Bachelorette 10 - Andi Dorfman - Episode 10 - MTP-LCD-FRC- July 28/14 *Spoilers & Sleuthing* #2 - Discussion

Scarletta wrote:Andi didn't owe it to him to baby him or feed his ego.  He owed it to her to leave her alone.  Her decision had been made.  He owed it to her to respect that.

MiaHawk wrote:

happygolucky wrote:I post it here also - from fan thread:

Without wanting to talk about Andi, I do have an issue I would like to vent myself:

I believe we can LOVE A PERSON, once we get to know them, we can love who they are, we can love their spirit, we can love their presence, we can love their company, their character and attitude, we can love them ... and show our love by RESPECTING them.

That has nothing to do with BEING IN-LOVE.

That respect, that love is present among us, is present among the friends, between the coworkers and most evidently between the family members, where the boundaries of sexual relationship are set by the ethic and morality of the society.

I believe Nick, despite his question that probably wasn't the smartest choice for a television broadcast, maintained the level of respect for Andi. Even with that comment which he had difficulty to compose, because he was questioning his own sanity and own foolishness and asked for nothing but truth to calm his inner turmoil. He needed equally respectful answer for his own closure. And in my opinion, he didn't get it.

So I have no problem with Nick exposing what should be a private matter, since HIS whole relationship wasn't private at all. We've witnessed it.
I guess Andi hasn't, don't know if that means she wasn't present in it or wasn't feeling it.

  

MiaHawk wrote:

Scarletta wrote:Andi didn't owe it to him to baby him or feed his ego.  He owed it to her to leave her alone.  Her decision had been made.  He owed it to her to respect that.

Respect is something that you earn.  I don't think Andi earned that merit badge when she used Nick to scratch her itch in the FS.

Scarletta wrote:Bull Pucky! Words like that mean nothing after the fact. He's just trying to do his own damage control.
Rewatch the clip. Watch his face. He knew exactly what he was doing.

sbolduc wrote:Ughh I feel so crappy about last night for everyone. IMO Andi was extremely cold to Nick, when he was an absolute wreck. She completely downplayed any special relationship they had, it wasn't until he said what he said that she owned up that her feelings in the moment were real.

I don't like that Nick said what he said on TV, but I can sympathize as to why he did. If you watch the flow of conversation, I believe he was fighting it the whole time and he said it to prove that what he was thinking wasn't made up.

I truly feel the reason he wanted to reach out to her was to have this conversation privately, one of the first things he said to her in the DR when she let him go was "I think you took it too far" and "I wish you didn't do some of the things you did". I don't think he regrets what he said to her I think he regrets that he said it on TV, however what other option did he have. He said to her "you knew how much THAT meant to me" (that being making love). That is why I think he was upset. It wasn't that she picked Josh, it was that she wouldn't acknowledge any type of love towards him yet did something with him that he felt he had communicated to her meant a lot to him. To him she gave him a level of intimacy that he felt was meant for a "fiance" not for someone who she was going to dump in 10 days.

I can't bash Andi for her response to what he said, I actually think she handled it well. I think she needs to work on being more compassionate to others who are in a vulnerable state, to not always prove how strong and feisty she is. I think Nick needs to learn to gather his thoughts before he speaks and to learn to be more tactful in what he says. I hope they both learnt a lot about themselves last night and grow from it.

Last night was great proof that these two were not right for each other. This revelation IMO should not impact whether Josh and Andi will make it. If it is as strong as they are saying it is, then Josh already knew what happened between Andi and Nick. If he didn't well that isn't Nick's fault at all.

eirekay wrote:

Scarletta wrote:Bull Pucky!  Words like that mean nothing after the fact.  He's just trying to do his own damage control.
Rewatch the clip.  Watch his face.  He knew exactly what he was doing.

I'm sorry but I don't mind read so I don't know what someone else is thinking.  I very much like my rose colored glasses and I still would prefer to think that Nick's disclosure was a slip made out of hurt and pain.

