Kaitlyn Bristowe - Shawn Booth - Bachelorette 11 - #2 - Discussion

We don't know the real Kaitlyn. We only see Snaps of her life. I prefer to be kind & treat people the way I want to be treated. I think bullying on sm is just mean. JMO.

I don't know if Kaitlyn even knows herself. What she says and what she does have shown to be a pattern of inconsistency and on things that matter like anti-bullying she has not demonstrated a pattern of behaviour to be considered a role model, imo.

Her speech at TEDxVancouver doesn't make her a role model, no matter how good the speech may be -- and I fully expect it to be a good speech because Speakers are edited and proofread by a team and if the speech is not up to par the team will redraft and write the speech for the person if needed (so the words themselves may not be written by Kaitlyn at all).

A speech at TEDx does not a role model make but rather a consistent pattern and history of accomplishments that can be seen as actual evidence where a positive difference has been made is what does. JMO

AllAboutLove wrote:I don't know if Kaitlyn even knows herself. What she says and what she does have shown to be a pattern of inconsistency and on things that matter like anti-bullying she has not demonstrated a pattern of behaviour to be considered a role model, imo.

Her speech at TEDxVancouver doesn't make her a role model, no matter how good the speech may be -- and I fully expect it to be a good speech because Speakers are edited and proofread by a team and if the speech is not up to par the team will redraft and write the speech for the person if needed.

A speech at TEDx does not a role model make but rather a consistent pattern and history of accomplishments that can be seen as actual evidence where a positive difference has been made is what does. JMO

I've been looking through the websites and the list/bio's/accomplishments of the speakers, and I literally shake my head and ask why Kaitlyn is there.

Member of the Order of Canada (second highest award for merit in Canada) and former mayor, Planetary Entrepreneur who captures HD photo's of earth, Mohamed Fahmy award winning journalist, who was captured and put in jail in Egypt for 400 days along side the worst of criminals for 2 yrs and was recently released. Many others who have many Juno awards, media awards, years of experience in writing books, and then we have Kaitlyn.

GuardianAngel wrote:I've been looking through the websites and the list/bio's/accomplishments of the speakers, and I literally shake my head and ask why Kaitlyn is there.

Member of the Order of Canada (second highest award for merit in Canada) and former mayor, Planetary Entrepreneur who captures HD photo's of earth, Mohamed Fahmy award winning journalist, who was captured and put in jail in Egypt for 400 days along side the worst of criminals for 2 yrs and was recently released. Many others who have many Juno awards, media awards, years of experience in writing books, and then we have Kaitlyn.

I have literally shaken my head as well, GA, and cannot begin to say how perplexed I am that Kaitlyn is speaking. TEDx events are purposely made to showcase some of the best and the brightest minds and the most inspirational people of their communities. It blows my mind that Kaitlyn is included in this list of speakers, especially when the theme is "identity".

Even if someone writes her speech for her (it won't surprise me), even if she focuses on her "identity" as a Reality-TV person who chooses to "be herself" and "not conform" and have an "eff everyone else" attitude and a "live in the moment" pattern of behavior and spin all of this as inspirational... it still begs the question: What has Kaitlyn actually done?   Because TEDx is a big deal when it comes to the purpose in emphasizing the best and brightest and those who have accomplished rare achievements and accolades (many of these speakers are actual inventors).

What has Kaitlyn done to be considered worthy of a platform like this other than be Bette 11 who accomplished having sex pre-FS?   Is it that her identity is not limited to a Reality-TV show? Her identity is not limited to social media backlash? Or any other such "obvious" stuff. One doesn't need her to speak at a TEDx event to let this be known. First she could prove otherwise on her own and then, after having actually accomplished something similar to her fellow TEDxVancouver speakers have already done, be given this platform.

If anything, this only teaches Kaitlyn she has to do very, very little to be worthy of what others who have accomplished so, so much, have to do before they are given this platform.

IMO she should feel embarrassed to be included in a lineup like that. I don't know how this opportunity came about, nor do I care, but if I were her I'd feel like a total fraud.

mindless wrote:IMO she should feel embarrassed to be included in a lineup like that. I don't know how this opportunity came about, nor do I care, but if I were her I'd feel like a total fraud.

Sadly, I think Kaitlyn probably feels she deserves to be there and being there in the first place only reinforces this delusion.

Two of the speakers today have already been in Time's magazine and are inventors for technology that can change the world for the better.

Kaitlyn's invention is what? Having pre-FS and it being recorded on a mic as Bette?

I just checked and she might come off as ok. She is after an author and drag queen and before the Cansdian women's soccer coach.

ETA: Wanted to add that yes, I can only imagine how big her head is going to be after this. 

mindless wrote:IMO she should feel embarrassed to be included in a lineup like that. I don't know how this opportunity came about, nor do I care, but if I were her I'd feel like a total fraud.

