Re: Chris Siegfried -Bachelorette Contestant - Spoilers - Thread #5

[Baseball Mom]

I am just so glad to see all of the Chris love! 

me too, San

He deserves all the love and support!

[Love_Me]

[Guest]

I think is this correct on paper but in actuality all the "successful" couples coming out of THIS show have had the instant spark and chemistry from the start. Trista/Ryan, Ashley/JP, Jason/Molly and even to some extent Ali/Roberto (who lasted longer than most). Because when you know, you know.  I could point to several couples that progressed "naturally" and still failed..Andy/Tessa, Andrew/Jen, Brad/Em, DeAnna/Jessie, Travis/Sarah, Charlie/Sara.

I think it has more to do with how you transition out of the show into real life and dealing with the spotlight and scrutiny that really determines a couple's longevity. I think it important to stay grounded and get back to normalcy as quickly as possible. That aside, I think the couples running around Hollywood and plastered everywhere are the ones most likely that burn out the fastest once the spotlight dims.

Jason did not choose Molly.  It was later on ATFR, that he realized his mistake.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2EfhEvLf9GM

Jason and Molly are in a long-term soul-mate relationship that takes time to naturally develop.  In fact, it is the exact same type of relationship that Des and Chris have (but with male and female roles reversed).  Wouldn't it be so funny if Des does choose Brooks.  And then later on backtracks like Jason did!  

One interesting characteristic of a long-term soul-mate kind of relationship, is that it is not as obvious when you are in one, as when you separate from your mate for some time.  Then it becomes pretty obvious how much you need/depend on the other person.  It is a very complimentary relationship.  Loosing one's other half can be very disrupting to one's life.  [Maybe Jason got a little taste of that for himself.]

Funny? No. It would hurt Brooks and make Des look like a jerk, much like it made Jason look like a jerk. It was obvious that Jason had a connection with Molly at the end and I was surprised he didn't pick her. So, it could be obvious that Des and Brooks have a connection. And walla, it is!

How do you know Brooks isn't Des' soulmate? He very much could be. That soulmate stuff. Everyone is a soulmate if they work out. It took me a month and a half to know I was going to marry my hub. It can happen very quickly and these relationships that happen very quickly can last forever. I'm sure, after the show is over, we'll all see how Chris and Des never could be.

[MatchMaker]

Funny? No. It would hurt Brooks and make Des look like a jerk, much like it made Jason look like a jerk. It was obvious that Jason had a connection with Molly at the end and I was surprised he didn't pick her. So, it could be obvious that Des and Brooks have a connection. And walla, it is!

How do you know Brooks isn't Des' soulmate? He very much could be. That soulmate stuff. Everyone is a soulmate if they work out. It took me a month and a half to know I was going to marry my hub. It can happen very quickly and these relationships that happen very quickly can last forever. I'm sure, after the show is over, we'll all see how Chris and Des never could be.

I think the whole show is ridiculous/funny. If it wasn't, RS wouldn't have such a huge following.  Not saying folks on the show don't experience real feelings, but they knowingly sign up for the abuse.  It's not like they haven't seen the show before and what happens thereafter.  Or are not aware of what goes on behind the scenes (from RS's blog, this forum, etc.).  By definition, there are going to be at least 24 breakups.  Not sure what those breakups really are though, after a few minutes, here and there, of one-on-one conversations.  Or at most, less one-on-one hours, than there are in a single day or two.  The only real hurt that I can go along with, is that from not "winning" a prize (the fantasy of a relationship).  If one is typically a sore loser, than that loss will be emoted more.  It all has to do with expectations.  And the show sets really high expectations for all participants.  The other kind of "winning" is the public exposure that all participants get, and the opportunity to travel around the world.  So everyone gets something out of the show.  Otherwise it wouldn't exist.

When I use the term "soul-mate", I'm referring to a specific kind of a relationship.  One where both mates compliment each other.  Just because someone gets married or is married, doesn't imply that they have that specific kind of "soul-mate" relationship.  For example, one could marry someone, who at a very basic level perceives/judges and thinks/feels like they do.  But by definition, would not compliment each other, being so much alike one another.  

