Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
Lucas15 wrote:Ash2214 wrote:Andi couldn't get the right words at the ATFR?
Before he even threw out the sex bomb, Andi gave the perfect answer. When CH asked if she ever loved Nick, Andi gave the perfect reply. She stated she had feelings for Nick. She knew that if she were to do this whole process all over again, she would still have the same relationship with Nick that she did the first time. She told him she meant everything she said about him. She said she meant it when she said he made her feel like a woman. She enjoyed getting to know him, but in the end (she also admitted her mistake) she said that she probably should have just said this earlier (probably meaning the initial break up) that in the end, how can you compete with a greater love and a greater relationship. She said there was nothing wrong with Nick, but ultimately she fell in love with Josh and had a greater relationship with him.
That is the perfect answer. She admitted she cared for him and had feelings for him. She admitted the things she said on the show were true. She finally admitted she made a mistake and should have told him sooner, but she fell in love with Josh. She was honest. Not sure what else anyone could have expected her to say. Hell, even after Nick told millions of people, including her friends, her family and Josh's family that Nick had sex with her, what was her reply after talking about how it should have been kept private? She said she respected Nick and the relationship they had together and she even goes further into stating how she meant everything she said about him. If that was me, I wouldn't have been so respectful in that situation. If my ex boyfriend, who I dated for two years (not 10 weeks like Nick) did something similar to me just to my friends and family, I would have lost it on him if he ever told anyone what we did or didn't do behind closed doors.
I can see debating whether or not Andi handled the intial breakup well, but the ATFR? She couldn't have responded more perfectly. Plus there's something called editing. Very possible, like other haves suggested, that we didn't see all of the break up.
I really just think Nick got it in his head that she was going to "pull a Mesnick" and anything else Andi said that night to him wasn't going to be enough. He got upset, angry, hurt, what have you when she said she was never in love with him. His response was to hurt her the way she hurt him. It's as simple as that for me.
I couldn't have said this any better; in fact I don't think I could have said it near as well.
I do agree with you that Nick was hoping for or even expecting a Mesnick and when he realized that wasn't going to happen, he seemed to get mad (did anyone besides me see his hands shaking after she said she had found a greater love?) or at least very emotional and that was when he asked the question. I can't argue that he wasn't hurt because I think he was, but IMHO the solution for hurt isn't to hurt back.
I agree with both of you. I was feeling sorry for Nick ( ATFR) but when, suddenly, he was quiet for a minute or so then he said " if you don't love me..." I just knew what he was going to say and I am like, " No! No! don't say it.. " but HE said it anyway. Darn! You don't know how many times I watched ATFR again, I still think that he did it deliberately.
Nick reminds me of my younger brother. When we were little (I was quite naughty!) if he couldn't get something from me, he'd threaten me with " I'm going to tell Mom ..."
I've been thinking about Cari's revelation of Nick's tweet -- the song "Shout" and the meaning of the lyrics..., very interesting to say the least.
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
timfan wrote:Maybe when interviewers stop asking about nick then she will let it go she does not bring him up the people who do the interviews do
I think as soon as she just says she is happy and stops making her little cute comments about Josh bashing Nick's head in and that he rhymes with a body part, they probably will. It is only interesting to ask the question because she is reacting to it.
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
stuckinsc wrote:Lucas15 wrote:Ash2214 wrote:Andi couldn't get the right words at the ATFR?
Before he even threw out the sex bomb, Andi gave the perfect answer. When CH asked if she ever loved Nick, Andi gave the perfect reply. She stated she had feelings for Nick. She knew that if she were to do this whole process all over again, she would still have the same relationship with Nick that she did the first time. She told him she meant everything she said about him. She said she meant it when she said he made her feel like a woman. She enjoyed getting to know him, but in the end (she also admitted her mistake) she said that she probably should have just said this earlier (probably meaning the initial break up) that in the end, how can you compete with a greater love and a greater relationship. She said there was nothing wrong with Nick, but ultimately she fell in love with Josh and had a greater relationship with him.
