Bachelor 19 - Chris Soules - Discussion - #2

MiniDiva wrote:He obviously was in love Sheena but not necessarily comparing the girls to Sheena but her unwillingness to stay in Iowa with him. (not slighting Sheena) He harped on livng in Iowa requirement through out the Bachelor as his prerequisite for romance, IMO.  So if he is not in love with Whitney, he needs to let her go find a man who does.

I think it's a combination of both. He wants someone he feels as strongly about as he did about his ex, but who is also willing to move to the farm, because that's why the relationship with his ex failed. And that's probably like looking for a needle in a haystack, since he seems to be attracted to career-oriented women rather than homemakers. Whitney is willing to move to the farm, or at least says she is, but that's not necessarily enough, if his feelings aren't where he wants them to be.

I don't doubt that he was the one who ended the engagement with Sheena, but that was after years of long distance, when he/they finally accepted that they couldn't reach a compromise. It doesn't seem like it was a matter of falling out of love or the relationship fizzling. They just wanted different things and it wasn't gonna change, so they went their separate ways. He met her in college, so I think they broke up in 2010 maybe. That vid was clearly made near the end and he still wanted it to work. Then he spent 4+ years trying to find someone he could love as much, so I'm just a bit sceptical about him finding it on a TV show with only one viable option.

So that's what Chris looks like when he's in love...what a difference, IMO

MiniDiva wrote:He obviously was in love Sheena but not necessarily comparing the girls to Sheena but her unwillingness to stay in Iowa with him. (not slighting Sheena) He harped on livng in Iowa requirement through out the Bachelor as his prerequisite for romance, IMO.  So if he is not in love with Whitney, he needs to let her go find a man who does.

No offense, but I get why he doesn't. He is comfortable and doing whatever he wants and Whitney is giving and making sacrifices. He gets to keep it going at his "pace" and making his stupid excuses why he isn't more loving with her and she is putting up with it. Sorry ladies, but a man will only treat you as well as you expect to be treated. If you let him get away with treating you like less than you deserve of course he will keep doing it.

Sadly, I think Whitney doesn't want to be wrong so she is going to keep holding on. Just sad IMO. That video shows that when Chris is excited and loves someone he can show it and will. It was what some of us thought we saw with Becca and what I have failed to see in the little that I have paid attention since the show ended.

https://isualumblog.wordpress.com/2014/09/30/catching-up-how-i-spent-my-summer-vacation-3/

This article tells a little more about Sheena. I think she went to CA because of her love of the water. The paddle board business she started was after living in CA for a few years. She has actually has worked worked in pharmaceuticals for over 10 years.

omg that video!! i cant compare that video to chris/whitney though.. because C/S were together for so long so you can obviously tell and see the love that deep. i hope whitney the best though. they may be ready to settle but i hope they still have fun

california90 wrote:omg that video!! i cant compare that video to chris/whitney though.. because C/S were together for so long so you can obviously tell and see the love that deep. i hope whitney the best though. they may be ready to settle but i hope they still have fun

  The intimacy level between Chris & S would have just kept deepening over time. 

I think the one you marry needs to fulfill you beyond all that have come before. A rather simple definition of "not settling".  It isn't so much about comparison as it is about the love been greater therefore situating the past solidly in the past.

Since people have said it was Chris that ended the engagement, that bodes well for Whitney. Once DWTS is done then they can begin without the interference of all the time commitment Chris has made with appearing on the show that is time not spent with her.  A new relationship really is about time IMO... how it is used and how much a person is willing to commit to being there.

sfrank wrote:So that's what Chris looks like when he's in love...what a difference, IMO

I see a difference too. Always have. Something is off imo. TWT.

mindless wrote:Props for using one of my favourite David Gray songs, Chris!

Aw, that vid makes me sad for him. Seems like he really loved her.

Me too! He looked really happy there. It seemed that he was making a lot of effort to be with that girl.

MiniDiva wrote:I think that was Chris theme on the bachelor, someone who wouldn't be willing to stay in Iowa as home base which Sheena wasn't willing apparently after she wanted to be in Cali (don't have all the story).  But it apparently broke his heart and I think that is why we heard repeatedly that he wanted someone willing to live on the farm with him as their home base.  He has said he is free to travel at certain times and wanted to be able to do that and that video proves that he is a bit mobile and not stuck on the farm 100%.  

I believe Chris has a lot of love to give and will make a loving husband and father - can't wait to see him with his kids.   :cutesmile!:

ITA...I think he has been waiting for someone like Whitney and I agree that he will make wonderful father. There are good things ahead for them IMO and I want to have a front row seat. I still plan to crash their wedding!

Now I see why he was attracted to Jade. She and Sheena are very similar physically, imo.

I confess to not watching the entire 6+ minutes of the video, but I got the gist of it. I didn't find it to be sad at all. It's great that Chris has been in a long term, committed relationship with a woman that returned his love. He knows what love feels like and can distinguish between love and infatuation. He already knows what he will and won't compromise on in a committed relationship. Sounds like a man that is ready to find his wife, settle down and have a family. And maybe that is just what he is doing with Whitney. JMHO and TWT. :Chris:

^^ FLChica

Aww Chris. So cute. I think the ending of that relationship must have left a pretty big scar and I get why he'd have concerns about lives and dreams fitting together with anyone new.

I find Chris and Whitney to be such real, genuine people trying to make a go of love that I don't want to try to read anything into their degree of passion, chemistry or love for that matter. For them to figure out. I saw more outward showing of affection/excitement from Chris towards Becca, sure, but also know I can't judge from what I saw what is in his heart towards Whitney. I respect that he made his decision like a man considering real life needs, not as a teenager with a crush.

They are what I love to see come out of this show - nice, decent people (not perfect but none of us are) who do want to try to find a serious adult relationship.