Re: Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray Bachelorette 10 - Media - Twitter - General Discussion Thread #2

[BohemianNika]

Per BohemianNika:

But would you really use the words - humility, tact or compassion - to describe a successful lawyer?

OMY! I hope so--my son-in-law is all of those these. Maybe not all at the same time and all the time. He is pretty good though!

Hey, all 3 are great qualities in in-laws  I just prefer my layers a bit more on the ruthless side (not that I've ever needed one   )

[Ash2214]

^ particularly if the lawyer is a prosecutor, which Andi is. When she was the ADA, she was a gang prosecutor.

[Ash2214]

Wow, I give.  One year may not make a difference.  They can get married tomorrow.  Enjoy.  Again, not everything is a criticism, some is just a discussion.

Again, since I am being reminded that they should marry whenever, do we know what Andi is doing long term? 

Everyone is saying they are in the real world and have been much more than any other Bachelorette. I tend ot disagree, as my all time fav, Ashley actually went back to being a dentist in training and seeing patients, etc.  The stuff she would be doing in the real world, not just spending all of her time with JP. That to me is real world love.

If Andi can always just be with Josh and focus on Josh, great.  Perfect.  If Andi has to interact with others and Josh may not be there all the time to make it better, how do they get through that.  I know in the real world, there is conflict a lot.  I would think in the legal field you get even more conflict.  We have not seen Andi handle conflict well.

Can anyone anwser that actual question? What is Andi planning to do with her life? 

Truly, I won't care when they get married, I will just wish them good luck.

That's what I'm alluding to. We don't know them. They haven't really spoken out about their future plans other than they're staying in Atlanta and once both of their leases are up in September, they will have their own apartment instead of going back and forth to each other's. Since I don't know them or what their future plans are, I'm not going to sit here and talk about whether they should wait a year before a wedding or if they should get married in the next 4 months. Regardless, I still stand by the opinion of Josh and Andi having more real circumstances than any other couple. They were able to live with each other for almost three months before the finale aired. They got to know and experience more about each other that most couples from this show because they aren't able to do because for almost three months they see each other every couple of weeks for a couple of days.

My mother was laid off from her job five years ago and didn't find another job until a year later. Does this mean my parents weren't experiencing the real world because one parent was working and the other wasn't?

[Kashathediva]

IDK--my SIL is a successful litigator with an international law firm in NYC. I guess he is able to make his points, and be an all around compassionate, humble guy.  

[stuckinsc]

Wow, I give.  One year may not make a difference.  They can get married tomorrow.  Enjoy.  Again, not everything is a criticism, some is just a discussion.

Again, since I am being reminded that they should marry whenever, do we know what Andi is doing long term? 

Everyone is saying they are in the real world and have been much more than any other Bachelorette. I tend ot disagree, as my all time fav, Ashley actually went back to being a dentist in training and seeing patients, etc.  The stuff she would be doing in the real world, not just spending all of her time with JP. That to me is real world love.

If Andi can always just be with Josh and focus on Josh, great.  Perfect.  If Andi has to interact with others and Josh may not be there all the time to make it better, how do they get through that.  I know in the real world, there is conflict a lot.  I would think in the legal field you get even more conflict.  We have not seen Andi handle conflict well.

Can anyone anwser that actual question? What is Andi planning to do with her life? 

Truly, I won't care when they get married, I will just wish them good luck.

That's what I'm alluding to. We don't know them. They haven't really spoken out about their future plans other than they're staying in Atlanta and once both of their leases are up in September, they will have their own apartment instead of going back and forth to each other's. Since I don't know them or what their future plans are, I'm not going to sit here and talk about whether they should wait a year before a wedding or if they should get married in the next 4 months. Regardless, I still stand by the opinion of Josh and Andi having more real circumstances than any other couple. They were able to live with each other for almost three months before the finale aired. They got to know and experience more about each other that most couples from this show because  they aren't able to do because for almost three months they see each other every couple of weeks for a couple of days.

