Ben Higgins - Lauren Bushnell - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #2

Linds911 wrote:In regards to both their families bonding, yes that's nice to see but they aren't the first couple to do that. Sean/Catherine and Kaitlyn/Shawn's have all recently for special events and of course all the other couples at one point. Just don't see how they are "perfect couple" in that regards. IMO.

I think it's wonderful Kaitlyn/Shawn and Sean/Catherine have gotten family support. SeanCat are married, and Boothstowe are doing them for over a year now, so I think it's a great sign that BenLo also have such great support. It speaks highly for all 3 relationships, and I'm sure it helps all 3 thrive and survive. IMO.

I don't see Ben and Lauren as "the perfect couple" at all. They are just two individuals that I find appealing, both together and separately that I like to root for. They are people. They have flaws and shortcomings like everyone. In fact, I hardly ever see fans characterizing either as perfect. More often than not, when I see the "perfect" label it's from non fans trying to knock them off some imaginary pedestal that I frankly don't think exists.

They may not be the perfect couple to us but to each other they are perfect and that is what matters most.

I am a huge supporter of SAHM, I think it is an incredibly hard job to do. And if and when Lauren becomes a stay at home mom, I would never call that not working. Unless there is a magical child I have not read about Lauren is not a mom, so the SAHM comparison is not applicable to me.

I have said before I criticized both MeAndi and Kaitlyn for not working, so I will be consistent in the fact that I don't see Lauren working either. She has done a couple publicity appearances for Alaska, not much else that we see. I could be wrong that she is hard at work behind the scenes, but we neither see or hear about it. Maybe the show will demonstrate that I will be happy to admit I was wrong.

Right now she herself has answered in interviews for the new show that career wise she is focused on thinking about fashion blogging or interior decorating, her words, not mine. So to me that is not working.

I don't care if she moved from LA to Denver three months ago. I have moved multiple times to be with my husband and not to places that would be my first choice to live, in one case it was giving up a city with friends I loved and what was a dream job and a wonderful opportunity to finish my PhD at a top twenty medical school to go back to a place I had lived in previously and hated living in. I put on my big girl panties and got a job and found volunteer work in the community that mattered to me, all in my first three months, so sorry, I don't give Lauren a pass on the difficulty of moving to a place where she already had a friend and having the luxury of working out all the time, taking selfies in her fashion efforts, focusing on decorating a house and criticizing Ben for posting the wrong picture of her. That is a great and easy life IMO.

I want more from her. I want to see her do something out of interest for herself, not just following on Ben's coattails. She has an amazing opportunity to use her platform for something if she wants to. She doesn't. Doesn't make her bad, it makes her boring to me. And yes, I do think someone who seems to have no interest in working or doing stuff to help anyone else with all her free time that she has not working seems entitled to me. I think holding tight until she convinced Ben to do their own show is the equivalent of others making money off SM schilling, good for them all, but really not any better than what others have done.

As I have also stated repeatedly, Ben loves Lauren, so my opinion has no effect on her at all and certainly I don't think that the fact that I am not inspired by what I see as a boring slightly vapid mid 20s female not doing much to capitalize on the opportunities put in front of her makes me a fellow woman hater. I have done plenty to work and support my fellow women over the years. so I actually resent the idea that not being supportive of Lauren means any of us are harsh on our fellow woman or tear other women down to make ourselves feel better. JMO.

stuckinsc wrote:
I want more from her. I want to see her do something out of interest for herself, not just following on Ben's coattails.  She has an amazing opportunity to use her platform for something if she wants to. She doesn't.  Doesn't make her bad, it makes her boring to me.  And yes, I do think someone who seems to have no interest in working or doing stuff to help anyone else with all her free time that she has not working seems entitled to me. I think holding tight until she convinced Ben to do their own show is the equivalent of others making money off SM schilling, good for them all, but really not any better than what others have done.

