Nick Viall - Bachelor 21 - Episode 3 Jan 16th - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

mizzoufan wrote:I'm sorry I think it extreme fake for a guy to cry after only one date with a girl like he did over Vanessa. We give the girls a horrible time for doing that crying thing after one date.  

I get that. But for someone who has seen Nick in different seasons - I know he gets emotional and tears up. I believe that some of us here feel that his attraction with Vanessa has reached a deeper level at date 1 because of interactions they've had before that. We were all commenting about the hug when they met up at the 0-Grav date. I also felt the familiarity between them at that point so we think some of their interaction from night 1 to that date has been hidden or cut out.

I don't think all the facts are there. IMO. I don't know how long that exact 1:1 time was and what the real context was vs what was edited and shown. Something may have touched a nerve.
Personally, I cried for almost 20 yrs whenever the topic(or a topic that even reminded me) was brought up of one of my brothers. He died at 18 in a horrible car crash. People probably thought I was nuts. It wasn't their brother. A lot of time had passed. They didn't get it. But I did and realized no one but me was really touched and I had to move on and deal with it privately.

Tearing up is different than crying IMO ... and tearing up is a sign of deep emotion ....and many of us do it no matter how hard we try to contriol it. Im like Kasha ...when a subject touches my heart ....my eyes show it. I think Nick is one of those people. Tears coming to his eyes show that she touched his heart. Tears can also come with relief ...and like he told Van ...he felt relief that hes met soemone that can give him a happy ending, something he was afaid wouldnt happen for him. I saw his reaction to their conversation and date on a whole as something positive for them as a couple.

I'm sorry I think it extreme fake for a guy to cry after only one date with a girl like he did over Vanessa. We give the girls a horrible time for doing that crying thing after one date.

He wasn't crying over Vanessa per se. He was talking about his feelings regarding everything in the past few years and got emotional. She played a part in it in the sense that she made him hopeful that the whole "fourth time" might actually work out. But it was more than just, "oh I'm already so madly in love with this woman" and rather the weight of everything in the past few years. IMO.

I don't think all the facts are there. IMO. I don't know how long that exact 1:1 time was and what the real context was vs what was edited and shown. Something may have touched a nerve.

Proof of this, that we didn't see full context, was Vanessa's words to him when she confronted him about his behavior, telling him that he said he was concerned about the decisions he would make as the lead and how he would be judged for those. We didn't see that on their date but clearly he shared those concerns and fears with her at some point. And to me it's telling that he would feel comfortable enough with her to share those fears and concerns.

I think a lot of times the contestants that are an emotional wreck after being eliminated night one is very different than why Nick teared up.

When asked what she liked about him, I was expecting, "you put yourself out there" "you followed your heart" instead she mentioned his family and the bond he had with his family, paraphrasing, that hit him. His family has supported him throughout the whole ordeal of the last few years, all the hate he got and everything else. Also, Vanessa related to that because she herself is very close to her family and therefore it's important to her.

Contestants that leave night one, crying and carrying on IMO may be due to the fact that their ambitions for being famous were squashed.

I didn't like when Dani Lo told Nick about the possibility of falling in love with him and that time alone with him wasn't even a 1 on 1 date. I feel like it was too soon to say that considering they haven't even had deep convos.

Sometimes these women are into their heads a lot about the premise of the show being a game and wanting to be the "winner". I like when the convos feel more organic. JMO

Which leads me back to when Vanessa told Nick "I forgot about the rose" and Nick said "That's a good thing".

Lisa wrote:

BKay wrote:This episode. Oh me. So many conflicting thoughts. This makes me sad, but I like Nick less at this point than before the season started. Don't hate me - I'm still hanging in, hoping he will begin to look like a 36 year old MAN vs. a kid who just wants to have play time and look at boobs. Otherwise, he seems so uninterested in being there.

The Nissa date was a good start, although I did wonder if he was enjoying it so much because they got to play. Yes, he was very sweet with Vanessa, but was it because he knew the cameras were rolling? Egad, I hate being so cynical when it's possible there was a real love story unfolding.