Interesting. I'm glad she doesn't see herself as a failure or someone who should be ashamed as herself. That in itself could be the topic of a great talk speaking on how much women judge each other and tear each other down and how to try to stay above that once you become a public figure.

I feel like she should feel privileged to have been asked and included and proud of herself for having the guts to do it when so many people might be prejudging her of not being worthy and judging her. I'm glad she wouldn't refuse a once in a lifetime opportunity because of what some detractors might say. I hope she rises to the occasion, does a great job and enjoys and grows from the whole experience.

Kaitlyn is indeed privileged to be at TEDxVancouver.
She can learn a lot from the actions of the other speakers who have demonstrated history of merit/accomplishment.

What takes true guts is actually DOING something based on one's words.
Without that pattern of action, talk is cheap... even if it is a TEDx talk.

relaxing wrote:

mindless wrote:IMO she should feel embarrassed to be included in a lineup like that. I don't know how this opportunity came about, nor do I care, but if I were her I'd feel like a total fraud.

Interesting.  I'm glad she doesn't see herself as a failure or someone who should be ashamed as herself.  That in itself could be the topic of a great talk speaking on how much women judge each other and tear each other down and how to try to stay above that once you become a public figure.

I feel like she should feel privileged to have been asked and included and proud of herself for having the guts to do it when so many people might be prejudging her of not being worthy and judging her.  I'm glad she wouldn't refuse a once in a lifetime opportunity because of what some detractors might say.  I hope she rises to the occasion, does a great job and enjoys and grows from the whole experience.

I never said she should see herself as a failure. I just don't think she should see herself as worthy of this kind of a platform either. There's a lot in between a failure and a pioneer, and the latter she is not. JMO.

AllAboutLove wrote:Kaitlyn is indeed privileged to be at TEDxVancouver.
She can learn a lot from the actions of the other speakers who have demonstrated history of merit/accomplishment.

What takes true guts is actually DOING something based on one's words.
Without that pattern of action, talk is cheap... even if it is a TEDx talk.

She may indeed deliver a great speech, but I yet to see how her actions match with her words consistently. Of course she can fight back and defend herself on sm but don't tell me she either "ignores" or simply "asks why" when facing negativity. I would love to admit it when she proves me wrong though.

relaxing wrote:*snipped*

I feel like she should feel privileged to have been asked and included and proud of herself for having the guts to do it when so many people might be prejudging her of not being worthy and judging her.  I'm glad she wouldn't refuse a once in a lifetime opportunity because of what some detractors might say.  I hope she rises to the occasion, does a great job and enjoys and grows from the whole experience.

Regarding the bolded: no one is judging who Kaitlyn is as a person. There's a vast difference between judging someone as a person and determining their worthiness of being on a TEDx stage or being a role model for young women or women in general which is exactly my issue with Kaitlyn.

I just recently watched "Suffragette". Women fought literally and figuratively and made huge sacrifices and even died so that ultimately and because of their right to vote, they would have the right to do as they want, especially with their own bodies.

But at no point in time do I think to myself that a girl who does a reality-TV show and chooses to have pre-Fantasy Suite sex and have this mic-ed on television is someone who is a role model for young women or women everywhere.

At no point do I say to myself that Kaitlyn is who I hope young girls and women of society aspire to be. That women like Kim Kardashian can be seen as a role model for young women all due to her sex tape and Kaitlyn can be seen as a role model by young women due to her reality-TV stint and be put on a platform, which is exactly what TEDx is doing, shows me that there is something gone disturbingly awry with what constitutes role models, imho.

Whether Kaitlyn is a good person or not no one is making that judgement, but what I do know is that I fear for a society where someone like Kaitlyn can be seen as a role model when, in 2015, there are millions of women on this planet who have yet to even be seen as autonomous beings apart from the patriarchal systems they dwell in.

That there are still countries where women have yet to be able to vote (Saudi Arabia has promised the vote to women only this year) and yet, somehow, in an obsessed fame culture (because I have ZERO doubt that Kaitlyn got to be where she is other than just because of fame) someone like Kaitlyn being put in a position to be seen as a role model, is, imho, a detriment to the very causes that are worth caring about and role models worth aspiring to become like.

So to me, if there was to be a TEDx talk worth discussing and worth focusing on "Identity", which is the theme of TEDxVancouver, it should be: Why do we lower the bar so much when it comes to role models?

Why is it that too often, role models are based on a person being famous for being famous and the number of social media followers a person has, or how controversial they can be, or what little they can contribute to bringing about lasting and impactful positive change in society?

Now that is a TEDxTalk I would find to be relevant and refreshing and not Kaitlyn talking about herself as a reality-TV star and just a "normal" person who has spent most of her post-Bette filming time drinking, partying, snapchatting, and doing precious little to deserve to be considered a role model on anything other than what not to do.

JMHO