The Bachelor 20 - Ben Higgins - Episode 9 - Discussion - *Sleuthing - Spoilers*

I think the two ILYs are for Lauren and Jojo. I think both are sincere and I'm not surprised if it did happen... because it easily can.
When you date two people at the same time, it's really possible to form two kinds of love with each of them. Sometimes when in a date, you get lost in the moment, you enter DATE HIGH. When the person is enjoying in a date, he doesn't realize that his head is in the clouds. He is happy in the moment, but when he wakes up the next day, that's when reality sinks in. Two things: either what he felt last night was only fleeting happiness or he wakes up thinking about the other person and continue to feel stronger feelings for her.
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I'd like to believe that Jojo's date came first before Lauren's. Because Ben in their turtle date was a little jaded. I sense strong feelings of guilt in Ben just looking at him on their date. Yes, he looked happy, but it's like he's trying to cover up for guilt and anxious feelings. Guilt that what happened with his date with Jojo was against what he has always wanted Lauren to feel. I go back to what Ben asked Lauren in Warsaw, "Are you more confident now?". And Lauren said, "Yes, 100%". If Ben was aware and concerned of this and I'm pretty sure he was because he remembers clearly all his discussions with Lauren (even his nerves on their first meeting), I think he would feel bad that he became disloyal to Lauren. I'm not saying that Ben did not have a right to fall in love with two women. But knowing Ben's personality, he did not expect himself to actually fall in love with two. And IMO he felt guilty as hell knowing that Lauren has trusted in him 100%.

It will be interesting to see how will deal with this and will live with this if he did pick Lauren. Lauren will forgive because she understands the process, but that doesn't mean she won't be a tad bit hurt.  I am excited to see how Ben will take action to clear himself up.

IMO based on a lot of seasons of watching and listening to leads and contestants talk, the lead is not supposed to say "I love you" or "I'm in love with you" to anyone but the F1 and then not until the FRC. IIRC we've heard leads say they have waited so long to say that. They may (and often do) say I'm falling in love with you or I could see myself falling in love with you - that seems fair. Although I do know of at least one lead (Ashley) who said ILY to F1 (JP) on camera (but they partially obscured it so few actually realized what was said).

Now if this is actually true, how did the show not flip out when Ben said it the first time to whoever was the first girl he said it? In other words, the notion that Ben said it not once but twice to two different girls before the producers took him behind the wood pile and called him out for saying it doesn't pass the smell test, IMO.

What seems more likely, to me, is that after Ben said ILY to the first girl (likely Lauren) they decided the best way to get to the end with some sort of mystique was to have him say it to someone else so they could still have a plausible suspenseful ending.
JMHO

I have now multiple reasons to watch . The new one being , how does one dig themself out of this abyss? ( dramatically speaking )
Ben's got some splaining to do for sure. No wonder you can hear in an older promo as Ben walks on the wall in Bahamas , as the storm churns up the sea, I'm not running , after he explains he was convicted . Oops I mean conflicted . Sad really, but it will make for one heck of a dramatic ending for sure! This HAS to be Jojo's golden ticket as the new Bette.

ForeverLove wrote:I have now multiple reasons to watch . The new one being , how does one dig themself out of this abyss? ( dramatically speaking )
Ben's got some splaining to do for sure. No wonder you can hear in an older promo as Ben walks on the wall in Bahamas , as the storm churns up the sea, I'm not running , after he explains he was convicted . Oops I mean conflicted . Sad really, but it will make for one heck of a dramatic ending for sure! This HAS to be Jojo's golden ticket as the new Bette.

I'm still perplexed why they have JoJo as F2 because that would seem, if conventional wisdom is applied, a much more difficult spot to cast the next lead from. Maybe they felt that with Chad wanting JoJo back, she would end up going back and thus can't be the next lead anyway. I don't know.

I do think that sending Caila home early was Ben's wishes that they let him do and I think he did it for Lauren. It makes the next RC has two roses and two girls rather than put Lauren through a two rose three girls RC.

Just to add my 2 cents...
It's been established that the lead is not supposed to tell any contestant that they love them before FRC, so can you imagine how confident JoJo must have felt. How could she have guessed that he would say that to two girls?? I just think he needed to think about how certain he was making BOTH Lauren and JoJo feel by telling them ILY (if those are the two women).

Ben could of been Dreaming that he said I love you to two .

IMO he was definitely drunk during his ILY in the new preview (sounds like it was to JoJo)

I felt more sincerity in "in love with with you as well" JMO

Lucas15 wrote:

ForeverLove wrote:I have now multiple reasons to watch . The new one being , how does one dig themself out of this abyss? ( dramatically speaking )
Ben's got some splaining to do for sure. No wonder you can hear in an older promo as Ben walks on the wall in Bahamas , as the storm churns up the sea, I'm not running , after he explains he was convicted . Oops I mean conflicted . Sad really, but it will make for one heck of a dramatic ending for sure! This HAS to be Jojo's golden ticket as the new Bette.

I'm still perplexed why they have JoJo as F2 because that would seem, if conventional wisdom is applied, a much more difficult spot to cast the next lead from. Maybe they felt that with Chad wanting JoJo back, she would end up going back and thus can't be the next lead anyway. I don't know.

I do think that sending Caila home early was Ben's wishes that they let him do and I think he did it for Lauren. It makes the next RC has two roses and two girls rather than put Lauren through a two rose three girls RC.

Ita about Caila. I think at this point , it's easier to break it to her one to one . Give full explanation of his feelings . Then deal with his pain before facing the other two. Must be so awkward facing the two knowing what he said /did.  . Weird! Just weird!

Curious when photos from episodes appear in the press page...there are none up till now -- do they usually wait to the last minute? If not could there be a reason why they don't have them up yet?

Diana wrote:IMO he was definitely drunk during his ILY in the new preview (sounds like it was to JoJo)

I felt more sincerity in "in love with with you as well" JMO

He did slur . Makes you think how people wake up married after a night of drunkeness, and confused how it happened. :shocked!:


Too much merlot
He went with the flow
Forgot it was a show
Now he'll go doh

rc49ers wrote:Ben could of been Dreaming that he said I love you to two .  

My fear would be what name he'll say while dreaming .

Last night I watched the scene in Mexico where he makes out with JoJo and  he talks about trust and promises to never blindside her. Yikes! I imagine the soundbite will make a reappearance.
The weepy clip of JoJo where she says

I have completely fallen for Ben 100% I just couldn't imagine him falling that way for someone else

makes me curious..doubt they let him tell them at the RC about what has transpired..so could this clip be from the finale?