Ben Higgins - Lauren Bushnell - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #8

^ dancing while the lyrics 'single ladies, I can't hear ya' is playing in the background coincidence or not, still weird to me.

Lauren is probably still under contract if the 2 yr rule applies. If that's the case, she isn't free to take her ring off and call it quits. If and when the time comes it will be up to TPTB to make that decision as far as an announcement.

Andi and Josh were on the red carpet for CS season, being interviewed by CH talking wedding plans. A couple of days later, the announcement was made. At the time she had to be there as the reigning couple. So much for that.

They seem incompatible for this phase of life at least. Long term..I saw a lot of potential, just like I saw watching their season of the bachelor. When the time came for the wedding, kids...I think they'd both be all in. Supportive, committed to each other and their family.. not feeling the need to leave. Sadly it doesn't seem they'll make it that far.

Who knows what's going on behind closed doors?
Maybe something will be clarified soon with the big reveal or 2 yr contract being over.

Whether Ben and Lauren are together I don't know but considering multiple things this year and now Lauren partying with DJs without her fiance it definitely gives me pause. 

I know each relationship is different but I have to admit this one just doesn't seem healthy to me.

I will be the first to admit I was a huge fan of these two. I love when a man  is googly eyes in love with a woman and I saw that with Ben and Lauren. He was the Bachelor but he was taken with her the minute he saw her.

It was post show that I began to lose my respect for Ben in the relationship. He was all I'd marry that girl tomorrow because he thought that's what he should be saying. He's too worried about himself and his image to realize that his actions and words have consequences. I never thought he took responsibility for the two I love you debacale, he thought it was his right to do so and didn't care how badly it affected Lauren and even Jojo. Don't get me wrong, Ben's a good guy with good intentions but he's got a lot of growing to do and soul searching. The man needs to find himself and know what he's looking for before he goes in search of it. It was clear he had pause to marry Lauren and I think that destroyed her. She wasn't good enough in her mind and they never recovered from his pause. It's probably for the best, if he had hesitation then good for him for pulling the plug on a wedding but don't string her along anymore.

Lauren's life will go on, she's got a great family (my favorite from this franchise) and friends and support system. Go back to Cali, and wait to find the guy that really suits you, who's not so needy and lost.

I've always believed they are both good people with good intentions, I hope they find their happiness in whatever form that takes.

Cocoasneeze wrote:

hannah.e. wrote:Here's a scenario.. If Ben were the one who jetted off to vegas and was getting drunk, dancing next to models, would people be saying yeah good for Ben..or would they be like this guys a f***boy?

Imo Actually they would. He gets away with everything. Him pushing Lauren to do HEA, and then pulling out of the wedding on that very show got most fans to hate on Lauren more.

Most of us here are thinking, that they've broken up, but Lauren still has to tip toe around Ben's feelings, just to not disrespect him. Jmo

Where did you read that he pushed her to do HEA? Everything I've read says it was a mutual decision. Ben turned down DWTS for her, so IMO I doubt he forced her into HEA.

Also, IMO pulling out/putting off the wedding probably didn't affect Lauren that much considering she said this about why she did The Bachelor... "It was somewhat of a joke at first. Dating in LA was not going that well. I went into the casting office without making a video package thinking if anything it would be a good interview experience. Once cast, I obviously wanted to meet Ben but still didn’t think too much of it. I think I agreed to go on the show thinking it would help me broaden my horizons and force me to put myself out there a little more, which I was not great at doing." Source: http://sarahscoop.com/the-scoop-on-lauren-bushnell/

IMO, she wasn't ready for marriage then and still isn't now. Maybe Ben figured that out and that's why he became hesitant. I don't blame him.

sweeti810 wrote:

Cocoasneeze wrote:

hannah.e. wrote:Here's a scenario.. If Ben were the one who jetted off to vegas and was getting drunk, dancing next to models, would people be saying yeah good for Ben..or would they be like this guys a f***boy?

Imo Actually they would. He gets away with everything. Him pushing Lauren to do HEA, and then pulling out of the wedding on that very show got most fans to hate on Lauren more.

Most of us here are thinking, that they've broken up, but Lauren still has to tip toe around Ben's feelings, just to not disrespect him. Jmo

Where did you read that he pushed her to do HEA? Everything I've read says it was a mutual decision. Ben turned down DWTS for her, so IMO I doubt he forced her into HEA.

Also, IMO pulling out/putting off the wedding probably didn't affect Lauren that much considering she said this about why she did The Bachelor... "It was somewhat of a joke at first. Dating in LA was not going that well. I went into the casting office without making a video package thinking if anything it would be a good interview experience. Once cast, I obviously wanted to meet Ben but still didn’t think too much of it. I think I agreed to go on the show thinking it would help me broaden my horizons and force me to put myself out there a little more, which I was not great at doing." Source: http://sarahscoop.com/the-scoop-on-lauren-bushnell/

IMO, she wasn't ready for marriage then and still isn't now. Maybe Ben figured that out and that's why he became hesitant. I don't blame him.

Thanks for this. I completely agree. I also have a hard time believing everything that came out of HEA. So scripted and made up IMO. Lauren may have said she was ready to marry him, but I don't actually think she was. You need longer than a year IMO before marriage. Lauren wanted a dog, Ben said they (ahem, her) travel too much. It's unfair to a pet if they're not around. Did it seem like Lauren made an effort this year to change her schedule so she could take care of a dog? Nah. Ben pulling out of the wedding was the mature thing to do IMO.

IMO a few months ago when Lauren started travelling by herself and posting it all on IG maybe she was hoping Ben would see what he was missing and go out of his way to win her back. That didn't happen IMO. He went back to work and normal life, she partied on. What she did probably turned him off her more. Best wishes for them both.

Sheokaf wrote:IMO a few months ago when Lauren started travelling by herself and posting it all on IG maybe she was hoping Ben would see what he was missing and go out of his way to win her back. That didn't happen IMO. He went back to work and normal life, she partied on. What she did probably turned him off her more. Best wishes for them both.

I also agree with this. I feel like that's how it went down. I don't think partying completely turns Ben off..but seeing it posted all over SM and the reaction from others probably made it seem worse than it was, and he was like who is this girl? He's said before that Lauren can't even finish a glass of wine.....that's the version of her he sees. When she's away..that's clearly different.

can't finish a glass of wine?? Perhaps she meant a case when she told Benji this fantastical tale about herself? See, I don't care who drinks or does what or doesn't do what, but just own who you are, girl!! Warts and all. What an annoying nimwit imo.

"We ain't perfect but we tryin"