Bachelorette 10 - Andi Dorfman - Episode 9 - Fantasy Dates - July 14/14 *Spoilers & Sleuthing* - Discussion

The paper article is longer and the cuddling etc is referring to post FRC PDA.

IF it is Josh, he maynot have sex until marriage, hence the nightmare;)

Andi needs a huge ring due to her masculine looking hands. I wouldn't want to use her hands to advertise a ring.

jlccaz wrote:The paper article is longer and the cuddling etc is referring to post FRC PDA.

What else does the article say?

noobsleuth wrote:I don't believe Josh hasn't dated/been in a relationship in 5 years. How can you not be interested in a woman for 5 years and not even dated especially when you have a desire to find the one? If anything, he has talked to a slew of women, but none of them have worked out... which isn't surprising as that happens a lot. The thought that he never thought about another woman in 5 years and all of a sudden comes on this highly produced TV show and finds is soulmate is silly to me. There are plenty of professional athletes who have wives and families and their wives are very much active and supportive in their career. Having a career in the armed forces isn't conducive to having a family, but I know there are plenty that make it work.

[b]I just wish there was a little bit more truth to Josh's edit because I don't see anything to be ashamed of by it. He tried to play pro ball and didn't see it going anywhere (big deal it happens to thousands of others) so he made a wonderful decision to go back to school and get his degree (how this is isn't appealing to TPTB I have no idea). Now he has a steady, good job and adores and supports his family.

Love isn't all sunshine and rainbows... sometimes it's messy. In Andi's case I can't help but think it has to be messy and bumpy because of her personality. Either give her the real Josh or let her ride off into the sunset with the arrogant, shrewd, and sneaky guy who is almost the exact version of herself.

I'm a few pages behind but    and    to this whole post especially the bolds.

That is not how I read the article at all. The cuddling I inferred to be the FS, but I will go back and read it. Either way it still points to Josh because of the trip to Mexico recently she took with her final 1.

Ash2214 wrote:

eliza3 wrote:When did Josh's mother have health issues?  I have wondered if that played a part in his leaving baseball and spending time with Aaron and Stephanie?  If so, I can see that he would not want to explain that to the general public on a reality show.

Both his mom and dad had cancer at one point.

Didin't know that. I respect the wish to keep it private. But I feel like the show may be doing a great disservice to Josh by not presenting him as a mature, devoted, caregiver. If I didn't read this board I wouldn't know any of this stuff and would think he seemed shady. I guess I might be just falling for an edit, so it's too bad they can't show more of his redeeming qualities beyond him having chemistry with Andi.

I often see comparisons to JP and Ashley (THE love story of the this whole series, never to be duplicated IMO only, because we really saw it happen and it couldn't be hidden or edited away). I do see that same obvious undeniable chemistry with Andi and Josh, but I would stop any comparisons there personally. JP and Ashley were already so good at communicating, at dealing with issues, at being on each other's side, at talking and at laughing together. They were so in sync on every level right from the start. These are the things I worry about with Andi and Josh. I do with them luck and hope this was the start of a great love for each of them, but wasn't one I've fallen in love with watching. Still waiting for that to happen again since Jash, don't expect it to, but hope for it every season. I'm glad for the people who love the couple each year, because it is fun when you really fall for the couple, not just an individual.

^^^The one comment I have, relaxing, is that we are shown this "edit" of Josh and Andi not communicating in my opinion more so than with any other.  I don't believe their communication is lacking that much in contrast to the others.  We know that they didn't communicate well during the lie detector conversation and that Andi was really upset by it by all appearances with the earlier preview they showed of her complete meltdown about too good to be true, there are no fairy tales, etc.  This same part of that preview, however, was not aired during the episode itself.   At some point during the cocktail party (or even before their talk/fight officially concluded), they seem to have smoothed things over because Josh received the first (maybe it was 2nd) rose but the episode didn't present it that way at all.  More Drama.  They both were all smiles.   As with the other guys and what normally happens, a lot of substantive stuff has hit the cutting room floor for Josh and Andi that does not promote drama about their relationship, their communication beyond insane chemistry, etc.  IMO.

Piper61 wrote:^^^The one comment I have, relaxing, is that we are shown this "edit" of Josh and Andi not communicating in my opinion more so than with any other.  I don't believe their communication is lacking that much in contrast to the others.  We know that they didn't communicate well during the lie detector conversation and that Andi was really upset by it by all appearances with the earlier preview they showed of her complete meltdown about too good to be true, there are no airy tales, etc.  This same part of that preview, however, was not aired during the episode itself.   At some point during the cocktail party (or even before their talk/fight officially concluded), they seem to have smoothed things over because Josh received the first (maybe it was 2nd) rose but the episode didn't present it that way at all.  More Drama.  They both were all smiles.   As with the other guys and what normally happens, a lot of substantive stuff has hit the cutting room floor for Josh and Andi that does not promote drama about their relationship, their communication beyond insane chemistry, etc.  IMO.

