Re: Brooks Forester - Bachelorette 9 - Fan Thread - Discussion #4

[nannymargie]

Maybe it's as simple as "Out of sight, out of mind" or "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."  If he's not missing her terribly and thinking about her constantly when he's not with her, then it's not hurting him enough to be away from her. Maybe it's the yearning so much for someone, that it hurts.  I don't know if what his sister Jana was telling him just reinforced what he may have thought before, or if that was some new thing for him to consider when trying to figure out his feelings.  

I bet he missed her after he left.  He said in his PI that he missed those moments they had together and missed them a lot.  Then he said I guess it's really good by.  Well DUH isn't that what you wanted.  After she said she loved him, I think he regretted the breaking up.

There was just so many things he liked about Des and he said it was rare to find in anybody.  Wonder if he will ever find that again?

I sure hope so!  I think he was definitely surprised when she told him she loved him, and do believe he was having some regrets about breaking up but no matter what he may have felt in his heart, he didn't display wishy washy behavior.  He did leave, and once he did that, I think he'd protect both himself and her afterward by not saying anything that would be contrary to that.  He was surprised at the ATFR when he found out she was engaged to Chris, he admitted it, but also remained resolved to wish them both well, and not say anything to throw a monkey wrench into the equation.  What good would that do, and it was 3 months later.  I think TPTB definitely wanted to have the chance at a reaction because they sequestered him from watching the finale part 2 but not Drew.  I'm so happy he was gracious and supportive, and didn't make a fool of himself no matter what was going on inside with his head and heart.  

Nice avi, wink, wink!

That was pretty hateful of them not to let Brooks see the final episode just to see how he would react.  I am glad Brooks stayed classy to the end.   Also he even gave Des an out by saying he was not surprised because he saw the way she looked at Chris in groups and rose ceremony.  She was always looking at Brooks because most of the time Brooks and Chris were standing close to each other.

He did look surprised and was nervous about what had happened because he even said it.  I wonder if at that moment he wished it was him.

I still saw so much chemistry between them, she was touching his arm and laughing.  She had to try not to let the tears flow.  You could see it in her face.  He is such a great guy that he even stopped following her on twitter which I am sure was in respect for Chris.  But its not hard to see what they post without following.

[nannymargie]

I'm like Rolly, not an instagram user, so when I click on the link, it wants me to sign in.

Piper it's not hard to sign up for instagram.  I have it just to see what pictures are being posted but I do not put any pictures myself.

[Piper61]

I think the issue for most is not WHO she chose, but disbelief THAT she chose anyone at all after what we witnessed between Des and Brooks in Antigua.  Much less, accepted a proposal from Chris a couple of days later.  It wasn't just that she told Brooks that she loved him, but that when she was with the other guys she was thinking about him and wishing she could be with him instead of the other guys.  Kinda a slap in the face for the guy that she accepted a proposal from.  People find it hard to believe that she could flip a switch like that in just a few days and yes, that would make him a default in their minds.  Maybe they have worked things out and they are in love now.  If that's the case then I'm very happy for them.  Under the circumstances though, that proposal was a little tough to take.  

I've been having a tough time with this one as well. I said there should be no proposals from Brooks or Chris after part 1. I think TPTB told her she could not tell Chris that Drew was gone. I think the quote in the journal "not where we are now.. but where we we are going" tells us Chris knew about Brooks and wanted to propose anyway (why?) TPTB were going to have a rose ceremony. She had 2 choices: Let him propose (tell him we'll date) thus rejecting and disappointing him or accept.  I think she went on his confidence, not hers that day. That's my take and I so wish we had a discussion thread to discuss this together. I am not willing to re-write what actually happened. She was crying AFTER the FD with Chris. I do think they seem happy now.

 I agree with you both. As she was waiting for Brooks before their date, she was saying how if Brooks were to get down on one knee and propose she would say "yes." This was after her FDs with Chris and Drew. It was consistent with what we saw of where her heart was and where her head was in thinking about Brooks over the two other guys. Her feelings for him always seemed to be ahead of those two. Certainly she demonstrated that really quickly with Drew, letting him go before an FRC. She had to choose between Chris and Drew, I don't think there was ever a question who would remain in that scenario. It was always seemingly going to be Brooks, and one of them.

[nannymargie]

I think the issue for most is not WHO she chose, but disbelief THAT she chose anyone at all after what we witnessed between Des and Brooks in Antigua.  Much less, accepted a proposal from Chris a couple of days later.  It wasn't just that she told Brooks that she loved him, but that when she was with the other guys she was thinking about him and wishing she could be with him instead of the other guys.  Kinda a slap in the face for the guy that she accepted a proposal from.  People find it hard to believe that she could flip a switch like that in just a few days and yes, that would make him a default in their minds.  Maybe they have worked things out and they are in love now.  If that's the case then I'm very happy for them.  Under the circumstances though, that proposal was a little tough to take.  

I've been having a tough time with this one as well. I said there should be no proposals from Brooks or Chris after part 1. I think TPTB told her she could not tell Chris that Drew was gone. I think the quote in the journal "not where we are now.. but where we we are going" tells us Chris knew about Brooks and wanted to propose anyway (why?) TPTB were going to have a rose ceremony. She had 2 choices: Let him propose (tell him we'll date) thus rejecting and disappointing him or accept.  I think she went on his confidence, not hers that day. That's my take and I so wish we had a discussion thread to discuss this together. I am not willing to re-write what actually happened. She was crying AFTER the FD with Chris. I do think they seem happy now.

You right this is the only thread we have and we still have some discussing to do. They do seem happy now but I wonder how it will be after the move. She loves the beach and Seattle is rainy a lot. Time will tell.

