Andi Dorfman & Josh Murray - Bachelorette 10 - General Discussion #2

albean99 wrote:I haven't been following Andi. Does she have any opportunities and are they thinking of moving to L.A.?

Nope, not that they have mentioned. They've been living together in Josh's apartment and it appears they're house hunting - at least that's what Andi and Patti have said. Most of the events they've done since the finale have been charity events and they haven't really done anything major. They recently hosted a party in AC, but other than that, it's mostly been charity events they've attended. Andi and Josh have both have been very, very adamant that they love Atlanta and that's where they will be staying. They've grown very close to Patti and Hy as well.

In regards to Andi's opportunities, there hasn't been anything that we've seen, but from everything she's said and that Josh seems to agree with, once things settle down, she wants to go back into law. And like Mia said, I think as a couple they have the finacial stability for Andi to take time off. Josh still has his salary as a finacial adviser, plus what they get for their sponsorship of Advocare, and all of Andi's income from doing the bachelorette.

Yeah, that was a big thing that slipped my mind...that Andi got a paycheck for doing The Bachelorette.  She has that money, too.

It's kind of funny, because I will stand here until I'm blue in the face defending a person's right to choose for themselves where they work, what they work at, or how often they work. I see it as an individual's choice. I do not make judgements about a person based on that. I know that each person's circumstances is unique. So, I don't think badly of Andi for taking time off, etc.

BUT...I have a much more difficult time swallowing the idea that it is okay for a grown adult child (beyond college years) receiving financial help from their parents, when the child is a graduate school educated, working professional. I say this because of the speculation that Hy chipped in to pay Andi's rent.  Not financial help to provide a roof over her head, food in her belly, or clothes on her back, but money to upgrade all of those things "to a manner in which she had grown accustomed".  I know every one has a different opinion on this.  For me, personally, I don't agree with it---from the standpoint of the parent or the grown child. Although, I suspect that others may see nothing wrong with it.

I guess a lot of our personal opinions come from our own upbringings, family values, and experiences. I was raised to value my own autonomy---not just the idea that I could voice my own opinions and make my own way in life---but also that I would take full responsibility for myself as an adult, that I would be grateful for what my parents provided me while growing up but not take advantage of their generosity, and that it was not necessary to "keep up with the Jones" such that I needed my parents to supplement my income to get there. This is where I TRY not to judge Andi or her parents, BUT, in truth, I do. It may make the parents feel needed or good to know that they are providing for their child, but at a certain point it does because counter-productive to the development of the child, IMO.  

Like I said previously, I really do not know the details of Andi's finances. I am just going by what I remember being discussed on this board a long time ago. That, and the inferences made during the show by Andi herself that she was spoiled, and THAT is one of the things that leaves a bad taste in my mouth about Andi. Does it make her a horrible monster? Of course not. But is it something I look at with admiration and respect? No, I do not.

This is just one small element of who she is that makes me put a check in the negative column. Along with a few other things that make me put checks in the negative column. Of course, there are other aspects of Andi that make me put a check in the positive column. I do not see her as all wonderful or all horrible. I see her like every other one of us---trying but flawed.  Peace.

How do we know that Hy was helping her with rent?

bleuberry wrote:How do we know that Hy was helping her with rent?

I don't know if it was just speculation based upon the location and price of the unit she lived in.  It may not even be true. I really don't know.

ETA: And if it is NOT true, then I am simply stating my personal opinion about a situation similar to Andi's in generic terms. Not trying to start World War III.

MiaHawk wrote:

bleuberry wrote:How do we know that Hy was helping her with rent?

I don't know if it was just speculation based upon the location and price of the unit she lived in.  It may not even be true. I really don't know.

This is the first I've heard or read about it. I'm curious if it's speculation or what the source is. BTW, weren't Andi/Kelly roommates?

Lucas15 wrote:

MiaHawk wrote:I think the difference in Andi and Ashley's upbringing and family wealth is a critical factor in each of their decisions---Ashley to continue on and Andi to take time off from work.  From what I recall, Ashley was not from a very well to do family. Her sister is the queen of extreme couponing. Andi, on the other hand, has been taken care of by her parents (some say doted upon, spoiled). IIRC Andi's apartment rent was partially paid for by Hy?  If she has a financial cushion, Andi may not have the urgency to return to work. She now lives with Josh who has a salary. And maybe she doesn't have loans to pay off? So, IMO, finances probably plays the biggest factor in the decision.

Good memory Mia - I also recall substantial differences in family wealth at least from the standpoint of her family's home (more visible than most if you watched her HTD with Brad).

Also Ashley took time off after her undergraduate work before she went into dental school. Details were always a bit sketchy but I always got the impression that was time she spent sowing her wild oats and deciding just what she really wanted to do with her career, which turned out that she wanted to be a dentist. AFAIK Andi went from undergraduate into law school and then into a job so is more only now really considering her ultimate career path which is something Ashley had already done before she started dental school. Like I said earlier, the thing most common between Ashley and Andi is that they were both The Bachelorette but beyond that, there's little is common.

The taking time off after undergrad to get all the requirements for dental school is common too. They actually have to have time put in before they enter dental school. Similar to medicine where most medical students have done hours in clinics or research.

