Re: Andi Dorfman & Josh Murray - Fan Forum - General Discussion Thread #3

[Ash2214]

^ That's really funny. Many of the guys came out after the season saying they knew she was going to end up with Josh and thought they were the perfect fit. They saw the similarities, they saw she was different with him, living in the same city, etc.

[AnandaMarie]

^ That's really funny. Many of the guys came out after the season saying they knew she was going to end up with Josh and thought they were the perfect fit. They saw the similarities, they saw she was different with him, living in the same city, etc.

Yeah. Some of you guys here seem to think the worst about Andi and Josh. It's nice that people that actually met them and know them think that they were in love and would work out because even though I have obviously never met them, i would love more than anything to see the fix things and make their relationship work.

[stuckinsc]

I guess my problem with assuming that Andi should change and get back together with Josh is that IMO it isn't what Andi wants.  She was happiest when she was out and about and having her picture taken.  She absolutely loved that.  

I guess for me, I respect Andi enough to know what it is she wants right now and I actually admire her for admitting it.  It is much harder to end an engagement than to play along and make a mistake.

If they are meant to be, they will both need to compromise.  Andi will need to have the children but Josh will also have to wait.  

As for it taking even longer now, I happen to disagree, be it going back together or someone else, I think this will help them both to see what they really want and need and to also be more honest in looking for the deeper values and not just the red hot chemistry.

Chemistry is awesome, but if you don't have the foundation underneath it doesn't last.  It is more important IMO to really like the person you marry, than to feel that butterfly love.  True like IMO leads to deep love more than butterflies do.

And I actually respect Andi and Josh, I didn't want her to pick him because of the constant doubting and grilling. But at first I saw a couple genuinely enjoying themselves and getting to know each other. I respect that they both tried. I think Andi truly did want to want what Josh wanted and I guess unlike some others, I respect that she made the tough choice and was honest with herself and Josh. She could have married him and just took BC and never let him know why they weren't getting pregnant. She did the hard thing IMO admitting that right now it wasn't for her.

[Ash2214]

^ That's really funny. Many of the guys came out after the season saying they knew she was going to end up with Josh and thought they were the perfect fit. They saw the similarities, they saw she was different with him, living in the same city, etc.

Yeah.  Some of you guys here seem to think the worst about Andi and Josh. It's nice that people that actually met them and know them think that they were in love and would work out because even though I have obviously never met them, i would love more than anything to see the fix things and make their relationship work.

I certainly don't think the worst about them. I think Andi knew she wanted Josh from the moment he stepped out of the limo. I think she tried to fight it because of her own fears and also because of production induced fear, but she still chose him because Josh was who she wanted and loved. Josh chose Andi even after all the questioning she put him through because he wanted and loved her. I genuinely think they loved each other and wanted to make it work, but it's also very possible that the two of them were just on two different paths. You can desperately love someone, but if you're not on the same page it's very, very difficult to make it work.

[AnandaMarie]

I guess my problem with assuming that Andi should change and get back together with Josh is that IMO it isn't what Andi wants.  She was happiest when she was out and about and having her picture taken.  She absolutely loved that.  

I guess for me, I respect Andi enough to know what it is she wants right now and I actually admire her for admitting it.  It is much harder to end an engagement than to play along and make a mistake.

If they are meant to be, they will both need to compromise.  Andi will need to have the children but Josh will also have to wait.  

As for it taking even longer now, I happen to disagree, be it going back together or someone else, I think this will help them both to see what they really want and need and to also be more honest in looking for the deeper values and not just the red hot chemistry.

Chemistry is awesome, but if you don't have the foundation underneath it doesn't last.  It is more important IMO to really like the person you marry, than to feel that butterfly love.  True like IMO leads to deep love more than butterflies do.

And I actually respect Andi and Josh, I didn't want her to pick him because of the constant doubting and grilling.  But at first I saw a couple genuinely enjoying themselves and getting to know each other.  I respect that they both tried.  I think Andi truly did want to want what Josh wanted and I guess unlike some others, I respect that she made the tough choice and was honest with herself and Josh.  She could have married him and just took BC and never let him know why they weren't getting pregnant.  She did the hard thing IMO admitting that right now it wasn't for her.

I think they had the chemistry and love but didn't spend enough time building their relationship. But I think that because they loved each other, I hope that they can get back together, out of the public eye, and build their relationship.I do think that they will have to compromise on when to have children though but I hope and think that they can make it work.

[stuckinsc]

^ That's really funny. Many of the guys came out after the season saying they knew she was going to end up with Josh and thought they were the perfect fit. They saw the similarities, they saw she was different with him, living in the same city, etc.

Yeah.  Some of you guys here seem to think the worst about Andi and Josh. It's nice that people that actually met them and know them think that they were in love and would work out because even though I have obviously never met them, i would love more than anything to see the fix things and make their relationship work.

I certainly don't think the worst about them. I think Andi knew she wanted Josh from the moment he stepped out of the limo. I think she tried to fight it because of her own fears and also because of production induced fear, but she still chose him because Josh was who she wanted and loved. Josh chose Andi even after all the questioning she put him through because he wanted and loved her. I genuinely think they loved each other and wanted to make it work, but it's also very possible that the two of them were just on two different paths. You can desperately love someone, but if you're not on the same page it's very, very difficult to make it work.

Like I have said I went through this with Charlie and Sarah what seems like forever ago.  I completely understand how hard it is to let go of your favorite couple.  