To set one's expectations so high, as to believe what they have at the end of the show, from just a small number of hours together on this show, is the basis of a deep emotional attachment is ridiculous.  And that they would be so hurt by it,  seems kind of incredible to me.  Reality dating is not real dating.  It's a fantasy.  It's fake.  It's imaginary.  It's a complete joke.  Not saying it can't be an introduction, which leads to something substantial thereafter.  But the show consistently shows us otherwise.

[b]

Not that this comment has any impact on the show, but did anyone else notice the size of Chris and Des' "beverages".    

[Guest]

Funny? No. It would hurt Brooks and make Des look like a jerk, much like it made Jason look like a jerk. It was obvious that Jason had a connection with Molly at the end and I was surprised he didn't pick her. So, it could be obvious that Des and Brooks have a connection. And walla, it is!

How do you know Brooks isn't Des' soulmate? He very much could be. That soulmate stuff. Everyone is a soulmate if they work out. It took me a month and a half to know I was going to marry my hub. It can happen very quickly and these relationships that happen very quickly can last forever. I'm sure, after the show is over, we'll all see how Chris and Des never could be.

I think the whole show is ridiculous/funny. If it wasn't, RS wouldn't have such a huge following.  Not saying folks on the show don't experience real feelings, but they knowingly sign up for the abuse.  It's not like they haven't seen the show before and what happens thereafter.  Or are not aware of what goes on behind the scenes (from RS's blog, this forum, etc.).  By definition, there are going to be at least 24 breakups.  Not sure what those breakups really are though, after a few minutes, here and there, of one-on-one conversations.  Or at most, less one-on-one hours, than there are in a single day or two.  The only real hurt that I can go along with, is that from not "winning" a prize (the fantasy of a relationship).  If one is typically a sore loser, than that loss will be emoted more.  It all has to do with expectations.  And the show sets really high expectations for all participants.  The other kind of "winning" is the public exposure that all participants get, and the opportunity to travel around the world.  So everyone gets something out of the show.  Otherwise it wouldn't exist.

When I use the term "soul-mate", I'm referring to a specific kind of a relationship.  One where both mates compliment each other.  Just because someone gets married or is married, doesn't imply that they have that specific kind of "soul-mate" relationship.  For example, one could marry someone, who at a very basic level perceives/judges and thinks/feels like they do.  But by definition, would not compliment each other, being so much alike one another.  

To set one's expectations so high, as to believe what they have at the end of the show, from just a small number of hours together on this show, is the basis of a deep emotional attachment is ridiculous.  And that they would be so hurt by it,  seems kind of incredible to me.  Reality dating is not real dating.  It's a fantasy.  It's fake.  It's imaginary.  It's a complete joke.  Not saying it can't be an introduction, which leads to something substantial thereafter.  But the show consistently shows us otherwise.

I know what a soulmate is and I think Des and Brooks has that connection . . . very much.

As for Brooks getting hurt, I mean that if Des did that to him later it'd hurt him if he truly had feelings for her, if he truly thought they were a committed couple after the show. That would be a true hurt. Forming a deep emotional attachment can happen on this show as evidenced by those who have succeeded. And the person is engaged to you. It is not ridiculous. It would hurt if Des did what Jason did. It wouldn't be funny, to me.

[Baseball Mom]

I think the whole show is ridiculous/funny. If it wasn't, RS wouldn't have such a huge following.  Not saying folks on the show don't experience real feelings, but they knowingly sign up for the abuse.  It's not like they haven't seen the show before and what happens thereafter.  Or are not aware of what goes on behind the scenes (from RS's blog, this forum, etc.).  By definition, there are going to be at least 24 breakups.  Not sure what those breakups really are though, after a few minutes, here and there, of one-on-one conversations.  Or at most, less one-on-one hours, than there are in a single day or two.  The only real hurt that I can go along with, is that from not "winning" a prize (the fantasy of a relationship).  If one is typically a sore loser, than that loss will be emoted more.  It all has to do with expectations.  And the show sets really high expectations for all participants.  The other kind of "winning" is the public exposure that all participants get, and the opportunity to travel around the world.  So everyone gets something out of the show.  Otherwise it wouldn't exist.

