Re: The Final One (F1) - Bachelorette 9 - Spoilers - Thread #4

[Aunties_Love]

Brooks isn't just being wishy washy. He isn't just trying to figure things out. 

BROOKS QUITS.

He dumps Des.

He isn't being refreshing either, he does quit.

Aunties_Love - why don't you wait to see what actually happens. We don't know.  

I guess I am being singled out here even though all I did was agree to the post above mine..hmmmm. ok, got it. But we do have sc's proving that he did break her heart and is in a vehicle with red eyes leaving.

[CHO]

I continue to worry that Brooks needs re-enforcement from family - and Des has been on her own - thinks independently - is able to know what she feels - know that it is different from other relationships - is what she wants etc. I can see that major editing could have been done to create doubt and drama - we see this all the time. But she really seems to have fun with Chris - and he seems to know that what he sees in Des is what he is happy with - no doubts. So as it is presented now - I don't really want to see Brooks come back and beg. I want Des to be confident that the guy she chooses is in love with her - and willing to stick by her no matter what. It is interesting that Chris does not seem to have any doubts about who else is in the picture - ie Drew or Brooks. Should be an interesting last two episodes !

[Ariela]

Brooks isn't just being wishy washy. He isn't just trying to figure things out. 

BROOKS QUITS.

He dumps Des.

He isn't being refreshing either, he does quit.

Aunties_Love - why don't you wait to see what actually happens. We don't know.  

He is refreshing to those who see and appreciate what a unique, real, genuine and thoughtful approach he's taking to this - thinking about the realities of a relationship after the show and if it will work - not trying to stay on tv longer, become the next Bach or just get engaged for the heck of it to be the winner and then realize soon after that maybe he should have thought it through a little more.  

Could not be more refreshing to me and the most real reaction to being on this show I've seen.  I know some agree and some don't, just responding to the definitive nature of that statement above.  It's up for debate.

Great positive spin on his lack of thinking BEFORE he went on the show. I like all the f3's but I don't have rose-colored glasses on. The relationships coming out of this show are very fragile as it is, so the smallest doubt while being wined, dined , and confined on this show will be magnified in the real world. It's just a matter of time-tick-tock.
What did he expect? he just wanted a few minutes on TV and visit exotic places for free?
No wonder he felt more comfortable on group dates. When he got the 1 on 1 cloud date, he was sweating it at the dinner table when Des was "running", and he was crawling  or whatever.

Eh, even if he comes back and proposes, the process will be tainted, IMO.
So far, Des has been honest with the guys she's eliminated. We'll have to see how it plays out.

Thee only way I could see a proposal from Brooks as legitimate (99%) is if his family talk is perhaps about fear of rejection by Des(he saw how Zak got cut and didn't expect it. He can't even claim that because he could have ASKED Des how she feels during the FS when the cameras are gone ), but if it's anything lame like just plain ole' cold feet, viewers won't be as sympathetic as you. Only diehard fans will think like you. I mean all this time he'd been witnessing guys on the show either leaving (Bryden) or being let go because they weren't there for the right reasons, and here he is F3-1, and he's analyzing. Shoulda thought about the engagement possibility BEFORE he went on the show. That's what happens on this show.

[Aunties_Love]

Brooks isn't just being wishy washy. He isn't just trying to figure things out. 

BROOKS QUITS.

He dumps Des.

He isn't being refreshing either, he does quit.

Aunties_Love - why don't you wait to see what actually happens. We don't know.  

He is refreshing to those who see and appreciate what a unique, real, genuine and thoughtful approach he's taking to this - thinking about the realities of a relationship after the show and if it will work - not trying to stay on tv longer, become the next Bach or just get engaged for the heck of it to be the winner and then realize soon after that maybe he should have thought it through a little more.  

Could not be more refreshing to me and the most real reaction to being on this show I've seen.  I know some agree and some don't, just responding to the definitive nature of that statement above.  It's up for debate.

Do we really know what approach he's taking to the show? It seems like it's speculation to explain him leaving. I have no issue with that but it's beginning to be taken as the truth. We won't really know until we see what happens & what's said but even then it's only what they decide to show us.  Hopefully this interpretation turns out to be right for Des' sake. I don't care for Brooks just leaving at this point and then changing his mind but will wait to see how it plays out.

And if others are speculating differently on the sc's we do have and are shown other than Brooks is being refreshing, or isn't leaving, then we are being negative. I am sorry, guess I just don't understand that. I agree, I do have a problem with him putting Des through all that to just whip around and change his mind and expect to or want to come back. Something about that scenario right now with the caps/storyline/edit we do have as well as the other "leaked" or storylines that we have been given from mags just don't add up. That is all I have said, I believe.

