Andi Dorfman & Josh Murray - Bachelorette 10 - General Discussion #2

julychild wrote:This was tweeted by Jenny Molen, who happens to be very close to Elan, and production in general. To me it shows that the producers knew about the breakup by Monday (anyone could have been RS source):

Thanks for watching everyone. I'll leave you with this one last thought: Andy's boyfriend hates her.

Good night:)

— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) January 6, 2015

It shows Jan 6th,but she posted it when the show ended on the 5th.

Is Elan one of RS sources?????

Lmao I can only hope they're still forced to go and someone is there to capture the magic on video for us.

KB_Mom wrote:

julychild wrote:This was tweeted by Jenny Molen, who happens to be very close to Elan, and production in general. To me it shows that the producers knew about the breakup by Monday (anyone could have been RS source):

Thanks for watching everyone. I'll leave you with this one last thought: Andy's boyfriend hates her.

Good night:)

— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) January 6, 2015

It shows Jan 6th,but she posted it when the show ended on the 5th.

Is Elan one of RS sources?????

I've always secretly wondered...

sara11 wrote:Mohegan Sun ‏@MoheganSun  
2m2 minutes ago
You watched their romance blossom on @BacheloretteABC…see @andidorfman and Josh Murray (@jmurbulldog) here on 1/16! http://bit.ly/1zNakz1




Haha and here's another one...

Like Kasha said in one of her posts during her phone call looking for info on this event, she had hard time explaining to them who J/A were. I guess this is what happens when you have a AndiDorfmanPress@gmail.com looking after your promotions/appearances.

aviej wrote:I agree with Nannymargie. In life you need a partner who would balance you off - not another extension of yourself. If you married someone who over analyzed and thought just like you it'll drive you crazy. I think when you marry someone opposite to yourself you can lean on each other's strengths and weaknesses in difficult times. Is JP the cerebral match to Ash? I doubt. But a relationship is not founded on brain power. IMO, the most important things in a relationship are God, love and communication. I do believe they were deeply in love, I do think they communicated to each other - maybe sometimes bickered, but who hasn't. Josh didn't care that he might get sent home, he was open and honest about his feelings for the lie detector test. I think Andi was most vulnerable to Josh in that she shared her deepest hurt of a past relationship with him.  Yes she and Nick communicated well on a philosophical sense but that's just philosophy. He could barely hold two sentences together when talking to her. Post show Andi did say that they did not show Josh's intellectual side. According to Andi, she had a greater love with Josh and that's what it came down to. I really hope their friends try to talk them into getting back together at least to give it another shot to say we tried again and failed, then they can really move on. But i do think they need to take a vacation together, outside of the US where they can just be themselves rather than being a brand and figure things out there.

I think that depends on your personality. Some want the balance and some don't. I liken this to my own version of Mendel's inheritance theory.



When two people get together, people usually describe them as having a lot in common or being opposites. Based on personal experience, I further subdivide that into similar backgrounds/experiences and/or similar values, hopes and ways of looking at things. While people who have similar backgrounds usually end up with similar values, that is not always the case, hence my square describing Mendel's pea experiments.

Substitute similar background for the pistil and similar values for the pollen. Similar background is B, different background is b. Similar values are V and different values are v. Substitute those in the chart and it breaks down like this:

BV -- Two people who have a similar background and similar values  = Typically solid, happy relationship/marriage
bv -- Two people who have different backgrounds and different values  = Physical chemistry, great sex, but eventually burns itself out
Bv -- Two people who have same backgrounds but different values = Unhappy relationship/marriage and most probably ends in a split/divorce
bV -- Two people who have different backgrounds but have similar values = Happy and stimulating relationship/marriage

For me, right now, Andi and Josh fall in the Bv category. They have very similar backgrounds, education, religion and move in similar social circles. They were most likely going to run into each other in Atlanta whether or not they were ever on the show. On paper they look perfect...and this is where the trouble may start. People often assume that because their backgrounds are so similar, that their values are as well. This is not always the case and why the trouble occurs. IMO it is the core values...beliefs, dreams, aspirations, motivations...that really keep a couple together. You may have all the social background in common, but if your values differ you will be miserable. (I speak from experience here.) It is easy to fall into the trap that you are perfect together and only realise that you are not that good a match when it is too late and you are married. Your friends wonder why couldn't they make it work?

