Dr. Bryan Abasolo - Bachelorette 13 - Discussion - #4

Seabear wrote:IMO it is very obvious that Bryan is genuine and a truly nice person. He is effusive and charismatic and is very open hearted with his feelings. It does not ever strike me as anything false....conversely I love his enthusiasm and affection toward Rachel. The instant attraction between the two of them and all the soft subtle very emotionally revealing moments that they have shared on their journey toward love has been a pleasure to watch. What really gives me optimism for Rachel and Bryan is that I believe everything Rachel has said post filming and her happiness exudes from her. All of that is exactly the Rachel I see with Bryan. When Rachel and Bryan do their press tour finally both will be able to speak freely, they are both mature, intelligent, well spoken people and their happiness will set the narrative.  I believe the majority of people will embrace them because the joyful bond they clearly share will quell most of the doubters. Those that still display rudeness or ire or SM hate are not worthy of them wasting any negative energy on. I see good things in the future for Rachel and Bryan and I am excited to see them freed from the restraints of secrecy!!
JMO

I love BBF because it is a respectful place that values opinions and sleuthing but not rudeness or bad behavior.

@seabear  I see the same things that you see. I see a romance between Rachel and Bryan built on a mutuality that is not present with any of the others.

I must be the odd-man-out because I don't think of Bryan as "too smooth" or "cheesy". I like his personality, find him genuine and very likable. Matt (from the little we saw of him) appears mature and level-headed. I respect his opinion of Bryan as a regular and good guy.

As for the XOXO gossip girl conversations shown between Dean and PeDUR, I saw more jealousy and insecurity from Dean which I believe is a reflection of his young age. I found it odd that Dean said about Bryan that he is "a 37 year old guy from Miami" (as if it were a negative) who "has spent the last 15 years wooing women". First of all, insert "26 year old" and "from LA" for Dean, and does that sound any better? You could even add in "male modeling experience" for Dean. How is that more genuine-sounding? And how the heck would Dean know anything about how Bryan has been wooing women for 15 years? Yes, he's probably has been dating for 15 years, because he is 37 years old, after all. Whereas, "Deanie Babies" would have had to have started dating at 11 to say that same thing. All I have to say is, conversational skills such as: "Do you believe in the tooth fairy?" and "What is your favorite dinosaur?" may have something to do with why Bryan is her preferred choice.  Pppfftt. Go home, Dean, it's time for a diaper change. IMO.

@MiaHawk Well said.

I thought Sharleen did a really good job of articulating my thoughts on the matter (source:alltheprettypandas)

Urgh, I'm sorry, I really, really like Dean but you guys know I'm going to come to Bryan's defense here. Even if you think Bryan is too smooth or disingenuous, I have a problem with him being judged for being single in his late 30s, living in Miami. OF COURSE I am biased on this topic as my husband-to-be was a single man (albeit with one engagement and several long term girlfriends under his belt) in New York City until we met when he was 42. And I can get on board with the fact that maybe Bryan's age and status could be suspect in a smaller town (or even a good-sized city) where the traditional norm is to marry your college sweetheart and start a family by 30. (Hell, most of my high school friends in Ottawa, not a small town by any means, went this route.) But the truth is that a single man in his late 30s in a city like Miami is not an anomaly, nor does it make him a professional "sweet-talker" with malicious intent. Sure, he's probably good with women and has game, but in that case, good for him. That doesn't automatically mean he's not sincere with them. And for this to be coming from a 26-year old, who in all likelihood is less ready and likely to settle down, he just isn't one to judge.

I don't think I've ever seen a contestant stereotyped based on age, ethnicity, and city of origin as much as Bryan has been. Especially when the evidence doesn't really seem to support it, considering he was in a 4-year-relationship and no one has gone to RS and tabloids about the sordid past of the spoiled winner. IMO.

IMO Bryan has been harshly judged because of the Peter deification.  It really is as simple as that IMO. Also IMO totally unwarranted.
Bryan is the one man who is the most genuine in his intentions and pure X factor connection to Rachel. IMO. The connection was obvious Day 1.
JMO

Seabear wrote:IMO Bryan has been harshly judged because of the Peter deification.  It really is as simple as that IMO. Also IMO totally unwarranted.
Bryan is the one man who is the most genuine in his intentions and pure X factor connection to Rachel. IMO. The connection was obvious Day 1.
JMO

I disagree. People find it hard to believe he is this in love out of the limo and is just a smooth talker, that is what I see peeps on sm saying, nothing to do with Peter. I don't have that viewpoint fully myself though.

