Bachelor 22 - Arie Luyendyk Jr - General Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

Mommyof2 wrote:

Stone_Hedge wrote:

clhouse wrote:IMO Arie comes off very insecure. His posture is so slumped and defeated. He seems nervous and uncertain and not especially well-spoken Maybe he uses women for temporary validation to feel like he is good enough. A lot of people who love the chase stage of relationships seem insecure in a similar way, in my experience.

Lauren and Arie seem like falling back into old bad habits. Arie likes the unavailable girl until she becomes available. Lauren likes a guy who treats her well when courting her but has a habit of treating women badly once the chase is over.

Sounds perfect for each other. Maybe after she breaks up with him, she will be the ex that has the loudest voice. Hard to gauge even if they get married if Arie will be finally tamed. His expertise is covert and cunning. Imo

Then she will kick his butt to the curb.  She already did it with her ex-fiance for not treating her well.  Jmo.  

No doubt she would unless her ignorance is his bliss. He is an expert in the field of pulling wool over one’s eye. Imo

bluwavz wrote:Yes you should. It happened to Rachel, JoJo, Kaitlyn, Andi, ect. And for much less than Arie's done. Becca won't be free of criticism.

ITA. 
Rachel OMG got it so bad. She is still getting it I think.

bluwavz wrote:Yes you should. It happened to Rachel, JoJo, Kaitlyn, Andi, ect. And for much less than Arie's done. Becca won't be free of criticism.

Yes I know, she'll get her name changed . I remember so much love went out for DeAnna, the things said about Becca was said about DeAnna, she'll make a good bachelorette, now her name has been changed to Meanna

pbmax wrote:

bluwavz wrote:Yes you should. It happened to Rachel, JoJo, Kaitlyn, Andi, ect. And for much less than Arie's done. Becca won't be free of criticism.

Yes I know, she'll get her name changed . I remember so much love went out for DeAnna, the things said about Becca was said about DeAnna, she'll make a good bachelorette, now her name has been changed to Meanna

Meanna
Meandi

Are there more? I'm seeing a theME here.

Mommyof2 wrote:

pbmax wrote:

bluwavz wrote:Yes you should. It happened to Rachel, JoJo, Kaitlyn, Andi, ect. And for much less than Arie's done. Becca won't be free of criticism.

Yes I know, she'll get her name changed . I remember so much love went out for DeAnna, the things said about Becca was said about DeAnna, she'll make a good bachelorette, now her name has been changed to Meanna

Meanna
Meandi

Are there more?  I'm seeing a theME here.  

Mommyof2 wrote:

pbmax wrote:

bluwavz wrote:Yes you should. It happened to Rachel, JoJo, Kaitlyn, Andi, ect. And for much less than Arie's done. Becca won't be free of criticism.

Yes I know, she'll get her name changed . I remember so much love went out for DeAnna, the things said about Becca was said about DeAnna, she'll make a good bachelorette, now her name has been changed to Meanna

Meanna
Meandi

Are there more?  I'm seeing a theME here.  

I think Ben on BWG earned the MeBen promotion. IMO.

pbmax wrote:

bluwavz wrote:Yes you should. It happened to Rachel, JoJo, Kaitlyn, Andi, ect. And for much less than Arie's done. Becca won't be free of criticism.

Yes I know, she'll get her name changed . I remember so much love went out for DeAnna, the things said about Becca was said about DeAnna, she'll make a good bachelorette, now her name has been changed to Meanna

Members are allowed to change their opinions about contestants however and whenever they want.

For me, I'll cross that bridge with whoever becomes the bachelorette since that hasn't happened yet. Even with how the finale goes down I might change my stance on certain things. Right now I'm commenting on the storyline presented before me which is Arie, who allegedly proposed to two women in less than four months. One proposal allegedly was fake, and the other one was the 'real' one. It is what it is. No sweat off my back. I still think his behavior was and still is shady based on what's been shared here. IMO

I’m not sure which thread I was reading the comments in, but some were discussing why the Bachelorette has a higher success rate than the Bach ... was thinking about it while cleaning today ... and IMO I’ve figured it out.

I will start by saying I’m a girl .... been around awhile and have watched the Bach since the beginning and have Watched about 95% of seasons.  

