Re: Ben Higgins - Lauren Bushnell - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #2

by SarahD Sun Jul 03, 2016 1:30 pm

For me, I got what both Ben and Lauren are about during their first date. When they had their first conversation about what is life like for the two of them, I was hooked line and sinker. They may be boring or bland to some but for me they are both incredibly beautiful people but have such simple and down to earth take on life.

I don't see the comparison of Lauren with both Kaitlyn and Andi because she is nothing like those people. I never liked either of Kaitlyn and Andi (two of the worst ettes) because they are very shallow but with Lauren I see simplicity and grace.

by Guest Sun Jul 03, 2016 1:33 pm

Lennoxcolinrolland wrote:As long as the show isn't like that awful Jonas Brothers reality show, I'm down! Boy was that bad....
IMO.

Lol ita! I watched I Heart Nick Carter and Nick and Vanessa Lachey which culminated with their weddings. I liked it. I am on the fence about BenLo's show but will watch as it too will or might culminate into their wedding.

by nannymargie Sun Jul 03, 2016 1:37 pm

sosleepy wrote:
soccermom333 wrote:^^^^SeekAny I give you props for trying but the thing is people are here and have their favorites and some like lauren and Ben and some don't. It makes the board more exciting. I could try and go in the Sean and kait thread, and believe me "some" have tried, and state my case to convince the non-fans why they should "like" Kait and Shawn. I would be wasting my time. LOL

It is what it is here. We all have our favorites. Some couples just resonate more with some and not with others. You should see us in the BBJ and Jojo fan thread!

Anyway, just don't take it personally that there are some who don't like Lauren and Ben. I have learned this lesson a long time ago. I have fan-girled many a couple and believe me they were not always "popular." :cutesmile!:

I agree with a lot of this post, in that everyone has different taste, and different couples/people resonate differently with everyone. And that's cool. What amazing times we live in that we have SEVEN different couples together, with a side of Janner and all the new couples coming out of BIP! Something for everyone, pick your flavor. But in regards to the bolded, it's a discussion thread, not a negative thread. I appreciate people bringing forth stuff you might typically just find in the fan thread to actually discuss. What @SeekAny brought over is a good representation and example of what this couple is really about, IMO. One thing that Lauren really gives to Ben, is a big family and siblings. How wonderful for only child Ben to have 2 brothers and a sister, loving in laws. Ben's parents also seem wonderful and have invited the entire Bushnell clan over for the weekend. It must make them very happy to know Ben is marrying into such a close knit family, with lots of siblings. He's an only child and parents don't live forever, and God willing, kids outlive their parents. Parents think about that kind of thing, the family their children will have when they are gone. I bet they have some level of peace that Ben appears to be so taken in and accepted by such a great family.

And in regards to Lauren Bushnell acting entitled, sorry, I personally just don't see that at all. I see a kind hearted, happy person, who cares greatly for her siblings, her God child, her family, animals, amongst other things. I see someone who uprooted her life only 3 months ago, who had a huge life change, and is currently adjusting and figuring out a new normal. I see someone who has always maintained a level of gratitude for her blessed life, finding Ben, and the opportunities that have been given to her. I see someone who hasn't even taken many sponsored adds, and isn't making an income the easy way out like most from this show. I see someone I'm willing to give more time, to see what she becomes.

I don't think Ben acts entitled at all, I think he seems like a pretty great individual. He's with Lauren, he lives with her, he loves her, he is currently spending the weekend with her entire family (minus her sister). I don't think he'd be so enamouroured with such a supposed entitled, egotistical individual. And if he is, then that makes him the same way. Sometimes it bothers me all the girl on girl hate. Lauren gets 10x the critism as Ben. Not fair. Not right. Usually you are who you love. And I think these two are incredibly similar in a lot of core, fundamental ways.

I totally agree with your post. *edit* She had to adjust to a new place and friends and I think she did it very well. She has been by Ben's side doing various charity events. She also has been redoing things in Ben's house to make it their own. IMO I don't think she feels entitled to anything because she is putting in a lot of time and effort when doing this. Why does she have to have a job/career to be worthy. If all she does is be by Ben's side and supports him and makes him happy I think she deserves credit for that.

by SarahD Sun Jul 03, 2016 1:42 pm

Entitled is not a description I'd ever see in both Ben and Lauren who are incredibly kind, good hearted and simple.

Entitled is reserved for BBJ as noted by James Taylor.

by veg_out Sun Jul 03, 2016 1:43 pm

I've lost most interest in Benlo like I do most couples from the franchise after the shine wears off--I don't relate to them like I do Chres and Jash though I see the reason that many do.

They are young and in the early part of forging their, hopefully, lifelong relationship.

