JoJo Fletcher - Jordan Rodgers - Bachelorette 12 - Discussion

rhondam wrote:
I re-watched ATFR and I personally think their/her anger, if this is what you even call it, had to do with the hard time they had to go through because of the negative tabloid stuff when it should've been a happy time. 

I clipped just the beginning of your post here, but the whole thing was so good I want to frame it! I think you nailed it - as the bach old-timers always say "tptb ain't your friend." Great post.

Hmmm... I think I'm mostly rooting for Jordan and JoJo (not a fan, but like not wishing and/or waiting for their demise either), because with Jo^3, that makes 8 franchise couples currently together out of 32 seasons. That's a 25% success rate, 1:4 working couples. When you stop and think about it, that's mind boggling. If JoJo and Jordan can go the distance... That's freaking 3 couples, 4 if you count spin off Janner in a row. Unprecedented. And this before only a 3 couple bust, and you are back-to-back with SeanCat and Chres successes.

The heck??! How long before TPTB realize this and start pimping this success streak? I mean, they SHOULD. It's kind of crazy given the track record and reputation for this show.

The house in Dallas was listed  for  rent at $3,250 a month according to this article.

http://www.latimes.com/business/realestate/hot-property/la-fi-hotprop-jojo-fletcher-jordan-rodgers-house-20160805-snap-story.html

Diana wrote:Speaking of Bachelorette recaps, anyone notice this part from Ashley I's? Interesting even people in the franchise are "not feeling it"


http://www.cosmopolitan.com/entertainment/tv/news/a62250/bachelorette-season-12-jojo-fletcher-episode-11-finale-recap/?src=socialflowTW

I think they were acting awkward on ATFR because they knew the tabloids were going to be a topic and honestly, who really wants to sit there and listen to your name being dragged through the mud. The biggest elephant in the room was the Rodgers family rift. When CH brought it up , you could see how uncomfortable Jordan became and in watching JoJo's face, she was thinking the same thing. I wanted to smack CH when he said, hopefully Aaron will come to the wedding. Shut up. Just zip it. I will give him kudos for one thing, as he said that Jordan handled the situation quite well.

avacaroline wrote:I stayed unspoiled this season so I've been off social media and have kept away from the tabloids.  Jordan reminds me a lot of my husband....both are the youngest child (Jordan's "look at me" personality is a classic example of birth order) in a family of professional athletes.  Like Jordan, my husband had a successful sports career, but it wasn't on the same level as his brothers. He was constantly being compared, constantly accused of riding their coat tails, constantly being misunderstood and told that he was entitled. It hardens you and makes you a bit scrappy and defensive and you always feel the need to prove to others that you are worthy of being where you are.  Athletes, especially elite athletes that played at the level Jordan did (the SEC is no joke), have to have a certain personality makeup -they have to be programmed a certain way- to be where they are. They have to have a high level of confidence and an ability to compartmentalize their feelings, especially as a quarterback. You heard him say several times that he "could only worry about the things that he could control"...that's a common mindset in sports psychology. For the most part (I'm speaking in broad generalizations), they just look at life very differently from others. They are a bit self-centered and they aren't maybe as sensitive and as soft because they're just wired differently. They're naturally very driven and competitive and a bit cocky and it's very difficult to just turn those things off when you step off the playing field because so much of it is so deeply ingrained in who they are.  All of these traits make them great athletes and competitors, but it tends to cause some trouble when they become boyfriends and husbands. They screw up a lot and they have to learn to take the focus off of themselves. Some make that transition well and others don't. Some women can handle those strong personalities and even find it attractive and others not so much. Only time will tell with these two.

@avacaroline, I'd like to thank you for taking the time to write this post. Your personal experiences and perspective on Jordan is very insightful. 

I absolutely believe that all people are wired differently and that depending upon our wiring and our natural talents we are better suited for different careers. The time and effort that we put into our education or job reinforces further the importance of sharpening our professional skill set.  There is feedback and rewards for those qualities and skills in the office, classroom, or on the field. We begin to see ourselves as the qualities that we most exhibit and exhibit with the greatest amount of frequency. The average person spends 40+ hours at their jobs, a significant portion of their time. Sometimes that causes us to have difficulties in transitioning to a new role in our lives. 

I personally found that the process/mindset of my profession and the skill set that I had built up over a decade to perform my job well was sometimes in contrast to the process/mindset and skill set that I needed when I was the mother of my first child.  My profession requires knowledge of facts, numbers, and research to back it up. Motherhood not so much. It's a lot more instinctual. My profession requires me to be very organized, and I am by nature a linear thinker (step 1, step 2, step 3). Motherhood not so much. It's a lot more fly by the seat of your pants at times, especially when they are babies. I did fine with the organizational skills, learning new information, and time management aspects of being a new mom, but I struggled with the fact that I was no longer in control of vast segments of my life. I very much had to adjust and become more spontaneous and accepting of a certain level of chaos. In my profession, even a tiny error can lead to a disastrous results, so there is always the goal to strive for perfection. In life, if you strive to be the perfect parent or have a perfect child, you are signing your own contract with Misery. 

