Bachelorette 10 - Andi Dorfman - Episode 10 - MTP-LCD-FRC- July 28/14 *Spoilers & Sleuthing* #2 - Discussion

ThankMeLater wrote:

Tnmomof4 wrote:Personally I think the reason she gave Nick for why she wasn't choosing him was very good.  Basically she was saying that when she looked down the road their way connecting would not work.  Both of the are so alike in that they analyze everything and in the real world, long term, that would drive her crazy.  She realized that she needed someone that would help her get out of head, not make her get in it more.  I think she didn't say it was because of Josh because she realized that even if Josh wasn't in the picture Nick wasn't what she needed long term.
Their's was a romance that worked in the bachelor bubble but in the real world would have eventually crumbled and fortunately she saw that.  Most couples on this show don't.  I don't know if sleeping with him gave her that clarity.  She has said that the intellectual connection she had with Nick was unlike any she'd ever experienced.  Could be, being in the "bubble", she confused it with love for a short while but then realized it really wasn't love and that what she had with Josh was. 
None of us have been in the "bachelor bubble" so we can't even begin to understand what that's like.

I think she appeared so "cold" because she didn't want to give him any hope that there was a chance that she'd change her mind.  He was so adamant that Josh was wrong for her.  Not to say that she  was right but I can certainly understand it.  I know I've been there.  You break up nicely but every overture of "nice" brings hope so you have to rebreak their heart.  Sometimes being cold is the nicest thing you can do to help someone have closure and move on.  Makes me think of the Dumb and Dumber line (I'm not equating Nick with them!) "So you're saying there's a chance?" in response to the girl saying "there's a 1 in a million chance I'd go out with you." (or something like that.

I think this is the best post for all of this.   

mercieme wrote:

GrahamGal wrote:

mercieme wrote:

Re the get a life comment, how do we know he does not have a life? We know for a fact that TPTB and ABC sanctioned / wanted him to do the media tour (the TPTB producer and ABC publicity folks were with him throughout the media tour)? Oh well, it's over today but I just want to let folks know that there will be more media requests for Nick. After all he is now the poster child of the sensitive male per what happened on Monday. Andi and Josh are basking in their love for one  another so my advise is for their fans is to shift focus to celebrating them, this is what helped me personally when there was so much backlash against Des and Chris. And with time the public will move on and before we know it the next season will be upon us 

Ummm I never said he needed to get a life.  Did you mean to attach this to my comment?  I don't see anyone mention that in this chain of post.

I actually have been in only the Andi/Josh threads celebrating their beautiful love story, but decided to come over here today to see what people could still be talking about in this thread.  I went back a couple pages and was surprised people where still taking about this.  After reading some post I reluctantly posted my opinion.  I am glad to here he is done with media and since I haven't watch any of his interviews I cannot speak to his words, only the fact he has done media for 3 days.

I'm leaving now and going back to my corner of the forum.  :hidingchair 

Great catch, apologies. I was responding to the poster above yours that said Nick needs to get a life and was wondering on what basis they knew he didn't have a life. I think it got cut out due to the length limit. Anyways carry on posting, differences of opinions is what makes this place interesting and jumping  

Catdwoman50 wrote:

ThankMeLater wrote:

Tnmomof4 wrote:Personally I think the reason she gave Nick for why she wasn't choosing him was very good.  Basically she was saying that when she looked down the road their way connecting would not work.  Both of the are so alike in that they analyze everything and in the real world, long term, that would drive her crazy.  She realized that she needed someone that would help her get out of head, not make her get in it more.  I think she didn't say it was because of Josh because she realized that even if Josh wasn't in the picture Nick wasn't what she needed long term.
Their's was a romance that worked in the bachelor bubble but in the real world would have eventually crumbled and fortunately she saw that.  Most couples on this show don't.  I don't know if sleeping with him gave her that clarity.  She has said that the intellectual connection she had with Nick was unlike any she'd ever experienced.  Could be, being in the "bubble", she confused it with love for a short while but then realized it really wasn't love and that what she had with Josh was. 
None of us have been in the "bachelor bubble" so we can't even begin to understand what that's like.

I think she appeared so "cold" because she didn't want to give him any hope that there was a chance that she'd change her mind.  He was so adamant that Josh was wrong for her.  Not to say that she  was right but I can certainly understand it.  I know I've been there.  You break up nicely but every overture of "nice" brings hope so you have to rebreak their heart.  Sometimes being cold is the nicest thing you can do to help someone have closure and move on.  Makes me think of the Dumb and Dumber line (I'm not equating Nick with them!) "So you're saying there's a chance?" in response to the girl saying "there's a 1 in a million chance I'd go out with you." (or something like that.

