling you because you don't deserve that, you don't deserve to be called a s*ut, thats not what you are. You are just lacking some understanding and empathy if you did know what that meant to Nick, it not meaning the same, and did it anyway.

ironcat wrote:What exactly would have provided closure for Nick?  Andi told him that her feelings for Josh were stronger.  He wanted to hear that she loved him and she didn't.  

ironcat wrote:

whit90 wrote:

ironcat wrote:From my personal experience in the recruiting business, and to quote Jack Nicholson, people "can't handle the truth", and when they are told anything critical or uncomplimentary about themselves as the reason for their rejection, they don't take it well and usually try to counter/defend themselves.  This is why the famous "It's not you, it's me" excuse was invented.  I agree that Andi should have said when she dumped Nick that she was in love with Josh, but I have a suspicion that the producers don't want the lead to say that before the FRC.  But my impression of Nick is that wouldn't have been enough and he would have argued with her.  And like I said before, considering the structure of this show, how could he not have just inferred from the circumstances that she must prefer Josh to him if she is sending him home?  Also, from the note he wrote, it appears that knowing that she was in love and engaged to Josh didn't stop him from making another "pitch" to her, trying to get her to change her mind (by questioning her judgment and implying she was a coward, no less).

What I do not understand is why the JODi fans just can not be happy for their couple instead of bashing Nick every chance they can. He has moved on and is doing well he has been nothing than a gentleman on all the interviews he has done. People have changed their mind about him and see him as a very sincere man.  He wanted closure and he got that with the help of Andi's cold heart.

I really don't think my post is "bashing" him, certainly not compared to some of the stuff I've read about Andi and her alleged personality disorder here, some of it I imagine from Nick fans.  Is that the rule that only the "winner" is allowed to be insulted?   

eirekay wrote:

stuckinsc wrote:

ironcat wrote:What exactly would have provided closure for Nick?  Andi told him that her feelings for Josh were stronger.  He wanted to hear that she loved him and she didn't.  

She did this after he asked the heated question not before.  In my opinion, had she simply told him that she cared for him, but she loved Josh more, it would have helped a lot.  She should have tried this before he asked the question and she might not have been asked the question.

I think that if Andi had told Nick the morning of the FRC that what they had was real but in her heart she knew that she had deeper feelings for Josh, that would have helped.  Instead she went in with what was wrong with their relationship and that, IMO, leaves the door open for "maybe I can fix those things" as opposed to "She loves someone else".  

Andi has said that she thought that Nick would understand how powerful her relationship with Josh was as he watched the episodes and that he would find his closure that way but I think Nick watched the episode play out and just saw more confirmation that she was giving him all the right signs and it wasn't just in his head.

I think we are awfully hard on these three people and we forget that they are lab rats in a social experiment run by TPTB whose sole goal is to test how to get the most drama out of them.  When it fails, we complain that the season was boring and when it succeeds, we rail at the participants rather than the Lab Masters.

stuckinsc wrote:

ironcat wrote:

whit90 wrote:

What I do not understand is why the JODi fans just can not be happy for their couple instead of bashing Nick every chance they can. He has moved on and is doing well he has been nothing than a gentleman on all the interviews he has done. People have changed their mind about him and see him as a very sincere man.  He wanted closure and he got that with the help of Andi's cold heart.

I really don't think my post is "bashing" him, certainly not compared to some of the stuff I've read about Andi and her alleged personality disorder here, some of it I imagine from Nick fans.  Is that the rule that only the "winner" is allowed to be insulted?   

It isn't okay to call her a slut, and it shouldn't be okay to call him a stalker.

She could learn empathy and Nick should learn to not let that slip or to say something like that.  Neither one of them was innocent in this.  Maybe we can all ease up on our opinions and realize that none of these people are perfect, just like us.

soccermom333 wrote:

kdubs_ca wrote:

pbmax wrote:


In the real world they have names for people like that. In the real world they talk about people like that so people are talking about her.

Yes she can't choose but one so don't have sex with anyone until you make your decision.

The producers was behind this whole thing starting at the MTA, why CH told Josh lied on the lie detector test, they're really trying to help them make it. So its not Nick stalking but tptb drama antics.

The fact that in 2014 they "have names for people like that" who happen to be women, but the same is not said of the man in your avatar who treated his sexual encounters far more cavalierly is incredibly sad to me.  

This is the post of the day!!!    So hypocritical.... Juan Pablo comes to mind. Sad.