[Ariela]

I continue to worry that Brooks needs re-enforcement from family - and Des has been on her own - thinks independently - is able to know what she feels - know that it is different from other relationships - is what she wants etc.  I can see that major editing could have been done to create doubt and drama - we see this all the time.  But she really seems to have fun with Chris - and he seems to know that what he sees in Des is what he is happy with - no doubts.  So as it is presented now - I don't really want to see Brooks come back and beg.  I want Des to be confident that the guy she chooses is in love with her - and willing to stick by her no matter what.  It is interesting that Chris does not seem to have any doubts about who else is in the picture - ie Drew or Brooks.  Should be an interesting last two episodes !

His family CANNOT tell him what/how he feels INSIDE. Only he knows that. His family can tell him that Des is  nice girl, they make a nice couple, but NOBODY can tell you if your in love or not. Love, infatuation....who knows?

[Nativenewyorker]

Brooks isn't just being wishy washy. He isn't just trying to figure things out. 

BROOKS QUITS.

He dumps Des.

He isn't being refreshing either, he does quit.

Aunties_Love - why don't you wait to see what actually happens. We don't know.  

He is refreshing to those who see and appreciate what a unique, real, genuine and thoughtful approach he's taking to this - thinking about the realities of a relationship after the show and if it will work - not trying to stay on tv longer, become the next Bach or just get engaged for the heck of it to be the winner and then realize soon after that maybe he should have thought it through a little more.  

Could not be more refreshing to me and the most real reaction to being on this show I've seen.  I know some agree and some don't, just responding to the definitive nature of that statement above.  It's up for debate.

Do we really know what approach he's taking to the show? It seems like it's speculation to explain him leaving. I have no issue with that but it's beginning to be taken as the truth. We won't really know until we see what happens & what's said but even then it's only what they decide to show us.  Hopefully this interpretation turns out to be right for Des' sake. I don't care for Brooks just leaving at this point and then changing his mind but will wait to see how it plays out.

albean,

Once again the voice of reason. Thanks so much for pointing this out. I don't know why anyone would try to reach conclusions considering how incredibly scripted this show has always been. I appreciate that you said his supposed approach may be pure speculation to explain why he leaves. We don't know the truth yet, and even when we see it all play out we still won't know how real it will all be. They can show us whatever they choose to show us. Whatever they need to fit their particular storyline.

I have real concerns about Brooks not being as into Des as she is into him. I am also concerned about him bailing this late in the season. I really do hope that he is sincere in his struggle to come to terms with his feelings about Des. Given how much she seems to have fallen for him, it could turn out to extremely painful for her.

I am taking a wait and see attitude for now.

[Nativenewyorker]

It's going to be the most dramatic ever and I can't wait!  Especially for ATFR when they are happily together and all of the negative Brook haters will have absolutely nothing to say.

Are you talking about here because I haven't seen any Brooks "haters"? Being doubtful about someone's intentions or actions doesn't make one a hater imo. I actually don't dislike Brooks at all & what I've seen is that most of us like all of the f3. Now if you want all positive stuff, LoveMe made some nice fan threads. That's where I lived at the end of Sean's season.  :Nod:

I agree.  I haven't seen any Brooks "haters", but yes, there is not all positive and roses posts either.  You are right albean, the positive and love posts will be in the fan threads if that is what someone is looking for.

Auntie,

I am grateful that you and albean responded to the original comment. The word "haters" is quite strong and should not be thrown around carelessly.  I see people questioning Brooks regarding his behavior, his doubts and not feeling as much for Des as she does for him. We would have to be blind not to see it and at least wonder what's going on with him.  It's not all lollipops and roses and sunshine here, but for the most part I think people have been simply asking honest questions and trying to figure out what is going on with Brooks. I think there are certainly enough people here who are his fans and have stood up for him. They have had their say. So should others who may have serious doubts about his behavior.  That doesn't make him a bad person.  We all know with this show that TPTB can manipulate behind the scenes and influence contestants when it comes to how they behave. I think the F4 are all really good guys. Des got rid of the ones who where there for the wrong reasons and the ones for whom she just did not feel it. So she did a good job.  

I agree that if one only wants to read praise and positivity about their particular favorite, then the fan threads are a great place. I spend some time there  myself!  

[Aunties_Love]

Brooks isn't just being wishy washy. He isn't just trying to figure things out. 

