Bachelorette 14 - Becca Kufrin - Episode 4 - June 18th - *Sleuthing Spoilers*

Haven’t you heard of those situations where two people get engaged because they’ve been together for a while, and it feels like the next step... then as the engagement rolls on they maybe start to wake up that the situation isn’t right for them anymore, but now plans are in motion, the wedding is rolling, invites are out, showers happened. It’s just a steam train you are too embarrassed/scared to stop? Then... after the wedding... when the dust has settled, a divorce happens rather quickly? Happened to a friend of mine... they had a 1 year marriage. Maybe this is a situation like that.

I don’t think it is relevant what happened in Gs marriage/divorce that is for Becca to work out. (However imo a major red flag) What I don’t like is that G signed up to participate in a realty tv not his ex or her family. G has now on National tv labelled her an emotional abuser and indicated that she is the sole reason their marriages failed. IMO Again labelling someone who does not have a voice to respond. It must been extremely embarrassing for her and her family as friends, colleagues,employers, neighbours etc must be forming opinions. Gossip has a way of spreading and forming wings imo. IMO it is inexcusable that Any contestant (male or female) can label ex partners abusive on national tv when the ptr can not defend themselves. IMO it is slanderous. I realise tptb encourage this information but In this case G is a 29yr old and should imo have had the sense to word details of the separation differently. It’s not as if the contestants don’t know that these questions will be asked. His indifference to Others feelings is another red flag to add to the pile imo.

It’s all just weird. If you have just got out of a quickie marriage.

You dont sign up to potentially get engaged to someone you barely know. Apparently some people never learn their lesson. IMO

IMO he is shady and has evil eyes and thats all i need to know. I dont know him and I dont care to know him. (Next season please).

He is Becca’s problem, not mine.

sosleepy wrote:Haven’t you heard of those situations where two people get engaged because they’ve been together for a while, and it feels like the next step... then as the engagement rolls on they maybe start to wake up that the situation isn’t right for them anymore, but now plans are in motion, the wedding is rolling, invites are out, showers happened. It’s just a steam train you are too embarrassed/scared to stop? Then... after the wedding... when the dust has settled, a divorce happens rather quickly? Happened to a friend of mine... they had a 1 year marriage. Maybe this is a situation like that.

it could be this situation for sure...and that I could understand, and if Garrett explained it as such but he didn't.

Rather he said it was because of emotional abuse. which I completely sympathize with if true, however that is a heavy accusation to throw around, on a national tv show, where his ex doesn't have an opportunity to debunk what he is saying, without going to the media, where it could get very messy.

IMO

Astrobach wrote:To be clear, I did not say he was abusive, but read many comments that did questions that and bring that up as a possibility. There are many red flags that can be observed however, and I am just weighing all the elements at our disposal. All IMOAA

“speculations that he may have been abusive because of the way the marriage ended,

But he was the one ending the marriage from all accounts so how does that suggest that he was abusive? Doesn't make sense to me. I would think that if he was the abuser than wouldn't she be the one ending it? JMO

Lots of speculation going on here which I personally find to be uncomfortable and far reaching based on a lot of edited and biased info.

Sprite wrote:**snipped**
Lots of speculation going on here which I personally find to be uncomfortable and far reaching based on a lot of edited and biased info.

Yes, this exactly for me.  But then in general, I feel this way about a lot of the conversations this season and one reason I haven't / don't post much except for SCs.  

Bring on BIP and the drama!   I can't believe I'm actually looking forward to BIP and its drama to get away from the yuckiness of this seasons cast and boring-ness (IMO) of the season as a whole.  I do still like Becca and wish her well though!

JMO

Ladybug82 wrote:

Sprite wrote:**snipped**
Lots of speculation going on here which I personally find to be uncomfortable and far reaching based on a lot of edited and biased info.

Yes, this exactly for me.  But then in general, I feel this way about a lot of the conversations this season and one reason I haven't / don't post much except for SCs.  

Bring on BIP and the drama!   I can't believe I'm actually looking forward to BIP and its drama to get away from the yuckiness of this seasons cast and boring-ness (IMO) of the season as a whole.  I do still like Becca and wish her well though!

JMO

Yeah, me too. IMO, lots of speculations based on very little fact. It’s fun to speculate but sometimes it gets too personal and I wonder if that’s necessary? But to each his/her own, I choose to stay quiet most of the time.

