Re: The Bachelorette 10 - *Final 1-F2* - Speculation * Sleuthing - Spoilers Thread #3

[luvlady345]

I guess everyone is different I am very type A personality an I need to know from the start what type of man I with..... If Andi is a diva/brat there is no way she is going to be able to keep that at bay, she may mellow out a little but her man has got to be able to handle her or she is going to run all over him..

[SueSt]

I think Nick brings out the softer side of Andi because he really listens to her and makes her feel heard. He’s not pushing an agenda or defending himself and is not afraid to admit when he’s wrong (which he was in the group date). This puts Andi at ease so she doesn’t have to argue with him like a Diva.

On the other hand, in no way do I think Nick is a push over. He is asking for what wants (more time) in a way that does not make Andi feel like he’s calling her out or attacking her (vs. Eric calling her fake). And in the preview he says he will not propose unless he knows he’s the only one. So he has his limits… but is shown to be able to diffuse Andi’s high-strung personality in a way that puts her at ease…

They balance each other.

[stuckinsc]

I guess everyone is different I am very type A personality an I need to know from the start what type of man I with..... If Andi is a diva/brat there is no way she is going to be able to keep that at bay, she may mellow out a little but her man has got to be able to handle her or she is going to run all over him..

Actually, the best gift my husband gave to me was not having to be in control. Before him, I always, always needed control. My life growing up was very out of control, so it was like I couldn't survive if I didn't have control. It was a joy to me to meet him and not have to control everything. It is truly a gift to have a person I can trust enough to not need to fix everything or make it right.

I am not saying either is this for Andi, just my observation as a reformed control freak.

[Ash2214]

For me, the biggest reason Andi was apparently "MeAndi" with Josh was because she was upset Josh didn't feel the same way about her that she felt about him. It was evident, in my opinion, on a few separate instances. When he got upset with her about the lie detector test she was taken back by it. He didn't like it because he felt like they had finally built some trust on their 1-on-1 date and the next time he sees her he needed to take a lie detector test. That whole meltdown of her crying was because of what transpired with Josh.

The only other time I've seen her be a little diva-ish, but i wouldn't even call it that, was when Josh wouldn't say he was falling in love with her. Again, she was thinking he didn't feel the same way about her. Since he stated he was falling in love with her, I never saw her be this supposed "MeAndi." I've seen her be really happy with Josh, but the instances where she was worried really showed a lot about her feelings.

There's no way that no one can get a little upset or irked in a relationship. It's bound to happen. From what I've seen, Josh does a good job of not letting her walk all over him, but also be quite caring and can diffuse her too.

[Kashathediva]

I guess everyone is different I am very type A personality an I need to know from the start what type of man I with..... If Andi is a diva/brat there is no way she is going to be able to keep that at bay, she may mellow out a little but her man has got to be able to handle her or she is going to run all over him..

Actually, the best gift my husband gave to me was not having to be in control.  Before him, I always, always needed control.  My life growing up was very out of control, so it was like I couldn't survive if I didn't have control.  It was a joy to me to meet him and not have to control everything.  It is truly a gift to have a person I can trust enough to not need to fix everything or make it right.  

I am not saying either is this for Andi, just my observation as a reformed control freak.

Ditto. Been there and doing it.  
There are definitely power struggles at times, but overall tasks are divided. I take care of what I do best and trust him when it comes to taking care what he does best. It's a nice balance.

[happygolucky]

For me, the biggest reason Andi was apparently "MeAndi" with Josh was because she was upset Josh didn't feel the same way about her that she felt about him.

Well, that's the point that some of us -Nick's fans- make when we are saying that with Nick Andi doesn't feel the need to be MeAndi, because he knows how to talk to her, so that she listens and understands. They are on the same wave-length, they get each other, so she doesn't need to put the tough MeAndi role on.

With Josh, their communication is different, I'm not saying is wrong or that could cause problems, because I don't know that. But to me it looks like if Josh says A, Andi hears B, ... maybe at the end they do see eye to eye. So I guess, it's not bad to be on a different wave-length as long there is a willingness to find a meeting point. Josh, I've seen him be very open. Andi to me on the other hand in all of this is still an enigma.

[Rolly]

I guess everyone is different I am very type A personality an I need to know from the start what type of man I with..... If Andi is a diva/brat there is no way she is going to be able to keep that at bay, she may mellow out a little but her man has got to be able to handle her or she is going to run all over him..

Actually, the best gift my husband gave to me was not having to be in control.  Before him, I always, always needed control.  My life growing up was very out of control, so it was like I couldn't survive if I didn't have control.  It was a joy to me to meet him and not have to control everything.  It is truly a gift to have a person I can trust enough to not need to fix everything or make it right.  

I am not saying either is this for Andi, just my observation as a reformed control freak.

This is me exactly... it's a burden to have to always be in control and a gift when someone else takes that on!  

[Ash2214]

For me, the biggest reason Andi was apparently "MeAndi" with Josh was because she was upset Josh didn't feel the same way about her that she felt about him.

Well, that's the point that some of us -Nick's fans- make when we are saying that with Nick Andi doesn't feel the need to be MeAndi, because he knows how to talk to her, so that she listens and understands. They are on the same wave-length, they get each other, so she doesn't need to put the tough MeAndi role on.

