Bachelorette 14 - Becca Kufrin - Episode 9 - July 23rd - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

@Amethyst I always enjoy your episode commentaries!

Would’ve been great if the end scene of Blake having to pee was followed by a Depends ad.  Missed sponsor opportunity ABC.

I’m missing the tough questions and intellectual conversations. Like really where does the depth come in. The only guys this season who sound like they know what they’re talking about IMO were Jason, Wills , clay and Blake a lil. There is IMO not one clip of the rest of the guys seeming smart or interesting lmao I mean Garrett sounds like an 8 year old when he talks and has obviously never blown a kiss before
IMO Becca is working hard to convince herself that she’s in Love with Garrett and Blake never stood a chance
All jmo

nananana wrote:Garrett resembles Tony Romo

Funny you say that cause Shawn said that too iin an IG story.

wishesfireworks wrote:

mercieme wrote:Based on the preview....IMO, the break up with Blake takes place at the FRC.

I heard before that Kaitlyn wanted to break up with Nick beforehand but the producers made her do it at the FRC.
I just feel bad for Blake if it's true, cause seems like homeboy didn't even get any during fantasy suites.

Yes that is correct, she wanted to let him go at f3 but producers made her take him to FRC. I wonder if Becca is going to have Blake start getting down on a knee and then stop him ala Nick.

Aria wrote:I don't think either guy is insincere, but I tend to believe Garrett more when he says that he's in love with Becca. Their relationship seems more mature, more natural, and their connection seems more specific to them, whereas I get the feeling that Blake is in love with the idea of love and would be losing his mind and would be madly in love, no matter who the lead was. IMO.

Obviously both of these guys barely know Becca, but I do think they are both sincere in their own way. The difference however, IMO Garrett is simply gaga for the girl, whereas Blake is in the bubble. Based on his last relationship he falls fast and hard and probably would have done the same no matter the Bette. I think Garrett is in it for Becca and I don't believe that he would be having the same reaction if it had been someone else. JMO

Sprite wrote:

Aria wrote:I don't think either guy is insincere, but I tend to believe Garrett more when he says that he's in love with Becca. Their relationship seems more mature, more natural, and their connection seems more specific to them, whereas I get the feeling that Blake is in love with the idea of love and would be losing his mind and would be madly in love, no matter who the lead was. IMO.

Obviously both of these guys barely know Becca, but I do think they are both sincere in their own way. The difference however, IMO Garrett is simply gaga for the girl, whereas Blake is in the bubble. Based on his last relationship he falls fast and hard and probably would have done the same no matter the Bette. I think Garrett is in it for Becca and I don't believe that he would be having the same reaction if it had been someone else. JMO

I agree. I’m not all fanned about about Garrett but I see their connection and how it’s greater than the others. As a couple, I get them. I was all in with Blake at the very beginning but that has waned. I have a crush on Jason yet can see how different it is with him.

SeekAny wrote:Bottom line I think she’s just been way more into Garrett from the beginning. From her giddiness over his van entrance to his love of the outdoors, to First impression Rose, to comparing him to her Dad, his salt of the earth appeal and that he himself would ben a “hot” Dad. She’s just always really been feeling him. She works at it more with him, telling him he’s sexy driving the tractor or that she had a great view on the raft. I’ve seen very little of that Becca with the other guys. She WANTS Garrett to like her. IMO after his first one on one, it was always going to be Garrett unless something came crashing down. All of this I’m in love with two is total show IMO. She’s most worried about being the jerk who has to hurt Blake. It was always going to be Garrett and lucky for her, I think Garrett fell for her in return. She just had a show to put on in the meantime and struggled with being the decent person she is in the process.

Typically what do we say is the tell of who the F1 is? ... Who is the lead chasing? ... and you have just answered that beautifully.

Bach Thoughts @bach_wisdom
#TheBachelorette pic.twitter.com/DVEwvA3LJT

LeapofFaith wrote:

BGlover wrote:This was a good episode
Jason didn't get any
Blake didn't get any (IMO)
Garrett broke the bed
There was no way she was going to sleep with Blake after that imo

i need to see this!!!! any pics of that??