My mother was laid off from her job five years ago and didn't find another job until a year later. Does this mean my parents weren't experiencing the real world because one parent was working and the other wasn't?

I bet your mom was trying to find a new job everyday and believe that is very stressful and real life.  Andi is working out and waiting for her fiance to come home.  Not the same.

[emusha]

To me there was something "off" about Andi ever since she first appeared on Juan Pablo's season. She just seemed fake somehow and her light-hearted banter so forced. She also displayed a lot of insecurity for someone who claimed to be such a strong independent woman. It felt like she was always needing reassurance from Juan Pablo, which is strange because I don't think she ever really liked him. I didn't mind her ranting at JP though, because I was so bored of the season by then and didn't really like any of the people left, so at least it provided some entertainment. But I didn't want her as the Bachelorette, because she seemed like a fake ball-buster to me. Not to mention the stuff about "real men" and guns.

When her season started I wanted to give her a chance because I want to enjoy the show, but she still came off really fake to me in the beginning. I excused it though, because I know I'd be equally fake meeting 25 strangers looking to date me. I started appreciating her in the following episodes because it seemed like she tried to really get to know the guys, so much so that I found myself wondering what it is she wants or likes, because it seemed to never come up. I was even mostly siding with her on the Eric thing and thought they were a poor match, so there was no point keeping him around. I tried hard to ignore the strangeness of the talk with CH after and I was actually rooting for her until the finale. But then she showed her true colours once and for all and there are no more excuses left that I can think of. I just do not like her. At all.

I don't wish her unhappiness though, because that certainly doesn't improve a person, so I hope things with Josh work out. I will however be pissed if she gets a TV wedding and Desiree doesn't. I was never a big fan of Des, but she is one of the sweetest and most genuine leads ever and set a good example for young women everywhere by recognizing and accepting unconditional love. She deserves a TV wedding over Andi.

have been avoiding any of the bette threads since the finale but wanted to say ...from a "tried-really-hard-to-like-andi-then-got-shocked-at-discovering-meandi" to you, mindless, thanks for expressing exactly how I feel. Her behavior has been appalling to me but more so in the way of immaturity and needing real life lessons particularly around empathy, compassion, consideration, perceptiveness and courtesy (and I don't mean that in a patronizing way because I've learnt those lessons from failing and learning myself)

I also agree with you on the des front -- she's not my fave by any means but I do agree that she set a good enough example as a bette to not lose out on a tv wedding. I think JASH are my ultimate fave for being so authentic and mature in their approach.

[BohemianNika]

First off thanks for understanding my stance about Andi and I still want to apologize if I am saying unpleasant things about her.  

I use those words (humility tact or compassion) not to describe her being a lawyer or a reality tv personality but just just as  a human being who is about to 'break up' with someone or describing someone who is not a native english speaker.    Everybody goes by intuition and general feelings of  impression when dealing with other people specially educated professionals.  Granting we do not expect 'kindness' or 'class' from a scrupulous car salesmen or a rotten politician but still they need to at least not be regarded as a joke so people can still have a high regard of them.  

Do you want your friendly neighborhood  prosecutor to be a reality tv fame(ho)  who slept with two men in a span of days and openly made fun of a Venezuelan because he can't say "It's Okay" ya'll in a midwestern accent?   I wouldnt trust Andi to balance my checkbook much less prosecute criminals in any country.   If she cannot be fair to a  reality tv 'lover' or whatever you call Juan Pabs and Nick,  I wouldnt trust her to keep the peace in my neighborhood.   Honestly she's now a joke.  She'll probably better off selling a toygun that doubles as a squeegee in home tv shopping network.

Regarding Josh,  he will continue to be a butt of joke no  matter what he does.   What happened to him Andi and Nick is so emasculating that this is gonna be his reputation.  He won a wife from a dating game show who cannot respect what he had with her that she needs to sexually test drive the other man before she soils his bed.  

Her hubris and arrogance led to Nick spilling the beans.  A little humility and kindness could have gone a long way.