Success rates are credited to female leads being more serious about finding a mate.   On the surface I’ve agreed ... but when thinking about the Jason/Melissa/Molly scenario and quite possibly Aries reason for switching ...(as well as many other Bach leads who’ve ended things fairly quickly) ... I’m thinking it’s more about girls wanting to “win” the Bach and will say and do all the right things to be F1 ... and once the cameras are gone, the Bach realizes he doesn’t really know his chosen after all.  But when the ‘Ette is dating multiple men, they’re more inclined to be themselves and not play the games women do to “win”.  

Think about how many times other contestants have had to warn the Bach about how different story some are around them (Krystal ) and the lead is clueless. I’m not saying the eventual F1 is a bad person, but if they’re not being totally themselves, is it any wonder if the Bach questions their decision?  Someone like Kendall IMO was herself, what you see is what you get.  I think girls are just way more competitive with each other, especially when it comes to winning the love and affection of a man.  They don’t even have to want the man himself, just the satisfaction of having him wanting her more than someone else.

Anyway, that’s my 2 cents on the subject  

Just my opinion, but I do blame both Arie and Jason for their switches. Not because I want anyone to stay in an unhappy relationship. 

Rather, and this is a steady complaint of mine, I hate the engagement to date. It is bad enough when the lead actually really just wants one more, getting engaged to someone you have barely spent 48 hours with is silly. Getting engaged right after you break up with someone else is silly. I get the contract, blah, blah, blah. I still don’t like it.

So why is the switch worse than a quick break up to me? Because, if your heart is truly torn, if you genuinely have feelings for two women (or men) then be brave. Give yourself and both people time to figure it out better. Stand up to TPTB and demand more time. Honestly, in their crazy need for new and exciting, this while a recylced theme would be new in the last ten years. And for those who want a love story, one proposal/engagement to date is much more romantic then two or a break up and switch. No one is embarrassed and no one is the other woman or man. Making a choice when you are honestly that confused makes you selfish, because while you may in some way deserve what happens to you, the two people you have put through it with you don’t deserve it at all.

And yes, I criticized Des for getting engaged to Chris, because I was sure it was too soon and she would break Chris’s heart when she broke up with him. So yes, I feel the same if the lead is a woman or a man. And yes, we have seen two “switches” work out in marriages, but I still find chosing when you are that torn selfish.

All JMZo.

northernviewer wrote:I’m not sure which thread I was reading the comments in, but some were discussing why the Bachelorette has a higher success rate than the Bach ... was thinking about it while cleaning today ... and IMO I’ve figured it out.  

I will start by saying I’m a girl .... been around awhile and have watched the Bach since the beginning and have Watched about 95% of seasons.  

Success rates are credited to female leads being more serious about finding a mate.   On the surface I’ve agreed ... but when thinking about the Jason/Melissa/Molly scenario and quite possibly Aries reason for switching ...(as well as many other Bach leads who’ve ended things fairly quickly) ... I’m thinking it’s more about girls wanting to “win” the Bach and will say and do all the right things to be F1 ... and once the cameras are gone, the Bach realizes he doesn’t really know his chosen after all.  But when the ‘Ette is dating multiple men, they’re more inclined to be themselves and not play the games women do to “win”.  

Think about how many times other contestants have had to warn the Bach about how different story some are around them (Krystal ) and the lead is clueless. I’m not saying the eventual F1 is a bad person, but if they’re not being totally themselves, is it any wonder if the Bach questions their decision?  Someone like Kendall IMO was herself, what you see is what you get.  I think girls are just way more competitive with each other, especially when it comes to winning the love and affection of a man.  They don’t even have to want the man himself, just the satisfaction of having him wanting her more than someone else.

Anyway, that’s my 2 cents on the subject  

I somewhat agree, though in this case, I think Becca did show who she is. Rather, I think Arie was not being honest about himself or with himself. He wanted Lauren, but allowed himself to be swayed by his family or TPTB or his own history. I think he was too busy trying to prove he wanted marriage and needing to be a success, that he stumbled and wasn’t honest with himself. I don’t think Becca showed a different person in two weeks of dating, rather Arie finally admitted who he truly was and what he really wanted.

IMO.

@Stone_Hedge I'm going to move your post here.

F-F4