Kailey Good @KaileyGood
Did they break the headboard? #theBachelorette pic.twitter.com/lIRU389dPV

Nillay wrote:I’m missing the tough questions and intellectual conversations. Like really where does the depth come in. The only guys this season who sound like they know what they’re talking about IMO were Jason, Wills , clay and Blake a lil. There is IMO not one clip of the rest of the guys seeming smart or interesting lmao I mean Garrett sounds like an 8 year old when he talks and has obviously never blown a kiss before
IMO Becca is working hard to convince herself that she’s in Love with Garrett and Blake never stood a chance
All jmo

Garrett may never have thrown a kiss before but he was sure gonna try to throw one to the woman he loves. ; )

Stone_Hedge wrote:

Sprite wrote:

Aria wrote:I don't think either guy is insincere, but I tend to believe Garrett more when he says that he's in love with Becca. Their relationship seems more mature, more natural, and their connection seems more specific to them, whereas I get the feeling that Blake is in love with the idea of love and would be losing his mind and would be madly in love, no matter who the lead was. IMO.

Obviously both of these guys barely know Becca, but I do think they are both sincere in their own way. The difference however, IMO Garrett is simply gaga for the girl, whereas Blake is in the bubble. Based on his last relationship he falls fast and hard and probably would have done the same no matter the Bette. I think Garrett is in it for Becca and I don't believe that he would be having the same reaction if it had been someone else. JMO

I agree. I’m not all fanned about about Garrett but I see their connection and how it’s greater than the others. As a couple, I get them. I was all in with Blake at the very beginning but that has waned. I have a crush on Jason yet can see how different it is with him.

I rarely fan anyone, but then I even more rarely hate anyone. I am the walking definition of Switzerland.

I like all the F3, but like you have been waned a bit on Blake and have grown to like Jason more. I can see her different reactions to each of them and how that reaction has changed as the show progressed.

I like Becca. I liked her last season and I still like her...a rare feat. She is not perfect, but she seems down to earth and kind. I could actually be friends with Becca!

Show Garrett...for the purpose of my own personal enjoyment of the show and until I see him in action after the AFTR, I am ignoring the SM stuff...he seems to wear his heart on his sleeve and probably more than any other time on this show, I see a contestant totally head over heals for the lead. And I say this as someone who has seen plenty of connections on this show....some that I thought were just for show and others that I thought were sincerely genuine with a really good possibility of succeeding. IMO this guy seems totally sincere in his emotions towards Becca...to the point that I actually feel for him and that rarely happens I can assure you. Switzerland remember! If not for this emotion that I see from him, he would not be a contestant that I would be particularly interested in, but because of it, I am now genuinely interested in seeing how this couple works in the real world. I admit it ... the more I see of them together, the more I am liking them.    I know, I'm shocked too!

This is one of the few proposals I am looking forward to seeing. I think it may rival my all time favourite for sincerity and emotion...Des and Chris. Let's see if it works out as well.

OK. A lot to digest after this episode. I now understand better the order of the dates shown as opposed to their real order. It makes sense with the storyline they are going for.
So, Blake, whose date was shot last, after she let Jason go and had the FS with Garrett, is difficult to watch because of knowing what we know, and how he is the one who waited for the longest time ( 2 weeks! ) and to top it off she brings him on a date where they cannot make physical contact with each other.. I mean that’s torture from the producers, and Becca if she had any influence on this...and Blake is so happy to be with her anyway, despite the restrictions put upon him, it’s endearing and yet sad to see him still hoping. She dodges the hard questions he asks her by saying ‘ I know’ or ‘ I get it, when I was in that position last year.”..and then kisses him instead of offering an honest answerto his legitimate concerns.
The evening part was looking also forced, she looked like she knew she was going to break his heart but still wanted to play along and get the privacy if the FS. Wow, I do not feel like they had a ‘ honeymoon’ time in there... she was all made up in the morning...which means they may have woken up before to ‘ get ready for hair and make up ‘before shooting the scene, Blake looked more sad than happy, like he knew but didn’t want to fully acknowledge that she was not completely with him. So even though she said a few nice words to reply to him, she was NOT sounding like the way you wake up with a lover after a nice private night with or even without sex. No tenderness or sweetness or longing. I can see her using the ‘filming schedule’ to jump out of bed, get in the shower, do the hair/ make up thing and get back in bed with him, all dolled up only to leave him...to say the foreshadowing: ‘maybe it’s the last time I see her like this.’

