Married At First Sight - Season 2 - Ryan DeNino - Jessica Castro - *Sleuthing - Spoilers*

^^^ yep! I don't find this couple enjoyable to watch.

I don't like the way Ryan talks to Jessica and gives her subtle and not so subtle jabs. I know he's emulating the way that his grandpa talked to his grandma. WHen he was reminiscing about how his grandpa would tell his grandma to "shut up," it reminded me of the way old 60-70s sitcom husbands like Archie Bunker and Jackie Gleason would talk to their wives. I just don't find that to be cute or funny but IMO it's disrespectful. This is 2015 and each partner should be supportive, encouraging and uplifting. What did it matter where she ironed? I thought that was just so weird. IMO seems like Jess can't do anything right in his very critical eyes.  

On the other hand, Jessica is just acting like a snapping turtle; hiding in her shell and then coming out with a zinger. And, ??? ...she was initially shocked that all Ryan did was eat out ($60 per day) and that she was a big cook.  Well, she needs to take initiative and COOK SOMETHING. Their dinner party on New Year's Day would have been perfect opportunity to showcase her cooking and instead they got takeout. Again, wth?! Plus that scene where it appeared she was home from work first and just sitting there waiting for him to come home and decide what they should eat.  She had told him that she'd gladly do groceries and cook so she should give it a whirl sometime!

Their inability to communicate in an honest, respectful way is really outrageous. She seems drawn to role of victim while his anger seems to be always ready to boil over. EEEKKKKK. Where are the experts with guidance?!?

PLEASE show us something good with these two next week.

the argument this episode ended with emphasized something some in this thread had pointed out previously -- ryan completely blew up when she mentioned that he took the $100 cos "he was short on money" -- he's working really hard to portray a certain image about himself (spends $50-60 daily on food -- easily affords a huge amount of a $4000/mo rent etc) - and it looks like she crossed the line by portraying him a certain way when she brought up the money...

Agreed. nothing is enjoyable about this couple at all. In fact I am beginning to wonder if they even like each other.

emusha wrote:the argument this episode ended with emphasized something some in this thread had pointed out previously -- ryan completely blew up when she mentioned that he took the $100 cos "he was short on money" -- he's working really hard to portray a certain image about himself - and it looks like she crossed the line by portraying him a certain way when she brought up the money...

agreed he totally lost his cool after she brought up the money piece. I think he just doesn't like that he is being exposed. I believe she said he was "short on cash" which is contradictory to how he said he made a lot of money

Exactly!! edited my comment to include that part about how he was portraying himself -- I def think Jess has serious difficulties opening up with stuff she's not happy about but I'm starting to question how much respect he has for her and how committed he really is in the process -- he is coming off as a tad bit condescending which is the opposite kind of approach she needs -- he needs to realize he is not in the time of his grandpa's marriage ... 1950s woman or what not...willing to take it when a guy keeps shouting at her...
he keeps wanting her to communicate but the way he blows up I don't really know if he'd be ok with that -- maybe they'd have been the constantly fighting couple... dr. schwartz made a solid comment this round about the fact that communication is a two way road and he needs to put in his bit...

MVMom39forever wrote:^^^ yep! I don't find this couple enjoyable to watch.

I don't like the way Ryan talks to Jessica and gives her subtle and not so subtle jabs. I know he's emulating the way that his grandpa talked to his grandma. WHen he was reminiscing about how his grandpa would tell his grandma to "shut up," it reminded me of the way old 60-70s sitcom husbands like Archie Bunker and Jackie Gleason would talk to their wives. I just don't find that to be cute or funny but IMO it's disrespectful. This is 2015 and each partner should be supportive, encouraging and uplifting. What did it matter where she ironed? I thought that was just so weird. IMO seems like Jess can't do anything right in his very critical eyes.  

On the other hand, Jessica is just acting like a snapping turtle; hiding in her shell and then coming out with a zinger. And, ??? ...she was initially shocked that all Ryan did was eat out ($60 per day) and that she was a big cook.  Well, she needs to take initiative and COOK SOMETHING. Their dinner party on New Year's Day would have been perfect opportunity to showcase her cooking and instead they got takeout. Again, wth?! Plus that scene where it appeared she was home from work first and just sitting there waiting for him to come home and decide what they should eat.  She had told him that she'd gladly do groceries and cook so she should give it a whirl sometime!  

Their inability to communicate in an honest, respectful way is really outrageous. She seems drawn to role of victim while his anger seems to be always ready to boil over. EEEKKKKK. Where are the experts with guidance?!?

PLEASE show us something good with these two next week.

Yes, Yes, Yes, MVMom39forever!!!              Really, this board seriously needs a LIKE button.

