Re: Clare Crawley - Bachelor 18 Contestant - Spoilers - Discussion

by docnash14 Wed Mar 12, 2014 1:18 pm

[quote="dw_a_mom"]

docnash14 wrote:Interesting to me to read the opposing views of Clare. My concern for/about her is that I did not see her take any responsibility/assume any culpability for any of her actions (including her comment about his parenting). Further, I know this is the psychologist coming out in me but instead of saying repeatedly that JP made her cry (CH was on this same bandwagon about JP "making" the various women cry), I wish she would take responsibility and own her own feelings. Certainly, another person is quite capable of activating a feeling in a person, but what that feeling is and the intensity of that feeling is determined by that person's own internal landscape and history.

I wonder if before she can own her mistakes she needed to find her strength. In telling Juan Paul off, she seems to have taken a huge step for herself. As she gains REAL confidence, if should become easier for her to own faults. [/quote]

Hope so - that will increase in likelihood if she takes the experience of standing up to JP as empowerment rather than claiming her victimization. Unless she sees her role in what occurred, it will likely be the latter. And in general, if we get mired in our victimization, it can easily morph into victimhood which is a state of being.

by dw_a_mom Wed Mar 12, 2014 1:47 pm

I see what you are saying, docnash14. It is a turning point for her, and I hope she uses it wisely.

by notarose Wed Mar 12, 2014 2:15 pm

docnash14 wrote:
dw_a_mom wrote:
docnash14 wrote:Interesting to me to read the opposing views of Clare. My concern for/about her is that I did not see her take any responsibility/assume any culpability for any of her actions (including her comment about his parenting). Further, I know this is the psychologist coming out in me but instead of saying repeatedly that JP made her cry (CH was on this same bandwagon about JP "making" the various women cry), I wish she would take responsibility and own her own feelings. Certainly, another person is quite capable of activating a feeling in a person, but what that feeling is and the intensity of that feeling is determined by that person's own internal landscape and history.

I wonder if before she can own her mistakes she needed to find her strength. In telling Juan Paul off, she seems to have taken a huge step for herself. As she gains REAL confidence, if should become easier for her to own faults. [/quote]

Hope so - that will increase in likelihood if she takes the experience of standing up to JP as empowerment rather than claiming her victimization. Unless she sees her role in what occurred, it will likely be the latter. And in general, if we get mired in our victimization, it can easily morph into victimhood which is a state of being.

Great discussion.
On the issue of empowerment however, "telling off" someone may be a step but is more of an emotional purge than an assertion of self. I do feel that this is reflective of where Clare is at and that it is a step forward for her.
She does have great qualities that hopefully she has recognized by watching the show and that she will further build on. She has drive, confidence to take the initiative and take risks, and so on.

by ElonM Wed Mar 12, 2014 11:57 pm

http://statigr.am/viewer.php#/user/9177801/

Pink Taco with @lucyaragon and @zackkalter

by iamreal2u Fri Mar 14, 2014 1:28 pm

Clare's promotion:

Retweeted by Bachelor Nation
Good Morning America ‏@GMA 4h
ANNOUNCEMENT: @Clare_Crawley is joining us live Monday with all the details on the shocking @BachelorABC finale

by Mommyof2 Fri Mar 14, 2014 1:47 pm

^ I remember during Ben's season, he and Courtney didn't make the media rounds, but they sent Lindzi instead.

by Guest Fri Mar 14, 2014 1:54 pm

I hope she only talks about her own experience and they leave JuanP and Nikki alone. They have chosen to walk away from it all, including perks i'd hope they let them be.

by stuckinsc Fri Mar 14, 2014 2:37 pm

Plus, he did refuse to make any negative comments about Clare on the AFTR. So maybe she will just use this as her final try out for BP4.

by umngirl Fri Mar 14, 2014 2:39 pm

Mommyof1 wrote:^ I remember during Ben's season, he and Courtney didn't make the media rounds, but they sent Lindzi instead.

And Chantal doing some press instead of Brad and Emily.

Interested to hear what Clare has to say.

by Mustang19 Fri Mar 14, 2014 3:18 pm

see2love wrote:I hope she only talks about her own experience and they leave JuanP and Nikki alone. They have chosen to walk away from it all, including perks i'd hope they let them be.

I do too, but that probably won't happen. I would rather hear her take some responsibility for her part (not calling him on anything he may have said immediately, not leaving on her own, willing to accept a proposal) than listen to sour grapes four months after the fact. Take the high road. She got her share of support from the public, and I would rather hear her say she's doing well and has moved on.

by George1218 Fri Mar 14, 2014 3:57 pm

ElonM wrote:http://statigr.am/viewer.php#/user/9177801/

Pink Taco with @lucyaragon and @zackkalter

I can't view it, could someone please post this picture??

by ElonM Fri Mar 14, 2014 3:59 pm

I would love to see Clare on DWTS

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