That is the perfect answer. She admitted she cared for him and had feelings for him. She admitted the things she said on the show were true. She finally admitted she made a mistake and should have told him sooner, but she fell in love with Josh. She was honest. Not sure what else anyone could have expected her to say. Hell, even after Nick told millions of people, including her friends, her family and Josh's family that Nick had sex with her, what was her reply after talking about how it should have been kept private? She said she respected Nick and the relationship they had together and she even goes further into stating how she meant everything she said about him. If that was me, I wouldn't have been so respectful in that situation. If my ex boyfriend, who I dated for two years (not 10 weeks like Nick) did something similar to me just to my friends and family, I would have lost it on him if he ever told anyone what we did or didn't do behind closed doors.
I can see debating whether or not Andi handled the intial breakup well, but the ATFR? She couldn't have responded more perfectly. Plus there's something called editing. Very possible, like other haves suggested, that we didn't see all of the break up.
I really just think Nick got it in his head that she was going to "pull a Mesnick" and anything else Andi said that night to him wasn't going to be enough. He got upset, angry, hurt, what have you when she said she was never in love with him. His response was to hurt her the way she hurt him. It's as simple as that for me.
I couldn't have said this any better; in fact I don't think I could have said it near as well.
I do agree with you that Nick was hoping for or even expecting a Mesnick and when he realized that wasn't going to happen, he seemed to get mad (did anyone besides me see his hands shaking after she said she had found a greater love?) or at least very emotional and that was when he asked the question. I can't argue that he wasn't hurt because I think he was, but IMHO the solution for hurt isn't to hurt back.
You are right the solution for hurt isn't to hurt back. He made a mistake. He has said he didn't mean to hurt her and regrets the hurt.
Her response three weeks later? Still trying to hurt him. Maybe Andi needs to hear your words too. Nick has stopped talking about Andi, maybe one day soon she will do the same.
Are you Nick's friend? Do you spend time with him? How do you know what he is saying behind closed doors? We don't have the slightest clue about what he still thinks of Andi and Josh because he isn't doing interviews. Andi and Josh don't mention or bring up Nick unless they are asked in interviews. Also, when you weight each others words, telling millions of people that you had sex with the lead is far heavier than telling a local radio station host that Nick's name rhymed with a body part.
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
stuckinsc wrote:timfan wrote:Maybe when interviewers stop asking about nick then she will let it go she does not bring him up the people who do the interviews do
I think as soon as she just says she is happy and stops making her little cute comments about Josh bashing Nick's head in and that he rhymes with a body part, they probably will. It is only interesting to ask the question because she is reacting to it.
Right.. That's exactly why radio hosts are asking her. Please. It's because Nick did what no other contestant has ever really done. It's a hot topic for numerous reasons. People want to hear about it.
Ash2214- Posts : 7195
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
Ash2214 wrote:stuckinsc wrote:timfan wrote:Maybe when interviewers stop asking about nick then she will let it go she does not bring him up the people who do the interviews do
I think as soon as she just says she is happy and stops making her little cute comments about Josh bashing Nick's head in and that he rhymes with a body part, they probably will. It is only interesting to ask the question because she is reacting to it.
Right.. That's exactly why radio hosts are asking her. Please. It's because Nick did what no other contestant has ever really done. It's a hot topic for numerous reasons. People want to hear about it.
Yup he chose to open a door that is going to take a while to close. He provided red meat to interviewers that will be gnawed over for a while. Hey we've all said things we probably regret in hindsight; we just didn't do it on national tv!
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
Ash2214 wrote:Andi couldn't get the right words at the ATFR?
