Andi Dorfman - The Bachelorette 10 - Discussion

Sprite wrote:snipped..

We all have our own way of looking at things. I don't judge the women on this show any differently than I do the men. A jerk is a jerk, thoughtless and inconsiderate is thoughtless and inconsiderate, a drunk is a drunk, self absorbed is self absorbed, immature is immature, a pain in the a** is a pain in the a**...no matter the sex.

I don't dislike Andi because some consider her a strong woman. I am considered a strong woman! When I started working at my current location, there were several other women who were brought in at the same time and who were also considered strong women. Management thought we would kill each other. (Which begs the question why put us all together, but that is another matter.) Imagine the surprise when not only did we get along like a house on fire, but we became friends. Why? Because we respected one another. We all had a strong work ethic and nobody had to be told to do something because we all knew our jobs and actually did it. Yes, we could be goofy and do silly stuff...but, we would get business out of the way first. Respect was the key.

I don't respect Andi...and that has nothing to do with her sex. Just like I didn't respect Jake or Ben or Courtney. It didn't start at the AFTR. It started during JPab's season. Her attack on JPab to get herself the gig was over the top and pompous in my eyes. She then proceeded to be rude to Eric...a man who had been nothing but polite and was simply trying to discuss something with her. Her reaction to Dylan talking about his family tragedy continued her self absorption and then it was capped off with the dismissal of Nick post FS and at the AFTR. All of which screamed self absorbed, spoiled brat not getting her way. (The same goes for the others.) None of them liked being questioned. All of them were rude. All of them were self absorbed. All of them were self serving.

Does that mean that there is no good in any of them? That they can't change? No, however, thus far, I haven't seen much change in Andi. She...and Josh and her friend Kelly...continued to post some not so nice things post show. Not a lot, but it continues the pattern of behaviour I have seen thus far that has led me to my conclusions about her and thus, just reinforces the previous impression I had formed. I can't respect someone that acts like that...be they a he or a she.

whit90 wrote:

SueSt wrote:

nannymargie wrote:Well this has been a very interesting discussion.  One thing we call all agree on is that we will never agree on a lot of things.

I for 1 love Josh and Andi together.  I find they are a gorgeous couple and compliment each other.  I could never warm up to Nick because most of the time he couldn't look Andi in the face when talking to her.  He just came off creepy to me.  Maybe he was shy in front of the cameras or whatever but something was just not right to me.  But do I think Nick is a bad guy, hell no.  I just didn't think he was right for Andi. None of them are perfect and have made mistakes I wish they could take back.  But that is not the case and they can only move on with their lives.

I have to admire Andi for telling Josh the truth about what went down with Nick knowing he could walk away after she told him.  She could have kept quiet about it  thinking it would never come out that she slept with Nick.  But it seems she did not want to start their relationship with any secrets and it's a good thing she did.  CH said that after Nick left the stage that Andi told him she was so glad she was completely honest with Josh.  To me that took a lot of guts not knowing how Josh would take that information.

Thanks for your comments Nanny.  And yes, it has been interesting.

I could never warm up to Josh because to me he seems like a plastic prince, too surface and too emotional.  The conversations with Andi were all emotion, no depth, no real tension, just arguing.  I personally would not last a minute with him, but I could see that she was drawn to him absolutely; he was her ‘type.’  

What I saw with Nick was a significantly deeper connection, one that, as he stated, was uniquely special.  And I did see them observing each other in a sort of askew manner, as you describe, but to me it was like two jungle animals sniffing each other out, trying to understand each other, like a mating call and it was very very exciting to watch and delivered real sexual tension for me, the viewer.  

I think Nick is extremely handsome, better looking, more real than Josh…. But again, to each his own.  I still think Nick would be a great fit for Andi and in an alternative reality, had they wound up together, she would have had a very different life.  She made her choice and theoretically I wish her well, but if I’m being honest… well, let’s just leave it at that….

I don’t admire Andi for telling Josh the truth at all… frankly, I don’t think she had much choice.   I would have admired Josh for dumping her actually, but alas it was not to be…

I agree with your post and yes I feel Nick is the real deal and whoever ends up with him is one lucky lady . I also felt the same about Josh not my type at all.  I feel like he has this arrogance  to him that he is better than others .
The only thing I differ from your post is that Nick would of been a great fit for Andi. IMO he deserves someone so much better than what Andi is. He needs someone who is compassionate , loving, and has a great heart. I do not see those qualities in Andi so I am glad that she did pick Josh .

GuardianAngel wrote:

Sprite wrote:snipped..