I respectfully disagree  I think there is no point to continue any discussion on Andi between the 2 of us. I would still like to touch on the JPG and Josh topics.

As a non native English speaker (hell, I've never even visited the US), I honestly believe that the language barrier wasn't the problem in JPG's season. That being said, even Andi admitted she wished she would've handled certain things with him differently.

Regarding Josh, I'm sorry you feel this way about him. I guess it all depends on your point of view. Andi never claimed to be a virgin. And Josh got the girl, even though she tested the goods with Nick (and yes, I believe she had feelings for Nick, just her feelings for Josh were stronger). Nothing emasculating about that. Actually, from where I stand, Josh should feel very good about himself. I mean, he must have done something really well, if she picked him   (can't belive I went there)

[Ash2214]

Wow, I give.  One year may not make a difference.  They can get married tomorrow.  Enjoy.  Again, not everything is a criticism, some is just a discussion.

Again, since I am being reminded that they should marry whenever, do we know what Andi is doing long term? 

Everyone is saying they are in the real world and have been much more than any other Bachelorette. I tend ot disagree, as my all time fav, Ashley actually went back to being a dentist in training and seeing patients, etc.  The stuff she would be doing in the real world, not just spending all of her time with JP. That to me is real world love.

If Andi can always just be with Josh and focus on Josh, great.  Perfect.  If Andi has to interact with others and Josh may not be there all the time to make it better, how do they get through that.  I know in the real world, there is conflict a lot.  I would think in the legal field you get even more conflict.  We have not seen Andi handle conflict well.

Can anyone anwser that actual question? What is Andi planning to do with her life? 

Truly, I won't care when they get married, I will just wish them good luck.

That's what I'm alluding to. We don't know them. They haven't really spoken out about their future plans other than they're staying in Atlanta and once both of their leases are up in September, they will have their own apartment instead of going back and forth to each other's. Since I don't know them or what their future plans are, I'm not going to sit here and talk about whether they should wait a year before a wedding or if they should get married in the next 4 months. Regardless, I still stand by the opinion of Josh and Andi having more real circumstances than any other couple. They were able to live with each other for almost three months before the finale aired. They got to know and experience more about each other that most couples from this show because  they aren't able to do because for almost three months they see each other every couple of weeks for a couple of days.

My mother was laid off from her job five years ago and didn't find another job until a year later. Does this mean my parents weren't experiencing the real world because one parent was working and the other wasn't?

I bet your mom was trying to find a new job everyday and believe that is very stressful and real life.  Andi is working out and waiting for her fiance to come home.  Not the same.

How do we know that's what Andi is doing? She could possibly be looking into job opportunities. Heck, she could be applying for jobs and she might already have something in the works. Considering we don't know them personally and aren't around them 24 hours a day, Andi could be doing many things that we don't know about. In my opinion as well, real life just doesn't solely focus on having a job. If I chose to be a stay at home mom and not work (which I'm not doing) does that mean I wouldn't know what it's like to be in the real world? Experiencing loss and also gaining new things is real life. You can experience a loss and a gain with many different things, not just solely in the workplace. I'm all for commenting on the actions of people that happened while on the show, but I personally and in my opinion just can't do it when it involves personal stuff that I know nothing about.

[emusha]

Per BohemianNika:

But would you really use the words - humility, tact or compassion - to describe a successful lawyer?

OMY! I hope so--my son-in-law is all of those these. Maybe not all at the same time and all the time. He is pretty good though!