ITA.

Andi started icing Josh out the moment Josh appeared. He had to break through a lot of walls and defenses and preconceived notions before she became herself with him. All of their beginning conversations were Josh trying to figure out what he already did wrong because she was subtly being so icy and guarded with him. It wasn't until their 1:1 when she finally caved to his pressure and told him the truth about the cheating.

Andi was being subtle enough being on guard imo that if he really wanted to be the next Bach or didn't care about her, he could have ignored it, ridden the wave all the way to f3 because of course he was going to be at least f3 no matter what unless he was a total putz, and then became the next Bach no issues. No, instead, he figured out all the random insecurities she had dreamed up to have about him and then proceeded to figure out how to put them to rest because she's the one he wants for real (I think).

When he was frustrated during their lie detector debacle, Andi was pressing him for an ifly because any frustration he may be experiencing automatically equaled that he's leaving and breaking her heart ASAP. I didn't get the sense that Josh even knew that the correct answer was I LOVE YOU to her escalating the fight like that with him.

So from what I've seen, I think when Andi is being normal, their communication is just fine. I don't know how Josh ever could have communicated with someone who decided right off the bat that he's one bad dude and further started freaking out on him the moment he expressed any frustration with the "process." When she relaxed a little at the cocktail party, they had a normal conversation and she told him the truth- she's afraid she sees heartbreak in her future with him. They once again talked about how he was frustrated and she was confused and felt bad on their 1:1. Half the time she hasn't even been genuine with him so of course the poor guy is running around in circles trying to understand why she's a little nuts.

soccermom wrote:It's online too. The article, definitely points to Josh, imo, and talks about the couple taking a trip to mexico recently. Hugesmile LOL

Her ring is the largest in bachelorette history. She said, to the source, that all she did with final 1 in the FS was talk, read, and cuddle. giggle

Right. Suspect But it is how I would expect her to answer. ;)

^^ Now I read the whole thing quite differently! I thought the article was saying that after the proposal, the couple didn't leave the hotel room to use the private beach!  Shows you where my head is at.... 

I took it that way too, eirekey. That they didn't use the private beach/villa AFTER the proposal. They just talked and read. Who knows?   

Alanna wrote:

Piper61 wrote:^^^The one comment I have, relaxing, is that we are shown this "edit" of Josh and Andi not communicating in my opinion more so than with any other.  I don't believe their communication is lacking that much in contrast to the others.  We know that they didn't communicate well during the lie detector conversation and that Andi was really upset by it by all appearances with the earlier preview they showed of her complete meltdown about too good to be true, there are no airy tales, etc.  This same part of that preview, however, was not aired during the episode itself.   At some point during the cocktail party (or even before their talk/fight officially concluded), they seem to have smoothed things over because Josh received the first (maybe it was 2nd) rose but the episode didn't present it that way at all.  More Drama.  They both were all smiles.   As with the other guys and what normally happens, a lot of substantive stuff has hit the cutting room floor for Josh and Andi that does not promote drama about their relationship, their communication beyond insane chemistry, etc.  IMO.

ITA.

Andi started icing Josh out the moment Josh appeared. He had to break through a lot of walls and defenses and preconceived notions before she became herself with him. All of their beginning conversations were Josh trying to figure out what he already did wrong because she was subtly being so icy and guarded with him. It wasn't until their 1:1 when she finally caved to his pressure and told him the truth about the cheating.

Andi was being subtle enough being on guard imo that if he really wanted to be the next Bach or didn't care about her, he could have ignored it, ridden the wave all the way to f3 because of course he was going to be at least f3 no matter what unless he was a total putz, and then became the next Bach no issues. No, instead, he figured out all the random insecurities she had dreamed up to have about him and then proceeded to figure out how to put them to rest because she's the one he wants for real (I think).

When he was frustrated during their lie detector debacle, Andi was pressing him for an ifly because any frustration he may be experiencing automatically equaled that he's leaving and breaking her heart ASAP. I didn't get the sense that Josh even knew that the correct answer was I LOVE YOU to her escalating the fight like that with him.

So from what I've seen, I think when Andi is being normal, their communication is just fine. I don't know how Josh ever could have communicated with someone who decided right off the bat that he's one bad dude and further started freaking out on him the moment he expressed any frustration with the "process." When she relaxed a little at the cocktail party, they had a normal conversation and she told him the truth- she's afraid she sees heartbreak in her future with him. They once again talked about how he was frustrated and she was confused and felt bad on their 1:1. Half the time she hasn't even been genuine with him so of course the poor guy is running around in circles trying to understand why she's a little nuts.

   Alanna, you expressed this even better than I! Thank you!