I wish only the best for all three of them.  I hope they each find their bliss and joy. AND I HOPE NO LONG TERM HARM COMES FROM ENTERTAINING US ON A TV SHOW!

soccermom333 wrote:Josh and Andi are a strong couple, madly in love.  Will they last, time will tell.   Of course Josh already knew... and clearly he is okay with everything.  They won't be the last couple to go through this on the show and certainly were not the first.   Their body language and chemistry is still off the charts.  

Nick had every right to state his feelings, share is concerns and ask questions.  Should he have done it on national TV, well that is the million dollar question and up for debate.  However, Andi and Josh have every right to respond anyway THEY want.  

I bet Nick has already moved on, as Josh and Andi have and their paths will NOT cross again.  No love lost between them and thats okay.  IMO, it is sad that things could not have ended differently between them.  It is what it is.  

 

sdmom wrote:

sbolduc wrote:Ughh I feel so crappy about last night for everyone. IMO Andi was extremely cold to Nick, when he was an absolute wreck. She completely downplayed any special relationship they had, it wasn't until he said what he said that she owned up that her feelings in the moment were real.

I don't like that Nick said what he said on TV, but I can sympathize as to why he did. If you watch the flow of conversation, I believe he was fighting it the whole time and he said it to prove that what he was thinking wasn't made up.

I truly feel the reason he wanted to reach out to her was to have this conversation privately, one of the first things he said to her in the DR when she let him go was "I think you took it too far" and "I wish you didn't do some of the things you did". I don't think he regrets what he said to her I think he regrets that he said it on TV, however what other option did he have. He said to her "you knew how much THAT meant to me" (that being making love). That is why I think he was upset. It wasn't that she picked Josh, it was that she wouldn't acknowledge any type of love towards him yet did something with him that he felt he had communicated to her meant a lot to him. To him she gave him a level of intimacy that he felt was meant for a "fiance" not for someone who she was going to dump in 10 days.

I can't bash Andi for her response to what he said, I actually think she handled it well. I think she needs to work on being more compassionate to others who are in a vulnerable state, to not always prove how strong and feisty she is. I think Nick needs to learn to gather his thoughts before he speaks and to learn to be more tactful in what he says. I hope they both learnt a lot about themselves last night and grow from it.

Last night was great proof that these two were not right for each other. This revelation IMO should not impact whether Josh and Andi will make it. If it is as strong as they are saying it is, then Josh already knew what happened between Andi and Nick. If he didn't well that isn't Nick's fault at all.

Did you read Nick's interview? He said he was caught off guard how cold she was.

Di_ATL wrote:

MiaHawk wrote:

Scarletta wrote:Andi didn't owe it to him to baby him or feed his ego.  He owed it to her to leave her alone.  Her decision had been made.  He owed it to her to respect that.

Respect is something that you earn.  I don't think Andi earned that merit badge when she used Nick to scratch her itch in the FS.

IT takes two to tango, so he was willing to scratch that itch for her. He could have said NO and not played along with it stating he would only do so once they were engaged and he knew he was the final one. Nicky played the game too.  

ironcat wrote:Her FS date with Josh was after she had already slept with Nick. Maybe she really WAS disappointed in his"pastry", is it? :-)

Reid didn't pursue Jillian after knowing she was ENGAGED. Unlike Nick.

MiaHawk wrote:

Di_ATL wrote:

MiaHawk wrote:


Respect is something that you earn.  I don't think Andi earned that merit badge when she used Nick to scratch her itch in the FS.

IT takes two to tango, so he was willing to scratch that itch for her. He could have said NO and not played along with it stating he would only do so once they were engaged and he knew he was the final one. Nicky played the game too.  

Nick fell in love with her and falsely believed that she fell in love with him.  He made a mistake in judgment blinded by love.  He made love.  She had sex.  She stated she was never in love with him and claimed she never told him those words.  Maybe not verbally, but she used the international full body sign language symbol of it.  She should have just packed more batteries in her suitcase.  Then nobody's feelings would have gotten hurt.  Jmho

PS too bad Nick couldn't have read my previous post on Why People Have Sex that I wrote weeks ago.  Nick definitely had reason 1.  Not sure if Andi's reason was on the list.  Oh wait, somebody here added a 4th reason...string along the F2 so he believes he is F1....yep.