Snipped. Unless I missed something, I haven't seen any indication that the reality show was all Lauren's doing and she's forcing this idea down Ben's throat. I think that's a pretty broad assumption, and I'm not sure where that opinion is coming from. I'm guessing the reality show was a joint decision, based on what they think is best for them right now, whether the decision works for them in the long run or not. Maybe one person was more for it than another, who knows, we don't know. But they mutually came to a decision as a couple together, and seeing their track record, probably involved family in that decision as well.

sosleepy wrote:

stuckinsc wrote:
I want more from her. I want to see her do something out of interest for herself, not just following on Ben's coattails.  She has an amazing opportunity to use her platform for something if she wants to. She doesn't.  Doesn't make her bad, it makes her boring to me.  And yes, I do think someone who seems to have no interest in working or doing stuff to help anyone else with all her free time that she has not working seems entitled to me. I think holding tight until she convinced Ben to do their own show is the equivalent of others making money off SM schilling, good for them all, but really not any better than what others have done.

Snipped. Unless I missed something, I haven't seen any indication that the reality show was all Lauren's doing and she's forcing this idea down Ben's throat. I think that's a pretty broad assumption, and I'm not sure where that opinion is coming from. I'm guessing the reality show was a joint decision, based on what they think is best for them right now, whether the decision works for them in the long run or not. Maybe one person was more for it than another, who knows, we don't know. But they mutually came to a decision as a couple together, and seeing their track record, probably involved family in that decision as well.  

It's only been a few months since they have been public and the first thing she is doing is to change her life completely to help Ben and her have a strong relationship. She is doing what she needs to, do to give them a strong foundation. I think behind the scenes she has been pretty busy. Also I think she has been paid for some of their appearances and possibly made more money from that than as a flight attendant. That is not an extremely high paid job. It would have been difficult for Alaskan Airlines and her at first to be working on a plane. Also for her and Ben to grow their relationship they need to be together. She made the sacrifice to move. So I give her some grace in making this transition pretty well. I seems like they are supporting themselves and I think she is doing fine. Also good for her to go after her dreams for a job. Isn't that what living in the USA is all about, going after your dreams? Also this reality show is Ben's third show. I think he is all on board with this. He is more outgoing. I think that his show will be harder for Lauren. I think that she might of had to be convinced to do it. I do think they are trying to make decisions together however.

Eviebloom wrote:

sosleepy wrote:

stuckinsc wrote:
I want more from her. I want to see her do something out of interest for herself, not just following on Ben's coattails.  She has an amazing opportunity to use her platform for something if she wants to. She doesn't.  Doesn't make her bad, it makes her boring to me.  And yes, I do think someone who seems to have no interest in working or doing stuff to help anyone else with all her free time that she has not working seems entitled to me. I think holding tight until she convinced Ben to do their own show is the equivalent of others making money off SM schilling, good for them all, but really not any better than what others have done.

Snipped. Unless I missed something, I haven't seen any indication that the reality show was all Lauren's doing and she's forcing this idea down Ben's throat. I think that's a pretty broad assumption, and I'm not sure where that opinion is coming from. I'm guessing the reality show was a joint decision, based on what they think is best for them right now, whether the decision works for them in the long run or not. Maybe one person was more for it than another, who knows, we don't know. But they mutually came to a decision as a couple together, and seeing their track record, probably involved family in that decision as well.  

It's only been a few months since they have been public and the first thing she is doing is to change her life completely to help Ben and her have a strong relationship.  She is doing what she needs to, do to give them a strong foundation.  I think behind the scenes she has been pretty busy.  Also I think she has been paid for some of their appearances and possibly made more money from that than as a flight attendant.  That is not an extremely high paid job.  It would have been difficult for Alaskan Airlines and her at first to be working on a plane.  Also for her and Ben to grow their relationship they need to be together.  She made the sacrifice to move.  So I give her some grace in making this transition pretty well.  I seems like they are supporting themselves and I think she is doing fine.  Also good for her to go after her dreams for a job.  Isn't that what living in the USA is all about, going after your dreams?  Also this reality show is Ben's third show.  I think he is all on board with this.  He is more outgoing.  I think that his show will be harder for Lauren.  I think that she might of had to be convinced to do it.  I do think they are trying to make decisions together however.