Before he even threw out the sex bomb, Andi gave the perfect answer. When CH asked if she ever loved Nick, Andi gave the perfect reply. She stated she had feelings for Nick. She knew that if she were to do this whole process all over again, she would still have the same relationship with Nick that she did the first time. She told him she meant everything she said about him. She said she meant it when she said he made her feel like a woman. She enjoyed getting to know him, but in the end (she also admitted her mistake) she said that she probably should have just said this earlier (probably meaning the initial break up) that in the end, how can you compete with a greater love and a greater relationship. She said there was nothing wrong with Nick, but ultimately she fell in love with Josh and had a greater relationship with him.
That is the perfect answer. She admitted she cared for him and had feelings for him. She admitted the things she said on the show were true. She finally admitted she made a mistake and should have told him sooner, but she fell in love with Josh. She was honest. Not sure what else anyone could have expected her to say. Hell, even after Nick told millions of people, including her friends, her family and Josh's family that Nick had sex with her, what was her reply after talking about how it should have been kept private? She said she respected Nick and the relationship they had together and she even goes further into stating how she meant everything she said about him. If that was me, I wouldn't have been so respectful in that situation. If my ex boyfriend, who I dated for two years (not 10 weeks like Nick) did something similar to me just to my friends and family, I would have lost it on him if he ever told anyone what we did or didn't do behind closed doors.
I can see debating whether or not Andi handled the intial breakup well, but the ATFR? She couldn't have responded more perfectly. Plus there's something called editing. Very possible, like other haves suggested, that we didn't see all of the break up.
I really just think Nick got it in his head that she was going to "pull a Mesnick" and anything else Andi said that night to him wasn't going to be enough. He got upset, angry, hurt, what have you when she said she was never in love with him. His response was to hurt her the way she hurt him. It's as simple as that for me.
No, the things I bolded are things Andi said after Nick "dropped the bomb". She didn't say anything about her feelings for him prior to that, just that she wasn't in love with him, but they had a great relationship, and there was nothing wrong with their relationship, just something else was more right. I would like her to define a great relationship, because I don't think a relationship where the two parties aren't on the same page or even chapter is all that great, not to mention how it contradicts what she said to him while breaking up with him. She said a life with him would be her overanalyzing every single thing, yet there was nothing wrong with the relationship? Just confirms that those things she said in DR were excuses. Nick knew they were, because she'd told him repeatedly how easy it was to be with him. The awkwardness of the last date was mostly due to Nick sensing she was pulling back and needing reassurance because of it. I just don't get why she even bothered with that date, since in interviews she has said she realized it was Josh during their FD. Why make Nick meet her parents and have that last date with him if she already knew it was Josh? Makes the whole "I respected you enough to let you go mere hours before the FRC" seem a bit hollow. That was just another excuse anyway, because no lead wants to deal with a breakup right before getting engaged, if they can help it. Perhaps she was determined to do it the old-fashioned way and keep both suitors around until the very end, since Des let Drew go so early and JP wouldn't propose, but it sure as hell wasn't considerate towards Nick.
I don't think Nick expected a Mesnick, he's not stupid. Maybe he had a tiny glimmer of hope still, but I truly think he just needed to hear he didn't get totally played, and she didn't acknowledge any feelings towards him until after he'd brought up the FS.
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
Sable wrote:She really gave him no answers as to why she was letting him go. She stole his line that she woke up that morning and something didn't feel right, and then she tried to put the blame on him for being too analytical. She had much more compassion and gave better explanations to the men she let go in earlier rose ceremonies than she did to Nick.
That's not quite how I interpret what she said. She started the conversation by saying:
We were talking and you told me that the last time you got engaged you woke up that morning and didn't feel that something was right. Well, this morning I woke up and I didn't feel that something was right. And I can't go through with something that I don't think is right ... the feeling of not right. It's not right, it's not what I envisioned. It's clear to me that the things I see in you, the things I see with us are ultimately not what I think is best for us.
Now this is actually a very good attempt at trying to help Nick to understand how she feels. It's not "stealing Nick's line" it's relating something that Nick told her he felt in an attempt to help him understand how she felt. It also shows that she has listened to him and the things he's said to her.