We all have our own way of looking at things. I don't judge the women on this show any differently than I do the men. A jerk is a jerk, thoughtless and inconsiderate is thoughtless and inconsiderate, a drunk is a drunk, self absorbed is self absorbed, immature is immature, a pain in the a** is a pain in the a**...no matter the sex.

I don't dislike Andi because some consider her a strong woman. I am considered a strong woman! When I started working at my current location, there were several other women who were brought in at the same time and who were also considered strong women. Management thought we would kill each other. (Which begs the question why put us all together, but that is another matter.) Imagine the surprise when not only did we get along like a house on fire, but we became friends. Why? Because we respected one another. We all had a strong work ethic and nobody had to be told to do something because we all knew our jobs and actually did it. Yes, we could be goofy and do silly stuff...but, we would get business out of the way first. Respect was the key.

I don't respect Andi...and that has nothing to do with her sex. Just like I didn't respect Jake or Ben or Courtney. It didn't start at the AFTR. It started during JPab's season. Her attack on JPab to get herself the gig was over the top and pompous in my eyes. She then proceeded to be rude to Eric...a man who had been nothing but polite and was simply trying to discuss something with her. Her reaction to Dylan talking about his family tragedy continued her self absorption and then it was capped off with the dismissal of Nick post FS and at the AFTR. All of which screamed self absorbed, spoiled brat not getting her way. (The same goes for the others.) None of them liked being questioned. All of them were rude. All of them were self absorbed. All of them were self serving.

Does that mean that there is no good in any of them? That they can't change? No, however, thus far, I haven't seen much change in Andi. She...and Josh and her friend Kelly...continued to post some not so nice things post show. Not a lot, but it continues the pattern of behaviour I have seen thus far that has led me to my conclusions about her and thus, just reinforces the previous impression I had formed. I can't respect someone that acts like that...be they a he or a she.

Great post Sprite. Well said. Being brought to F3 on JPG's season was a joke, and clearly producer driven. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, but it just got worse. It's her way or no way, no one's opinion seemed to matter. She has the ability to turn a situation around and take the focus away from her, and make it your problem.

IMO it's a form of insecurity. The need to be right, to be hard nosed as she has many times displayed that side of her, in some sort of strange way does it make her feel superior? IDK but she needs to loose the attitude. She launched her TShirt, and responded to comments, by saying she didn't know Love would bring so much anger, paraphrasing. Why in the world respond to negative posts when you're launching your new design? That was her way of turning the situation around, and having all the fans stick up for her and tell her how much they love her. It worked.

There are some pics of her that IMO are another indication of her insecurity. She makes a point of showing her ring, where it almost looks like a forced pose. The most recent where she has her legs open and against Josh's leg as if she's putting her mark on him. In a strong trusting relationship, there's no need to show ownership or throw a tantrum because more fans want pics with him than her.

I realize they have fans, but there are others who don't like them, no different than all the others before them. Once the next Bachelorette is announced, we will start all over again.

nannymargie wrote:SueSt,  It's funny how we all see things different, but that is what makes the world go round.  Love your comment about 2 animals sniffing each other.  Made me laugh out loud. Of course you know I did not see it like that.  

Josh is more my type  (tall, dark and handsome) so I guess that's why I couldn't warm up to Nick.  One thing I did not like is that it always looked like Nick had a tablecloth around his neck.   I know some people liked it but I didn't.

I didn't see a deeper connection with Nick and there were deeper conversations with Josh.  But we were only allowed to see what TPTB allowed us to.  So there is so much more to these relationships that were left on the cutting room floor.

GuardianAngel wrote:

Sprite wrote:snipped..

We all have our own way of looking at things. I don't judge the women on this show any differently than I do the men. A jerk is a jerk, thoughtless and inconsiderate is thoughtless and inconsiderate, a drunk is a drunk, self absorbed is self absorbed, immature is immature, a pain in the a** is a pain in the a**...no matter the sex.

I don't dislike Andi because some consider her a strong woman. I am considered a strong woman! When I started working at my current location, there were several other women who were brought in at the same time and who were also considered strong women. Management thought we would kill each other. (Which begs the question why put us all together, but that is another matter.) Imagine the surprise when not only did we get along like a house on fire, but we became friends. Why? Because we respected one another. We all had a strong work ethic and nobody had to be told to do something because we all knew our jobs and actually did it. Yes, we could be goofy and do silly stuff...but, we would get business out of the way first. Respect was the key.