I do hope that this opportunity allows both of them to decide their next steps and achieve the future that they see for themselves, independently and jointly. PINKHEART

by sosleepy Sun Jul 03, 2016 1:56 pm

I get the feeling (and I could be wrong), but Lauren's mom was a SAHM. To me, based on her mother's social media posting, she is a very kind, loving, supportive person. I've really been impressed with her lovely posts about her husband and children. They are heartwarming. Mama Bushnell has one HUGE accomplishment in raising 4 seemingly lovely individuals, all who remain incredibly close and caring to this day. I think Lauren learned from the best. She seems a lot like her mom; the way she seems to care for her younger siblings like they are her own, the way she seems to gravitate towards all animals, kind and gentle, these are all lovely attributes. If all she ever does is become a nurturer (and jury is still out, it's still waaaaay too early to see for sure how her path will go), if all she doe is raise her and Ben's children right, care and provide for Ben, give him the constant love and support he needs and craves, well, that's a life well lived. It's nothing to be ashamed of. And it's hard work and quite selfless, too.

by Cocoasneeze Sun Jul 03, 2016 1:59 pm

I don't get where Lauren gets the 'entitled' tag attached to her. I've seen nothing to suggest that. She's said in many interviews, that she feels undeserving of these opportunities she gets, because she has no real talent. Every fan picture posted on sm (that I've seen) says that she's absolutely the kindest and sweetest. Also, IMO, an entitled person wouldn't uproot her whole life to move across the country for her fiancé, and humbly build a new, strong friendship circle to herself so easily.

I absolutely adore how family oriented Ben and Lauren are, and how their families are bonding together because of Ben/Lauren. The Higgins invited the Bushnells to their home for a week when Ben and Lauren became public, and that didn't turn the families against each other, it happened again for this holiday. That's so amazing to me.

by sosleepy Sun Jul 03, 2016 2:00 pm

veg_out wrote:I've lost most interest in Benlo like I do most couples from the franchise after the shine wears off--I don't relate to them like I do Chres and Jash though I see the reason that many do.

They are young and in the early part of forging their, hopefully, lifelong relationship.

I do hope that this opportunity allows both of them to decide their next steps and achieve the future that they see for themselves, independently and jointly.

Veg, I always love when you post. You seem like such a kind person and always looking for the best in everyone. Even when you disagree or don't like something, you say so in such a diplomatic way and so kind! Haha. I need to try to emulate you more. Smiley

Sorry, off topic.

by SeekAny Sun Jul 03, 2016 2:04 pm

sosleepy wrote:I get the feeling (and I could be wrong), but Lauren's mom was a SAHM. To me, based on her mother's social media posting, she is a very kind, loving, supportive person. I've really been impressed with her lovely posts about her husband and children. They are heartwarming. Mama Bushnell has one HUGE accomplishment in raising 4 seemingly lovely individuals, all who remain incredibly close and caring to this day. I think Lauren learned from the best. She seems a lot like her mom; the way she seems to care for her younger siblings like they are her own, the way she seems to gravitate towards all animals, kind and gentle, these are all lovely attributes. If all she ever does is become a nurturer (and jury is still out, it's still waaaaay too early to see for sure how her path will go), if all she doe is raise her and Ben's children right, care and provide for Ben, give him the constant love and support he needs and craves, well, that's a life well lived. It's nothing to be ashamed of. And it's hard work and quite selfless, too.

Great post sosleepy! That's what I was getting at. She doesn't have to have a major career to have lived a well life. I don't see her being lazy in the future, I see her being a very active mom, wife, friend with interests on the side and contributing to the community she surrounds herself in.

The reason I brought that picture over earlier was to show the other side of this story, we're here focusing on her career and yet she's focused on that and so much more right now.

by veg_out Sun Jul 03, 2016 2:07 pm

^sleepy, I see the same in you. PINKHEART

Trust me: Several years ago I had strong feelings of dislike towards one of the guys on Maynard's season and even her choices. Sometimes, I'm not the biggest fan of Lauren and Ben's dynamic. Life experiences and the greater cruelty of the world that we're living in, however, has made me appreciate the kindness of other people.

There are many, many kind hearts on this board, so I'm grateful to have returned during Ben's season to be with this community. PINKHEART

Back to the Benlo love! blowkiss

by Guest Sun Jul 03, 2016 2:46 pm

Some of you have raised an interesting point by bringing up SAHM vs COHM (career outside home mom - I just made that one up.) I'm kinda surprised we women are still polarized on the topic. We have such freedom now to choose our own paths and the options are astonishing when you consider where we were only 50 years ago. I consider the SAHM and COHM as equally valuable and the reality is that a majority of women will do both in their lifetimes, and with today's technology she will often do both at the same time. When a woman is a SAHM, her services to society are as great as any job a COHM will perform, even more-so if her power over the next generation's contribution is recognized. Oh dear, clearly this is my hot button issue.

Back on topic - Lauren's in a transitional phase and is finding how to mold her life around the man she loves. That may not be a popular choice, but every couple has to decide for themselves what their priorities will be. If Ben had moved to her town because Lauren couldn't / wouldn't do her career elsewhere, would that have been different? I haven't necessarily been a fan of the couple, but like many of you, post-show they seem perfectly normal and loving.

by Kashathediva Sun Jul 03, 2016 2:51 pm

Loved your post BKay.
I know I did both.
There was definitely one I loved much more--much much more than the other. That was me.

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