Each of us wants different things. It may depend on your time in life. You may be OK with an sv relationship when young or when just wanting a bit of fluff and tickle, but it would get old quickly if you are looking to settle down and have a family. SV may be great for some, but others might find it boring. For me personally, I prefer the sV relationship. Each brings different things to the table and as long as you both at the core want the same things, those differences can stimulate a relationship that keeps you growing individually and as a couple. The challenge may be meeting in the first place and getting beyond the initial differences. To each his own. That is what keeps things interesting.

Hey, too bad Nick is still considered persona non grata. Might be for other reasons, for example, has ABC and production ever gotten past Nick babbling the ending of the season so rows of airline passengers could hear him and while being video taped? Just saying ...

Amberish wrote:Hey, too bad Nick is still considered persona non grata. Might be for other reasons, or example, has ABC and production ever gotten past Nick babbling the ending of the season so rows of airline passengers could hear him and while being video taped? Just saying ...

I'm pretty sure they have. They are buddies and brothers.

Chris Harrison @chrisbharrison · 2h 2 hours ago
Back at Ya brother. Hoping for a great game RT @viallnicholas28: @chrisbharrison good luck buddy..Go Packers! Should be a great game.

GuardianAngel wrote:

Amberish wrote:Hey, too bad Nick is still considered persona non grata. Might be for other reasons, for example, has ABC and production ever gotten past Nick babbling the ending of the season so rows of airline passengers could hear him and while being video taped? Just saying ...

I'm pretty sure they have. They are buddies and brothers.

Chris Harrison @chrisbharrison  ·  2h 2 hours ago
Back at Ya brother. Hoping for a great game RT @viallnicholas28: @chrisbharrison good luck buddy..Go Packers! Should be a great game.

Oh, I didn't know; are they related?

^No. It's an expression. CH calls plenty of guys "brother".

Amberish wrote:

GuardianAngel wrote:

Amberish wrote:Hey, too bad Nick is still considered persona non grata. Might be for other reasons, for example, has ABC and production ever gotten past Nick babbling the ending of the season so rows of airline passengers could hear him and while being video taped? Just saying ...

I'm pretty sure they have. They are buddies and brothers.

Chris Harrison @chrisbharrison  ·  2h 2 hours ago
Back at Ya brother. Hoping for a great game RT @viallnicholas28: @chrisbharrison good luck buddy..Go Packers! Should be a great game.

Oh, I didn't know; are they related?

They must have reconnected, just like long lost relatives. Or maybe that's CH's way of apologizing for Nick having to put up with Andi's #hecantsithere attitude. Who knows.

Sprite wrote:

aviej wrote:I agree with Nannymargie. In life you need a partner who would balance you off - not another extension of yourself. If you married someone who over analyzed and thought just like you it'll drive you crazy. I think when you marry someone opposite to yourself you can lean on each other's strengths and weaknesses in difficult times. Is JP the cerebral match to Ash? I doubt. But a relationship is not founded on brain power. IMO, the most important things in a relationship are God, love and communication. I do believe they were deeply in love, I do think they communicated to each other - maybe sometimes bickered, but who hasn't. Josh didn't care that he might get sent home, he was open and honest about his feelings for the lie detector test. I think Andi was most vulnerable to Josh in that she shared her deepest hurt of a past relationship with him.  Yes she and Nick communicated well on a philosophical sense but that's just philosophy. He could barely hold two sentences together when talking to her. Post show Andi did say that they did not show Josh's intellectual side. According to Andi, she had a greater love with Josh and that's what it came down to. I really hope their friends try to talk them into getting back together at least to give it another shot to say we tried again and failed, then they can really move on. But i do think they need to take a vacation together, outside of the US where they can just be themselves rather than being a brand and figure things out there.

I think that depends on your personality. Some want the balance and some don't. I liken this to my own version of Mendel's inheritance theory.



When two people get together, people usually describe them as having a lot in common or being opposites. Based on personal experience, I further subdivide that into similar backgrounds/experiences and/or similar values, hopes and ways of looking at things. While people who have similar backgrounds usually end up with similar values, that is not always the case, hence my square describing Mendel's pea experiments.