I think this is the best post for all of this.   

I agree.  I saw Andi has always acted differently towards Josh.  All season long, you can tell when Andi starts pulling away for the person she is sending home - that was clear on LCDs.  The only time I saw her vulnerability is towards Josh.  So, blindsided or not, Nick will eventually see that too (like us who are Nick fans, but yet open-minded to see the bigger picture).  I am really happy that Andi pulled the "Eric card" towards Nick at ATFR, to give Nick a wakeup call that he really did not know her as much as he thought he did.  So all's well, let our boy have his 15 mins as well then he can also go home and have his "amazing" with someone else.

Tnmomof4 wrote:Personally I think the reason she gave Nick for why she wasn't choosing him was very good.  Basically she was saying that when she looked down the road their way connecting would not work.  Both of the are so alike in that they analyze everything and in the real world, long term, that would drive her crazy.  She realized that she needed someone that would help her get out of head, not make her get in it more.  I think she didn't say it was because of Josh because she realized that even if Josh wasn't in the picture Nick wasn't what she needed long term.
Their's was a romance that worked in the bachelor bubble but in the real world would have eventually crumbled and fortunately she saw that.  Most couples on this show don't.  I don't know if sleeping with him gave her that clarity.  She has said that the intellectual connection she had with Nick was unlike any she'd ever experienced.  Could be, being in the "bubble", she confused it with love for a short while but then realized it really wasn't love and that what she had with Josh was. 
None of us have been in the "bachelor bubble" so we can't even begin to understand what that's like.

I think she appeared so "cold" because she didn't want to give him any hope that there was a chance that she'd change her mind.  He was so adamant that Josh was wrong for her.  Not to say that she  was right but I can certainly understand it.  I know I've been there.  You break up nicely but every overture of "nice" brings hope so you have to rebreak their heart.  Sometimes being cold is the nicest thing you can do to help someone have closure and move on.  Makes me think of the Dumb and Dumber line (I'm not equating Nick with them!) "So you're saying there's a chance?" in response to the girl saying "there's a 1 in a million chance I'd go out with you." (or something like that.

GrahamGal wrote:

stuckinsc wrote:

GrahamGal wrote:

I was leaving, but wanted to reply to your post to me.

Point taken.  You may be right and he has no choice.  I was unspoiled and just saw it the other day.  I won't go into my opinion of the video as I am sure it has been hashed out over and over on the spoiled side.  Season is over so it doesn't matter anyway.

See you maybe on the spoiled side next season and who knows we may see things the same then.  That's how it usually goes.

Please stick around, for me intelligent opposing opinions are always welcome.  It is great to be able to discuss something.  I admire those who can handle being unspoiled, I don't have the ability, I even read the last page of a book at the beginning.  

OK, I will slip on my big girl panties and continue to come here.  It's hard because I am a lover not a fighter.  

I must say this season was the HARDEST season for me to stay unspoiled, but it was so worth it for me in the end. I could see the love story from the very beginning without all the "noise".

Jeepers wrote:Regarding Andi's less than warm reception to Nick .....  She was probably pretty fed up with his behavior since filming ended...

His comments about things in the plane video
His attempt to see her when she was in Mexico .. With her F1
His attempt to see her again during the MTA weekend
His letter to her
His need to talk to her .. For closure .. At the AFTR
His comment to her during the AFTR

All while she is in a relationship .. That he well knew about

He never got the hint that she was done with him .. He pushed and pushed .. Like NO other F2 has ever done before .. To the point that I am sure she felt harassed by him

Cold!!??  I think she was actually pretty tolerant of him thru out this whole ordeal over the past couple of months .. I am Ware she had to face him at the AFTR .. Her behavior could have been a lot worse and unwelcoming

Put yourself in her place and think .. Honestly .. How you would feel and react to what she had to deal with

Tnmomof4 wrote:I think she appeared so "cold" because she didn't want to give him any hope that there was a chance that she'd change her mind.  He was so adamant that Josh was wrong for her.  Not to say that she  was right but I can certainly understand it.  I know I've been there.  You break up nicely but every overture of "nice" brings hope so you have to rebreak their heart.  Sometimes being cold is the nicest thing you can do to help someone have closure and move on.  Makes me think of the Dumb and Dumber line (I'm not equating Nick with them!) "So you're saying there's a chance?" in response to the girl saying "there's a 1 in a million chance I'd go out with you." (or something like that.

Jeepers wrote:Regarding Andi's less than warm reception to Nick .....  She was probably pretty fed up with his behavior since filming ended...