So then Nick asks her : When did you start feeling this? And she answers:
I mean I started feeling like knowing the intensity between us I felt that worry like that worry there being so much intensity and so much over analyzing, and then honestly like the last date I wanted to just have fun and wanted to relax and as hard as I tried I couldn't do that with you. It's like we both over analyze everything and I feel like a life with you would be me over analyzing every. single. moment. and ...
She does not shift the blame of over analyzing to Nick - she shares it with him "we both over analyze everything" and she fears her life with Nick would have "me over analyzing every. single. moment." She doesn't lay that blame off on Nick - she takes it on herself with the word "me".
Now I do agree - Nick didn't hear the answer, perhaps because it wasn't what he was expecting, perhaps because it wasn't what he wanted to hear - I really don't know. But it was Nick who sent this discussion sideways by pointing the blame figure back at Andi when he says:
When I told you I love you ... I don't know how you could look at me the way you did and (???) the way you did and be sitting here right now and ... and so when you looked at me sometimes and smiled at me sometimes I just took it that you meant it.
All of a sudden everything is Andi's fault and at this point there's no hope of achieving an understanding because Nick has just stopped listening to her. The reason she had better explanations to others is they listened; Nick didn't.
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
mindless wrote:Ash2214 wrote:Andi couldn't get the right words at the ATFR?
Before he even threw out the sex bomb, Andi gave the perfect answer. When CH asked if she ever loved Nick, Andi gave the perfect reply. She stated she had feelings for Nick. She knew that if she were to do this whole process all over again, she would still have the same relationship with Nick that she did the first time. She told him she meant everything she said about him. She said she meant it when she said he made her feel like a woman. She enjoyed getting to know him, but in the end (she also admitted her mistake) she said that she probably should have just said this earlier (probably meaning the initial break up) that in the end, how can you compete with a greater love and a greater relationship. She said there was nothing wrong with Nick, but ultimately she fell in love with Josh and had a greater relationship with him.
That is the perfect answer. She admitted she cared for him and had feelings for him. She admitted the things she said on the show were true. She finally admitted she made a mistake and should have told him sooner, but she fell in love with Josh. She was honest. Not sure what else anyone could have expected her to say. Hell, even after Nick told millions of people, including her friends, her family and Josh's family that Nick had sex with her, what was her reply after talking about how it should have been kept private? She said she respected Nick and the relationship they had together and she even goes further into stating how she meant everything she said about him. If that was me, I wouldn't have been so respectful in that situation. If my ex boyfriend, who I dated for two years (not 10 weeks like Nick) did something similar to me just to my friends and family, I would have lost it on him if he ever told anyone what we did or didn't do behind closed doors.
I can see debating whether or not Andi handled the intial breakup well, but the ATFR? She couldn't have responded more perfectly. Plus there's something called editing. Very possible, like other haves suggested, that we didn't see all of the break up.
I really just think Nick got it in his head that she was going to "pull a Mesnick" and anything else Andi said that night to him wasn't going to be enough. He got upset, angry, hurt, what have you when she said she was never in love with him. His response was to hurt her the way she hurt him. It's as simple as that for me.
No, the things I bolded are things Andi said after Nick "dropped the bomb". She didn't say anything about her feelings for him prior to that, just that she wasn't in love with him, but they had a great relationship, and there was nothing wrong with their relationship, just something else was more right. I would like her to define a great relationship, because I don't think a relationship where the two parties aren't on the same page or even chapter is all that great, not to mention how it contradicts what she said to him while breaking up with him. She said a life with him would be her overanalyzing every single thing, yet there was nothing wrong with the relationship? Just confirms that those things she said in DR were excuses. Nick knew they were, because she'd told him repeatedly how easy it was to be with him. The awkwardness of the last date was mostly due to Nick sensing she was pulling back and needing reassurance because of it. I just don't get why she even bothered with that date, since in interviews she has said she realized it was Josh during their FD. Why make Nick meet her parents and have that last date with him if she already knew it was Josh? Makes the whole "I respected you enough to let you go mere hours before the FRC" seem a bit hollow. That was just another excuse anyway, because no lead wants to deal with a breakup right before getting engaged, if they can help it. Perhaps she was determined to do it the old-fashioned way and keep both suitors around until the very end, since Des let Drew go so early and JP wouldn't propose, but it sure as hell wasn't considerate towards Nick.