Then, we see Jason who is looking great and happy to see her. She is NOT straddling him oh oh.! Bad omen! So they go around town and visit all kinds of sites from food vendors to temples and traditional dancing. They seem to share a good connection and BANG ! Jason starts mentioning something about the future and she has an awkward ‘ weird’ almost anxiety attack at the thought of it. Girl, it’s the Final week, did you think it would be easy to let Jason go ? I truly think she misjudged her feelings for Jason, he grew on her as he was so patient, mature, kind, fun, sexy and his true qualities started to make her question why she did not feel IT with him? She thought it would be easier to distance herself from him, but Jason fulfilled some areas that no one else seem to have, a true friend first and partner material. She was so fixated on Garrett and to a lesser degree that she did not let herself go or open up as much with Jason. It’s fine, she is not ready to see or accept the love that is offered to her in that way, outside her fantasy of Garrett being her missing piece of puzzle. I thought he was so genuine and vulnerable with her, yet the true gentleman to the end. It forced her to be real and actually feel the pain of losing him, even as a friend if not her mate.
What resonated with me was the way he shared his true feelings and when she could not reciprocate, he still was ‘ rooting for her happiness’ ! Now, this is a silly,very scripted reality show, but ladies and gentleman, that is LOVE. He genuinely was wanting her to be happy to the point of being heartbroken by her and still wishing her well. I will come back to this point later. She was the most genuine and raw that we’ve seen her in a while in saying goodbye to him. And it kept being referred to the day after.
Which was Garrett’s turn to be with her. Big smile on each of their faces, Monkey jump and everything you expect from these two lovebirds. Loved to see the scene with the river and the elephants. Of course not much conversation, except they are so happy to be there, together. They are smitten and Gaga and that makes them both look dumb or lost in lala land. This is the time to find out about partner and marriage material and again, in the evening conversation where Garrett looked tortured to tell her he loved her, and shared his fears, about the possible engagement and commitment, but she brushes away any of his fears again by relating to what happened to her last year and the lack of honesty etc...she kisses him and basically gives him the approval that he is seeking and probably has been looking for
In his past relationships but did not get. He keeps telling her and us how he feelsaround her and how she makes HIM feel and how he can be himself and say what’s on his mind ...and she ALWAYS approves or give him love in return. Yes, he wants to always be with her, she gives him a sense of being ok, which sadly I think he did not get even from his family.
So here we go with what I think I finally figured out: they are indeed ‘ in love ‘ with someone who is fulfilling their unmet expectations , for her the daddy issues still unresolved and for him, the lack of approval and understanding so they are co-dependently needing each other to stay that way, loyal to a fault and just feeding into their unmet needs. So that the stuff that is usually worked out in therapy BEFORE you enter a serious relationship. But I do not see them having the clarity or the maturity to see that their fantasy is just that a fantasy based on an imagined persona that fits their expectations. He needs to be loved by her. She needs him to continue seeing her as someone who can be loved and be there for her no matter what, like her father should have if he had lived longer. Their entanglement is based not in loving who they really are, which they don’t even really know yet, but the image they need to project to heal their past hurt and unfulfilled relationships.
That’s where I see Jason as the one who really loves Becca, he wants HER to be happy, it’s selfless, that’s what love is, not about ‘ she makes me feel good’ I want more of this feeling good. Real mature love is a real genuine liking and appreciation of the other and wanting to GIVE them love. By brushing important issues under the carpet and always agreeing and approving whatever Garrett is saying, Becca is setting herself for big disappointments if and when she is suddenly not in perfect agreement with her Man. But life is also dealing with conflict and differences, even in love. I do not see them able to last long when those come up in the real world. After the Disney dust settles and decisions are made, character traits are exposed and their real self ( other then the laughing, giggling dumb ones ) appear, it will be interesting to watch.
Now I look forward t the MTA and see what transpires.