BROOKS QUITS.

He dumps Des.

He isn't being refreshing either, he does quit.

Aunties_Love - why don't you wait to see what actually happens. We don't know.  

He is refreshing to those who see and appreciate what a unique, real, genuine and thoughtful approach he's taking to this - thinking about the realities of a relationship after the show and if it will work - not trying to stay on tv longer, become the next Bach or just get engaged for the heck of it to be the winner and then realize soon after that maybe he should have thought it through a little more.  

Could not be more refreshing to me and the most real reaction to being on this show I've seen.  I know some agree and some don't, just responding to the definitive nature of that statement above.  It's up for debate.

Do we really know what approach he's taking to the show? It seems like it's speculation to explain him leaving. I have no issue with that but it's beginning to be taken as the truth. We won't really know until we see what happens & what's said but even then it's only what they decide to show us.  Hopefully this interpretation turns out to be right for Des' sake. I don't care for Brooks just leaving at this point and then changing his mind but will wait to see how it plays out.

I agree it's a guessed opinion which ever way one sees it.  I also think he probably has major abandonment issues stemming from his dad (see his tearing up at even talking about it) and that likely affects him, a major fear of rejection maybe?  

I don't like the idea of him leaving and changing his mind either and almost don't even want to watch this week.  I'm trying to hold onto positive feelings that it will play out in a way that leaves Des with a happy ending, which is what I most would love.  For me that only happens when she ends up with Brooks, because watching the grapevine preview it just reinforces to me how different she is Brooks vs Chris and Drew - love vs really likes to me.

The part of him having abandonment issues, if that is the case, why in the world would he do to Des what has been done to him. IMO, that makes no sense. He abandoned Des through this process and that is the part that I am having problems with. If he knows what it's like to be left, then why do it to someone you like/love? There has to be more to all of this than just that. The problem has to go deeper meaning a past girlfriend coming back, problems at home, something other than him having doubts.

[SueSt]

I continue to worry that Brooks needs re-enforcement from family - and Des has been on her own - thinks independently - is able to know what she feels - know that it is different from other relationships - is what she wants etc.  I can see that major editing could have been done to create doubt and drama - we see this all the time.  But she really seems to have fun with Chris - and he seems to know that what he sees in Des is what he is happy with - no doubts.  So as it is presented now - I don't really want to see Brooks come back and beg.  I want Des to be confident that the guy she chooses is in love with her - and willing to stick by her no matter what.  It is interesting that Chris does not seem to have any doubts about who else is in the picture - ie Drew or Brooks.  Should be an interesting last two episodes !

All three guys went home to get approval from their families about moving forward with Des. In the circumstances, that would seem to be appropriate. But if Brooks lingers or returns for more discussion with his family and/or shares his hesitancy with Des, I agree that it does not bode well for his/Des' future. Any person considering a life-time marriage committment should know within themselves whether it's the right move or not. Any hestiation, any questions, best to walk away. Chris AND Drew both seem to know what they want and make Des happy (in different ways). Both have told Des that they are confident of a future with her and either would make a better partner for Des than Brooks... should she also feel that Chris/Drew is the one for her! Agree, should be an interesting last two episodes!!

[nutty1]

I would guess that all 4 guys spoke with their families after Des left. I am sure all of it was filmed. And I'd bet that is exactly what they are going to show us, wanting us to think that he went back home after the RC.

[Nativenewyorker]

Brooks isn't just being wishy washy. He isn't just trying to figure things out. 

BROOKS QUITS.

He dumps Des.

He isn't being refreshing either, he does quit.

Aunties_Love - why don't you wait to see what actually happens. We don't know.  

He is refreshing to those who see and appreciate what a unique, real, genuine and thoughtful approach he's taking to this - thinking about the realities of a relationship after the show and if it will work - not trying to stay on tv longer, become the next Bach or just get engaged for the heck of it to be the winner and then realize soon after that maybe he should have thought it through a little more.  

Could not be more refreshing to me and the most real reaction to being on this show I've seen.  I know some agree and some don't, just responding to the definitive nature of that statement above.  It's up for debate.

Do we really know what approach he's taking to the show? It seems like it's speculation to explain him leaving. I have no issue with that but it's beginning to be taken as the truth. We won't really know until we see what happens & what's said but even then it's only what they decide to show us.  Hopefully this interpretation turns out to be right for Des' sake. I don't care for Brooks just leaving at this point and then changing his mind but will wait to see how it plays out.

