Bachelorette 10 - Andi Dorfman - Episode 10 - MTP-LCD-FRC- July 28/14 *Spoilers & Sleuthing* #2 - Discussion

Really, when?

Rosepetal wrote:It is as simple as this Andi slept with a guy she might be getting engaged to because the one she really wanted hadn't said he loved her but was falling in love with her. The "I love you" from Josh didn't come until the fantasy date. Up to that time she was still skeptical because  Josh had already told her the next person he said "I.L.U" was the one he was going to marry and he hadn't told her that yet. If he didn't tell her IMO Josh might have been F-2. This whole season has been about Andi trusting Josh with her heart. She didn't get the reassurance until the fantasy date with Josh. If he had told her sooner Nick might not have even got to F-2.

ITA plus it's not just her real fear of Josh bailing, but she is under pressure from tptb and herself to get a guy to propose and if he was going to bail, she needed to have a back up plan for the show. They're paying her for this, it's not just for funsies.

But she needed to handle atfr better imo. She hates to play along when she's not feeling it and it bit her this time. She should have acted all contrite and "I know, life is hard for Nick, my deepest sympathies on his struggles," and that might have fed his ego and kept him quiet. I don't know why she didn't really. She needed to have a feeling this might happen when he started to post about how the fs was too hot to handle and dear ol mom & dad won't let Bella watch blahblah. I guess she thought he wouldn't go there regardless of how she acted, maybe she's been coddled and doted on now for too long so she forgot what some real jerks are like

Sometimes we have to really think about what we are watching. :Nod:
It's like the audience has been just as brainwashed as the cast in the bubble. 
Under normal circumstances we would never do half the things (or even one or two) that are considered acceptable with this show. (I'm thinking of repelling down Mohegan Sun--nah spa time for me, having a 1:1 date with a pantseneur--really??, and having sex with possibly 3 different people that are basically strangers just because it's fantasy time and maybe someone said ILY--seriously?)
It's not the time factor that has me laughing as much as the things done that under regular circumstances would never be considered.
I have to wonder how many of the cast come home and have a WTF moment and say what was I thinking?   
I am amazed this show has lasted as long as it has. Amazed.  

Please do not be so descriptive with choices of words, it's totally not necessary.

Thank you.

Kashathediva wrote:Sometimes we have to really think about what we are watching. :Nod:
It's like the audience has been just as brainwashed as the cast in the bubble. 
Under normal circumstances we would never do half the things (or even one or two) that are considered acceptable with this show. (I'm thinking of repelling down Mohegan Sun--nah spa time for me, having a 1:1 date with a pantseneur--really??, and having sex with possibly 3 different people that are basically strangers just because it's fantasy time and maybe someone said ILY--seriously?)
It's not the time factor that has me laughing as much as the things done that under regular circumstances would never be considered.
I have to wonder how many of the cast come home and have a WTF moment and say what was I thinking?   
I am amazed this show has lasted as long as it has. Amazed.  

There is something profound and relatable in the search for love.

I watched some of those Married at First Sight episodes on my iPad the other day when I was traveling (thank you Comcast) and was so sucked into the psychology of it all. I find it so interesting how pairing the right two people brings about transformative changes, when the formula works.

I had that "AHA" moment for Andi/Josh (see my old post about that) on his hometown.  All of a sudden I "got" Josh -- and saw a nurturing side of Andi he brought out.  She is his GameChanger and vice versa.  They make each other so much better, and they will for a long, long time come, I just see it.

This show is misogynistic crap (see my thousands of FORT posts on the topic, LOL!), but when it works, I have to hand it to them.  Josh said this in the last episode -- the process worked.  When he let his walls down, and told her he'd love her forever, he changed her forever.

Watch the feet?  They were on each other's doorstep every day since filming wrapped.  Not a showmance.

I personally suspect his family gave him a talking to at HTD and said, boy if you want her, you've got to tell her without regard to what she tells you.  That's how love works.  When you freely give it, you get it.  And that was the (pivotal) scene on the bench in Santo Domingo, and the "I'll put up with you/will you put up with me" pledge at FD dinner).

Compare to Nick, for his part, who was holding back on that unconditional love right up to the very end.  I don't think it was ever real love.  It was "please be my girlfriend in Chicago after filming wraps" love.  Attachment, romance, and maybe the beginnings, but he was nowhere near ready to commit his whole self. (Who would be in that format ...)

One time, years ago, I was saying goodbye to a great female pal at work, and by complete mistake, I said "I love you" as I was saying goodbye.  Honest, she was a great dear friend, but it was just this weird thing that I said by mistake I don't know why.  From that minute forward, she's been my #1 friend.  Like I'm not kidding, by saying those words out loud (which sort of fit, as we were attached-at-the-hip allies/friends/pals at work) I transformed our friendship inadvertently.

It's in the Bible ... it actually is a real thing!

jlccaz wrote:

Kashathediva wrote:Sometimes we have to really think about what we are watching. :Nod:
It's like the audience has been just as brainwashed as the cast in the bubble. 
Under normal circumstances we would never do half the things (or even one or two) that are considered acceptable with this show. (I'm thinking of repelling down Mohegan Sun--nah spa time for me, having a 1:1 date with a pantseneur--really??, and having sex with possibly 3 different people that are basically strangers just because it's fantasy time and maybe someone said ILY--seriously?)
It's not the time factor that has me laughing as much as the things done that under regular circumstances would never be considered.
I have to wonder how many of the cast come home and have a WTF moment and say what was I thinking?   
I am amazed this show has lasted as long as it has. Amazed.  