I share this example, applying the concept that you touched upon, because maybe others here can relate to what I experienced as a way to understanding Jordan better. I think you have given me a different perspective on and appreciation for Jordan's personality. Again, thank you for sharing.

@MiaHawk, such wisdom in your post! Thank you for sharing.  It's true that the very traits that make you so successful at work, can cause a huge stumbling block in one's personal life.  I can't tell you how many times I have had to remind my husband that we aren't in a locker room and that he's not my coach.  


Here's what I will find interesting to watch....

Many of the women I know in our circle of "player's/coach's" wives are, in general, ladies that don't mind having a strong leader in the home but are also very strong in who they are and very independent. They don't need constant reassurance and a ton of emotional attention.  Although I like JoJo and think that she's smart, driven, and kind, she also strikes me as a bit high maintenance and she speaks often of her insecurities in relationships.  Someone like Jordan, that won't join her out on every emotional limb, could be very grounding for her.  At the same time, he's going to have to make some big adjustments for her.  He's going to have to become more selfless.  It drove me insane every time he would say "I got what I needed or it's just what I needed".  That's the egotistical, self absorbed, tunnel vision of the athlete coming out in him and I can't see that working too well with a girl like JoJo.....

We shall see.  

avacaroline wrote:@MiaHawk, such wisdom in your post! Thank you for sharing.  It's true that the very traits that make you so successful at work, can cause a huge stumbling block in one's personal life.  I can't tell you how many times I have had to remind my husband that we aren't in a locker room and that he's not my coach.  


Here's what I will find interesting to watch....

Many of the women I know in our circle of "players/coaches" wives are, in general, ladies that don't mind having a strong leader in the home but are also very strong in who they are and very independent. They don't need constant reassurance and a ton of emotional attention.  Although I like JoJo and think that she's smart, driven, and kind, she also strikes me as a bit high maintenance and she speaks often of her insecurities in relationships.  Someone like Jordan, that won't join her out on every emotional limb, could be very grounding for her.  At the same time, he's going to have to make some big adjustments for her.  He's going to have to become more selfless.  It drove me insane every time he would say "I got what I needed or it's just what I needed".  That's the egotistical, self absorbed, tunnel vision of the athlete coming out in him and I can't see that working too well with a girl like JoJo.....

We shall see.  

I totally agree with your "what to watch" paragraph, and that is precisely why I thought Robby was a better fit for Jojo. But, like we've both said, even if someone has a tendency towards a certain approach doesn't mean that they can't learn a new one. It just might make it a bit more challenging, and hopefully he is able to hone his communication skills, too. 

I do think that Jordan has some insecurities from his (self-perceived) shortcomings in life, the comparisons to his older brother, and the family riff. Jojo herself said on the HTD that she was surprised to see how wounded he was. I heard him say several times throughout the process that he didn't want to disappoint her. That was the crux of his FRC morning note to her - an apology for hurting her by not asking for the blessing like he had said he would.  

I think Jojo is a bit of a 'fixer'. So, for me, that dynamic is a red flag. Personally, I wouldn't pick the bruised fruit. I would have picked the man who didn't have insecurities or what I perceive as some level of low self-esteem. We all know by now, I would have chosen Robby (for myself   and for Jojo). 

I remember this psychology class I took in college where the topic being discussed were family relationships. For example, if your father was a verbally abusive man, don't have the mindset of what you DON'T want to be like, instead have the mindset of what you DO want to be like. That if you are constantly focused on the negative things that you don't want to happen, you'll miss out on focusing on what you do want to happen. Don't look behind you trying to run from something. Look forward and run towards something. In other words, if he is constantly thinking I hope I don't disappoint her, then he will be destined to disappoint her in a self fulfilling prophecy of sorts. Eh, but what the heck do I know? I wish them luck.

^^^Very interesting conversation and insights, Mia and Ava!! Thanks for sharing. Certainly an interesting dynamic. Seems that they could be one of those "can't live with/ can't live without" match ups. Lots of passion and lots of flare ups.

Time will indeed tell...

casjacknick wrote:Well if Ben and Lauren's show has the same producers as the ette than they must like their new couple to put them on the happily ever after. I am excited to see all four of them together. They are very different people that should make for some interesting conversations.

That is if Jojo and the douche are still together by the time B&L are done.  

The house is rented and furnished so they only bring in suitcases when they move in. Makes it easy for a move out when it happens.  Jojo's friend is intentionally misleading referring to herself as realtor than broker. Yeah right! is she still spewing uncalled for hate on Robby?

No, the house isn't furnished. They are buying together the things they need to furnish it.

^^^ Ya,  and don' forget his his bed from Nashville.

Diana wrote:Speaking of Bachelorette recaps, anyone notice this part from Ashley I's? Interesting even people in the franchise are "not feeling it"


http://www.cosmopolitan.com/entertainment/tv/news/a62250/bachelorette-season-12-jojo-fletcher-episode-11-finale-recap/?src=socialflowTW

Yet she's feeling it between herself and a guy who's told her numerous times that he only sees her as a friend? Yeah okay Ashley. She's entitled to her opinion of course, but I personally give more credence to opinions from people who've actually been in a real life relationship at some point in their lives.