I don't think Nick expected a Mesnick, he's not stupid. Maybe he had a tiny glimmer of hope still, but I truly think he just needed to hear he didn't get totally played, and she didn't acknowledge any feelings towards him until after he'd brought up the FS.
Bolding by me...
I so agree w/you. I really don't think Nick was looking for her to pull a Mesnick. I just think he was looking for closure so that he could move on.
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
mindless wrote:Ash2214 wrote:Andi couldn't get the right words at the ATFR?
Before he even threw out the sex bomb, Andi gave the perfect answer. When CH asked if she ever loved Nick, Andi gave the perfect reply. She stated she had feelings for Nick. She knew that if she were to do this whole process all over again, she would still have the same relationship with Nick that she did the first time. She told him she meant everything she said about him. She said she meant it when she said he made her feel like a woman. She enjoyed getting to know him, but in the end (she also admitted her mistake) she said that she probably should have just said this earlier (probably meaning the initial break up) that in the end, how can you compete with a greater love and a greater relationship. She said there was nothing wrong with Nick, but ultimately she fell in love with Josh and had a greater relationship with him.
That is the perfect answer. She admitted she cared for him and had feelings for him. She admitted the things she said on the show were true. She finally admitted she made a mistake and should have told him sooner, but she fell in love with Josh. She was honest. Not sure what else anyone could have expected her to say. Hell, even after Nick told millions of people, including her friends, her family and Josh's family that Nick had sex with her, what was her reply after talking about how it should have been kept private? She said she respected Nick and the relationship they had together and she even goes further into stating how she meant everything she said about him. If that was me, I wouldn't have been so respectful in that situation. If my ex boyfriend, who I dated for two years (not 10 weeks like Nick) did something similar to me just to my friends and family, I would have lost it on him if he ever told anyone what we did or didn't do behind closed doors.
I can see debating whether or not Andi handled the intial breakup well, but the ATFR? She couldn't have responded more perfectly. Plus there's something called editing. Very possible, like other haves suggested, that we didn't see all of the break up.
I really just think Nick got it in his head that she was going to "pull a Mesnick" and anything else Andi said that night to him wasn't going to be enough. He got upset, angry, hurt, what have you when she said she was never in love with him. His response was to hurt her the way she hurt him. It's as simple as that for me.
No, the things I bolded are things Andi said after Nick "dropped the bomb". She didn't say anything about her feelings for him prior to that, just that she wasn't in love with him, but they had a great relationship, and there was nothing wrong with their relationship, just something else was more right. I would like her to define a great relationship, because I don't think a relationship where the two parties aren't on the same page or even chapter is all that great, not to mention how it contradicts what she said to him while breaking up with him. She said a life with him would be her overanalyzing every single thing, yet there was nothing wrong with the relationship? Just confirms that those things she said in DR were excuses. Nick knew they were, because she'd told him repeatedly how easy it was to be with him. The awkwardness of the last date was mostly due to Nick sensing she was pulling back and needing reassurance because of it. I just don't get why she even bothered with that date, since in interviews she has said she realized it was Josh during their FD. Why make Nick meet her parents and have that last date with him if she already knew it was Josh? Makes the whole "I respected you enough to let you go mere hours before the FRC" seem a bit hollow. That was just another excuse anyway, because no lead wants to deal with a breakup right before getting engaged, if they can help it. Perhaps she was determined to do it the old-fashioned way and keep both suitors around until the very end, since Des let Drew go so early and JP wouldn't propose, but it sure as hell wasn't considerate towards Nick.