Substitute similar background for the pistil and similar values for the pollen. Similar background is B, different background is b. Similar values are V and different values are v. Substitute those in the chart and it breaks down like this:

BV -- Two people who have a similar background and similar values  = Typically solid, happy relationship/marriage
bv -- Two people who have different backgrounds and different values  = Physical chemistry, great sex, but eventually burns itself out
Bv -- Two people who have same backgrounds but different values = Unhappy relationship/marriage and most probably ends in a split/divorce
bV -- Two people who have different backgrounds but have similar values = Happy and stimulating relationship/marriage

For me, right now, Andi and Josh fall in the Bv category. They have very similar backgrounds, education, religion and move in similar social circles. They were most likely going to run into each other in Atlanta whether or not they were ever on the show. On paper they look perfect...and this is where the trouble may start. People often assume that because their backgrounds are so similar, that their values are as well. This is not always the case and why the trouble occurs. IMO it is the core values...beliefs, dreams, aspirations, motivations...that really keep a couple together. You may have all the social background in common, but if your values differ you will be miserable. (I speak from experience here.) It is easy to fall into the trap that you are perfect together and only realise that you are not that good a match when it is too late and you are married. Your friends wonder why couldn't they make it work?

Each of us wants different things. It may depend on your time in life. You may be OK with an sv relationship when young or when just wanting a bit of fluff and tickle, but it would get old quickly if you are looking to settle down and have a family. SV may be great for some, but others might find it boring. For me personally, I prefer the sV relationship. Each brings different things to the table and as long as you both at the core want the same things, those differences can stimulate a relationship that keeps you growing individually and as a couple. The challenge may be meeting in the first place and getting beyond the initial differences. To each his own. That is what keeps things interesting.

Sprite, I love your whole post!

The one thing I thinks differs is that Josh and Andi's families don't have the same values. The Murrays have a strong faith, I hope this won't cause trouble, but Aaron has tattoos of both the Star of David and the Cross. They celebrate holidays, we have pics of them going to church Christmas of 2013. J&A spent Christmas in Vegas with her family. I actually think this may have been a bigger problem. Josh is religious and has faith. Andi and her family seem to be culturally Jewish, but not practicing at all. And Andi to me seemed to want to celebrate holidays primarily with her family and not Josh's. They were actually with her family on each actual Holiday. That might cause tension too. Josh wanted the wife and kids and family holidays and Andi wanted Vegas for Christmas.

stuckinsc wrote:

aviej wrote:I agree with Nannymargie. In life you need a partner who would balance you off - not another extension of yourself. If you married someone who over analyzed and thought just like you it'll drive you crazy. I think when you marry someone opposite to yourself you can lean on each other's strengths and weaknesses in difficult times. Is JP the cerebral match to Ash? I doubt. But a relationship is not founded on brain power. IMO, the most important things in a relationship are God, love and communication. I do believe they were deeply in love, I do think they communicated to each other - maybe sometimes bickered, but who hasn't. Josh didn't care that he might get sent home, he was open and honest about his feelings for the lie detector test. I think Andi was most vulnerable to Josh in that she shared her deepest hurt of a past relationship with him.  Yes she and Nick communicated well on a philosophical sense but that's just philosophy. He could barely hold two sentences together when talking to her. Post show Andi did say that they did not show Josh's intellectual side. According to Andi, she had a greater love with Josh and that's what it came down to. I really hope their friends try to talk them into getting back together at least to give it another shot to say we tried again and failed, then they can really move on. But i do think they need to take a vacation together, outside of the US where they can just be themselves rather than being a brand and figure things out there.

As for intellectual side, I think Josh as one, he is just more likely to be happy and not moody.  In ways he reminds me of my dad.  He always viewed the good of things and refused to wallow in misery. Andi seems like she would be a wallower.  I will say that certain statements of Andi's and the making fun of how Josh eats, etc seemed to me that she seemed like she thought she was a bit better than him in manners and intellect, again, OMO.

Yeah, I definitely wasn't referring to IQ or anything like that when talking about cerebral connections. I think in many ways Josh seems a lot smarter than Andi. They're just different personality types, especially when it comes to facing adversity, and I can imagine them being frustrated by each other in the long run. I don't know if Andi thought she was better than Josh, I just think she likes to think of herself as this strong independent woman, which she isn't really, and has taken her cues from SATC and such trash.