His comments about things in the plane video
His attempt to see her when she was in Mexico .. With her F1
His attempt to see her again during the MTA weekend
His letter to her
His need to talk to her .. For closure .. At the AFTR
His comment to her during the AFTR

All while she is in a relationship .. That he well knew about

He never got the hint that she was done with him .. He pushed and pushed .. Like NO other F2 has ever done before .. To the point that I am sure she felt harassed by him

Cold!!??  I think she was actually pretty tolerant of him thru out this whole ordeal over the past couple of months .. I am Ware she had to face him at the AFTR .. Her behavior could have been a lot worse and unwelcoming

Put yourself in her place and think .. Honestly .. How you would feel and react to what she had to deal with

Lucas15 wrote:

Tnmomof4 wrote:I think she appeared so "cold" because she didn't want to give him any hope that there was a chance that she'd change her mind.  He was so adamant that Josh was wrong for her.  Not to say that she  was right but I can certainly understand it.  I know I've been there.  You break up nicely but every overture of "nice" brings hope so you have to rebreak their heart.  Sometimes being cold is the nicest thing you can do to help someone have closure and move on.  Makes me think of the Dumb and Dumber line (I'm not equating Nick with them!) "So you're saying there's a chance?" in response to the girl saying "there's a 1 in a million chance I'd go out with you." (or something like that.

I think so also and I think in this particular case the more empathetic she would have been the less Nick would have understood. The only way you can get the message to sink in with someone like Nick is to be cold and firm and perhaps not so nice - that seems to me to have been the only way Nick would get the message.

Jeepers wrote:Regarding Andi's less than warm reception to Nick .....  She was probably pretty fed up with his behavior since filming ended...

His comments about things in the plane video
His attempt to see her when she was in Mexico .. With her F1
His attempt to see her again during the MTA weekend
His letter to her
His need to talk to her .. For closure .. At the AFTR
His comment to her during the AFTR

All while she is in a relationship .. That he well knew about

He never got the hint that she was done with him .. He pushed and pushed .. Like NO other F2 has ever done before .. To the point that I am sure she felt harassed by him

Cold!!??  I think she was actually pretty tolerant of him thru out this whole ordeal over the past couple of months .. I am Ware she had to face him at the AFTR .. Her behavior could have been a lot worse and unwelcoming

Put yourself in her place and think .. Honestly .. How you would feel and react to what she had to deal with

Jeepers your post articulates better than I could why I think Andi had no choice but to do pretty much what she did. Anything else would not have gotten the message through especially since refusing to meet with him or return his phone calls or even acknowledge getting and reading his letter didn't get the message through to Nick. Subtlety and nice didn't work.

Lucas15 wrote:

Tnmomof4 wrote:I think she appeared so "cold" because she didn't want to give him any hope that there was a chance that she'd change her mind.  He was so adamant that Josh was wrong for her.  Not to say that she  was right but I can certainly understand it.  I know I've been there.  You break up nicely but every overture of "nice" brings hope so you have to rebreak their heart.  Sometimes being cold is the nicest thing you can do to help someone have closure and move on.  Makes me think of the Dumb and Dumber line (I'm not equating Nick with them!) "So you're saying there's a chance?" in response to the girl saying "there's a 1 in a million chance I'd go out with you." (or something like that.

I think so also and I think in this particular case the more empathetic she would have been the less Nick would have understood. The only way you can get the message to sink in with someone like Nick is to be cold and firm and perhaps not so nice - that seems to me to have been the only way Nick would get the message.

Jeepers wrote:Regarding Andi's less than warm reception to Nick .....  She was probably pretty fed up with his behavior since filming ended...

His comments about things in the plane video
His attempt to see her when she was in Mexico .. With her F1
His attempt to see her again during the MTA weekend
His letter to her
His need to talk to her .. For closure .. At the AFTR
His comment to her during the AFTR

All while she is in a relationship .. That he well knew about

He never got the hint that she was done with him .. He pushed and pushed .. Like NO other F2 has ever done before .. To the point that I am sure she felt harassed by him

Cold!!??  I think she was actually pretty tolerant of him thru out this whole ordeal over the past couple of months .. I am Ware she had to face him at the AFTR .. Her behavior could have been a lot worse and unwelcoming

Put yourself in her place and think .. Honestly .. How you would feel and react to what she had to deal with

Jeepers your post articulates better than I could why I think Andi had no choice but to do pretty much what she did. Anything else would not have gotten the message through especially since refusing to meet with him or return his phone calls or even acknowledge getting and reading his letter didn't get the message through to Nick. Subtlety and nice didn't work.