Rachel Lindsay & Bryan Abasolo - Bachelorette 13 - Discussion

Demario is just showing his own bitterness that Rachel got rid of him. His bruised ego isn't letting go of that, so he lashed out at her about the only thing he could come up with, imo, and it had a dual purpose of diverting attention from his own issues. PLUS, he seems to be a person who is after the attention, so playing the race card was sure to get people talking. jerkwad.

Murakamee wrote:

During a time when so many claimed we were living in a post-racial society. Does anyone ever wonder why? Because we weren't , are not and we never were living in a post-racial society.

This may not be the place to dig into this more, but it's such an important thing that I hope it's ok for us to talk more about it. First, I am a white southerner who went to segregated schools, and was in 9th grade when they were desegregated in my town. It was a tumultuous time to say the least. So much has changed since then, and maybe I was naive, because I truly thought racism was relegated to the past.

But in the last 10 years, it seems there has been a resurgence of hostility. What was I missing? Weren't racial barriers gone? White privilege is a big buzz phrase, yet I have trouble seeing how any culture is treated differently in our country. Several have mentioned that if we don't understand it, it's because we don't live it. I really want to know what is meant and get a grasp of what others are facing. Please don't think I trivialize anyone's feelings - just the opposite. We've got to have communication in this difficult time.

This is why I hated when Demario got all holier than though on Lee at the MTA. IMO Demario says and does stupid things without thinking because he's an azz and a liar. He called Lexi a "side chick" (side note: which is it's own kind of stupid because you have to have a main chick in order to have one on the side, the clown obviously meant friends with benefits) on national TV and proudly bragged about not knowing anything about Lexi except that he met her on Bumble. He's classless and basically is calling Rachel a sellout imo

Now he's Nostradamus and knew Rachel needed a token because she wasn't into black men. She dated a black man for 5 years and never seriously dated another race. I guess his male pride is hurt so the only reason Rachel wouldn't want him is because she's not into her entire race.

Newsflash a lot of the guys on Rachel's season were lame regardless of race but the black guys were just as vanilla (pun intended) as the rest of them. The black guys showed little or no initiative in going after Rachel. The only one that was really pursuing her in a charming way was Eric. The only one who went after her 100% was Bryan IMO.

I can't believe I have to make a list but: *IMO*

Kenny-no chemistry and never really pursued her
Josiah-at least he had a personality but there was no spark and red flags about him not seeming interested in really knowing her
Will-not into black women, not sexually attracted to Rachel
Fred-immature but sweet
Eric-they were in like but he couldn't measure up to Bryan
The Cowboy date guy-I can't remember much about him, enough said.

Just because a black man is in the area of a black woman doesn't mean she has to date him. I hate Demario's comment especially because of his track record and obvious preference. *IMO* Many women, no matter her race like to be pursued and the black men that were there outside of Eric didn't really measure up. If you're vibing with a  dude at 95% should you settle for a 70% just because he's the same color as you?

Demario snot rag, douche bag, creep. (I know, I sound like an irate 8 year old but, I don't want to use really bad language). I don't care what he thinks about anything because he is too stupid to go after the people who actually harmed him so like the coward he clearly is, he redirects his weak, pathetic impotence to try to cause pain for someone who has done nothing to him. Sucks to be him. **All IMO**

What is shocking is the fact that a podcast gave of all people available, DeMario a platform to criticize Rachel. The same person who came to a show cheating on her and his girlfriend at the same time. I'm astonished

I didn't listen to the DeMario podcast and have only been reading along with all of your comments. I just wanted to say to those that have been discussing it that I appreciate all of your opinions and insights. It is so interesting to me how we each have our own interpretations of things based on our own personal life experiences. One man's truth is not the same as his neighbor's.  I appreciate those that take the time to share their own thoughts.

More than anything, I appreciate a person's ability to think, speak, and act as an individual. I am not a fan of group-think, categorizing, putting people into nice, tidy boxes. I see society's (IMO our government's and institutions') obsessive collecting of demographic information to be part of the problem. Instead of just living our lives interacting with others on an individual basis, we are constantly being labeled as different--and most often because of the (random) birthplace of our distant ancestors. I am asked/forced to check off a box, and you are asked/forced to check off a box identifying ourselves as part of this group or that group for something that we quite frankly had no control over whatsoever (our race). Isn't the act of having to self-identify ourselves as part of a particular group only highlighting that others are not a part of our group? I just don't like it. I'd prefer that you get to know me and look at my skills, idiosyncrasies, mistakes, successes...and judge me as an individual. I'm not asking you to like me, just to see me for the complex, mosaic that makes me ME. IMO that is the way to live, the way to love, and the way to get out of the mindset that a person belongs in nice, tidy box. I appreciate that we are all individuals, some of whom have had some shared experiences. IMO, To limit ourselves to merely being a member of a larger group robs us of our true freedom to reach our fullest potential as an individual. Albert Einstein said: "It is only the individual that is given a soul."  I believe that individuals should be fully allowed to express their souls, however they see fit. JMHO.

@MiaHawk Oh Mia, another beautifully written post. I love the way you expressed those thoughts. To me, that is exactly what Martin Luther King was trying to bring about. thank you for stating it so well.

@MiaHawk
excellent post. IMO
Thank you.

@BKay imo if demarios "girlfriend" didn't show up he would have been a serious contender. Imo he was one of the best looking guys and rachel was into him until lexi came. They had a moment in the group date where he picked her up and the chemistry was obvious and it was clear he was gonna pursue her hard if their relationship wasn't cut short. None of the other black guys had the same chemistry that demario had with rachel jmo

rachelisqueen wrote: @BKay imo if demarios "girlfriend" didn't show up he would have been a serious contender. Imo he was one of the best looking guys and rachel was into him until lexi came. They had a moment in the group date where he picked her up and the chemistry was obvious and it was clear he was gonna pursue her hard if their relationship wasn't cut short. None of the other black guys had the same chemistry that demario had with rachel jmo

Rachelisqueen, we saw the same thing. Rachel would never have been angry as she was had she not been so upset by Demario's actions AND she gave him a second chance when he came back to the mansion. He was a return to a type - the smooth talking athlete. Many of us have been there. Thank goodness for Lexi.

Chgohighlife wrote:

rachelisqueen wrote: @BKay imo if demarios "girlfriend" didn't show up he would have been a serious contender. Imo he was one of the best looking guys and rachel was into him until lexi came. They had a moment in the group date where he picked her up and the chemistry was obvious and it was clear he was gonna pursue her hard if their relationship wasn't cut short. None of the other black guys had the same chemistry that demario had with rachel jmo

Rachelisqueen, we saw the same thing. Rachel would never have been angry as she was had she not been so upset by Demario's actions AND she gave him a second chance when he came back to the mansion. He was a return to a type - the smooth talking athlete. Many of us have been there. Thank goodness for Lexi.

I honestly don't think she was as upset by DeMario's actions as she was by producers. She knew they set her up and I think she thought they were trying to get a negative reaction out of her. Her getting all upset and storming off, looked to be more about them then him. As for letting him come back, I'm sure he was prodded to come back...she's calmed down now, she wants to see you, blah, blah, blah, while she was told to give him a chance, it would make for good tv, it would show that you don't care and are the bigger person, blah, blah, blah. There was never going to be any chance of him coming back no matter what. They were both just doing their job.