I don't think Nick expected a Mesnick, he's not stupid. Maybe he had a tiny glimmer of hope still, but I truly think he just needed to hear he didn't get totally played, and she didn't acknowledge any feelings towards him until after he'd brought up the FS.
I'm not sure if you watched the show before, but the lead has a job to do. Andi got paid to act because ultimately, she was in love with one guy, just like every other lead in every other season. There can only be one and along the way, people will end up hurt and it's usually the worst for the F2. It sucks, but it's the way it goes with this silly show. Andi is under contract and personally, I like that she didn't take Nick to the FRC and have him pick out a ring. That was one thing she had control over because production sure as hell wasn't going to have the final two episodes of the season be of just Josh and Andi. How dramatic!
Hmm. I would bet that writing a letter, essentially telling Andi she took the easy route in picking Josh and questioning her decision, explaining to her how much he loves her and how much he loved their relationship and then basically asking her for a second chance and asking her if she's thought about him pretty much means that Nick was at the very least hoping she would change her mind. He tried to track her down twice and when that didn't work, he had a letter be delivered to her two weeks before they were going to be face to face. He wanted a second chance and from the way he reacted when she told him she was never in love with him, well it seems pretty obvious to me that he thought it was a strong possibility.
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
Ash2214 wrote:stuckinsc wrote:Lucas15 wrote:
I couldn't have said this any better; in fact I don't think I could have said it near as well.
I do agree with you that Nick was hoping for or even expecting a Mesnick and when he realized that wasn't going to happen, he seemed to get mad (did anyone besides me see his hands shaking after she said she had found a greater love?) or at least very emotional and that was when he asked the question. I can't argue that he wasn't hurt because I think he was, but IMHO the solution for hurt isn't to hurt back.
You are right the solution for hurt isn't to hurt back. He made a mistake. He has said he didn't mean to hurt her and regrets the hurt.
Her response three weeks later? Still trying to hurt him. Maybe Andi needs to hear your words too. Nick has stopped talking about Andi, maybe one day soon she will do the same.
Are you Nick's friend? Do you spend time with him? How do you know what he is saying behind closed doors? We don't have the slightest clue about what he still thinks of Andi and Josh because he isn't doing interviews. Andi and Josh don't mention or bring up Nick unless they are asked in interviews. Also, when you weight each others words, telling millions of people that you had sex with the lead is far heavier than telling a local radio station host that Nick's name rhymed with a body part.
Nope, I just look at his twitter and IG. But what I do know is that Andi is speaking of Nick in public. How much is she doing in private, do we know?
Nick has not mentioned Andi for two weeks. He did only the media that he had to do after the show and a guest blog for Sean. Andi and Josh are the ones who keep doing media and then she keeps commenting on Nick. When she is asked.
Sorry, Nick's bad behavior as excuse for Andi's will eventually need to stop being the excuse.
People kept asking when Nick would go away and give up, he has. I am only asking for Andi to stop talking about Nick in turn.
I work for a university where we have had the awesome PETA come and and tape things in secret and misrepresent them. We are all instructed to answer any question with no comment. The question stops getting answered when they don't get an interesting answer. It is hard. I would like to tell them much more, how they should never take medicine if they don't believe in animal research and many other things. But that just extends the question, so I have to say no comment. So that is what we do.
I bet if Andi stopped making snippy, quippy little comments about Nick, the questions would stop being asked. It wouldn't be interesting or give the people cute little sound bites.
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
eirekay wrote:Lucas15 wrote:stuckinsc wrote:As for Andi, she knew her future mother-in-law was hosting a viewing party, so did she come out and try to be gentle and calm the situation? Knowing that whatever happened her MIL would see? Nope she came out very rigid and telling Nick that she never loved him and never said she did. Doesn't sound like the smart way to avoid having your MIL embarrassed in front of her friends.
