Nick Viall & Vanessa Grimaldi - Bachelor 21 - Discussion - #3

singanewsong wrote:I think that Nick never made it seem like there was a wedding coming anytime soon - or at all.  And his reaction to the end of his engagement to Vanessa is all about his still believing in himself and going to Chicago to hang out with friends.
He was way more distraught over his non-engagement to Andi.  I mean 3 days after the break up he's attending some promo event and posing for photos.
So it could have ended up a mutual decision to end the engagement but I believe it was a result of Nick's behavior

Regarding the bolded, I hate to say it, but it does appear that way. Maybe he's just handling it different. I wonder if N&V are still talking at all? jmo

Vanessa seemed to really love Nick, but I'm beginning to wonder if Nick ever really loved Vanessa.  He seemed really down during his whole season. I just wonder if he really had a connection with V or if he thought he just had to choose someone and propose. I don't think there was anyone on his season that would have been a good match for Nick except maybe Vanessa. Maybe after the show was over and all was said and done, he realized that they weren't a match after all.  I don't know, just trying to figure out what happened.  All jmo.

Well by his own statement he still loves her very much

Not only by his statement, by his actions the last 7 months or so. I never saw him smile so much when he was with Vanessa.

He is basically saying that now he still loves her so much since he knows he messed up again considering this was his fourth time being on this franchise. I do think I feel sorry for Vanessa . I do think that woman really gave up everything for him. Anyway , Vanessa is gorgeous  woman and she can find that somewhere else. Jmo.

Billysmom wrote:Well by his own statement he still loves her very much

I'm not saying he didn't love her. I'm sure words of love were expressed between them. I'm just wondering if he actually advanced from the infatuation stage to a real love stage. jmo

Stacia620 wrote:I don't know why Vanessa would be jealous of Ashley or Sharleen. They are strictly just friends. Vanessa was apparently keeping in touch with a male friend (or an ex) by liking his Instagram pics. Maybe Nick was jealous?

What I don't understand is why did Vanessa apply to be on the US Bachelor when she knew she did not want to permanently move from Canada? She could have applied for Bachelor Canada. And I think she applied before she knew Nick was the Bachelor, so I don't think she went on specifically for Nick. cmiiw

So many unanswered questions.  

All JMO

I didn't watch Nick's season, but I was curious about what went wrong so I tried to view everything I could find on YT.  ^THIS was the big question I asked myself.  Vanessa said a friend submitted her application for the show, but I'm sure her friend knows show attached Vanessa is to Montreal and her family so I'm confused as to why her friend did this AND why Vanessa agreed to participate.  I thought both she and Nick were pretty clear that neither of them were really keen on giving up their country.  Nick even asked what deal breakers Vanessa had and she said "Sunday dinners with her family."  His reply was something along the lines of being very worried because he had a past relationship that revolved around family gatherings/events and said it stressed the relationship.  So I felt that they had two major, major issues (country of residence and family involvement) that they didn't agree on from the get-go.  Yikes.  I also remember when Nick's dad told Vanessa that sacrifice and compromise were crucial for a successful relationship, and Vanessa started to cry.  I of course have no idea what she was feeling, but I suspected that she already knew that neither she nor Nick were going to be capable of either in the long run.  

I also believe love, like beauty, must be in the eye of the beholder because I sensed more strife than spark in their relationship.  At first I thought it was just due to the dreaded editing that so many of the couples have to deal with.  But their ATFR was so awkward that it made me cringe...they didn't show any of that euphoria that most couple have upon finally being able to be together.  And the post-show interviews that I was able to see were just as bad since they tended to focus on their challenges rather then their joys.  But I do feel sorry for their heartbroken fans.  I've been there, done that, and I'm sure I'll do it again.

I do think they loved each other and it was a mutual decision to split. They knew their challenges from the get go and did their best to overcome them but couldn't IMO. It's the reality of many relationships which fall apart IMO. I don't compare Nick's behavior now to either Andi or Kaitlyn's breakup coz the show format didn't allow for real closure for him unlike his engagement to Vanessa. There are no 'What If's' now coz N&V both gave this a shot and it didn't work out. Even though it's hard, I do think they both found closure which wouldn't have been the case if he hadn't picked her due to their different personalities/desire to live in different countries/etc.

IMO Every relationship whether good or bad teaches us something about ourselves. I think this relationship will help both of them to understand the difference between what they want and what they need.

#TeamNick #TeamVanessa

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