I agree it's a guessed opinion which ever way one sees it.  I also think he probably has major abandonment issues stemming from his dad (see his tearing up at even talking about it) and that likely affects him, a major fear of rejection maybe?  

I don't like the idea of him leaving and changing his mind either and almost don't even want to watch this week.  I'm trying to hold onto positive feelings that it will play out in a way that leaves Des with a happy ending, which is what I most would love.  For me that only happens when she ends up with Brooks, because watching the grapevine preview it just reinforces to me how different she is Brooks vs Chris and Drew - love vs really likes to me.

The part of him having abandonment issues, if that is the case, why in the world would he do to Des what has been done to him.  IMO, that makes no sense.  He abandoned Des through this process and that is the part that I am having problems with.  If he knows what it's like to be left, then why do it to someone you like/love?  There has to be more to all of this than just that.  The problem has to go deeper meaning a past girlfriend coming back, problems at home, something other than him having doubts.

I agree about the abandonment issues. The other thing I wanted to point out is that Drew didn't exactly have a charmed childhood either. He had to deal with an alcoholic father and anyone who has lived with this knows the toll it can take on a child. An alcoholic cannot be there emotionally for their children because they are in the throes of their own addiction. Then there is the issue of having a severely mentally challenged child. It appears that the family has managed to deal with all of this and come out on the other side happier and closer. But I don't think it was easy getting there. Drew did say when he brought Des home to meet his family that this was the first time his father was at his mother's house. That kind of got lost, but it says a lot. I have to believe that it has a lot to do with his alcoholism, which destroys families.

I also agree that if it's about Brooks being abandoned, then the very last thing he would want to do to Des is to leave her. He knows how it felt. So why do to someone what was done to you? I simply don't get it and don't buy it.

I don't presume to know what prompts this, but it has to be something other than that. You don't visit your own heartache on someone else.

[SueSt]

Brooks isn't just being wishy washy. He isn't just trying to figure things out. 

BROOKS QUITS.

He dumps Des.

He isn't being refreshing either, he does quit.

Aunties_Love - why don't you wait to see what actually happens. We don't know.  

He is refreshing to those who see and appreciate what a unique, real, genuine and thoughtful approach he's taking to this - thinking about the realities of a relationship after the show and if it will work - not trying to stay on tv longer, become the next Bach or just get engaged for the heck of it to be the winner and then realize soon after that maybe he should have thought it through a little more.  

Could not be more refreshing to me and the most real reaction to being on this show I've seen.  I know some agree and some don't, just responding to the definitive nature of that statement above.  It's up for debate.

Do we really know what approach he's taking to the show? It seems like it's speculation to explain him leaving. I have no issue with that but it's beginning to be taken as the truth. We won't really know until we see what happens & what's said but even then it's only what they decide to show us.  Hopefully this interpretation turns out to be right for Des' sake. I don't care for Brooks just leaving at this point and then changing his mind but will wait to see how it plays out.

I agree it's a guessed opinion which ever way one sees it.  I also think he probably has major abandonment issues stemming from his dad (see his tearing up at even talking about it) and that likely affects him, a major fear of rejection maybe?  

I don't like the idea of him leaving and changing his mind either and almost don't even want to watch this week.  I'm trying to hold onto positive feelings that it will play out in a way that leaves Des with a happy ending, which is what I most would love.  For me that only happens when she ends up with Brooks, because watching the grapevine preview it just reinforces to me how different she is Brooks vs Chris and Drew - love vs really likes to me.

The part of him having abandonment issues, if that is the case, why in the world would he do to Des what has been done to him.  IMO, that makes no sense.  He abandoned Des through this process and that is the part that I am having problems with.  If he knows what it's like to be left, then why do it to someone you like/love?  There has to be more to all of this than just that.  The problem has to go deeper meaning a past girlfriend coming back, problems at home, something other than him having doubts.

Very interesting, Aunties. I think it was LoveDovez that also brought Brook's abandonment issues up in another thread a day or so ago... and I thought it was (and is again!) extremely insightful. Brooks may not be as aware as we are that these issues are at play... so he's repeating history because that's all he knows and does not know how to resolve it in a positive way, since it was not resolved for him in a positive way... so it actually make a LOT of sense to me that Brooks would abandon Des... Will he feel bad - yes. Will he feel out of control - yes. Will he have the awareness to tie his actions back to his dad - ???? that remains to be seem... But for sure, his reaction we have seen leads me to believe that whether he can verbally tie his feelings back to his dad... they are certainly at play.

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