When I use the term "soul-mate", I'm referring to a specific kind of a relationship.  One where both mates compliment each other.  Just because someone gets married or is married, doesn't imply that they have that specific kind of "soul-mate" relationship.  For example, one could marry someone, who at a very basic level perceives/judges and thinks/feels like they do.  But by definition, would not compliment each other, being so much alike one another.  

To set one's expectations so high, as to believe what they have at the end of the show, from just a small number of hours together on this show, is the basis of a deep emotional attachment is ridiculous.  And that they would be so hurt by it,  seems kind of incredible to me.  Reality dating is not real dating.  It's a fantasy.  It's fake.  It's imaginary.  It's a complete joke.  Not saying it can't be an introduction, which leads to something substantial thereafter.  But the show consistently shows us otherwise.

Well said, Matchmaker :clapping!:you've just pointed out the silliness of the entire premise of this show! So now I am just going to sit back, relax and enjoy Chris and his "adorkableness" and not worry whether he connects with Des or not. He can go find his soulmate in the real world once the show is done.

[julychild]

... To me des really doesn't seem all that into any of these guys. It appears she is just going through the motions.

...and despite the permanent smile and constant laughter, she also appears, to me, to be sad.

[Baseball Mom]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/49c18122c4114b5de98bf1e03355616c/tumblr_moytxgtiNS1qh5vbwo5_250.gif

Love_Me, thanks so much for this and the other awesome gifs of Chris!

[MatchMaker]

This is what will happen if Des chooses Brooks, when it comes to real life.  Des after seeing Brooks as someone significant on the show, will find out in real life that she never measures up to Brook's expectations.  Additionally, Des will start to feel overwhelmed by Brooks and will start to pull away.  That will last only so long, and then it will be over.  They do not compliment each other, like Des and Chris would in a long-term soul-mate kind of a relationship.  Not implying Des and Chris are necessarily right for each other, but they do compliment each other.

[Love_Me]

This is what will happen if Des chooses Brooks, when it comes to real life.  Des after seeing Brooks as someone significant on the show, will find out in real life that she never measures up to Brook's expectations.  Additionally, Des will start to feel overwhelmed by Brooks and will start to pull away.  That will last only so long, and then it will be over.  They do not compliment each other, like Des and Chris would in a long-term soul-mate kind of a relationship.  Not implying Des and Chris are necessarily right for each other, but they do compliment each other.

This might not be the best thread to ask this in, but do we know anything about the type of guys Desiree has dated in the past? I know her brother mentioned she likes to date athletes that might have a couple of tattoos.

Maybe, Desiree doesn't necessarily a type? I am just curious.

[sfrank]

This is what will happen if Des chooses Brooks, when it comes to real life.  Des after seeing Brooks as someone significant on the show, will find out in real life that she never measures up to Brook's expectations.  Additionally, Des will start to feel overwhelmed by Brooks and will start to pull away.  That will last only so long, and then it will be over. They do not compliment each other, like Des and Chris would in a long-term soul-mate kind of a relationship.  Not implying Des and Chris are necessarily right for each other, but they do compliment each other.

What I am missing...are you forsoothsayer or psychic? I just trying to figure out how you came up with this?:hidingchair

How do know what Brooks "expectations" are for Des? I'm not saying that they are "meant to be FOR-EVA" but I don't know how any of us can know what either expects of each other. For all you know, it could be the other way around and he doesn't live up to HERS.

I disagree that they don't compliment each other. She has said over and over that Brooks brings out the best in her -- even last night in front of all the guys. My guess would be that Des and has a much better idea of who compliments her than we ever would. Perhaps, I'm watching another show. :greenman:
That aside, I think Chris is awesome but I don't see Des as the girl for him. Sorry. :halo:

BUT, I think Chris will met his "soul-mate" very quickly after the show, as so many other "favorites" have before him.

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