Re: Nick Viall - Bachelorette 10 - Discussion - Thread #6

[Guest]

Sean's (at the time) controversial decision to wait until he married is looking better and better to me.

Sex or no sex I'm sure Sean can appreciate whatever happened in the FS should stay private.  I'm sure Sean would not be to happy if Lindsay or Ashlee  talked about 'their version" of how things went down.  Both ladies could have said that although no sex, Sean gave them signals that they were going to be the F1,    I'm a little disappointed in Sean for even entertaining this w. Nick.

Well, Sean faced Ashlee on MTA and she claimed that he led her on in Fantasy Suite. Sean was a gentleman and said that he was sorry if she thought that way, but did not agree with her.  

Sean's religious beliefs were certainly mocked by everyone yet he stayed true to himself. I see Nick doing the same and applaud Sean for giving him a platform.  

I see Nick staying true to himself, but I don't think he sees how lucky he was to having a lead who IMO was concerned about his feelings. She didn't let him pick out a ring and being rejected at the very proposal. She let him go early. As every other runner up he didn't see that coming and that is the beast of this show. The Bachelorette is under contract and can't talk about who she is going to pick days or weeks ahead and she is supposed to bring two guys as far as to a proposal. The leads have to get TPTB to agree to let someone go early. A year from now I hope Nick will see that Andi let him go out of respect for him.

[Ash2214]

Unless Andi flat out told him he was F1, he didn't know for sure. And if he felt soooo strongly about the significance and sacredness of the act, it was reckless to take a chance his instincts were wrong.

You touch on a valid point. This was something that happened in private between (AFAIK) two consenting adults. TWO - not just one - had to take part in that decision, and neither could have known what would happen; there were 2 other guys Andi was dating and she wasn't in an exclusive relationship with anyone.

I find it continually hilarious the use of the word "private" when this is a reality TV dating show. Incongruous.

And I find it hilarious that people can't understand that two people having sex in a private suite with no one else around is indeed private. Why do you think each year the fantasy suite is so prominent? Because it's the first time the lead and a contestant can be in private. If Nick didn't say they had sex, no one would know for sure if they did have sex or not. If he didn't say anything, it would have remained private. Simple as that.

[ironcat]

I agree too. It suits Nick to play up the sensitive man with the old fashioned values role. Sean's more believable IMO.:-)

[Catdwoman50]

Nick had a golden opportunity in front of millions of TV viewers to show Andi and the world that he didn't behave badly. And used it how? To behave badly. And he's still at it. Are we going to be faced with 6 more months of Nick explaining to the world that what he said on national TV was all Andi's fault? I fear we may ...

IMO Nick needs professional help to get past his experiences with this show. He doesn't seem to be able to let it go and the more he tries to explain himself the worse it gets. Why on earth does he feel the need to make a guest post on Sean's blog with the headline "Why I brought up the fantasy suit"?  Is he trying to stay in the limelight or what is the matter with him???
He knew that there were three guys left, when the FD took place. He was first. If "making love" is such a big deal as he states in his blog post, why didn't he say "NO, I want to wait until you are sure it's gonna be me in the end". Instead he writes "To me, sex between us was a big deal, and she knew it. That’s why I feel Andi’s decision to have sex with me was not appropriate." I cringe when I read his blogpost and  :pullouthair:  Once again he blames Andi for what happened. Andi was in a process where she tried to figure out her different relationships.

Nick said he watched previous seasons before going on the show, so he was familiar with the format. Why did he think it would be different this time? There has always been two guys in the end and the one who isn't the chosen one has always felt blindsided, but all of them have been able to move on, everyone but Nick.
He went on a show traveling the world for two months. During that period of time he met Andi for about 30-40 hours, and fell so deeply in love that 3 months post show he can't let go. To me it seems like no one is helping the poor guy to heal.
Why didn´t anyone stop him from doing that extra filming for ATFR? He needed a therapist not an extra segment of him stalking Andi and talking bad about her choice. Sean letting Nick post on his blog is not helping him either. Every time Nick tries to justify what he said, the hole he's in, gets deeper and deeper. Of course he gets some support from people reading his post, but IMO there will be more people thinking negative thoughts about him. It's time to seek professional help instead of airing his laundry to the public. JMHO

Per the bolded: Do we know that Nick solicited Sean to put this on his blog--was Yawn tied up in a closet somewhere and forced to stay there until Nick was allowed to voice himself?
This is doubtfully the case.
I got the distinct impression that Nick was asked by Sean/Yawn--or even invited to share his thoughts.
I know this is very objectionable to some. To me it is a meaningful discussion and one I have been enjoying. After years of boredom and waiting for the next jump from this franchise, I am delighted to see something intelligent and sensitive being discussed.  
I hope the parties involved learned something.

I'm totally a SeanCat fan but the one benefitting from all the blog traffic is Sean he gets paid for the traffic he generates. So unless Nick is taking a cut, I think sean solicited Nick. He may reach out to Chris as well, I think he is asking all of the maybe nextTB candidates. IMO

[Kashathediva]

You touch on a valid point. This was something that happened in private between (AFAIK) two consenting adults. TWO - not just one - had to take part in that decision, and neither could have known what would happen; there were 2 other guys Andi was dating and she wasn't in an exclusive relationship with anyone.

