Bachelorette 14 - Becca Kufrin - Media SM - Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers* #5

I'm so glad that no one is analyzing my social media likes.

Idk what to think of Garrett, but I will give him a point for not doing a mass cleaning of his SM account. I know some posts are viewed controversial but Clearly Becca has seen all of his pics and he's okay with that. If I'm looking for the positives, I can appreciate that he chooses to go private or make changes silently instead of feeding into the negative attention. If I was him.... I would keep his profile private.

I have a question: it looks like some of his likes are from 2017, how can you dig someone’s likes from a few months ago? Is there’s an easy way to find out?

FMG2015 wrote:I'm so glad that no one is analyzing my social media likes.

Idk what to think of Garrett, but I will give him a point for not doing a mass cleaning of his SM account. I know some posts are viewed controversial but Clearly Becca has seen all of his pics and he's okay with that. If I'm looking for the positives, I can appreciate that he chooses to go private or make changes silently instead of feeding into the negative attention. If I was him.... I would keep his profile private.

I don't know...the guy has deleted posts, deleting the link in his bio, unfollowed certain public figures, and removed likes from many pictures. Doesn't that count as a "mass cleaning"? Whenever someone makes a slight critique of something in his IG, he immediately removes it. He clearly is following along the forums and social media respond and acting accordingly.

Also, I have no idea where Becca is at, but just because she's still with the guy doesn't mean she's okay with it. We heard Jillian tirelessly defend Ed back then...only to later be like "yeah, he totally cheated on me and it ruined me". We heard Amanda tirelessly defend Josh...only to later be like "yeah, he totally was abusive!". And so forth. I think women from this franchise tend to be loyal and stand by their man as long as they can, but that doesn't really speak to how they truly feel. IMO.

Aria wrote:Immigration reform is a political issue. Joking about throwing a child who had literal zero say in the matter across the wall is not.

Gay marriage is a political issue. Mocking children who are gay is not.

Women's equality is a potlical issue. Mocking women who are fat is not.

Guns' rights is a political issue. Dismissing the suffering and tragic murders of *children* is not.

Maybe he'll change. I think that if the guy is pushing 30 and still believes that a school shooting was a really well acted scene is probably not going to do a 180, but, hey, crazier things have happened. Once that happens, we can talk. At this point the guy had done nothing to show he's sorry or regrets his beliefs, just tries to delete his actions from the world every time he's caught. I can only judge him on what he's done, not some hypothetical of what he one day might do. IMO.

Adding my 1000 likes for this post!!!

Here’s where I stand. Becca fell in love with him. Just yesterday she was as happy as can be. There has to be something redeeming about this man. I actually am interested to see how this plays out. I hope he grows because of it. I hope she makes him better. I do believe people can change, especially for love. If he loves her enough he’ll want to do right by her. Or just do right period. Social media likes do no define an entire persons character. A like is so easy to do without much thought. No excuses here though.

No matter what, I expect Becca to handle this situation like all others, with grace and class. I still think there’s hope for them. At least I know there’s hope for her.

Eh I'd rather she just find herself a decent guy instead holding out hope and trying to change this one. I know that's not my decision though. I'm still Team Becca and I feel really bad for her but she picked a dud IMO and I don't think it has a shot in hell of lasting. All JMO.

SeekAny wrote:Here’s where I stand. Becca fell in love with him. Just yesterday she was as happy as can be. There has to be something redeeming about this man. I actually am interested to see how this plays out. I hope he grows because of it. I hope she makes him better. I do believe people can change, especially for love. If he loves her enough he’ll want to do right by her. Or just do right period. Social media likes do no define an entire persons character. A like is so easy to do without much thought. No excuses here though.

No matter what, I expect Becca to handle this situation like all others, with grace and class. I still think there’s hope for them. At least I know there’s hope for her.

I wish i could like this one 100 times

As I'm trying to sort out this mess, just as an FYI, I know how the like button is convenient and feels good to click it, if you look over to the right of the post, you can click the + in the bar, it will count as a like. If you hover over the bottom, you can see how many times the post was liked.

In the meantime, I'm trying to get things back in order. TY all.

IMO, Becca shouldn't have to fix or "change" this man. There are plenty of men out there. She doesn't have to stick with some problematic dude she met on tv. This is supposed to be a celebratory time for her and now she has to deal with this mess. I'd actually feel better about them moving forward if she's already aware of his views and is fine with it. But the notion that she has to sit down and have a talk with him over things you should already know before accepting a proposal... it really just highlights how flawed the process is. JMO.

Of course Garrett has redeeming qualities, no one is ever just one thing. When CH was speaking about Garrett he spoke about how Garrett was always focused on Becca throughout the process and making sure she was ok. It's just a matter of how much weight you put on those redeeming qualities vs the not so good ones. Does the fact that he loves Becca & his family and friends and is probably really nice to the people he cares about outweigh all the problematic things I learned about him today? It's a no from me because I don't see them as simple likes. I think those are really his beliefs. I'm intolerant to intolerance and that's not gonna change because Becca loves him All Jmo.

IMO, social media likes are a huge indicator of one's character. It's one thing to mindlessly like a picture of another person. But the posts that Garrett was liking are not ambiguous or mindless, or casual posts that you like just because they appear in your Instagram feed. Posts that inflammatory are ones that you like because you agree with them.

It is also not Becca's job to change him. Nor do I believe that love alone is strong enough to change someone. Again, this is all JMO, but when you are 29 years old and are so extreme in your views that you are liking posts of that magnitude, the love of a woman is not going to change that, especially when that woman is part of the group of people you're mocking. This goes far beyond politics, and is about core values and integrity IMO. And I personally cannot get behind Garrett just because Becca loves him, or hope that she can change him. She deserves a better relationship than that. All IMO.

Becca has known this guy for a couple of months. Sorry but if I were her, I'd cut my losses and run. No one would blame her.