Re: ATFR (Live) - 8/05 - Bachelorette 9 - Discussion and Spoilers

by brittany4400 Tue Aug 06, 2013 6:42 pm

mercieme wrote:
Swissmiss wrote:
sfrank wrote:
nd4reality wrote:I'm not going to watch Des and Chris on the talk show circuit but could one of you please summarise what Chris has been saying when asked about Des and Brooks ? TIA

Its sad nd4...just that he has not seen the breakup because he and Des talked about and thought it would be best. But I am sure he has seen clips by now and the barrage of questions have made him curious. Something tells me after the interviews today he'll be going home to sneak a peek at what went down.

I might be crazy but I think I would have more issue with the fantasy suite. If I proposed to somebody who slept with two other people the week before that would bother me more. I have read many of your posts over the seasons who day that is the norm.

I also think Chris is mature and by all the crying that went on last night knew there were feelings for Brooks. I also think he is confident enough in what they have. Shooting ended two months ago and I think she is honest enough to share. She knows darn well he can find it. I also thing moving this weekend and ending this media circus shows the level of maturity and the depth. She said she always fell for the wrong guys and was afraid of doing it again. While he is not my type he is secure in his own skin and does provide her with the security she needs. Heck, the guy got through a conversation/grilling with brother Nate. I am not going to second guess her and wish them the best as only they know what really happened. We saw the edit. I would have supported her no matter who she picked as she is a grown woman and we were not there. We just watched the TV production. Big difference!

Thanks Swissmiss, totally second what you wrote....all opinions are welcome but folks should remember this saying, "if you put people down, it means you are already below them". Only time will tell with Des and Chris, they have about the same chance as surviving as the past couples that have come out from this show, and if they do, it's kudos to them for making it work, afterall it's their lives and no onle else's.

I agree! I think chris is wise beyond his yrs! He is not avoiding what happened with brooks because he is in denial rather he knows it serves no purpose for is future with des! She told him right after his proposal " I promise to tell you everything" so I'm sure he already knows what went down! That's why I think chris and des will make it. Chris is a rock, he's solid, steady, and confident in what they have now and for their future!

by Goldie2 Tue Aug 06, 2013 6:45 pm

sfrank wrote:
GuardianAngel wrote:

@AliFedotowsky 16h
.@chrisbharrison you just said we've "never faced this on the show" Did you watch my season ;) #gettherose #samethinghappened #Bachelorette

After her Oscar performance when Frank left, no one thought she chose anyone. We all know what happened after that.

Chris might also wanna dig out the old VHS of Jen Scheft's season because she ended up with no one.

Well , technically Jen S. accepted the proposal and then they spent Thanksgiving together in which she had a "change of heart" - and then they reshot the ending ...

by sopearl Tue Aug 06, 2013 7:13 pm

The good news is: next season when RS announces the winner, we can sleuth away without thinking it's a waste of time.

by pbmax Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:04 pm

Beeleever wrote:I've been holding back (imagine that) but here goes:

I don't believe for one minute that Des can feel total devastation one day, and say:

~I love you and you're the only one I can say that to.
~I don't care that you just broke my heart, I love you.
~I was conflicted because I didn't want to share my heart. I wanted to give it to you.
~When I was going on dates I wanted to go on dates with you, that's why I was conflicted.
~This sucks. I've done everything alone and that's why I was hoping to meet someone to share my life with.
~I just can't love them as much as I know I have to give. And that's not what they deserve.
~Honestly for me, it's over.
~I just want to go home.

and then magically go on one date with Chris and flip it around.

Her answer to that question today? The process is accelerated. That's how she can do it.

There is a reason Chris is not watching that break-up with Brooks. He is clueless and can't even understand why everyone is asking him how he feels about it on the talk show circuit. Is that a good way to start a relationship? The past makes us who we are. Hiding it is not the answer. Everyone around them is talking about it and they are just going to pretend like it never happened?

I know Chris is a great guy and I know Des had feelings for him. But it is a complete dishonor to him to accept a proposal after what she just went through a few days before and think people are going to buy into it.

Another great post! like I've said before some on here live in a fantasy world especially if they think love works like that. I can testify that settling don't work, tried it twice and you are not happy because you will desire that passionate love. Chris is looking like a fool and he won't go through life without being reminded of it. No man is that strong. How will he feel if he see the thing Jimmy Kimmel did on him last night to I will always love (settle) for you.

When your heart is broken, it takes time to heal. You can't give a broken heart to someone else to heal. You have to heal it yourself before you can give it away again. I don't care how "accelerated" the process is. One LCD date and a few MTP hours is not enough time.