Jmo.

As far as being uncomfortable in speculating, IMO it's only going to get worse as we have seen the type of people they cast which leads to speculation. If one feels uncomfortable by all means they do not need to participate in the conversation and at the same time there are those who are entitled to post their opinions within the rules. I enjoy reading different takes and thoughts for example, I never thought about him being the guy who leaves two months after getting married, was in a relationship for a total of 3yrs? gets on a show where you're expected to find love, and propose in a very short time frame, less than 40 hours of knowing the lead. He is declaring he can certainly see Becca in his life 4 epis in. I find that a good exchange of opinions.

If Garrett didn't act like a crybaby, inflicting guilt to make Becca feel sorry for him, because that's the way I saw it, throwing in the word bloodline, which made me cringe, I wouldn't be having this discussion.

For me is just a thing of compassion, in the case that Garrett truly believes thet inmigrant children should be thrown against walls and be punched (which I believe he does) and also has suffer real abuse himself (which I believe he did), like I said for me it's just a thing of compassion because I come from a family of inmigrants myself and people from my family have suffered abuse not by their partners but by people in position of power that basically think the same as him. Now how I'm supposed to feel compassion for a person that doesn't feel compassion for my people, I understand why people will defend Garret and I feel empathy for them because they may have suffered the same, but I will also hope that people understand why I wont feel sorry Garret If he really thinks that way.JMO

I also think they're that don't really care about this whole situation I will continue to not care

sosleepy wrote:Haven’t you heard of those situations where two people get engaged because they’ve been together for a while, and it feels like the next step... then as the engagement rolls on they maybe start to wake up that the situation isn’t right for them anymore, but now plans are in motion, the wedding is rolling, invites are out, showers happened. It’s just a steam train you are too embarrassed/scared to stop? Then... after the wedding... when the dust has settled, a divorce happens rather quickly? Happened to a friend of mine... they had a 1 year marriage. Maybe this is a situation like that.

yep this happened with 2 of my cousins as well.. dated their guy SO's for years, got married and divorced less then a year later almost 2. Things happened that made them realize they were better off apart amongst other problems. Sad but maybe Garrett and Kayla thought the same thing idk. I find it suspicious how they divorced 2 years ago? yet she's already re-married!

sbolduc wrote:

sosleepy wrote:Haven’t you heard of those situations where two people get engaged because they’ve been together for a while, and it feels like the next step... then as the engagement rolls on they maybe start to wake up that the situation isn’t right for them anymore, but now plans are in motion, the wedding is rolling, invites are out, showers happened. It’s just a steam train you are too embarrassed/scared to stop? Then... after the wedding... when the dust has settled, a divorce happens rather quickly? Happened to a friend of mine... they had a 1 year marriage. Maybe this is a situation like that.

it could be this situation for sure...and that I could understand, and if Garrett explained it as such but he didn't.

Rather he said it was because of emotional abuse. which I completely sympathize with if true, however that is a heavy accusation to throw around, on a national tv show, where his ex doesn't have an opportunity to debunk what he is saying, without going to the media, where it could get very messy.

IMO

I just think TPTB feel they need to exaggerate at the cost of peoples dignity and this case they will find the a negative and turn it into RATINGS....ZZzzzzz.....if they thought finding good stories in people would make their show boring (if it was only positive stories)....then they certainly look for ones that will cater the fans who need entertaining and something to react on....

LiboLRC wrote:For me is just a thing of compassion, in the case that Garrett truly believes thet inmigrant children should be thrown against walls and be punched (which I believe he does) and also has suffer real abuse himself (which I believe he did), like I said for me it's just a thing of compassion because I come from a family of inmigrants myself and people from my family have suffered abuse not by their partners but by people in position of power that basically think the same as him. Now how I'm supposed to feel compassion for a person that doesn't feel compassion for my people, I understand why people will defend Garret and I feel empathy for them because they may have suffered the same, but I will also hope that people understand why I wont feel sorry Garret If he really thinks that way.JMO

I also think they're that don't really care about this whole situation I will continue to not care

Oof, to be fair, that kind of violence was never implied by any of the images he liked, let's not get too carried away here. It's a bit far fetched to believe he's that kind of a monster.