Although I love this couple, they are getting on my last nerve! They are so weird with each other, you can sense the walls from a mile away. They are not letting each other in because either one wants to be the vulnerable one.
Ryan is very immature, he has no clue how to properly treat Jessica. He wants to treat her the way his grandfather treated his grandma, which by the way sounds abusive. He hasn’t invested his time to know her and understand her, instead he’s bullying and disrespecting her constantly causing her to shut down even more. I really think he wants things to work out but he’s not putting in the proper effort for that to happen.
Jessica needs to stop her whining. She goes into victim mode every time they have a conversation, it’s very annoying. She doesn’t speak up for herself but explodes at random times about whatever she’s holding in. We teach a man how we want to be treated through conversations, she just expects him to know, it doesn’t work that way. Also, there should have been a meal on that table when he got home not a pile of magazines, especially since she told him that she would cook for him instead of ordering out every day, that just added fuel to whatever nonsense was going on between them.
The money issues should have been discussed off camera, I don’t like to air out my dirty laundry in front of the world so I can see why he reacted the way he did, it was not okay, but I understand why he got upset.
Next week things seem to get even worse. But I still have hope that they can work their issues and become better people for each other.

The entire episode you could tell they were both on edge. Did they even show them kiss at all? 

The fight was very choppy and I agreed when Ryan said that if there's tension, you will find something to fight about. For Jess that was the money (even though she took some too?!) and for Ryan it was the ironing and lack of home cooked meals. I suspect they can move past this in a good way but they really need help communicating.

Soribel wrote:Although I love this couple, they are getting on my last nerve! They are so weird with each other, you can sense the walls from a mile away.  They are not letting each other in because either one wants to be the vulnerable one.
Ryan is very immature, he has no clue how to properly treat Jessica. He wants to treat her the way his grandfather treated his grandma, which by the way sounds abusive.  He hasn’t invested his time to know her and understand her, instead he’s bullying and disrespecting her constantly causing her to shut down even more.  I really think he wants things to work out but he’s not putting in the proper effort for that to happen.
Jessica needs to stop her whining.  She goes into victim mode every time they have a conversation, it’s very annoying.  She doesn’t speak up for herself but explodes at random times about whatever she’s holding in.  We teach a man how we want to be treated through conversations, she just expects him to know, it doesn’t work that way.  Also, there should have been a meal on that table when he got home not a pile of magazines, especially since she told him that she would cook for him instead of ordering out every day, that just added fuel to whatever nonsense was going on between them.
The money issues should have been discussed off camera, I don’t like to air out my dirty laundry in front of the world so I can see why he reacted the way he did, it was not okay, but I understand why he got upset.
Next week things seem to get even worse.  But I still have hope that they can work their issues and become better people for each other.

I was ok the way Ryan mentioned Jessica (not) cooking. They agreed that she would cook, so they can save money. To me it also seemed that Ryan thinks that Jess isn't making an efford (not opening up, communicating, sticking to their agreements such as cooking). I also don't understand why Jess blew up the way she did, when he mentioned it, I was like wth happened,  when I was watching it. A lot of it must have landed on the cutting room floor because her reaction made no sense to me.
Jess accusing Ryan of just taking the money because he is low on cash was way out of line. I would be insulted, too. To me, it did sound like she was accusing him of stealing it. No one wants someone to think they have no morals and be that kind of person, especially not their significant other. If I were Ryan, I woould have blown up as well and I would be hurt and start pulling away. Also, this is a conversation to have in private, not in front of the cameras...
I'm not saying that Ryan is perfect, he sure isn't. He could let her speak without interrupting, immediately blowing up and leaving. Maybe he could count to ten before replying.
I still think that they are both willing to make it work but have no idea how to communicate. If they can find a way to talk and listen to each other they would me a good match. This is of course all IMO.

IMO it's just fine that Jessica outed him about taking the money. He didn't have any problem big talking about how much money he spends on food. $18,000 a year!!! He's either lying about that or he's living way beyond his means. Which should scare Jessica. I actually think a lot of things about Ryan have scared Jessica and it just makes her tendency to be a door mat and not speak up more prevalent.

IMO Ryan is a pig. He's been so disrespectful and borderline abusive and his playground analogy to justify it is ridiculous and shows how immature he is emotionally.

I've seen this dynamic before in RL and honestly I don't see these 2 lasting unless they seek out the experts and really take their advice to heart and put in the work. It's going to take a lot of work.

traveler - I agree with you about pretty much everything! I'd love a *like* button!

Last nights episode was edited odd. Their fight was out of sequence... Ryan comes home from work they talk about having sushi again for dinner, and then have a bit of a disagreement. Next we see them celebrating New Years Eve, and at the end of the episode it's back to them eating sushi with the same clothes from the earlier scene. They must have kissed and made up because that argument was before NYE, because on the table Jessica had the NYE decorations unopened.