I do think that people would have disliked Bryan anyways (many podcasters and recappers I listen to hate Bryan, while also disliking Peter), but I do think that Peter being his competition made it much worse. I don't think it was the whole "being love right out of the limo", because that's been true for so many fan faves, like Shawn and Whitney and Vanessa. I think his whole vibe just reminds people of the classic Miami player. It's unfair, but I think that's where it comes from. IMO.

Aria wrote:I do think that people would have disliked Bryan anyways (many podcasters and recappers I listen to hate Bryan, while also disliking Peter), but I do think that Peter being his competition made it much worse. I don't think it was the whole "being love right out of the limo", because that's been true for so many fan faves, like Shawn and Whitney and Vanessa. I think his whole vibe just reminds people of the classic Miami player. It's unfair, but I think that's where it comes from. IMO.

This is true too. I think it's that player vibe/Miami thing going on as well. People just don't believe him. I guess we'll see. Rachel isn't faking it right now imo so whatever is going on bts is going right for her. Perhaps they really do have this insane attachment and connection and we'll all see it post show like she promised we would.

Agree to disagree!!    I will add the edit as done Bryan no favors by cutting out all the (obvious IMO but I see through the edit) substantive conversations and RL discussions that have occurred between Bryan and Rachel. The edit has chosen to make Bryan very one dimensional...the physical/kissing guy and IMO he is a multi dimensional man who has lots to offer and an ideal match for Rachel.

I also think Rachel is a very smart woman and she knows the real Bryan and she clearly loves him IMO. So I trust that he is the man I see.
JMO

I already see the insane attachment and connection they have together on the show. To me, it is very obvious, especially during their 2nd date.

Seabear wrote:Agree to disagree!!    I will add the edit as done Bryan no favors by cutting out all the (obvious IMO but I see through the edit) substantive conversations and RL discussions that have occurred between Bryan and Rachel. The edit has chosen to make Bryan very one dimensional...the physical/kissing guy and IMO he is a multi dimensional man who has lots to offer and an ideal match for Rachel.
JMO

I am looking forward to you being right and the rest of sm (including me) being wrong. Love is fun to follow

Aria wrote:

I don't think I've ever seen a contestant stereotyped based on age, ethnicity, and city of origin as much as Bryan has been. Especially when the evidence doesn't really seem to support it, considering he was in a 4-year-relationship and no one has gone to RS and tabloids about the sordid past of the spoiled winner. IMO.

'

IMO? Umm, yes. All of this. So much this. And sadly, it's been a reminder that good people, who would never consider themselves racist, ageist, elitist, people who stereotype, and all else.. don't grasp just how deep systemic and/or inherent racism, ageism, stereotypes, and prejudice really are embedded and entrenched in how they form their perceptions and then what leaves their mouths/keyboards. Because... Oh, dear. I don't think 98% of peeps even realize it when they do it, so I'm not throwing shade AT ALL. But, it is a thing this season. That's a sensitive topic, though, so I'll stop there.

I love that she very seriously glows when she even hears Bryan's name. She's doing a terrible job, imo, of concealing who her F1 is. She's radiating happiness and it makes me so happy for her.

Aria wrote:I thought Sharleen did a really good job of articulating my thoughts on the matter (source: www.alltheprettypandas.com)

Urgh, I'm sorry, I really, really like Dean but you guys know I'm going to come to Bryan's defense here. Even if you think Bryan is too smooth or disingenuous, I have a problem with him being judged for being single in his late 30s, living in Miami. OF COURSE I am biased on this topic as my husband-to-be was a single man (albeit with one engagement and several long term girlfriends under his belt) in New York City until we met when he was 42. And I can get on board with the fact that maybe Bryan's age and status could be suspect in a smaller town (or even a good-sized city) where the traditional norm is to marry your college sweetheart and start a family by 30. (Hell, most of my high school friends in Ottawa, not a small town by any means, went this route.) But the truth is that a single man in his late 30s in a city like Miami is not an anomaly, nor does it make him a professional "sweet-talker" with malicious intent. Sure, he's probably good with women and has game, but in that case, good for him. That doesn't automatically mean he's not sincere with them. And for this to be coming from a 26-year old, who in all likelihood is less ready and likely to settle down, he just isn't one to judge.

Sharleen hitting the nail on the head as usual   JMO

@MiaHawk you're definitely not an odd-man-out. Bryan was genuine and 100% there for Rachel from night one, IMO. Of that I have no doubt