Vanessa Grimaldi - Bachelor 21 - *Sleuthing Spoilers* #4

MVMom39forever wrote:1. Nick reported to be on DWTS
2. RS, Afterbuzz and Bach nation saying they broke up or that they can't see lasting.

1. the boy loves to dance and love doesn't exclude people who appear on DWTS ... and IMO DWTS doesn't stand as a proof that Nick is fame-****ing d*bag who wants to stay in LA, shill and just have fun. Actually, DWTS is not all fun, there's lot of sweat and pain involved, but ultimately can be a triumph of overcoming personal limits.
2. Nobody of those people actually know Nick's intentions, they can only assume, just like me ... so when they prefer to look at it negatively, I choose the opposite. Also I haven't seen/heard much depth ... BN world isn't exactly the place I search for the eloquent, wise and humble people ... but it doesn't exclude them either, so I'm happy I've found few in the cast through the seasons I actually like to watch ... or read about.

If the opportunity arose for my s.o. to make some good money over the span of a couple of months, I would be the first to say go for it.
Life is challenging and expensive. Make the most of it while you can.

I wouldn't turn DWTS down and the money especially for Vanessa why? At this point both Nick and Vanessa know where their relationship stands

Kashathediva wrote:If the opportunity arose for my s.o. to make some good money over the span of a couple of months, I would be the first to say go for it.
Life is challenging and expensive. Make the most of it while you can.

He's trying to get his own business up and running. It's a no brainer, IMO.

MVMom39forever wrote:Happy...I don't think anyone, even unspoiled, questions that he picks Vanessa in the end. That is pretty obvious and the fact that they are not going to show f1 vs. F2 fantasy dates on episode before WTA will just further drive home the point.

The show, imo, for past couple episodes seems all about can Vanessa and Nick last. Well, that is generally a time will tell answer....wait and see couple in real world. But in past week, a couple thing has happened:

1. Nick reported to be on DWTS
2. RS, Afterbuzz and Bach nation saying they broke up or that they can't see lasting.

Yes, RS says that EVERY season but I personally can't recall Danny Hoyt of Afterbuzz ever making these predictions 3 weeks before finale. It just has never been done.

Many of you will say, "oh Danny doesn't know." My response is someone is feeding Danny ( and others in Bach nation) the break up rumors and telling him to leak it.

Why? What's in it for ABC? Viewer support for Nick on DWTS, and as Seabear suggests...Bachelorette Canada for Vanessa. Everyone wins with Rachel getting her lead role. Heck, even Raven and Corinne win with spots on BIP.

And, that is pretty much what Danny predicted last Monday on podcast....all five of them continuing in spotlight.

I don't think Vanessa will go for Bachelorette Canada...her feelings are too deep to get over it right now...she's not going to quit without even trying...she will try her best to make it work...I can vividly remember her saying the way she feels for Nick are so different from her other relationships... those feelings stand out and will make the difference...Nick, on the other hand, will also do the same...they are too happy for me to believe that something wrong is going on in their relationships...

I have a tendency to like something after I see some positives statements not completely reading the whole context, thus I have doubts in liking this post since it aligns with Nissa being broken up... of which I don't believe so...but, I have already liked it anyways... Lol!!

sosleepy wrote:Wait. Why do people think they split? Has RS actually said they split? 

I think they are def still together.

I don't know if Nick and Vanessa are together or not and I've always said every couple from this show is a complete crapshoot on whether or not they last. That said, I've been reading everything and I feel there's a lot of Chicken Little'ing happening here. Btw, correct me if I'm wrong but regarding RS, he hasn't said Nick and Vanessa are already broken up. Far as I know, all he's said right from the start was that he wasn't hearing good things but he's also always maintained that Nick picked her and they're still engaged. Again, correct me if I'm wrong if that has changed in recent weeks/days.

So that said, I feel like many have looked at the edit, which hasn't been great for the past few episodes (and to be fair, it's only been two episodes really because before her second 1 on 1, Vanessa was more invisible than anything else in my opinion) and clearly meant to convince viewers that Nick does not pick Vanessa, coupled with RS's general negativity that he's had from Day 1 about Nick, then social media and online chatter latching onto those rumors about Vanessa and the tide turning on her rather viciously, then the Bachelor Nation recap shows jumping on the edit with the idea that Nick has no connection with any of the women so he'll pick Vanessa but it won't last, etc. etc. And basically all this "noise" has created such a pall and cloud over the season IMO that some have internalized that negativity and translated it to Nick and Vanessa are over.

However, IMO, I don't agree that there has been anything on Nick and Vanessa's end that is making it seem like they are clearly broken up already. I don't think Vanessa's pulling back on liking things on social media about the show necessarily means things with her and Nick are over. And instead maybe it's because in the last two/three weeks, online chatter have decided that she's a whiny, entitled, fake bitch who was the real villain and bitch in the house and the producers hid it. And many of course felt the need to go to her accounts and tell her as much. And then there are all the comments about her and Nick being over already because again, online gossip is taking on a life of its own. So honestly, I don't blame Vanessa if she has pulled back and put on her blinders to all that negativity online.

Regarding spending time together, as some have noted using JoJo and Jordan, there is no guarantee that some, no matter how observant, will always pick up exactly when the couple was spending time together. We may not know how many times Nick and Vanessa have actually been together since filming ended. Didn't many feel like his responses in some interview a week ago heavily suggested he did spend Valentine's with her?