This is a "damned if you do / damned if you don't" situation and every lead faces it. If you "please" one group of people by saying "it was love at first sight" then you offend everyone else who would think "if you knew all along why did you lead me on?". But if you say "Gee I was conflicted to the very end and finally picked XXX" then you offend the one you picked by making it seem like you really didn't have strong feelings for them ever and almost had to flip a coin at the end. You just can't win - all you can do is choose who is going to damn you.
Probably the best thing a lead can do is answer this situation in such a way as to best secure their future - by flattering the one you did pick and pleasing their family and friends because that's your future; the ones you will offend by doing this are your past. So to me Andi did exactly the smart thing to do because her MIL really doesn't care about Nick or anyone else on the show except her son and her son's fiancee.
I think a lead can answer "I took each relationship separately and tried to let myself experience all that each man had to offer. When I really looked into my heart, I knew that I loved F1 - that my feelings were deeper and stronger for him, even thought I cared deeply for F2 as well."
It's nice of us to say what should have been said. But in that moment when you have so many emotions running inside of you, it doesn't always flow and come out the way you would like. Sometimes the most honest remarks aren't wrapped tightly in a bow. We need to let Andi be human and allow her to make mistakes. She is not a PR person and therefore those perfect words did not come out spontaneously. Perhaps, we should have her get a PRO like Obama so that she would have scripted politically correct speeches/responses from now on. However, I do believe that what should be looked at is one's motive over one's action. If her motive was to harm him and make him feel like scum, then she's wrong, if she had pure moments, I say let's give her a break!
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Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread
Lucas15 wrote:Sable wrote:She really gave him no answers as to why she was letting him go. She stole his line that she woke up that morning and something didn't feel right, and then she tried to put the blame on him for being too analytical. She had much more compassion and gave better explanations to the men she let go in earlier rose ceremonies than she did to Nick.
That's not quite how I interpret what she said. She started the conversation by saying:We were talking and you told me that the last time you got engaged you woke up that morning and didn't feel that something was right. Well, this morning I woke up and I didn't feel that something was right. And I can't go through with something that I don't think is right ... the feeling of not right. It's not right, it's not what I envisioned. It's clear to me that the things I see in you, the things I see with us are ultimately not what I think is best for us.
Now this is actually a very good attempt at trying to help Nick to understand how she feels. It's not "stealing Nick's line" it's relating something that Nick told her he felt in an attempt to help him understand how she felt. It also shows that she has listened to him and the things he's said to her.
So then Nick asks her : When did you start feeling this? And she answers:I mean I started feeling like knowing the intensity between us I felt that worry like that worry there being so much intensity and so much over analyzing, and then honestly like the last date I wanted to just have fun and wanted to relax and as hard as I tried I couldn't do that with you. It's like we both over analyze everything and I feel like a life with you would be me over analyzing every. single. moment. and ...
She does not shift the blame of over analyzing to Nick - she shares it with him "we both over analyze everything" and she fears her life with Nick would have "me over analyzing every. single. moment." She doesn't lay that blame off on Nick - she takes it on herself with the word "me".
Now I do agree - Nick didn't hear the answer, perhaps because it wasn't what he was expecting, perhaps because it wasn't what he wanted to hear - I really don't know. But it was Nick who sent this discussion sideways by pointing the blame figure back at Andi when he says:When I told you I love you ... I don't know how you could look at me the way you did and (???) the way you did and be sitting here right now and ... and so when you looked at me sometimes and smiled at me sometimes I just took it that you meant it.
All of a sudden everything is Andi's fault and at this point there's no hope of achieving an understanding because Nick has just stopped listening to her. The reason she had better explanations to others is they listened; Nick didn't.
You said in a previous post that is went well, because they didn't question her. Which is it? They didn't question or they listened? I am just confused.
Truthfully, I really don't care. I like Nick. I used to really like Josh, now not so sure. Andi, I am not a fan. Maybe one day when she can handle someone disagreeing with her, I might agree, until then, I am not impressed.
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