Nick Viall - Bachelor 21 - Discussion

I was surprised by that at the time too. But then do we really know that they didn't connect? We just know it wasn't on social media.

Jane781 wrote:I was surprised by that at the time too. But then do we really know that they didn't connect? We just know it wasn't on social media.

Yes, anything is possible but when two women Nick really cares for meet...I just can't buy he wouldn't want to share a special get together in his eyes.

For the record, I am not saying that Sharlene did not respect the relationship because no one would ever convince me of that nor am I saying V didn't respect Sharlene...it's not related to Sharlene at all. It's the connection to his past and the way the media would continue to suck life out of V's space that included all that. It's just one reason I think things didn't work or they weren't the right fit (according to V/Nick).

thisgurlovesbach wrote:I also agree with [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]. As mentioned earlier, Nick has smiled a lot more in pics when he was engaged to Vanessa than he ever did previously so I believe that he fell for her hard.

Considering V is the only one from his four seasons that he ended up in a relationship with (Jen S doesn't count) post-show this is hard to measure IMO. He didn't smile after getting dumped by Kaitlyn or Andi obviously. IMO he fell hardest for Andi and had the hardest time getting over her. With Kaitlyn, he seemed over it by ATFR. I only half-azz watched his season because I find the drama on the Bach insipid and petty and there's only one "hot" male to look at versus the dozens on the Ette, but he seemed so intune with giving TPTB what they wanted that to me it looked like he faked it most of the season. None of it felt natural IMO. I think he really liked V and was most attracted to her, but held her at arm's length. The only time I really saw genuine emotion from them together was when she walked into the room right before the proposal. Then he looked in awe. But some of that could have been relief that she showed up and didn't dump him at the end like the other times

The Sharleen thing was SO ODD to me. Sharleen's one of the few, maybe even the only person  from the franchise that seems to have an authentic friendship with Nick, as opposed to the bachelor friendships that pop up. I thought it was really weird that from what I saw, Nick and Vanessa never hung out with her or Andy. Especially considering that Sharleen refrained from criticizing their relationship during her recaps (unlike Nick's other bach friends) despite the very obvious (imo) red flags.

Jane781 wrote:I've seen Vanessa like several of Sharleen's pictures. Most recently the ones from her Bachelorette party and the one she posted today. Sharleen also would comment on Vanessa's pics sometimes and I think there was some back and forth there. I personally don't think Nick's relationship with Sharleen was a sticking point in he and Vanessa's relationship. Sharleen has maintained separate relationships with Nick and Andi for years.

Jane, you got my curiosity up because I watched for likes...believe me...I'm nosey like that when I'm curious. And going back to the time V was very aware of Nick's friendship starting in Nov...V has liked two pics...one of the week they broke up and today. Nothing else. I am not surprised at all by those two likes. Again, I have no doubt V would have liked Sharlene....who doesn't? It's her lack of acknowledgement of Nick's friendship with Sharlene through instagram that caught my attention. I just hate it for Nick. I really do. I also hope no pics get out of him at the wedding on SM.

Kels0012 wrote:

thisgurlovesbach wrote:I also agree with [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]. As mentioned earlier, Nick has smiled a lot more in pics when he was engaged to Vanessa than he ever did previously so I believe that he fell for her hard.

Considering V is the only one from his four seasons that he ended up in a relationship with (Jen S doesn't count) post-show this is hard to measure IMO. He didn't smile after getting dumped by Kaitlyn or Andi obviously. IMO he fell hardest for Andi and had the hardest time getting over her. With Kaitlyn, he seemed over it by ATFR. I only half-azz watched his season because I find the drama on the Bach insipid and petty and there's only one "hot" male to look at versus the dozens on the Ette, but he seemed so intune with giving TPTB what they wanted that to me it looked like he faked it most of the season. None of it felt natural IMO. I think he really liked V and was most attracted to her, but held her at arm's length.  The only time I really saw genuine emotion from them together was when she walked into the room right before the proposal. Then he looked in awe. But some of that could have been relief that she showed up and didn't dump him at the end like the other times

I think there's a huge difference between being a contestant on the Bachelorette and actually being the Bachelor and I think that's why you believe that Nick seemed to be more emotionally invested in Andi than with Vanessa. On the bachelorette, the guys have one job, one focus, and that's trying to build a connection with the lead. Everyday they are isolated from the outside world and are constantly being asked to analyze their thoughts and feelings about ONE person who they are trying to win over. For a guy like Nick who clearly enjoys a chase and who is a competitor by nature, I think that he naturally thrived in that environment and because he had real feelings for Andi at the time, he wasn't scared to express those feelings due to the nature of the show. However, when Nick was the Bachelor, his mentally was clearly different. He went into the show with a lot of insecurities and a lot of nerves--some of which was due to his past experiences affecting his perception of Bachelor world but also because he was aware of the huge burden that he was about to undertake in his quest for love. He no longer had the luxury of thinking about his feelings for one woman; he suddenly had 30 women to manage and for a guy like Nick who has a tendency to get in his head and overthink situations (not to mention someone who is not a player and therefore not used to dating multiple women at the same time), you can tell that the experience was very emotionally taxing and draining on him as a whole, and as the lead, he also knew that he had to hold back out of respect for all of the relationships. I saw him fall in love with Vanessa (and I think that their chemistry and connection on their first date was the most explosive thing that I've seen in the history of the show) but I also saw him fighting his feelings for her and being a little guarded at certain points at the end, presumably because he was also keenly aware of the fact that he did have feelings for other women which, as you would imagine, would only make situation more challenging and awkward overall (and of course, it's also possible that he was fighting his feelings for Vanessa because he loved her in spite of his better judgment and wanted to make sure of his feelings before he was able to let go and express himself in the proposal). I just think that context is important, especially in this case, which is why I strongly believe that it's not a forgone conclusion that Nick was more into Andi than he was into Vanessa...and personally, I still believe that the fact that Nick chose Vanessa with eyes wide open to the challenges that they would face as a couple (when he had 30 women to choose from) is more romantic than him chasing after one woman while in competition with twenty-something other guys. Just my opinion.