I admire the effort these two put into this. I truly believe they gave it there all.  Now I respect that if they both decided they had to split, that it was hard and but they saw that it was best for them.  

AM, if they are supposed to be, they will come back together, when and if they both are willing to compromise.  It shouldn't just be him or her.  Until then or if not, I just wish them both the best.

They are both handling the break up with a lot of class and grace.  No cryptic IG posts, no nasty words, they are truly being very respectful of each other and I admire them for the way they are handling this, something that I am sure is hard on both of them.

[Elle]

I agree that Andi and Josh were truly in love. What they had is too special and too rare to give up on so easily. I know they were facing many obstacles but I don’t think they were insurmountable. I go back and forth as to whom I think called it off, and find myself feeling anger towards the one I think is responsible at the time. I believe they both went into this adventure with good intensions. Josh said he wanted an intelligent, strong, woman. He said he found that to be a sexy quality, and that’s exactly what he found in Andi. Josh had all the qualities that Andi was looking for. She might have gone into the experience looking to find someone other than her usual type, but in the end she couldn’t fight the chemistry she had with Josh. Their love for each other seemed to grow during the first few months after the show but then their lives took a chaotic turn when they were thrust into the spotlight. I think Andi took the brunt of it because she didn’t have the confidence in herself to ignore the negative comments that were constantly being made about her. Fame for her became a double edged sword. She was given more opportunities to pursue some of her dreams but it seemed that everything she tried was heavily scrutinized and criticized. Josh seemed to have an easier time of it but was struggling with his desire to have a normal life, get married, and have a family. I think Andi wanted all of those things too but her time frame wasn’t in line with Josh’s. I think MM was too quick to make her statement and maybe should have let the two of them handle it themselves. Josh is a 30 year old man. I have total respect for his love for his family, but if he wants to get married and start his own family he will have to make that relationship his priority. I still feel it isn’t too late for them to realize that what they have together is a once in a lifetime love that they are unlikely to find with anyone else. I wish there was someone in their lives that they could seek unbiased counsel from. I will continue to root for them!

[AnandaMarie]

I hope that they're supposed to be together because i think they're perfect for each other. And yes, I do think that they need to compromise but i believe in their love and i hope that they get back together and make some kind of compromise and fix the mistakes that they made. That kind of love is hard to find and i hope that they never give up on it.

[Ladybug82]

Great posts Ash and Stuck!  

I don't think the worst of them, but I don't watch the show with rose colored glasses on either.  I've watched enough to know how edited everything we see is.  I don't wish anyone any ill will. I honestly hope and wish the best for them both moving forward in life...no matter if that's as singles, as a couple (getting back together) or finding that special someone meant just for each of them.   I hope they continue to handle everything in the coming days as they have so far, with much class.  Breakups are never easy, so a very public one can only be that much worse.

[AnandaMarie]

I agree that Andi and Josh were truly in love. What they had is too special and too rare to give up on so easily. I know they were facing many obstacles but I don’t think they were insurmountable.  I go back and forth as to whom I think called it off, and find myself feeling anger towards the one I think is responsible at the time.  I believe they both went into this adventure with good intensions.  Josh said he wanted an intelligent, strong, woman.  He said he found that to be a sexy quality, and that’s exactly what he found in Andi.  Josh had all the qualities that Andi was looking for.  She might have gone into the experience looking to find someone other than her usual type, but in the end she couldn’t fight the chemistry she had with Josh. Their love for each other seemed to grow during the first few months after the show but then their lives took a chaotic turn when they were thrust into the spotlight.  I think Andi took the brunt of it because she didn’t have the confidence in herself to ignore the negative comments that were constantly being made about her. Fame for her became a double edged sword.  She was given more opportunities to pursue some of her dreams but it seemed that everything she tried was heavily scrutinized and criticized.  Josh seemed to have an easier time of it but was struggling with his desire to have a normal life, get married, and have a family. I think Andi wanted all of those things too but her time frame wasn’t in line with Josh’s.  I think MM was too quick to make her statement and maybe should have let the two of them handle it themselves.  Josh is a 30 year old man.  I have total respect for his love for his family, but if he wants to get married and start his own family he will have to make that relationship his priority. I still feel it isn’t too late for them to realize that what they have together is a once in a lifetime love that they are unlikely to find with anyone else.  I wish there was someone in their lives that they could seek unbiased counsel from. I will continue to root for them!

You have no idea how much I agree and how much i love you right now. Everybody else is making me cry again tonight. Elle, I agree with every single word that you have said. I also think that MM was took quick to announce the breakup and i do hope that the find an unbiased counsel. Their love is special and is worth doing anything to save.

[umngirl]

There's no proof they gave up easily. It could be something they struggled with for weeks or even months.

I personally wouldn't want them to get back together just because I liked them as a couple and thought they were meant to be. That's not my decision to make. If they don't think they are right for each other long term, it's best to end it now before you get even more invested.

[AnandaMarie]

There's no proof they gave up easily. It could be something they struggled with for weeks or even months.

I personally wouldn't want them to get back together just because I liked them as a couple and thought they were meant to be. That's not my decision to make. If they don't think they are right for each other long term, it's best to end it now before you get even more invested.

We also don't know how long they tried for. To me they seemed happy until their 6 month anniversary and if thats when the problems began, i hope they would have tried harder. I think it's not too late though. I hope that they can still get back together and try once more.

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