Bachelorette 14 - Becca Kufrin - Media SM - Discussion - *Sleuthing Spoilers* #6

@northernviewer Her dad is mini-Poodle and her mom is half Maltese and half Yorky. She does keep us a good busy!

This is a case where he can’t win.  Some are happy he addressed it, some don’t buy it at all and some like me are on the fence.  I am happy he took ownership but time (lots of it - long after show is over) will tell what is true.

I am not going to assume how deep these beliefs are to him.  Only he knows that.  But his actions in the house will be telling.  A true racist can’t hide their feelings for long.  

All imo

@Tiggerlgh Good post and IA.  

IMO, the fact that lots of guys from the season are posting in support of him is a good sign to me. It tells me that he either completely hid his feelings/beliefs (and IMO that would probably be hard to do in that environment. I would think cracks would show at some point and producers use it to their advantage) or those beliefs never surfaced enough to cause tension in the house, which makes me wonder about just how much he believes in them and how deeply rooted in him they really are.

As previously mentioned and like anything else from this show... time will tell.  

JMO

I've always said that I don't think he's an open and proud bigot, so I never expected him to have issues with anyone. That said, everyone in the house was an "acceptable" person to him, as no one was gay, transgender, "feminine", overweight, or an illegal immigrant. I think he just has this idea of what men should be like, mixed in some ideas about what Americans and patriotism should be like, and he's the type to kind of roll his eyes when he sees a boy wearing a dress or football players kneeling, but he's not going to call them names. I think that type of discrimination/bigotry is much more common in this country and in some ways, it's more dangerous because it's harder to condemn than straight out name-calling and, yet, it still creates an environment where people are made to feel "other".

And, like I've said, I honestly don't think we'll ever really know if he's changed because I don't think he ever was the guy to call people names or anything overt like that. He was never a Roseanne. I think only the people closest to him will really know, because of microaggressions and such, IMO.

Kashathediva wrote: @northernviewer Yes, that’s Bailey she is a 4 month Morkipoo. Part angel and part monkey.

I just asked you in another thread too. Gosh darn what a baby  my husband of negative 6 weeks is begging for a furry friend and I’m crackinggggg....

As for G, I’m gonna be really unpopular with this but since imo, he wasn’t that deeply thoughtful what he was doing, these thoughts arent something that’s fully ingrained in him imo. So I don’t see it as a roadblock for them really. I think there are more people around us that find this stuff funny/“harmless” and don’t have real animosity towards others, likely because they’re products of their environments. Of course I’m not saying it’s good or right and they shouldn’t be called out, it doesn’t make them all irredeemable wife beaters/psychos/etc. imo.

@Aria very well stated. IA
@alanna congrats & mazel on upcoming. Savor it.

He also said something about those likes not being a reflection of his beliefs and morals...but explain to me why he thought, a post implying all those grieving school kids were actors, was funny or somewhat believable enough to be like worthy

Imo he is not openly racist, transphobic etc etc because his rep as a “loving, genuine, lighthearted, open minded and non- judgmental guy” would be heavily questioned.
So instead of being vocal about these topics, he goes over to just “mindlessly tapping “ these obviously racist and transphobic posts.
Sigh....i just don’t know anymore

All jmo

I don't think any of the posts were necessarily racist, though?

Tiggerlgh wrote:This is a case where he can’t win.  Some are happy he addressed it, some don’t buy it at all and some like me are on the fence.  I am happy he took ownership but time (lots of it - long after show is over) will tell what is true.

I am not going to assume how deep these beliefs are to him.  Only he knows that.  But his actions in the house will be telling.  A true racist can’t hide their feelings for long.  

All imo

'Winning' really shouldn't be his focus at all. It probably is because this apology, whether sincere or not, is about damage control and winning people over, at least enough that we shut up about it so Becca & Garrett's love story and honeymoon phase can proceed as planned. I just don't think it's a case of mindlessly double tapping as he claimed. Mindless double taps imo are for posts that just shows up in your explore tab because maybe someone you follow liked it. This is an account he made the decision to follow, these are posts he was consistently liking, imo those are his beliefs. As for the guys defending him, well none of them are really part of the minority groups affected by Garrett's beliefs so it could've gone undetected in the house, & he's probably not the only guy there who thinks that way, also I don't care. All jmo.

ReneeM wrote:

Tiggerlgh wrote:This is a case where he can’t win.  Some are happy he addressed it, some don’t buy it at all and some like me are on the fence.  I am happy he took ownership but time (lots of it - long after show is over) will tell what is true.

I am not going to assume how deep these beliefs are to him.  Only he knows that.  But his actions in the house will be telling.  A true racist can’t hide their feelings for long.  

All imo

'Winning' really shouldn't be his focus at all. It probably is because this apology, whether sincere or not, is about damage control and winning people over, at least enough that we shut up about it so Becca & Garrett's love story and honeymoon phase can proceed as planned. I just don't think it's a case of mindlessly double tapping as he claimed. Mindless double taps imo are for posts that just shows up in your explore tab because maybe someone you follow liked it. This is an account he made the decision to follow, these are posts he was consistently liking, imo those are his beliefs. As for the guys defending him, well none of them are really part of the minority groups affected by Garrett's beliefs so it could've gone undetected in the house, & he's probably not the only guy there who thinks that way, also I don't care. All jmo.

It’s the wide range of social issues covered in a disparaging way, that he has admitted to liking on SM, that I think paints him into a corner. Everyone has a bias or two for whatever reason or differing opinion however his like history is a montage of a specific mindset that, from what is known of Becca, is seemingly polar opposite to her. It’s not really about 2 people with different political allegiance; it’s about how they view the society they occupy.
I don’t think this type of mindset will necessarily reveal itself on the show because everyone is aware they are on tv and some people are more conscious of image/public perception in that environment than others.

It really wouldn’t matter much what Garrett believes if he weren’t rumored to be the F1 of an openly feminist liberal-minded lead. The show process doesn’t afford enough time or opportunity to know a lot of things so I fully empathize with Becca having to figure out if this is a deal breaker or negotiable in the context of prospective fture husband/co-parent.

Kashathediva wrote:@northernviewer Her dad is mini-Poodle and her mom is half Maltese and half Yorky. She does keep us a good busy!

She is so beautiful, @Kashathediva.

@LoveDovez aww thank you.