With Josh, their communication is different, I'm not saying is wrong or that could cause problems, because I don't know that. But to me it looks like if Josh says A, Andi hears B, ... maybe at the end they do see eye to eye. So I guess, it's not bad to be on a different wave-length as long there is a willingness to find a meeting point. Josh, I've seen him be very open. Andi to me on the other hand in all of this is still an enigma.

See, I don't think it's because of their form of communication. Josh just wasn't going to rush saying he was falling in love with her. He was the last one to do it, which I appreciate because it's silly to begin with thinking people can fall in love with someone in a matter of a few weeks without much time with that person. Andi was just worried because since he wasn't saying it and every other guy was, she was assuming he didn't feel that way, which she clearly wanted him too, and once he admitted to falling in love with her in Ghent, I haven't seen her seen act the way she was in the beginning of the season with him.

It's not because Nick or Josh communicate one way with her in my opinion. It was just that Andi wanted Josh to say he loved her. In my opinion, once she got it, it was full steam ahead.

[stuckinsc]

For me, the biggest reason Andi was apparently "MeAndi" with Josh was because she was upset Josh didn't feel the same way about her that she felt about him.

Well, that's the point that some of us -Nick's fans- make when we are saying that with Nick Andi doesn't feel the need to be MeAndi, because he knows how to talk to her, so that she listens and understands. They are on the same wave-length, they get each other, so she doesn't need to put the tough MeAndi role on.

With Josh, their communication is different, I'm not saying is wrong or that could cause problems, because I don't know that. But to me it looks like if Josh says A, Andi hears B, ... maybe at the end they do see eye to eye. So I guess, it's not bad to be on a different wave-length as long there is a willingness to find a meeting point. Josh, I've seen him be very open. Andi to me on the other hand in all of this is still an enigma.

I was a huge Josh fan pre-season. I love the Murrays in general, all three children are pretty great human beings, so kudos to both Momma and Papa Murray, they did their jobs well.

This is what bugged me the whole season with Andi and Josh. Josh never hid his feelings from Andi, EVER! The whole doubt and crap was her putting her baggage on him. He was all in first thing out of the limo, which some have found strange, but he was never not sure if he wanted Andi and never hesitated to let her know that he wanted her.

If Andi was unsure of Josh it was all on Andi and is the reason I became Team Nick. It was a joy to watch Andi be nice and not all ADA with Nick. Nick brought out a fun and happy Andi I still don't completely see with Josh. Not Josh's fault at all, it is all on Andi. I believe that something still keeps Andi from fully believing in Josh, again not his fault. If that talk in the LCD isn't how she used to have a hard time trusting him or what ever and is a current thing, then I will think she is an idiot to chose him. If you have that much doubt before you get engaged, then you shouldn't do it. Date a while or whatever, but you shouldn't have that little voice in our head keeping you from being fully happy if this guy is really the one.

I still like Josh, though the last month and the over fandom of Josh has made it harder for me, but I believe he is the guy I saw before all of this and the one described by people who know him, not the edited man that has been seen on my tv. I just think he deserves better than a woman who holds the mistakes of others against him.

[luvlady345]

I guess everyone is different I am very type A personality an I need to know from the start what type of man I with..... If Andi is a diva/brat there is no way she is going to be able to keep that at bay, she may mellow out a little but her man has got to be able to handle her or she is going to run all over him..

Actually, the best gift my husband gave to me was not having to be in control.  Before him, I always, always needed control.  My life growing up was very out of control, so it was like I couldn't survive if I didn't have control.  It was a joy to me to meet him and not have to control everything.  It is truly a gift to have a person I can trust enough to not need to fix everything or make it right.  

I am not saying either is this for Andi, just my observation as a reformed control freak.

This is me exactly... it's a burden to have to always be in control and a gift when someone else takes that on!  

EXACTLY, that's why YES MEN need not apply for me..

[Woodyallen90210]

I think what Nick means when he says if she doesn't find a way to tell me on the LCD that she is in love with me then we won't get engaged is that if she doesn't give him some reassurance, he will know he is not the one. Not that he won't propose.

[Guest]

I think Nick brings out the softer side of Andi because he really listens to her and makes her feel heard.  He’s not pushing an agenda or defending himself and is not afraid to admit when he’s wrong (which he was in the group date).  This puts Andi at ease so she doesn’t have to argue with him like a Diva.  
[/b]
On the other hand, in no way do I think Nick is a push over.  He is asking for what wants (more time) in a way that does not make Andi feel like he’s calling her out or attacking her (vs. Eric calling her fake).  And in the preview he says he will not propose unless he knows he’s the only one.  So he has his limits… but is shown to be able to diffuse Andi’s high-strung personality in a way that puts her at ease…

They balance each other.

Love the bolded! This is what I have seen too and what I have liked so much with Andi and Nick. Similarly with Marcus, Andi was softer, more easy going and relaxed to me. I know so many here see that with Josh, but I've seen such a more relaxed, trusting Andi having great discussions with some of the others. In the long term, I think that's what she will need. I totally see that she's most into Josh and don't doubt he's her choice but I've seen more of an adult relationship that I could relate to with Nick. With Josh I feel like she's a high school girl wanting to get the great-looking quarterback because he's a prize, but also kind of blaming him that he's too great of a prize to be trusted.   

It's great if Josh can manage her, but for how long does someone want to manage someone who seems to think it's cute and funny to describe herself as a bratty diva who likes mind games? Good luck to all after the show.

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