Bluejay271 wrote:

Kels0012 wrote:

thisgurlovesbach wrote:I also agree with [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]. As mentioned earlier, Nick has smiled a lot more in pics when he was engaged to Vanessa than he ever did previously so I believe that he fell for her hard.

Considering V is the only one from his four seasons that he ended up in a relationship with (Jen S doesn't count) post-show this is hard to measure IMO. He didn't smile after getting dumped by Kaitlyn or Andi obviously. IMO he fell hardest for Andi and had the hardest time getting over her. With Kaitlyn, he seemed over it by ATFR. I only half-azz watched his season because I find the drama on the Bach insipid and petty and there's only one "hot" male to look at versus the dozens on the Ette, but he seemed so intune with giving TPTB what they wanted that to me it looked like he faked it most of the season. None of it felt natural IMO. I think he really liked V and was most attracted to her, but held her at arm's length.  The only time I really saw genuine emotion from them together was when she walked into the room right before the proposal. Then he looked in awe. But some of that could have been relief that she showed up and didn't dump him at the end like the other times

I think there's a huge difference between being a contestant on the Bachelorette and actually being the Bachelor and I think that's why you believe that Nick seemed to be more emotionally invested in Andi than with Vanessa. On the bachelorette, the guys have one job, one focus, and that's trying to build a connection with the lead. Everyday they are isolated from the outside world and are constantly being asked to analyze their thoughts and feelings about ONE person who they are trying to win over. For a guy like Nick who clearly enjoys a chase and who is a competitor by nature, I think that he naturally thrived in that environment and because he had real feelings for Andi at the time, he wasn't scared to express those feelings due to the nature of the show. However, when Nick was the Bachelor, his mentally was clearly different. He went into the show with a lot of insecurities and a lot of nerves--some of which was due to his past experiences affecting his perception of Bachelor world but also because he was aware of the huge burden that he was about to undertake in his quest for love. He no longer had the luxury of thinking about his feelings for one woman; he suddenly had 30 women to manage and for a guy like Nick who has a tendency to get in his head and overthink situations (not to mention someone who is not a player and therefore not used to dating multiple women at the same time), you can tell that the experience was very emotionally taxing and draining on him as a whole, and as the lead, he also knew that he had to hold back out of respect for all of the relationships. I saw him fall in love with Vanessa (and I think that their chemistry and connection on their first date was the most explosive thing that I've seen in the history of the show) but I also saw him fighting his feelings for her and being a little guarded at certain points at the end, presumably because he was also keenly aware of the fact that he did have feelings for other women which, as you would imagine, would only make situation more challenging and awkward overall (and of course, it's also possible that he was fighting his feelings for Vanessa because he loved her in spite of his better judgment and wanted to make sure of his feelings before he was able to let go and express himself in the proposal). I just think that context is important, especially in this case, which is why I strongly believe that it's not a forgone conclusion that Nick was more into Andi than he was into Vanessa...and personally, I still believe that the fact that Nick chose Vanessa with eyes wide open to the challenges that they would face as a couple (when he had 30 women to choose from) is more romantic than him chasing after one woman while in competition with twenty-something other guys. Just my opinion.  

Great perspective. I wholeheartedly agree. I never considered the different scenarios and your analysis is brilliant!

Sorry, but can someone explain about Nick, Vanessa, Sharleen? Little confused here, thanks!

I just saw Vanessa like Sharleen's picture. I don't get the issue here, what was supposed to have happened between Nick, Vanessa and Sharleen?

mistygracie74 wrote:Sorry, but can someone explain about Nick, Vanessa, Sharleen? Little confused here, thanks!

Misty, I'll provide my insight as I am the one who brought it up after observing. It's my opinion, please remember that. Until we have confirmation, it is not fact and that may never come. With that being said.

Sharleen and Nick are very close. They have been for several years now. Sharleen is also friends with Andi Dorfman (aka MeAndi). MeAndi lives in NY and often spends time with Sharlene. Anyway, MeAndi is the first girl as far as TB goes that Nick fell in love with. God help him...but moving on as this is not about her per se....I don't think V wanted to be a part of or associated with that part of Nick's life in a nutshell. It's not part of her love story and Nick was her forever. It's hard to explain. But being a lifelong friend with Nick as I can't see it any other way, it's just one of the things V would have to endure and IMO...she wanted no part of anything relating to Andi. Too much history there. I reached that conclusion after observing V's lack of acknowledgement towards Sharlene. Again, it had nothing to do with Sharlene. I hope that makes it a little more clear as to where my thoughts lie on the subject.

Cocoasneeze wrote:I just saw Vanessa like Sharleen's picture. I don't get the issue here, what was supposed to have happened between Nick, Vanessa and Sharleen?

I personally think nothing happened between them and people are just trying to explain a reason why N/V broke up. My guess is the distance and unwilling to compromise. IMO.

Cocoasneeze wrote:I just saw Vanessa like Sharleen's picture. I don't get the issue here, what was supposed to have happened between Nick, Vanessa and Sharleen?

I'm sorry...it's been answered above. The timing of the two likes this past week as they were the only two likes in her time with Nick going back 9 months basically. But of course, it's more than that. But again, I stated it several responses ago. Maybe you haven't gotten that far yet in reading.