Vanessa Grimaldi - Bachelor 21 - *Sleuthing Spoilers* #4

Diana wrote:I just don't see either of them moving, how is that suppose to work out?  I love them but I'm being realistic IMO

But how do we know that? How do we know that Vanessa will not move? Because she appears happy with her job and students? Well plenty of people have moved away from a job and family they love for a relationship. Vanessa said in the Glamour interview at the start of the season that she would move because she was asked even then about living in Canada, while Nick is American.

The fact is we don't know because Nick and Vanessa have not had a chance to share their plans or feelings or thoughts since the finale because their relationship is still being hidden. We're going off of the edit of the show that showed her family grilling them and now an episode where they both supposedly say they're not moving (although that's RS's interpretation of the conversation because the episode hasn't aired yet) and an edit clearly meant to put doubt in viewers' mind about the outcome.

Again I'm not saying those two are for sure together and will live happily ever after. Let's face it, the odds are against them with this franchise and this show is always a crapshoot. I'm just saying I feel like a number of factors - RS (yes I know some don't pay attention to him but he's just one thing I'm throwing out), negativity based on how poorly the season has been edited, online chatter about how awful Vanessa supposedly is, etc. have all created this perfect storm of doom. But I for one am willing to wait for the ATFR and see what they say and how they act. IMO, that usually more than anything is what truly tells the tale of the couple.

I will never forget Chris and Whitney's GMA interview were they were sitting next to each other no physical connection/intimacy. It was like two strangers. That was when I knew those two were doomed.  Not based on anything before that. If I see that kind of body language from Nick and Vanessa or hear a bunch of hemming and hawwing and vague answers about their future, then yeah I'm putting them in the 3 months category tops. But for right now, I still maintain that I don't buy there's been anything from those two that suggests they're already done and certainly not the poor editing of the show which is meant to put doubt on who the lead picks. And in Nick's case, meant to put doubt that he even ends up with anyone.

For me, there is no comparison with CS coz I always felt Whitney was the by-default winner since his real F1 Becca wouldn't reciprocate. I could be totally wrong but his relationship with Whitney was totally one-sided which is far from the case with N&V IMO. 

Maybe I don't see DWTS being an issue coz for me, it's nothing more than a new job with a pay. IMO People don't stop taking new jobs when they are in a new relationship so I don't see the problem. It might be stressful but if you want to make it work, you will learn how to balance things. All JMO.

I don't even understand why some might think DWTS is some sort of voodoo place that breaks up couples. Um, if the couple is already doomed before the show even starts then a couple of hours a day dancing with a pro is not going do much to that relationship even if they're 237647824 miles apart. If there's anyone that can handle DWTS, I think it's Vanessa and Nick, IMO.

@Cila51290 I think it's because people see Nick continuing in the spotlight and that means he isn't interested in love, in making it work, IDK - I'm guessing

... but see, I've read many of TB couples (who, BTW, one of them had to appear twice on TB show in order to choose their F1) have been on some other ABC shows (family something, millionaire smth, therapy smth) ... and yet are together and nobody is accusing them of not trying to make it work - IMO - but I guess the doubt will continue ...

I guess my reason for seeing DWTS as negative for a couple, is that quite a few people have dated/hooked up from DWTS and it's just super touchy/close and flirty. And yea just Nick continuing to be on tv again. I just thought we would finally be done with Nick. Nope. He's. Never. Going. Away.

I have tried to stay neutral this season.  I must say I see Nick as a 1 woman man.  If he and Vanessa are still together which I think they are, then he wont be messing with the partner he is place with. Nick has more rhythm than all of those that went from the franchise. I think he would go far and that money would give him space to breath, especially with this new relationship. I don't see anything wrong with that.

happygolucky wrote:@Cila51290 I think it's because people see Nick continuing in the spotlight and that means he isn't interested in love, in making it work, IDK - I'm guessing

... but see, I've read many of TB couples (who, BTW, one of them had to appear twice on TB show in order to choose their F1) have been on some other ABC shows (family something, millionaire smth, therapy smth) ... and yet are together and nobody is accusing them of not trying to make it work - IMO - but I guess the doubt will continue ...

I love Jojo and Jordan and when she was rumoured to be on last year I was really against it and praying it wasn't true. I watch DWTS, IMO it fosters rumours & hook ups, it's a lot of press and a lot of scrutiny, it's not what I would want for a new couple that I like. People think if Vanessa was on and they were partnered with Maks and Peta it would make a difference to the rumour mill? The rumours would just be "Nick and Peta's torrid affair! How Vanessa and Maks have turned to each other for support" etc IMO. Outside of rumours it also stops the couple from really progressing IMO. All the couples that have come from this franchise and have jumped into another reality show right after have said afterwards that it stunts their growth together as a couple. If I was a fan, there's no way I'd be excited about this possibility. All JMO.

I don't think DWTS will cause them to break up. IMO it sure as heck will expedite it.

IMO they are both stubborn which means that trait can translate into stickwithitness.  In epis aired I see two people who mutually want each other and in 1 of Nick's blogs he wrote that he and Vanessa always find their way back to each other... IMO they are hammering out all the sh*t that real couples do before making the life changing decision to get engaged: dealing with each other's histories and quirks, finding out if they have shared values like how high family ranks and work ethic, conflict resolution skills, level of nurturing, ability to satisfactorily communicate feelings, sustained desire and intimacy needs, patience, ability to make each other happy.
Now they will be on to the logistics: where to live and how would life be financed. I need to hear this last piece from them in an epi before getting a sense of their direction.

IMO, this progression has never been shown before by this franchise in this much detail.

IMO Rumors are always going to be there for these couples as long as they are in the public eye. Just last week, I read one about how Nick and Jojo were hooking up at a Grammy party and cheating on their respective fiances.   There is no escaping that nonsense IMO. 

Personally, I see zero problem for DWTS since it's not a relationship based show. Now if it was something else like MBC, Couples Therapy or even the next season of HEA, I won't be supportive. Nothing good can come out of those shows IMO. 

All JMO.

Making a relationship work and working a job/project for several hours a day are not mutually exclusive things. If the relationship doesn't work out, it's not going to be as simple as "he joined DWTS, so we broke up." It'll speak to more rooted problems related to how much effort they're each putting in, if their priorities line up, how supportive they'll be of their partner, etc. This is a situation where we'll all have to wait and see what happens. Sleuthing is fun, for sure. But when it comes to determining relationship longevity, I don't think it can be conclusive until a breakup has actually happened.

Nick is never going away, whether people like it or not, because the guy knows how to hustle in this industry. He's not burning bridges by blaming producers or lashing back at negative press. He's clearly making some friendships that are higher-rung than his D-list celebrity status, and making other friendships that are allowing him the opportunity to be an entrepreneur. Call it famewhoring. Call it hustling. Call it working hard. Call it whatever you want. But it's working.

^^My opinion^^

@bleuberry
Your post made me chuckle and yet it has so much truth. "I am my own worst enemy."