Ben Higgins - Lauren Bushnell - Bachelor 20 - Discussion - #2

To be honest, I don't get why telling someone to eat more because they are thin is bullying. This could already tear her down? And how this is about Ben not picking JoJo? She does look unhealthily thin in that photo.

Obviously, being a Lauren B h@ter myself don't read through the comments, but from what I have seen here, and little I saw over Ben's IG post, the comments toward Lauren were mild, but, mean posts were the back and forth name calling between fans and trolls, which are not quite about Lauren B.

peggy0221 wrote:To be honest, I don't get why telling someone to eat more because they are thin is bullying. This could already tear her down? And how this is about Ben not picking JoJo? She does look unhealthily thin in that photo.

Obviously, being a Lauren B h@ter myself  don't read through the comments, but from what I have seen here, and little I saw over Ben's IG post, the comments toward Lauren were mild, but, mean posts were the back and forth name calling between fans and trolls, which are not quite about Lauren B.

Because anorexia and bulimia (Lauren was accused of having both) are very serious mental health disorders, not to be diagnosed by a$$hats glancing at a picture. And if they are truly concerned for her health and well being (ha! Yeah right), calling her out like that is quite probably the least helpful thing they could do for anyone in that situation.

Skinny shaming is hurtful and cruel. To me, it's no different than ragging on someone for being obese. Lauren's mother and sister have her same slender build. This is (very likely) who she is, based on her genetic makeup. It's cruel to rag on her and imply otherwise. Hateful.

They're jealous. I hate that reasoning, but considering I'm super jealous of that build, I feel like I can make a qualified judgement on it  

sosleepy wrote:

peggy0221 wrote:To be honest, I don't get why telling someone to eat more because they are thin is bullying. This could already tear her down? And how this is about Ben not picking JoJo? She does look unhealthily thin in that photo.

Obviously, being a Lauren B h@ter myself  don't read through the comments, but from what I have seen here, and little I saw over Ben's IG post, the comments toward Lauren were mild, but, mean posts were the back and forth name calling between fans and trolls, which are not quite about Lauren B.

Because anorexia and bulimia (Lauren was accused of having both) are very serious mental health disorders, not to be diagnosed by a$$hats glancing at a picture. And if they are truly concerned for her health and well being (ha! Yeah right), calling her out like that is quite probably the least helpful thing they could do for anyone in that situation.

Skinny shaming is hurtful and cruel. To me, it's no different than ragging on someone for being obese. Lauren's mother and sister have her same slender build. This is (very likely) who she is, based on her genetic makeup. It's cruel to rag on her and imply otherwise. Hateful.

I don't know, I mean it still feels very mild to me.
I would rather people say I'm overly skinny than overweight at anytime.

It's the license of anonymity. People believe they can make comments that would normally be considered rude when said to someone's face, can now be said behind the protection of a username.

Since I don't know any of these people personally I am not going to make any judgement on a persons mental health. Being called names or being shamed publicly or privately is abuse.  IMO the abuser is always at fault and the abused person is the victim.  
Nobody I know personally enjoys being torn down and criticized repeatedly....  Unfortunately the internet allows these abusers to hide behind a computer... I sincerely hope the SM sites change the rules and out this negative posters and then delete and ban their accounts via IP addresses.
One can hope....  JMO

Nonina430 wrote:

There were many contestants that were/are bullied. They did not

go to pieces. There is some instability here. Wrong as it is. My

31 year old GD was a victim of bullying. I shed many tears over

her pain. When she appeared in her first film gorgeous and talented

at age of 20 I saw in her such a strength. For some it works that way.

Glad it worked out for your GD but so many have killed themselves over this senseless bullying.  I am a big believer if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all.

Look, I definitely don't have Lauren's problem, I'd die to have her build. I'm still fighting off excess baby weight from 1.5 years ago when I had my twins!!! But I have a really good friend who has a thyroid condition. Because of that condition (a hidden disability, really), she is incredibly, incredibly skinny. She's been accused of being anorexic her entire life, and that couldn't be further from the truth. It's caused her a lot of anguish and tears in her lifetime. In some ways, being super skinny might be harder for hatred. People feel like they have "free reign" to say whatever, because skinny is the "desired body type" for our society. I have always had to struggle to maintain a healthy weight, it's just how I'm built. When I happen to be in need of hitting the gym and a little "fluffy," rarely/never do people make comments, because fat shaming is more taboo.

Bottom line, I don't think it's cool to be hurtful towards a person's weight, body shape, color or crede. Period. End of discussion. Women hating on women and using body image to do so is just one of the more perplexing and sad aspects of our society.

Alrighty, off my soapbox.

Telling someone to eat more is about as tactful as telling an overweight person to get on a diet. I hear it hurts just as much, though I haven't been blessed tested with this particular problem. Wah.

sosleepy wrote:Look, I definitely don't have Lauren's problem, I'd die to have her build. I'm still fighting off excess baby weight from 1.5 years ago when I had my twins!!! But I have a really good friend who has a thyroid condition. Because of that condition (a hidden disability, really), she is incredibly, incredibly skinny. She's been accused of being anorexic her entire life, and that couldn't be further from the truth. It's caused her a lot of anguish and tears in her lifetime. In some ways, being super skinny might be harder for hatred. People feel like they have "free reign" to say whatever, because skinny is the "desired body type" for our society. I have always had to struggle to maintain a healthy weight, it's just how I'm built. When I happen to be in need of hitting the gym and a little "fluffy," rarely/never do people make comments, because fat shaming is more taboo.

Bottom line, I don't think it's cool to be hurtful towards a person's weight, body shape, color or crede. Period. End of discussion. Women hating on women and using body image to do so is just one of the more perplexing and sad aspects of our society.

Alrighty, off my soapbox.

Sosleepy, I agree with you. I will never understand how people can hide behind a key board and say ugly and hateful things about someone they don't even know. Everyone that has met Lauren has said she is beautiful and so sweet. There are some cast members from this show that I do not like but I never go to their SM or forum to say ugly things about them.

nannymargie wrote:

Nonina430 wrote:

There were many contestants that were/are bullied. They did not

go to pieces. There is some instability here. Wrong as it is. My

31 year old GD was a victim of bullying. I shed many tears over

her pain. When she appeared in her first film gorgeous and talented

at age of 20 I saw in her such a strength. For some it works that way.

Glad it worked out for your GD but so many have killed themselves over this senseless bullying.  I am a big believer if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all.not

not from this nonsense show, that I'm aware of. Let me clarify it was my Grand Daughter not
my daughter. She would have handled it much differently. Coming from type A Mother and Father.

Seabear wrote:Since I don't know any of these people personally I am not going to make any judgement on a persons mental health. Being called names or being shamed publicly or privately is abuse.  IMO the abuser is always at fault and the abused person is the victim.  
Nobody I know personally enjoys being torn down and criticized repeatedly....  Unfortunately the internet allows these abusers to hide behind a computer... I sincerely hope the SM sites change the rules and out this negative posters and then delete and ban their accounts via IP addresses.
One can hope....  JMO

Technology moves at a pretty fast pace. It's not as easy to identify someone via IP address any longer, if you don't want to be identified. I'm not saying it can not be done, but I don't think most have the availability to unmask some of the cutting edge tech stuff. JMO and experience.