Hey, all 3 are great qualities in in-laws  I just prefer my layers a bit more on the ruthless side (not that I've ever needed one   )

ohh really? this is interesting...maybe there are these kinds of expectations from Andi's profession that requires ruthlessness and encourages her self-absorbed brattiness... even though I don't find it surprising that these traits might have overflowed over into her work life and her co-workers might not have found it appealing.

to be perfectly honest I actually think Andi might be going through the growing-pains of moving from being very sheltered to being trained for a career then popping out into the real world with not great people's skills...the real world is a big place of life lessons and I wouldn't be shocked at all if Andi's rough edges start to get refined over the coming 2 years or so...being in a relationship with a guy whose family won't let him take cray cray might help though his attitude doesn't seem to be that great of help in his current honeymoon phase we shall see I guess... *shrugs*

[stuckinsc]

I have no desire to keep discussing what happened on the show.  We made fun of Nick for not letting go, well, I am ready to let go of the season as well.  Monday will be four weeks from the AFTR, so really nothing new and nothing that hasn't been talked about backward, forward, up, down and sideways.

I prefer to talk about the future. 

I am moving on like many made fun of Nick for not doing.  I hope we can talk about the couple post show and not keep dragging up the past.  

In the past Josh was chosen by Andi and they are all but living together.

Now, I prefer to talk about their future.

You may talk about anything you chose.

[Ash2214]

I have no desire to keep discussing what happened on the show.  We made fun of Nick for not letting go, well, I am ready to let go of the season as well.  Monday will be four weeks from the AFTR, so really nothing new and nothing that hasn't been talked about backward, forward, up, down and sideways.

I prefer to talk about the future. 

I am moving on like many made fun of Nick for not doing.  I hope we can talk about the couple post show and not keep dragging up the past.  

In the past Josh was chosen by Andi and they are all but living together.

Now, I prefer to talk about their future.

You may talk about anything you chose.

To be fair, Andi is still facing a lot of hate in regards to what she did on the show too. She's being treated the same way. I'd prefer to talk about the future as well, although I just won't hate on her for currently not working and being in the real world, when other things can happen in real life that don't focus solely on having a job or not. Many contestants and leads from this show not work either right away. It's not like Andi is some sort of enigma in that regard.

[aviej]

Wow, I give.  One year may not make a difference.  They can get married tomorrow.  Enjoy.  Again, not everything is a criticism, some is just a discussion.

Again, since I am being reminded that they should marry whenever, do we know what Andi is doing long term? 

Everyone is saying they are in the real world and have been much more than any other Bachelorette. I tend ot disagree, as my all time fav, Ashley actually went back to being a dentist in training and seeing patients, etc.  The stuff she would be doing in the real world, not just spending all of her time with JP. That to me is real world love.

If Andi can always just be with Josh and focus on Josh, great.  Perfect.  If Andi has to interact with others and Josh may not be there all the time to make it better, how do they get through that.  I know in the real world, there is conflict a lot.  I would think in the legal field you get even more conflict.  We have not seen Andi handle conflict well.

Can anyone anwser that actual question? What is Andi planning to do with her life? 

Truly, I won't care when they get married, I will just wish them good luck.

That's what I'm alluding to. We don't know them. They haven't really spoken out about their future plans other than they're staying in Atlanta and once both of their leases are up in September, they will have their own apartment instead of going back and forth to each other's. Since I don't know them or what their future plans are, I'm not going to sit here and talk about whether they should wait a year before a wedding or if they should get married in the next 4 months. Regardless, I still stand by the opinion of Josh and Andi having more real circumstances than any other couple. They were able to live with each other for almost three months before the finale aired. They got to know and experience more about each other that most couples from this show because  they aren't able to do because for almost three months they see each other every couple of weeks for a couple of days.

My mother was laid off from her job five years ago and didn't find another job until a year later. Does this mean my parents weren't experiencing the real world because one parent was working and the other wasn't?

I bet your mom was trying to find a new job everyday and believe that is very stressful and real life.  Andi is working out and waiting for her fiance to come home.  Not the same.

Wow! Didn't know that there was paparrazi to follow Andi to know exactly how she spends every minute of her time. You know what though, what is wrong with people taking some time off to themselves. Just putting 100% into building a solid foundation and marriage. When people work, sometimes they get so caught up with everything else they forget about each other. I say, lay the foundation and everything else could come afterwards. So long as they have bread and butter on the table, who cares how they occupy their time.

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