There is something profound and relatable in the search for love.

I watched some of those Married at First Sight episodes on my iPad the other day when I was traveling (thank you Comcast) and was so sucked into the psychology of it all.  I find it so interesting how pairing the right two people brings about transformative changes, when the formula works.

I had that "AHA" moment for Andi/Josh (see my old post about that) on his hometown.  All of a sudden I "got" Josh -- and saw a nurturing side of Andi he brought out.  She is his GameChanger and vice versa.  They make each other so much better, and they will for a long, long time come, I just see it.

This show is misogynistic crap (see my thousands of FORT posts on the topic, LOL!), but when it works, I have to hand it to them.  Josh said this in the last episode -- the process worked.  When he let his walls down, and told her he'd love her forever, he changed her forever.

Watch the feet?  They were on each other's doorstep every day since filming wrapped.  Not a showmance.

I personally suspect his family gave him a talking to at HTD and said, boy if you want her, you've got to tell her without regard to what she tells you.  That's how love works.  When you freely give it, you get it.  And that was the (pivotal) scene on the bench in Santo Domingo, and the "I'll put up with you/will you put up with me" pledge at FD dinner).

Compare to Nick, for his part, who was holding back on that unconditional love right up to the very end.  I don't think it was ever real love.  It was "please be my girlfriend in Chicago after filming wraps" love.  Attachment, romance, and maybe the beginnings, but he was nowhere near ready to commit his whole self.  (Who would be in that format ...)

One time, years ago, I was saying goodbye to a great female pal at work, and by complete mistake, I said "I love you" as I was saying goodbye.  Honest, she was a great dear friend, but it was just this weird thing that I said by mistake I don't know why.  From that minute forward, she's been my #1 friend.  Like I'm not kidding, by saying those words out loud (which sort of fit, as we were attached-at-the-hip allies/friends/pals at work) I transformed our friendship inadvertently.

It's in the Bible ... it actually is a real thing!

Oh my goodness, this post just made me tear up How well said.

Kashathediva wrote:Sometimes we have to really think about what we are watching. :Nod:
It's like the audience has been just as brainwashed as the cast in the bubble. 
Under normal circumstances we would never do half the things (or even one or two) that are considered acceptable with this show. (I'm thinking of repelling down Mohegan Sun--nah spa time for me, having a 1:1 date with a pantseneur--really??, and having sex with possibly 3 different people that are basically strangers just because it's fantasy time and maybe someone said ILY--seriously?)
It's not the time factor that has me laughing as much as the things done that under regular circumstances would never be considered.
I have to wonder how many of the cast come home and have a WTF moment and say what was I thinking?   
I am amazed this show has lasted as long as it has. Amazed.  

Thanks for bringing me back over to the boards. We still don't all agree, but we know that won't happen ever. It would be boring. Things may get heated from time to time, but the Admin and Mods do a great job of keeping the peace. Hope to maybe be snarking spoiled next season. Just depends of who they choose. One I won't watch, one I will be spoiled, one I will be snarking spoiled, and one I'm undecided.  

I am so tempted to attempt unspoiled. It seems super fun.

jlccazz, You are taking my exact thoughts and writing them much better then I could! Love your last posts!

jlccaz wrote:I am so tempted to attempt unspoiled.  It seems super fun.

The more the merrier. Once the new Bachelor is announced I'd like to see who is interested in being unspoiled. A lot of people have said this and I think it would be interesting to see who is willing to give it a try. I have not been spoiled since Em's season and it's definitely an interesting way to watch when you understand enough about the edit and the workings of TPTB.

GrahamGal wrote:

jlccaz wrote:I am so tempted to attempt unspoiled.  It seems super fun.

The more the merrier.  Once the new Bachelor is announced I'd like to see who is interested in being unspoiled.  A lot of people have said this and I think it would be interesting to see who is willing to give it a try.  I have not been spoiled since Em's season and it's definitely an interesting way to watch when you understand enough about the edit and the workings of TPTB.

If I can't maintain a diet and exercise program, how will I ever avoid clicking on those OTHER THREADS though!!!!! Maybe I will do all three next year, as a triple play New Years resolution.

jlccaz wrote:

GrahamGal wrote:

jlccaz wrote:I am so tempted to attempt unspoiled.  It seems super fun.

The more the merrier.  Once the new Bachelor is announced I'd like to see who is interested in being unspoiled.  A lot of people have said this and I think it would be interesting to see who is willing to give it a try.  I have not been spoiled since Em's season and it's definitely an interesting way to watch when you understand enough about the edit and the workings of TPTB.

If I can't maintain a diet and exercise program, how will I ever avoid clicking on those OTHER THREADS though!!!!!  Maybe I will do all three next year, as a triple play New Years resolution.

jlccaz, will you accept this rose?  

I've stalked your profile and found your old posts! *slowclap*