I find it continually hilarious the use of the word "private" when this is a reality TV dating show. Incongruous.

And I find it hilarious that people can't understand that two people having sex in a private suite with no one else around is indeed private. Why do you think each year the fantasy suite is so prominent? Because it's the first time the lead and a contestant can be in private. If Nick didn't say they had sex, no one would know for sure if they did have sex or not. If he didn't say anything, it would have remained private. Simple as that.

To me, the idea of being in the FS is almost as private as the idea of the wedding night and thinking the couple is not going to be intimate.
Maybe they are, maybe they aren't.
But either way, both scenarios are the butt of a lot of jokes and assumptions. Granted--no one is in the honeymoon suite to know exactly what is or is not going down--just like the FS, but people snicker and giggle and make jokes anyway.
Initially, the first season, the hopes were the FS was going to be an all out frenzy. CH went as far as to stock the room with edible body paints for Alex and Amanda. It wasn't until seasons later that the mikes and cameras did leave the couple/room for privacy.

[stuckinsc]

Yeah Cari every since we have been introduce to Nick his perception of everything from Josh temper and Josh being a doormat to Andi and that Andi changed her mind at the last moment has been touted as the holy grail all season. Now this .

Just me personally, but I was a fan of both Nick and Josh. I don't think all the things that Nick said about Josh had to be true. I honestly thought the video was fake, but since it was real, those words were the words of a broken hearted man after being dumped. I have said before, I am sure I have said much worse, just as loud about my exes and their new people.

Some of us are capable of liking both and seeing that each of their opinions are just that. The truth usually lies somewhere in the middle.

[Catdwoman50]

Then I hope you don't do anything to upset him afterwards because goodness only knows how he would vent his feelings - letters, stalking, telling everyone you cruelly took advantage of his gentle loving nature...

I'd make sure we were on the same page first for one thing.

  :bigsmile:  

Waiting in the hallway with some of you ladies.

[Catdwoman50]

I have to agree that if making love was something so sacred to Nick, and understanding the format of the show, he should have just refused Andi's offer.  Wonder why he didn't.:-)

Because he thought he was F1!!!!!!!!!!!

How could he think that when he was still having serious doubts up until the last day?  He clearly stated in his PI that he was not going to propose until he knew how she felt and that Josh was out of the picture.

So when did Andi lie? When she said, I never loved you to Nick? When she said to Josh you were always the one? Or when she said she was conflicted until FS in one of her interviews? It's just confusing to some of us who can't excuse her anymore.

[Ash2214]

I find it continually hilarious the use of the word "private" when this is a reality TV dating show. Incongruous.

And I find it hilarious that people can't understand that two people having sex in a private suite with no one else around is indeed private. Why do you think each year the fantasy suite is so prominent? Because it's the first time the lead and a contestant can be in private. If Nick didn't say they had sex, no one would know for sure if they did have sex or not. If he didn't say anything, it would have remained private. Simple as that.

To me, the idea of being in the FS is almost as private as the idea of the wedding night and thinking the couple is not going to be intimate.
Maybe they are, maybe they aren't.
But either way, both scenarios are the butt of a lot of jokes and assumptions.  Granted--no one is in the honeymoon suite to know exactly what is or is not going down--just like the FS, but people snicker and giggle and make jokes anyway.
Initially, the first season, the hopes were the FS was going to be an all out frenzy. CH went as far as to stock the room with edible body paints for Alex and Amanda. It wasn't until seasons later that the mikes and cameras did leave the couple/room for privacy.

I completely understand that the whole idea of the fantasy suite can be a bit humorous and that also, things that happened in there can be leaked out, but regardless, Andi and Nick had sex in private. No one watched them. The act was done just between the two of them and it was private and unfortunately it was made public.

[Catdwoman50]

I assume AshLee didn't try to get in touch with Sean for 2months after hoping he'd pull a Mesnick though.

No it was understood she was third down the totem pole. Not the same.

[Ash2214]

Because he thought he was F1!!!!!!!!!!!

How could he think that when he was still having serious doubts up until the last day?  He clearly stated in his PI that he was not going to propose until he knew how she felt and that Josh was out of the picture.

So when did Andi lie? When she said, I never loved you to Nick? When she said to Josh you were always the one? Or when she said she was conflicted until FS in one of her interviews? It's just confusing to some of us who can't excuse her anymore.

What's confusing about it? She explained her words. She knew from the moment she met Josh there was something there, but she was scared and worried that it was too good to be true. She said she knew for certain it was Josh after the FS. In another interview she said looking back on the feeling she had for him the moment he stepped out of the limo was essentially like love at first sight or knowing he would be the one, but she was just too blind or scared to allow her to feel that and she didn't come to terms with those feelings until the FS. According to her and Nick too, Andi never said she loved Nick.

[Ash2214]

I assume AshLee didn't try to get in touch with Sean for 2months after hoping he'd pull a Mesnick though.

No it was understood she was third down the totem pole.  Not the same.

Lindsay sure as heck didn't get any sort of closure, especially as he was breaking up with her. No matter what people thought he meant, Sean told her he loved her. She didn't try to get in touch with him after the show.

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