Bachelor 22 - Arie Luyendyk Jr - SM Media - *Sleuthing Spoilers* - #3

BKay wrote:My gut says that Arie's best connection was to young Bekkah, but his head was afraid she wouldn't commit, so he cut her loose. Really, for some men, a 14 year difference is a good idea cause they are so darned immature. (There is a marriage in my family of exactly that age difference and they are going strong after 15 years - she was 18 and he was 32 when they married - she was mature and he was a late bloomer.) Arie seems very immature...

I could almost agree with this ... but then I think that in the "real world" the one to get bored with the relationship would be Bekah and not Arie ... and not because of her lack of commitment.

IAH I think Lauren B. just might be that right girl for him NOW without having to change or compromise (and that all-round connection that we haven't seen much of) ... in conversational style, maturity, priority/evaluation and not to forget sexuality ... whip, whip, hurray!

When Arie meets the right girl ... he’ll marry her. Him not wanting to stay with the girl he chose at the FRC does translate to he’s not ready to marry in my books. He broke up with her after maybe a few months of dating.... no big deal. That’s not like ending a real life engagement.... that’s comparing apples and oranges IMO

I have a question. Was this cast of girls chosen for Peter or Arie? If Arie, he prefers early to mid 20 girls with a sprinkling of 30 year olds? Or are these just the ones that made the cut and happened to be in that age category?

I also think that because he and Lauren are just dating and not engaged the pressure is off of Arie so he can be freer to express his emotions of love - for today anyway.  He can live in the moment.  When it is just dating it is easy to find something wrong with her to justify contacting an ex or ending it.  Arie has got to be Arie.  

I understand where Lauren is.  She is a 25 year old love struck girl and in IMO caught up in the grand romantic gesture of him coming back after he dumped her for another girl realizing his mistake.  However, the girl has the internet and surely has read everything about  him and chosen to sweep it under the rug and take her chances.  I don't feel bad for her but I do wish her luck.  I actually hope it does work out because that would be incredible turn of events.  

I had read somewhere (I cannot remember where so no source - sorry but I know I read it) that Arie told friends he wanted to be like George Clooney and hold off on marriage as long as he could.  The thing is he is no George Clooney.  If he waits until he is mid 40s pushing 50 to get married he will not have the young nubile gorgeous and innocent 25 year olds at his beck and call.  Maybe a too elderly pushing 35 year old will do but what kind of beautiful accomplished mature 35 year old would be interested in someone like that?  So the irony is by waiting he will have to settle.

@Stone_Hedge the girls were chosen independently of who was going to be the bachelor, but maybe the final cut was done knowing the traits of the lead and what dynamics could be created among the group (fragile, handle with care) - IMO

@northernviewer ... I think a person has to be ready prior to meeting the right person, to even recognize the importance and take a chance ... I doubt Arie is THAT ready ... I think He thinks he is and is selling his truth ... I'm just not seeing IT. I stated few weeks ago "he is adorable" ... and he is ... until he isn't. The line in this case is not subtle but quite clear ... it requires consciousness/mindfulness and wit ... he lacked in one, if not both.

Thank you @happygolucky. It seems he wants someone within the age group of Emily when he felt he fell in love. He’s advanced five years from that but gravitates to that age group even with his ex Sydney. Interesting imo.

BKay wrote:My gut says that Arie's best connection was to young Bekkah, but his head was afraid she wouldn't commit, so he cut her loose. Really, for some men, a 14 year difference is a good idea cause they are so darned immature. (There is a marriage in my family of exactly that age difference and they are going strong after 15 years - she was 18 and he was 32 when they married - she was mature and he was a late bloomer.) Arie seems very immature...

IMO, There is no way an exciting, beautiful smart young woman like Bekah should squander her youth on Arie. She can do much better with an educated, fun, youthful, ambitious and handsome man. IMO, she would be stupid to settle for Arie and I do not think for a minute that she would. Win the race and get engaged on this show, for sport? Absolutely. Spend even the rest of the year yoked to him? - Dream on....Arie. He knows it. This is not his first rodeo and he eliminates her because he knows she will destroy him and that's why he's afraid of her. Every player can be played by a smarter, younger, beautiful, more confident and powerful and self-possessed woman. That's Bekah. She told him she doesn't need him. They both know it. JMO

happygolucky wrote:@Stone_Hedge the girls were chosen independently of who was going to be the bachelor, but maybe the final cut was done knowing the traits of the lead and what dynamics could be created among the group (fragile, handle with care) - IMO

@northernviewer ... I think a person has to be ready prior to meeting the right person, to even recognize the importance and take a chance ... I doubt Arie is THAT ready ... I think He thinks he is and is selling his truth ... I'm just not seeing IT. I stated few weeks ago "he is adorable" ... and he is ... until he isn't. The line in this case is not subtle but quite clear ... it requires consciousness/mindfulness and wit ... he lacked in one, if not both.

Just because a person is ready to marry doesn’t mean they’re going to marry the next person who comes along. This is The Bachelor ... not some Hallmark movie

I'm guessing Arie isn't getting married anytime soon. The guy was in a year long relationship with a girl who was a senior in college when they first slept together and he repeatedly lied and cheated on her in their 1-year relationship. That ended two months before the show filmed. And that's been his pattern since before Emily's season. The single mom he lived with and dated for two years and was going to have a baby with talked about how immature and terrible he was. He's never thought about getting married until he was offered this show. Which is ridiculous because a reality tv show doesn't make magically someone change their values and lifestyle. I'm sure Arie will get married eventually. And he'll cheat on her and lie to her until she turns the 3-0 and then he'll dump her for real. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. The guy has never had a serious, healthy, committed relationship his entire life. And Lauren or the other 20-something blondes he dates after her aren't going to change that. IMO.

I don't believe right now that Arie wants just one. There are men that will never want just one. I don't know if Arie is included in that group but for now I don't think he is ready to commit himself to one person. JMO.

Oh man @Aria, cold hard truth bringer I guess  I want to believe in everyone’s capacity for change and growth, but yeah, Arie has a track record and this is just all par for the course.

Aria wrote:I'm guessing Arie isn't getting married anytime soon. The guy was in a year long relationship with a girl who was a senior in college when they first slept together and he repeatedly lied and cheated on her in their 1-year relationship. That ended two months before the show filmed. And that's been his pattern since before Emily's season. The single mom he lived with and dated for two years and was going to have a baby with talked about how immature and terrible he was. He's never thought about getting married until he was offered this show. Which is ridiculous because a reality tv show doesn't make magically someone change their values and lifestyle. I'm sure Arie will get married eventually. And he'll cheat on her and lie to her until she turns the 3-0 and then he'll dump her for real. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. The guy has never had a serious, healthy, committed relationship his entire life. And Lauren or the other 20-something blondes he dates after her aren't going to change that. IMO.