I don't respect Andi...and that has nothing to do with her sex. Just like I didn't respect Jake or Ben or Courtney. It didn't start at the AFTR. It started during JPab's season. Her attack on JPab to get herself the gig was over the top and pompous in my eyes. She then proceeded to be rude to Eric...a man who had been nothing but polite and was simply trying to discuss something with her. Her reaction to Dylan talking about his family tragedy continued her self absorption and then it was capped off with the dismissal of Nick post FS and at the AFTR. All of which screamed self absorbed, spoiled brat not getting her way. (The same goes for the others.) None of them liked being questioned. All of them were rude. All of them were self absorbed. All of them were self serving.

Does that mean that there is no good in any of them? That they can't change? No, however, thus far, I haven't seen much change in Andi. She...and Josh and her friend Kelly...continued to post some not so nice things post show. Not a lot, but it continues the pattern of behaviour I have seen thus far that has led me to my conclusions about her and thus, just reinforces the previous impression I had formed. I can't respect someone that acts like that...be they a he or a she.

Great post Sprite. Well said. Being brought to F3 on JPG's season was a joke, and clearly producer driven. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, but it just got worse. It's her way or no way, no one's opinion seemed to matter. She has the ability to turn a situation around and take the focus away from her, and make it your problem.

IMO it's a form of insecurity. The need to be right, to be hard nosed as she has many times displayed that side of her, in some sort of strange way does it make her feel superior? IDK but she needs to loose the attitude. She launched her TShirt, and responded to comments, by saying she didn't know Love would bring so much anger, paraphrasing. Why in the world respond to negative posts when you're launching your new design? That was her way of turning the situation around, and having all the fans stick up for her and tell her how much they love her. It worked.

There are some pics of her that IMO are another indication of her insecurity. She makes a point of showing her ring, where it almost looks like a forced pose. The most recent where she has her legs open and against Josh's leg as if she's putting her mark on him. In a strong trusting relationship, there's no need to show ownership or throw a tantrum because more fans want pics with him than her.

I realize they have fans, but there are others who don't like them, no different than all the others before them. Once the next Bachelorette is announced, we will start all over again.

Ash2214 wrote:

vivi2 wrote:
I never rolled my eyes when I was younger, only after being married for almost 40 years, I RMY at my hubs like all the time! Does that mean I'm immature?  

Personally, I think Nick was lucky that Andi didn't do much more than just an eye roll. I'd not have been so nice after that icky bomb, seriously!

the worst part is that he knew he was going to share with millions that she had sex with him, which would lead to her receiving many degrading comments and that fact just makes my skin crawl. Not a man in my eyes. Surprisingly I 100% agreed with Juan Pablo on that issue.

Ash2214 wrote:In all seriousness, I would love to see how others would react to a man pulling you aside and stating to you that you were an actress. I would love to see what others would do if a man they dumped was trying to speak to you, was posting love pictures of you two together on social media, wrote you a letter saying you made a mistake and he wanted a second chance, and then proceeded to tell millions of people you had sex with him all while you were engaged to another man. Seriously. I would love to know how people would handle that. No one is perfect and I highly, highly doubt every other person would handle those situations all with rainbows and butterflies.

It's been over a half year since all of this went down and besides a couple of tweets that were done within days of the ATFR airing and Josh's comments about Juan Pablo, they've moved on and have seemingly been living a normal life down in Atlanta.

I also want to add this since I've seen this a lot today - I don't think a single person here has stated Andi is a saint and was not in the least bit guilty of making mistakes. She made mistakes and could have handled things better, but Eric (bless his heart) could have approached that situation differently and Nick could have too. It's a stupid, silly and 20% real television show with people  that are essentially playing one giant game with cameras in their faces. For me, it's hard to have this much hate or dislike for people from this show. In reality, they're all dumb for singing up to be on it in the first place and cheers to those tha actually make a relationship out of it.

Ash2214 wrote:

vivi2 wrote:
I never rolled my eyes when I was younger, only after being married for almost 40 years, I RMY at my hubs like all the time! Does that mean I'm immature?  

Personally, I think Nick was lucky that Andi didn't do much more than just an eye roll. I'd not have been so nice after that icky bomb, seriously!

the worst part is that he knew he was going to share with millions that she had sex with him, which would lead to her receiving many degrading comments and that fact just makes my skin crawl. Not a man in my eyes. Surprisingly I 100% agreed with Juan Pablo on that issue.

Ash2214 wrote:^ Do you really think as he said those words he didn't think about the repercussions of them getting out? He himself said in interviews it was the one question he thought about asking her since he was let go.