I may have incorrectly assumed. My assumption is based on the fact that Ben looked pretty miserable during almost the complete airing of the bachelor, he definitely perked up once the show was over and he was able to be in public, but I remember multiple posts of why did Ben not look happier during the airing of the show and they were not from me.

From this interview, http://variety.com/2016/tv/news/bachelor-spinoff-ben-higgins-lauren-bushnell-reality-wedding-politics-1201802526/

Congratulations on getting your own show. How did it come about?

Ben: Right after “The Bachelor” season aired, we really wanted to take time for ourselves, for our family, for our friends. And that happened. Then, we quickly realized that there are so many fans that want to be in our lives, that are involved in our lives, that ask us a thousand questions. Our lives are still documented because Lauren won’t stop Snapchatting me at all hours of the day.

At that point, we realized that our relationship was at a place and our lives were at a place where we could invite people into it again.

For us, we were open to the idea [of a show], and [Freeform] came to us with a desire to document it. So we realized that, as we talked it through, that it was something we could do.

I interpreted this answer to mean that Ben was pretty happy not sharing as much of their lives and it was Lauren who desired to do that, so he would go along with the show as well since she was already putting him on snapchat more than he wanted. I am sure he is mostly joking, but this sounds a bit annoyed to me. I hope I included in the whole post that it was all JMO, just as it being a joint decision that consulted the families is others opinion unless we have proof either way and this answer to me skews it being something that she is more into sharing their lives than he is, but he is happy to go along with her. JMO.

In one of the numerous interviews Ben and Lauren gave after the announcement of their show....Ben indicated that the offer of the show for them was made shortly after the Bachelor wrapped and they chose not to pursue it at that time because they wanted to take time for each other and get settled in RL...but as they reached the merge completion...they both realized that going back to anonymity was not reality. Where ever they went in public people were always interested in them and their lives. Therefore Ben and Lauren together decided they were at a solid and settled point in their lives together...so they revisited the idea/offer of the show and chose to move forward with it. One thing that is very clear is Ben and Lauren are a team. A partnership of equals.   JMO

I read/heard that same interview and came away with the same impression as you, Seabear. Thanks for the recap.

I don't think it is all that hard for a flight attendant to relocate to a new city, they fly all the times and they need much less adjustments than other people, such as they don't have the job issue to worry about. Not to mention, after relocation, Lauren doesn't have to work at all! She just needs be there then people would praise her for "giving up a lot" for Ben, so why not?

Until maybe later when she really is raising a family quietly in Denver, I'll change my opinion about this girl. So far, she is still the surface level princess wanna be who happened to be picked.

All my opinion.

Seabear wrote:In one of the numerous interviews Ben and Lauren gave after the announcement of their show....Ben indicated that the offer of the show for them was made shortly after the Bachelor wrapped and they chose not to pursue it at that time because they wanted to take time for each other and get settled in RL...but as they reached the merge completion...they both realized that going back to anonymity was not reality. Where ever they went in public people were always interested in them and their lives. Therefore Ben and Lauren together decided they were at a solid and settled point in their lives together...so they revisited the idea/offer of the show and chose to move forward with it. One thing that is very clear is Ben and Lauren are a team. A partnership of equals.   JMO

I completely agree.

IMO Ben's quotes are not meant to be taken literally, he has quite sarcastic sense of humour, and throws things out there with tongue in cheek. He also has done already 2 reality shows on his own, so in no way IMO is he opposed to document his private life in public in yet another reality show. Especially if it pays well and brings attention to the causes that are important to him and Lauren.

I'm guessing filming for their show will start soon, it actually might have already started, and I'm interested to see it all happen.

She can't exactly do her job as a flight attendant when everyone on the plane is asking her for selfies so yea, that is a pretty big adjustment to me. She had to give up a constant in her life and is now starting over and figuring out which direction she should go. **edited**It's not going to stop her from living her life the way she wants, chasing the dreams she wants to chase, and snuggling up to a fiancé that many women wish they could have though. **edited**

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