Lauren Bushnell - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #6

hannah.e. wrote:This is an unpopular opinion..but all the things on HEA that showed Ben wasn't ready for the wedding were part of the script. Like IMO, calling off the wedding was part of the script. The wedding registry, them going to look at two totally different homes, etc were leading to that. When in ~reality I don't think it was really like that.

That makes sense. My question from what I've been reading about HEA while it was airing, is perhaps that was exactly the script, ok'd by Ben. I found it hard to believe that he dropped the bombshell of no wedding during filming of HEA if he hadn't given it a lot of thought, therefore knew beforehand what he wanted the content of HEA to contain. JMHO

GuardianAngel wrote:

hannah.e. wrote:This is an unpopular opinion..but all the things on HEA that showed Ben wasn't ready for the wedding were part of the script. Like IMO, calling off the wedding was part of the script. The wedding registry, them going to look at two totally different homes, etc were leading to that. When in ~reality I don't think it was really like that.

That makes sense. My question from what I've been reading about HEA while it was airing, is perhaps that was exactly the script, ok'd by Ben. I found it hard to believe that he dropped the bombshell of no wedding during filming of HEA if he hadn't given it a lot of thought, therefore knew beforehand what he wanted the content of HEA to contain. JMHO

Their reality show was based around two people, not just one. Sure, Lauren wasn't as open to doing the show, but going with my theory on this, I don't think we have any evidence that indicates she was in the dark about everything.

I absolutely do not buy into the theory that Lauren signed onto and ok'd any script that had her fiancé canceling a wedding on her, runaway groom. Nor do I believe this is the OG storyline the show was going for. Nope. That devestation and shock was real. IMO.

If the cancelled wedding wasn't part of the script then it never would have been put back on imo. If they were having legitimate issues at that point, then it wasn't necessary to have the show end in "happily ever after" imo. It's weird to me that basically every other scenario from the show was written off as fake and scripted by the majority except for this one scene, which seems to always be conveniently left out that it was resolved (back on).

They had to end the show on a positive note, and that's what they did.

The other scenes are scripted, because you could tell they were. The scenario Ben cancelled the wedding in (fake therapy with Twin1&2 and Grace) was absolutely contrived and scripted, but you could tell the emotions were not.

The show was billed as basically wedding planning and leading to a wedding. Chris Harrison offering the televised deal at the beginning of the show tee's that up. Ben confirmed in a radio interview with Ryan Secreat that there was absolutely supposed to be a televised wedding airing in February. I think Ben backed out on the wedding midway through filming. The show's script had to switch gears, and the vague wedding back on scene was how they tied it up with a happy ending.


No way did they want the happy golden couple to have such a dark show about failed relationships and cancelled weddings like it turned into. Just no.

Unless Lauren says calling off the wedding was real and she was hurt by that...I'm saying in a normal interview, not what was said on HEA, then I'll believe it was real. Mike Fleiss and co aren't going to have some lovey new reality show without drama IMO.

hannah.e. wrote:Unless Lauren says calling off the wedding was real and she was hurt by that...I'm saying in a normal interview, not what was said on HEA, then I'll believe it was real. Mike Fleiss and co aren't going to have some lovey new reality show without drama IMO.

You don't think Lauren was hurt by the called off wedding? Really?

I'm agreeing with @sosleepy again. They signed on to do the show for the wedding, Lauren was full on board all the way through, Ben backed out at some point, and sprung it on Lauren and the producers.

It's interesting to read these explanations for Ben's mess ups, it was the producers of the Bach, the producers of HEA, Lauren, the producers of this podcast, AshleyI etc etc. It's never Ben, he's just a naive down to earth guy, who just wants his simple life in Denver. Never his fault. Even his own words are someone else's fault Jmo.

I know I keep saying this, but honestly, would she have been better off being married to Ben now? It sounds like the calling off the wedding was the big bad, but that there was lots of not meshing and unhappiness beforehand. JMO, these are two people who should never have been together past a fun fling. Planning a wedding if you still are not over your guy saying two ILYs is not a smart idea.

I am glad for her she isn't stuck in a bad marriage. All JMO.

The people article insinuated that they signed up for the show so ben could pursue politics imo which was exactly what ben originally said the show would showcase when it was first announced. Lauren said in the interview neither really wanted to do another reality show but it was a good opportunity for Ben's political aspirations. They were both duped by the show imo. It was supposed to be some part time filming thing that mutually benefited both of their professional careers. Instead they were forced to spend several weeks all day filming a show that made a farce of them as people and their relationship and didn't allow them to have the time they needed to be a couple imo. I don't blame either over the other for that because in the end they both agreed to it. IMO both of them were fully aware of the storyline that was laid out for them and chose to move forward with it. 

Also people are entitled to have positive opinions of ben.

Lauren looks so beautiful now in days. Not that she wasn't before, but she really glows now. The dead weight is gone.

stuckinsc wrote:I know I keep saying this, but honestly, would she have been better off being married to Ben now? It sounds like the calling off the wedding was the big bad, but that there was lots of not meshing and unhappiness beforehand.  JMO, these are two people who should never have been together past a fun fling.  Planning a wedding if you still are not over your guy saying two ILYs is not a smart idea.

I am glad for her she isn't stuck in a bad marriage. All JMO.

Oh gosh! Don't get me wrong. Totally 100% agree with you on this one, and I think they would too!

Just the way Ben went about the entire situation was just so poorly executed and heartless. I do not fault him for backing out, that was obviously the right decision. But he way he went about it? No beuno. Very hurtful and heartless, all around.

No one will ever convince me that Lauren was expecting Ben to cancel the wedding during the on camera "group therapy" session on HEA. The utter confusion and tearful expression on Lauren's crestfallen face was as real as real can get. IMO no doubt that in that moment she was blindsided and devastated. I am certain watching it play out on TV for all the viewers to see only made a terrible situation worse. IMO that was truly the straw that broke the camels back on their relationship. And the cause of that trauma was ALL Ben's FAULT.

IMO Lauren truly loved Ben and Ben thought he loved Lauren. However with Ben's own inability to accept his own failings or even true feelings IMO Lauren and Ben were doomed to fail from the moment of the engagement. I agree with Lauren that Ben should have told Lauren about the double ILY's before he proposed so Lauren could have made her own informed decision on whether she wanted to say yes or no to accepting the ring. I am certain when Ben told Lauren all that had happened the next day....that the happy engagement took a turn for the worse. Then when Lauren had to relive it very publicly for a second time during the airing of the show, no doubt this was damaging to the already fragile engagement. Once again this is Ben's fault for not being honest and forthcoming to Lauren and only being concerned by his own process and feelings. Also Ben's fault for being incapable of accepting the fault of his double ILY verbal diarrhea and lack of empathy to understanding Lauren's upset.  

I agree it is better to break off an engagement that exit a bad marriage. It is how the engagement and canceling of the wedding was handled that I find fault with. This is all on Ben IMO.

Hopefully both Ben and Lauren learned valuable lessons about themselves and what they want in their future partner. Sometimes the most difficult situations and painful episodes in our lives teach us the most. I am certain both Lauren and Ben will eventually find their true HEA.
All JMO