The Bachelor 20 - Ben Higgins - General Discussion - *Sleuthing - Spoilers* #3

Ita that Ben might not be so popular after his season. But so it goes sometimes with someone who wears their feelings on their their sleeve or doesn't have a poker face. It can lead to pitfalls. I think if his F1 truly understands his honest heartedness , she'll understand . If LB is the F1 as we think she is, all the better. She doesn't have the same degree of trust issues as Jojo and will see it was part of Ben's nature and process to love Jojo but not be in love with her as he was with LB. jmo

sosleepy wrote:I'm going wait until I see it play out to form an opinion. That being said, I'm sure JoJo is fine. It was Bachelor bubble love, not real life.  She's probably all over it regardless what happened and is hoping for the Bachette gig. And frankly, I hope she gets it.

Besides that, Jojo has the best person to carry her through this after she got over the initial shock. Her brother who likewise did not make it to the very end in a reality dating show. He might have helped her burst that bubble and see that there's life after the burst . Empathy.

veg_out wrote:Ben closes his segment in the opener with this statement: "I’m looking for ways in life to make me a better man, and I think, finding my wife, would make me a better man." IMO, when we hear Ben say, "This woman is making me a better man," I think that we've found his F1.

"This girl right now is changing me." is a good start.

(IMO)

Has anyone noticed we haven't gotten a single ITM from Ben regarding Lauren since their date in episode 3? We've gone 3 whole episodes without hearing a single thought from Ben either in ITM or voiceover about Lauren, outside of the small mentions of not being able to get what Leah said out of his head, but no real insight into his feelings or relationship with Lauren. We have heard plenty of Lauren's thoughts. I'm sure it's because everything they had him saying just gave it all away. I'm excited for this date just to hear more of Ben's thoughts and get inside his head again.

I'm hoping we'll see more ITMs with Ben re: Lauren, too. But I do think ITMs are used to move the story along- and the story involving Lauren this week mostly had to do with Leah's exit. As the romance heats up, I think (hope) we'll see/hear more of his thoughts about Lauren.

Re: the Wetpaint article. The Bachelors often try to make it better with their f2 when letting them go but they just can't. I think that Ben was trying to do that with Jojo but she's not going to want to hear it imo. There's just not a good way to break up with someone who you have feelings for but not as much as the f1. I'm sure there's a lot of guilt involved as well.

albean99 wrote:Re: the Wetpaint article. The Bachelors often try to make it better with their f2 when letting them go but they just can't. I think that Ben was trying to do that with Jojo but she's not going to want to hear it imo. There's just not a good way to break up with someone who you have feelings for but not as much as the f1. I'm sure there's a lot of guilt involved as well.

Can I just add that if intimacy in the FS was also included , the pill becomes even more bitter to swallow at the breakup. It's a prerogative that can cause regret in hindsight .

And as every season we will never actually know if Ben had "intimacy" or not in the FS, and with how many girls...

albean99 wrote: Re: the Wetpaint article. The Bachelors often try to make it better with their f2 when letting them go but they just can't. I think that Ben was trying to do that with Jojo but she's not going to want to hear it imo. There's just not a good way to break up with someone who you have feelings for but not as much as the f1. I'm sure there's a lot of guilt involved as well.

Usually when the one breaking up tries to make it easier, they just end up making it worse. Whatever Ben says to JoJo, there's always a 'but' in the end. 'I REALLY do love you... BUT..' 

Irl someone offered to 'break up date' me after breaking up with me to make it easier. 

Omg that is so cute!! What a good friend!! 

sophienette wrote:And as every season we will never actually know if Ben had "intimacy" or not in the FS, and with how many girls...

Unless JoJo pulls a Nick at the ATFR! Haha- doubt it.

Who thinks it is a normal FRC like RS stated? I would love Ben to have been able to let his F2 go early so that he could focus on the proposal day being about F1 since I suspect he knew who his F1 was at least by that day. But, there were sad tears in his FRC suit, so perhaps producers and showrunners convinced him to take F2 to the end. So twisted!