Kaitlyn Bristowe - Bachelorette 11 - #5 - Discussion

i've said it before - he'll be married before you know it. I'm sure Kaitlyn is furious she'll never get the televised wedding. Maybe Jason is her best shot?

crunchette wrote:@Chgohighlife - I apologize for my careless choice of words.  She did not give the ring to Shawn.  She simply took it off.  I don't know why anyone would think so little of her and her mental capacity to think that she'd literally give the ring to him to own OR that she'd sit around TN for 3.5 years unable to drive and wait for Shawn to haul her around everywhere.  She might be stupid for believing Shawn's lies for this long, but she's not that stupid.

ETA:  I have strong reasons to believe that she was in fact the one to pull the plug.  To each his own.

@crunchette
Kaitlyn herself is the one who initiated and perpetuated the idea that she gave the ring back to Shawn (in numerous forums) so that he could “re-propose”. You are obviously her fan and nothing I say is ever meant to offend her fans. However, I’ve not held a high opinion of Kaitlyn ever because I’ve never had a reason to do so and when I read things here that confirm my opinion, I agree and/or, express my endorsement of views that may not be favorable to her. I post my opinions and state them as such in the discussion threads. I hope and believe I never post anything negative in their fan thread. 
I don’t believe for one second Kaitlyn had the pride or, strength to end this debacle given her statements in the press leading up to it but, exactly as you say: To each his own. IMO, Shawn has behaved like a man who has moved on for months. I regret that for Kaitlyn or for anyone who loses the love of their life but, my opinion is and continues to be, try not to make emotional decisions even though it’s an emotional time. Keep the ring. She earned it, IMO.

Eonline confirmed she's keeping the ring. I don't think this was ever in question. As much as I dislike Shawn right now, I don't think he's the type of person who would ever fight her over that. Giving back the ring was always a symbolic thing, because she thought she would get it back.

sosleepy wrote:You know... I’m not always right about these people, or these couples, and of course I’ve been wrong.

But sometimes I’m right. I never liked Shawn. Obsessive, me-centric, angry man. That’s how I called it on the show, and lookie-here, this is who he proved himself to ultimately be. It sucks that he wasted so much of Kaitlyn’s valuable time. May he fade into obscurity and may Kaitlyn rise above and achieve Jillian/Ali/Emily level success, happiness, and peace.

I don’t even know where to begin with the bolded.
IMO fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.  
IMO 3+ yrs is a long time, too long of a time for anyone to assess blame and shame on anyone other than their self for continuing a certain path, unless they have been tied up and literally held hostage etc.  There are always choices.
IMO hopefully lessons were learned and some maturity gained for each party and it was not a waste. Jmo

@kashathediva I don’t disagree with you. But it also sounds like Shawn fed her a lot of empty promises, starting waaaaay back with the show engengagment that he never intended to be real. Next was the “oh yeah, babe, I’ll repropose for real, any day here.” Seemed to continue from there. I’m not going to blame Kaitlyn entirely for being in love and wanting him, wanting to believe him and his empty promises. Hoping someday it would come together. This is a trap a lot of women fall in, and yeah, I’m going to go ahead and place a lot of blame on the man who can’t $hit or get off the pot. He knew what her hopes, and dreams, and expectations were. He knew her birthday and birth year. He willingling wasted her valuable time. It’s not fair.

At least she has frozen eggs out of this.

I think Kaitlyn did stand up for herself, by giving him back the ring and essentially giving him an ultimatum. She should have probably done it sooner, but at the 2 year mark, it is easy to think "well, it hasn't been that long! Most people date for a few years before getting engaged and then are engaged for 1-2 years before getting married! And we just bought a house together so he's clearly committed to me!" I don't think it really started to hit her until she saw all her friends, who met their guy after she did, get married and have babies that Shawn might never give her those things. I have a hard time being too upset with her.

IMO.

sosleepy wrote:@kashathediva I don’t disagree with you. But it also sounds like Shawn fed her a lot of empty promises, starting waaaaay back with the show engengagment that he never intended to be real. Next was the “oh yeah, babe, I’ll repropose for real, any day here.” Seemed to continue from there. I’m not going to blame Kaitlyn entirely for being in love and wanting him, wanting to believe him and his empty promises. Hoping someday it would come together. This is a trap a lot of women fall in, and yeah, I’m going to go ahead and place a lot of blame on the man who can’t $hit or get off the pot. He knew what her hopes, and dreams, and expectations were. He knew her birthday and birth year. He willingling wasted her valuable time. It’s not fair.

At least she has frozen eggs out of this.

We don’t know the nitty gritty that went on intimately. Key components are missing probably from both and imo blame isn’t something I personally subscribe to for either. I am glad Shawn is choosing to keep mum on the topic. Keep it private.

I am really sad for both of them. It was clear to me that they really loved each other in the beginning. Kaitlyn, although some didn't like or understand her, was definitely 110% in from the beginning and, IMO, Shawn was also. I hope they both find the one to make them happy!

Even though it seems like they grew apart, and that does happen, Shawn seemed to be stringing Kaitlyn along for the last couple of months (IMO). If he knew that it wasn't going to work, he should have broken things off at that time instead of giving Kaitlyn false hopes that things might be fixable.

I really feel heartbroken for Kaitlyn, Shawn - not so much. I can't wait to see the next chapter for Kaitlyn!

sosleepy wrote:You know... I’m not always right about these people, or these couples, and of course I’ve been wrong.

But sometimes I’m right. I never liked Shawn. Obsessive, me-centric, angry man. That’s how I called it on the show, and lookie-here, this is who he proved himself to ultimately be. It sucks that he wasted so much of Kaitlyn’s valuable time. May he fade into obscurity and may Kaitlyn rise above and achieve Jillian/Ali/Emily level success, happiness, and peace.

Totally agree with your post!!!!

Very sad. There are compromises in every relationship but the person who moves for the other has to feel very valued. I'm not sure Shawn did that for Kaitlyn. When I look at Des and Chris, there is no doubt who Chris puts first. Heck, even Jordan moved for JoJo and he puts her first. I get the sense from Arie that he does that for Lauren. Wishing all our BN peeps happiness and the courage to live their best authentic life.

I’m sad for their fans but think this is for the best for Kaitlin. Hopefully she’ll get her act together and move on. I don’t see Jason being a good match or vice versa, though. I wish them both well.

Kashathediva wrote:

Alanna wrote:Well folks are already speculating that she and Jason (almost Bachelor  Jason) have great chemistry and would be a good match. I’d die for her to snag one of BN’s most eligible bachelors just because I’m petty like that!!

And I have difficulty seeing any man with any sense putting up with her as she is.
I hope she takes some time and reflection to find herself and go on from there on a more solid foundation vs rebound.

I like Jason and I think he can do way better than Kaitlyn, especially in a rebound relationship. I have never been a fan of Katilyn, although I do feel for her- breakups are awful. I too hope that Kaitlyn takes time for herself. Her drinking has always struck me as problematic- IMO only.