I do think law allows you to enter law school without much but your undergrad and your LSAT. Is this the case?

I have met many lawyers for whom law wasn't what they thought it would be. Most of the dentists and dental students I know have a very good expectation of what their career will be and are mostly happy with their choice.

Going straight into law school from undergrad, it maybe law wasn't what Andi expected. That is okay.

We know approx what andi's salary was: $57,000/yr. Someone familiar with where she lived prior to The Bachelor speculated that after taxes, etc., she couldn't have afforded the rent without help. That's what I recall.

IrishGal wrote:We know approx what andi's salary was: $57,000/yr.  Someone familiar with where she lived prior to The Bachelor speculated that after taxes, etc., she couldn't have afforded the rent without help. That's what I recall.

Thank you. I wasn't part of any of that discussion, but I do remember it being discussed. And it was discussed a long time ago. Not even sure in what thread.

This is a discussion thread.
For those that need reminding of what this means I will refer to the site rules.
Any positive/negative discussion and or speculation within our site rules is acceptable on this forum.
What is not acceptable is telling other members how to post.
Thank you.

Maybe I didn't express myself properly & if so I apologize for that. I don't want to tell anyone how to post because we all have opinions & I was only expressing my own & My only point is we all have choices in life & so does Andi.

stuckinsc wrote:

Lucas15 wrote:

MiaHawk wrote:I think the difference in Andi and Ashley's upbringing and family wealth is a critical factor in each of their decisions---Ashley to continue on and Andi to take time off from work.  From what I recall, Ashley was not from a very well to do family. Her sister is the queen of extreme couponing. Andi, on the other hand, has been taken care of by her parents (some say doted upon, spoiled). IIRC Andi's apartment rent was partially paid for by Hy?  If she has a financial cushion, Andi may not have the urgency to return to work. She now lives with Josh who has a salary. And maybe she doesn't have loans to pay off? So, IMO, finances probably plays the biggest factor in the decision.

Good memory Mia - I also recall substantial differences in family wealth at least from the standpoint of her family's home (more visible than most if you watched her HTD with Brad).

Also Ashley took time off after her undergraduate work before she went into dental school. Details were always a bit sketchy but I always got the impression that was time she spent sowing her wild oats and deciding just what she really wanted to do with her career, which turned out that she wanted to be a dentist. AFAIK Andi went from undergraduate into law school and then into a job so is more only now really considering her ultimate career path which is something Ashley had already done before she started dental school. Like I said earlier, the thing most common between Ashley and Andi is that they were both The Bachelorette but beyond that, there's little is common.

The taking time off after undergrad to get all the requirements for dental school is common too.  They actually have to have time put in before they enter dental school.  Similar to medicine where most medical students have done hours in clinics or research.

I do think law allows you to enter law school without much but your undergrad and your LSAT.  Is this the case?

I have met many lawyers for whom law wasn't what they thought it would be.  Most of the dentists and dental students I know have a very good expectation of what their career will be and are mostly happy with their choice.

Going straight into law school from undergrad, it maybe law wasn't what Andi expected.  That is okay.

I'm so confused by what requirements you're talking about for dental school... my boyfriend and best friend are both in dental school and went straight from undergrad.

lurker11 wrote:

stuckinsc wrote:

Lucas15 wrote:

Good memory Mia - I also recall substantial differences in family wealth at least from the standpoint of her family's home (more visible than most if you watched her HTD with Brad).

Also Ashley took time off after her undergraduate work before she went into dental school. Details were always a bit sketchy but I always got the impression that was time she spent sowing her wild oats and deciding just what she really wanted to do with her career, which turned out that she wanted to be a dentist. AFAIK Andi went from undergraduate into law school and then into a job so is more only now really considering her ultimate career path which is something Ashley had already done before she started dental school. Like I said earlier, the thing most common between Ashley and Andi is that they were both The Bach

elorette but beyond that, there's little is common.

The taking time off after undergrad to get all the requirements for dental school is common too.  They actually have to have time put in before they enter dental school.  Similar to medicine where most medical students have done hours in clinics or research.

I do think law allows you to enter law school without much but your undergrad and your LSAT.  Is this the case?

I have met many lawyers for whom law wasn't what they thought it would be.  Most of the dentists and dental students I know have a very good expectation of what their career will be and are mostly happy with their choice.

Going straight into law school from undergrad, it maybe law wasn't what Andi expected.  That is okay.

I'm so confused by what requirements you're talking about for dental school... my boyfriend and best friend are both in dental school and went straight from undergrad.

Lurker, I'm not Stuckinsc, but I will comment.

If a student has a high enough GPA, has taken all the required undergraduate core course in math and sciences, and has achieved a very good DAT scores, that is what is needed to be accepted to dental school.

But, as you know, it is really super competitive to gain acceptance into dental school. If a student does not get accepted into dental school right out of college, they may spend a year doing a post-graduate year doing research and taking more courses in an attempt to boost their resume. They then can reapply and hope that the extra year of schooling helps them get in. Or maybe they spend more time studying to retake the DAT to get a better score. Also, there are only about 65 dental schools in the US, and their class sizes are typically much smaller than the medical schools. For example, my state's flagship medical school has about 90 students per year but only about 40 dental students per year.

Best of luck to your boyfriend and best friend!