I worry about all this too..just not sure if this can last outside once the hype of the show is over..& the pull of Hollywood is strong...also IF he goes on DWTS...game over, I give them 3 months tops..it's just the kiss of death for couples & I like Nick now but he seems quite "fame hungry"

I love that Vanessa is so straight forward....not playing to the cameras. The connection and the tears by Nick are very real...because they are about family and acceptance at its core IMO. I also think this is why Nick and Vanessa's relationship will not work in the long run. Vanessa is very clear that she is devoted to her family and wants children of her own. While I imagine Nick wants those things too....IMO Nick wants LA and fame chasing more. Nick does not have to live in LA and does not have home he owns or job that he can't leave there. Nick lives in LA because he is in pursuit of staying in the limelight. His current lifestyle is not family centric. His family does Not live in LA. If Vanessa has to leave everything she holds dear in Montreal...her family, friends, incredible job....to hang out in LA to party at Bach/Ette events, go to clubs, or cheer for Nick on DWTS with no life of her own and/or an LA exit strategy to live by family..then IMO they will be Dunzo in relatively short order. Vanessa says she wants to be a partner and have a partner who thinks of what is best for that person and consider their needs in every choice they make. I just don't see Nick being willing to consider what is best for Vanessa over his own need to be Nick from the Bachelor fame. I hope he proves me wrong because he is lucky to have found Vanessa IMO....but I am not betting Nick has it in him to be that better version of himself right now.
All JMO

mizzoufan wrote:I'm sorry I think it extreme fake for a guy to cry after only one date with a girl like he did over Vanessa. We give the girls a horrible time for doing that crying thing after one date.  

Imo ~ Nick has always been authentic. Seeing him cry with Vanessa, was about as real as it gets on this show, and I personally loved seeing his raw emotions in that moment. I am so hopeful for those two.

mizzoufan wrote:I'm sorry I think it extreme fake for a guy to cry after only one date with a girl like he did over Vanessa. We give the girls a horrible time for doing that crying thing after one date.  

The difference is that this was not Nick's first date. He had four seasons full of heartbreak and disappointment weighing on him. To me his crying was more about stress relief than anything else. Finally, I think he felt everything aligning...the mental, physical and emotional....which I think he was fearing was not going to happen.

There were a bunch of things in this episode that surprised me. Pleasantly so.

-Their ease and comfort right from the start of the date.
-Just how protective Nick was of Vanessa when she got sick. (He even mentioned that.) The man didn't even flinch when she was puking. That alone was impressive. (I work with this kind of stuff and even I get grossed out.) Not Nicky.
-They actually made out after the puking! (Not for me. Not a chance in hell unless all parties had thoroughly brushed their teeth and used mouthwash.)
-That Vanessa was most impressed by how close Nick was with his family, particularly his mom. (That was a totally unexpected answer by him and me.)
-That Nick cried! For a man who has been pretty much going through the motions thus far with everyone else, that he go so emotional, so quickly....and that I thought it was a genuine reaction of relief and appreciation, was not expecting that.

Cila51290 wrote:I didn't like when Dani Lo told Nick about the possibility of falling in love with him and that time alone with him wasn't even a 1 on 1 date. I feel like it was too soon to say that considering they haven't even had deep convos.

Sometimes these women are into their heads a lot about the premise of the show being a game and wanting to be the "winner". I like when the convos feel more organic. JMO

Which leads me back to when Vanessa told Nick "I forgot about the rose" and Nick said "That's a good thing".

  This! Authentic and organic.  I think their relationship developed faster because they were connecting on different levels already. IMO: Physical Attraction (check), Cerebral connection (check), Compatibility = value system (check), belief system, living environments, life choices.  Not sure if they already started talking about those but the latter they can mesh and negotiate.

IMO the fact that Nick does not have a permanent home in LA or a car actually shows that he doesn't want to put roots there. He apparently didn't even rent/lease an apartment and instead was staying with a friend before the bachelor happened. IMO That is not the behavior of someone who wants to make LA home in the long run.

IMO if two people want to make a relationship work, they will make it work irrespective of distance, jobs, other priorities. The odds are against Nissa but I will remain hopeful that it'll work for them.

Personally, i havent seen such an honest and mutual relationship developing since Ashleigh and JP. Funny how it seems like the least likely leads can give you some of the best seasons.