[lorijbaker]

I don't post often, but like to follow along.  I was a huge fan of Brooks, and SO disasppointed when the spoilers were not true this year.  I did like Chris and he seems like a great guy but it was very obvious how much Desiree had fallen for Brooks.  I posted an article today on my facebook from this thread and got some comments from a friend who I had NO idea but she is a first cousin of Brooks.  She said that Brooks is a wonderful nice guy just like he came across to his fans here and that it was truly so painful to do what he did, but he had to because he didn't care deep enough for Des to last a lifetime.  She said that the show is so about the edits and very taxing and draining on everyone involved, for instance...the hometown visit that we saw with Brooks family took 18 hours to film.  Every person was miced and filmed all day long and they didn't leave until 2:00 a.m. until they felt they had the RIGHT personal chat.  Just thought you might enjoy that information.  I did.

[nannymargie]

I don't post often, but like to follow along.  I was a huge fan of Brooks, and SO disasppointed when the spoilers were not true this year.  I did like Chris and he seems like a great guy but it was very obvious how much Desiree had fallen for Brooks.  I posted an article today on my facebook from this thread and got some comments from a friend who I had NO idea but she is a first cousin of Brooks.  She said that  Brooks is a wonderful nice guy just like he came across to his fans here and that it was truly so painful to do what he did, but he had to because he didn't care deep enough for Des to last a lifetime.  She said that the show is so about the edits and very taxing and draining on everyone involved, for instance...the hometown visit that we saw with Brooks family took 18 hours to film.  Every person was miced and filmed all day long and they didn't leave until 2:00 a.m. until they felt they had the RIGHT personal chat.  Just thought you might enjoy that information.  I did.

Thanks so much for giving us this information. I think we all saw Brooks was true to himself thru out everything.

[atem]

There's a reason Elan tweeted what he did. I am glad Elan reached out and told the truth.

[Rolly]

I can't imagine the emotional wreck she must have been that week. Brooks, the man she would marry if he got down on one knee, dumps her, she goes thru a rose ceremony having to tell Chris and Drew that Brooks left, she goes on a date with Drew deciding she needs to dump him (remembering how devastating it feels to be the one being dumped), then she goes on her date with Chris and introduces him to her family, and then to top it off before she accepts Chris' proposal tells Chris she was in love with Brooks. Yikes, pour me a glass of wine!!!  

I honestly don't think she saw much of a choice except to go with the one that loved her even if she knew it was settling. Sean let her go, Brooks left her, she probably felt humiliated leaving after all she had been through without someone. Chris wouldn't leave her even knowing she loved Brooks. I think she probably felt so unloved after Brooks left, having Chris be so in love with her was her ticket out not empty handed.

Love is a strange thing and there are so many different types of love. Brooks was the fireworks, passion, truly, deeply, madly love. Chris is the quite, soft, loyal love. People marry for many reasons often with a lot less than Chris and Des have. I love this saying...

"Sometimes love isn't fireworks, sometimes love just comes softly."

I wanted for this to end with Brooks realizing that he did love Des but that the love didn't need to be painful but could come softly.

Somewhat off the topic but something Des says that seems totally wrong about ATFR was "I feel like in Antigua we (Brooks and Des) were so honest with each other that that was the closure we both needed". Looking at the two of them,and this is JMO, I think there are things between them unresolved. I wish we could have seen them alone without cameras, there probably would have been a few more questions.

[atem]

I'm like Rolly, not an instagram user, so when I click on the link, it wants me to sign in.

Piper it's not hard to sign up for instagram.  I have it just to see what pictures are being posted but I do not put any pictures myself.

That's one thing I don't like is signing up for yet again for something I don't use.

There's another way to see Instagrams without signing up.  I will post the link.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Just put brooksaforester and click on it and it shows it without signing up.

Oh, and he looks so dang good! Reminds me of the guy that will be on Ravenswood.

[Piper61]

I don't post often, but like to follow along.  I was a huge fan of Brooks, and SO disasppointed when the spoilers were not true this year.  I did like Chris and he seems like a great guy but it was very obvious how much Desiree had fallen for Brooks.  I posted an article today on my facebook from this thread and got some comments from a friend who I had NO idea but she is a first cousin of Brooks.  She said that  Brooks is a wonderful nice guy just like he came across to his fans here and that it was truly so painful to do what he did, but he had to because he didn't care deep enough for Des to last a lifetime.  She said that the show is so about the edits and very taxing and draining on everyone involved, for instance...the hometown visit that we saw with Brooks family took 18 hours to film.  Every person was miced and filmed all day long and they didn't leave until 2:00 a.m. until they felt they had the RIGHT personal chat.  Just thought you might enjoy that information.  I did.

Thanks for sharing that information! I bet the families think, we didn't sign up for this! What a long day. I was very disappointed in the end, but am happy that Brooks did the right thing for him and stayed true to his convictions because it would have been so awful to go the distance feeling like that. It was the hardest but kindest thing he could do for Des.

[Piper61]

I'm like Rolly, not an instagram user, so when I click on the link, it wants me to sign in.

Piper it's not hard to sign up for instagram.  I have it just to see what pictures are being posted but I do not put any pictures myself.

That's one thing I don't like is signing up for yet again for something I don't use.

There's another way to see Instagrams without signing up.  I will post the link.

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

Just put brooksaforester and click on it and it shows it without signing up.

Oh, and he looks so dang good! Reminds me of the guy that will be on Ravenswood.

Just saw this from both of you. Thanks for the info! Going to check it out later...because now it's preseason football time! :cutesmile!: 

[atem]

Although I can see Brooks' instagram pics without signing up on instagram, I can't see who he's now following. He added two new ones, who are they?

[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

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