I do wish them well. I hope they can move out of the limelight. It's the only way they have a chance.

by veg_out Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:16 pm

Beeleever wrote:Oh boy...please let's not stoop to the level that we accuse people who have a different perspective as being bitter. I just read that on another thread.

I have the right to my opinion just the same as everyone else in this discussion forum. I don't know these people. I'm not invested in their relationship. I'm looking at the reality of the situation.

I have nothing against either Des or Chris or them as a couple. I just don't buy the sudden flip or the acceptance of a proposal in a matter of days. And neither is most of the viewing audience based on the reaction today.

I don't know, Bee. What then were Des' motivations for accepting Chris' proposal?

I'll say this much: I know a girl who at one time was into this guy. She was so into him that she'd talk to her best guy friend about him, and that guy friend would be supportive and listen like a good friend does. Problem was that the guy had no interest in the girl. But you know who did? The best guy friend. When the best friend told her his feelings, she was initially taken aback by it, but everything changed for her, including accepting the love that was right in front of her rather than chasing a guy who had no interest in being with her. The shift happened quickly for that couple, and she never looked back.

by Rolly Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:20 pm

Totally agree with the post above from Beeleever and pbmax.... a broken heart takes time to heal. The scene with Des and Brooks on ATFR tells me she still has unresolved feelings IMO and why wouldn't she from what we saw the week before. If there is a chance for their relationship to work he needs to know the depth of her feelings when Brooks left. They can move forward but you can't pretend the devastating break up didn't happen.

by bleuberry Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:27 pm

Personally, I don't care what she said when she was in bubble-love with Brooks. The fact of the matter is she's been in a real relationship with Chris who she will soon be living with. Anyone who thinks she's still in love with Brooks (if we can even call it that), or that she loves Brooks now, is just holding on to what they envisioned them to be like together.

by Starshine_16 Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:38 pm

Rolly wrote:Totally agree with the post above from Beeleever and pbmax.... a broken heart takes time to heal. The scene with Des and Brooks on ATFR tells me she still has unresolved feelings IMO and why wouldn't she from what we saw the week before. If there is a chance for their relationship to work he needs to know the depth of her feelings when Brooks left. They can move forward but you can't pretend the devastating break up didn't happen.

I definitely did not see any hint of unresolved feelings for Brooks. Des is glowing and she's clearly happy with Chris and they've lasted for 3 months in secret. Most of these relationships have crumbled or on their way to crumbling by this point. Just imo of course.:Smiley:

by Guest Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:43 pm

Rolly wrote:Totally agree with the post above from Beeleever and pbmax.... a broken heart takes time to heal. The scene with Des and Brooks on ATFR tells me she still has unresolved feelings IMO and why wouldn't she from what we saw the week before. If there is a chance for their relationship to work he needs to know the depth of her feelings when Brooks left. They can move forward but you can't pretend the devastating break up didn't happen.

She is a realist, IMO, and removed her rearview mirror and focussed on the road ahead.Chris always was there and she was able to put it into perspective and allowed her heart to open fully to him. She was already part way there anyways.

by Rolly Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:52 pm

I thought it was odd that they choose to not view the entire story but just the parts they wanted to see. I see this differently than you do, I hope we can respectfully disagree. I think removing the rear view mirror is dangerous and doesn't give you the whole picture. Maybe that will work for them.

I hope their future holds nothing but love....both of the deserve happiness.

by albean99 Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:56 pm

So what's the difference between this and Ali's season? I don't remember anyone saying that Roberto was the default guy or that Ali couldn't possibly love him after being so devastated from Frank leaving. Perhaps everything that happened with Brooks happened with Frank. We don't know because they didn't show us.

I hope those who feel Des is with the wrong guy can realize that Brooks was never going to be that guy for her. He just didn't love her enough to stay and apparently had no second thoughts about that.

Des was able to move on because she had concurrent relationships and had built something with Chris even if it was behind Brooks. I believe she was infatuated with Brooks but it was based on what she thought she saw in him and not his real feelings. She was forced to come to her senses and face the facts. A lot of what we saw was enhanced by the edit and it would have been easy for them to show less with Brooks and more with Chris and voila - Ali's finale complete with the f2 guy leaving at the LCD. Will it end differently than with Ali & Roberto? That's up to Des & Chris but I think they have a decent chance.

by Guest Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:59 pm

I understand. Just that, thinking out loud here, it seems to me that the rearview mirror is full of the machinations of producers, heightened senses and manipulative suggestions intertwined. With clarity, I feel, you can move forward and only take what was real and positive to the present and future you want.

I think that as she lives out her truth, Brooks will have a warm, but distant place in her heart if she looks back. The present and future is all about Chris and I see such a glow about her in all the interviews, so am convinced she is happy and made the right choice for her.

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