Another thing, for all of this "noise" happening online, I've seen nothing in the tabloids suggesting or even hinting at a breakup or any drama heading into the finale - even from a tabloid like Life & Style. Hell Life & Style is just reporting that the F2 woman apparently hated the cold and the location and felt led on by Nick when she was eliminated (so basically like every F2). And again, compare this to the thrashing Jordan got and by extension his and JoJo's relationship. There's been very little chatter beyond online boards like these. And again that chatter seems to me based on nothing more than the turn the edit has taken with the relationship, as well as the turn in opinions about Vanessa. IMO I see nothing from Nick and Vanessa's end that gives anything away regarding the current status of their relationship - good or bad.

So again, yeah they may be completely done already but I personally just don't believe that we've seen any major indication of this and instead it just feels like a negativity has come over the season and the couple and that is being transferred to them and their relationship post-show, when the truth is I don't feel like people really know what is going on with them except for them, their family and their loved ones. And some of the reactions also play to the varying perceptions some have regarding what's been seen on the show.

Like I keep seeing all this stuff about Vanessa being in teacher mode and lecturing Nick and that's supposedly a red flag for their relationship and save for their confrontation about Corinne, I'm haven't seen that (and even the Corinne situation, I didn't see lecture/Mommy mode and more pissed off girlfriend mode). Again, Vanessa was fairly invisible after that, we got half a second of her being emotional with him for the volleyball date, then they had their second 1 on 1 where I saw them maturely discuss his meltdown, how she felt about it, what his feelings really were and then later she looked disappointed and crushed by his response to her I Love You. Then the HTD was basically her family being skeptical and grilling them both about the realities of their relationship. I haven't seen this Mother/Teacher lecturing mode so many keep attributing to Vanessa but I've noticed it's become a go-to, right along with they don't have a friendship, like he does with Rachel for points against their working out.

Sorry for making this long, it's just I've been reading so many comments and had a lot of thoughts. But basically for me, I like Vanessa and I like Nick. If things don't work out for them, life goes on, no sweat off my back. However, I just feel like there's been a shift against them that's been less about them and their actions and people's own perceptions, IMO.

sosleepy wrote:Wait. Why do people think they split? Has RS actually said they split? 

I think they are def still together.

Last week, RS said they are still together. But he has been consistent with they will not last.

For me it is not a question of if Nick is likely to move to Canada or Vanessa to LA. It is not about if Nick is on DWTS or Vanessa finishes out her school year. It is not about the shilling or the fame. And it certainly doesn't matter one iota what RS or Buzzfeed has to say one way or the other.

For me it is a question of sincerity. Do Nick and Vanessa actually love each other sincerely? If so, nothing else will matter enough. Love is a choice. A decision you make daily. One that requires sacrifice and teamwork.  It is not just a feeling that you have. It is a conscious choice to put another person above yourself.

The real question to me is, do Nick and Vanessa have what it takes to put their love above all the other things in life right now? To me it doesn't mean they have to be in the same town or unencumbered by DWTS. I think it means that in the midst of living real life, they are able to place their love above everything else.

I see it working out well because I believe that both Nick and Vanessa are sincere in wanting to work towards a life of love with each other.

Catdwoman50 wrote:

sosleepy wrote:Wait. Why do people think they split? Has RS actually said they split? 

I think they are def still together.

Last week, RS said they are still together.  But he has been consistent with they will not last.

Which is essentially what he's said about damn near every couple that's come out of this franchise - well since he started blogging about it anyway.

The thing about RS and his predictions about whether a couple stays together... it's the same problem he has with spoiling the next lead. It's fluid, and in real time, and things change, events change. He can't tell the future. 

Not to mention I have no doubt his sources come to him with their own biases, that automatically color his point of view. The guy is such a total azz kisser. Listen to his podcast with whichever guest he has on. Whatever they say he "yes ma'ams" them and sucks up big time. For example, he has that chick on who hates Nick (forget her name), and she speaks the gospel. Next he has Dana on who discredits guest #1, and all the sudden Dana speaks the truth. It's all silly and ridiculous.

OnePromise wrote:For me it is not a question of if Nick is likely to move to Canada or Vanessa to LA. It is not about if Nick is on DWTS or Vanessa finishes out her school year. It is not about the shilling or the fame. And it certainly doesn't matter one iota what RS or Buzzfeed has to say one way or the other.

For me it is a question of sincerity. Do Nick and Vanessa actually love each other sincerely? If so, nothing else will matter enough. Love is a choice. A decision you make daily. One that requires sacrifice and teamwork.  It is not just a feeling that you have. It is a conscious choice to put another person above yourself.

The real question to me is, do Nick and Vanessa have what it takes to put their love above all the other things in life right now? To me it doesn't mean they have to be in the same town or unencumbered by DWTS. I think it means that in the midst of living real life, they are able to place their love above everything else.

I see it working out well because I believe that both Nick and Vanessa are sincere in wanting to work towards a life of love with each other.

thank you for voicing my POV much better.

3 months in, I can't predict the future of my relationship let alone someone else's.   

Could they be having problems? Sure. Which couple doesn't. It's whether you can resolve those problems and make it work is the real test of relationships IMO. Having said that, I would support both of them whether they stick together or split in the future. They should do what's best for them irrespective of the show or public perception. They don't owe the fans anything IMO. It's just a show for me but it's real life for them.

Now, let me figure out when half of Bach Nation became relationship experts. Maybe all of them can help bring down the divorce rate in the world with their amazing insights.  

All JMO.