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Nick Viall - Bachelorette 11 - *Spoilers - Sleuthing* - Discussion #5

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Post by SueSt Fri Jun 26, 2015 10:53 am

chasingpavements wrote:(snipped) I think that if Shawn was absolutely the one from the begining, no questions asked, she wouldn't have appeared that smitten when Nick came in NY, she wouldn't have had sex with him, and she wouldn't have kept him after she realized how much Shawn hated him and was actually ready to leave because of it. She would have let him go, no matter how much it pissed off the producers or hurt her reputation.

IA, Chasingpavements... and (I think we can assume) the fact that K had sex with Nick TWICE, even after Shawn hated him and threatened to leave... really brings your point home!! :yes:
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Post by SueSt Fri Jun 26, 2015 10:57 am

california90 wrote:
I was super excited haha. I thought at the time that K would be a better match than Andi. I think K brings the spunky, fun side that Nick LOVES... and she's very physical, which Nick likes to pursue, however I think Nick DOES need someone that connects with him also on a deeper, soul-like level. There is a reason why "he's less fun" or "more serious". He's deff a tough one to match IMO because he's a bit more complex than some of the other guys.  

I don't know K, but I know Nick appreciated that Andi was able to not only keep up with him mentally, but challenged him too.
IA that Nick needs someone who is more complex and sharp.
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Post by SueSt Fri Jun 26, 2015 10:59 am

chasingpavements wrote: I actually think that Nick needs someone like Andi, and that Andi needs someone like Nick (instead of the typical jock she goes for).
Needless to say ITA! Nick knew it too, too bad she didn't.
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Post by Alanna Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:00 am

I think Nick is looking for a more, hmmm, equal (?) relationship; otoh, Kaitlyn seems to be looking for a man where she can be super silly and carefree and he'll take care of both of them. Jmo.


Big: You know, Manhattan has a lot of beautiful women.
Carrie: What an amazing observation!
Big: But the thing is, after awhile, you just wanna be with the one who makes you laugh.
~ Sex and the City

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Post by SueSt Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:04 am

happygolucky wrote:I believe Kaitlyn isn't shallow or superficial, but she is simple and there's a difference.
It all comes down to personal priorities and lifestyle. What's important to you and what power of control do you have, what knowledge you possess and what you do about it? Do you try to find a meaning, search for understanding of things that surround you?
I live in a culture where the usual "dinner conversation" would be about politics, economy, society&ordinance, environment, ... by "Ian's standards" we are a family of deep thinkers.

What's the point of "talking" and "thinking" if you don't act on it, do something about it, make a change, create an opportunity and contribute to the better world?
It's just a waste of time and energy
, it's not productive and it doesn't make you better than others.

My grandparents are simple people, who feed off their land that they cultivate and live on. I could judge them as being ignorant for not knowing about the political situation in the government, for not knowing the lobbyist and laws, for not knowing about the corruption in water/energy aggregation policy and could accuse them of making superficial choices when they cast their votes ... but that's because I'm involved in this world because of my career and lifestyle, not them, I have knowledge and motive to know those things and talk about it and do something about it. And if I don't do something about it, that's my ignorance.

So the real depth IMO is how people deal with the information they have, with the means they dispose of and with the opportunities that are available to them.

I may see Nick and Kaitlyn as 2 similar people in some regards, both deep thinkers for what is in their interest, but with 2 different lifestyles and therefor the priorities might not be aligned.
Kaitlyn choosing Shawn over Nick doesn't make her shallow, it just makes her a person who seeks a simple life, a companion who is aligned with her trajectory. And the world is complicated enough already, so I salute her decision.

hi yes bestbud!
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Post by AllAboutLove Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:05 am

Alanna wrote:I think Nick is looking for a more, hmmm, equal (?) relationship; otoh, Kaitlyn seems to be looking for a man where she can be super silly and carefree and he'll take care of both of them. Jmo.
IA and based on her decision, Kaitlyn supports this theory. She is a strong woman but wants an alpha with whom she can be beta and she chose one. Nick is more of an equal partner where neither partner is beta or alpha but just a mutual partnership. jmo
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Post by Nibbles22 Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:07 am

Alanna wrote:I think Nick is looking for a more, hmmm, equal (?) relationship; otoh, Kaitlyn seems to be looking for a man where she can be super silly and carefree and he'll take care of both of them. Jmo.

I have yet to see Kaitlyn super silly and carefree with Shawn, but rather the opposite. JMO, but he seems uptight, serious, jealous, and someone needing to be handled with kid gloves. There is no zen in this relationship, based on the edit.
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Post by AllAboutLove Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:11 am

Nibbles22 wrote:
Alanna wrote:I think Nick is looking for a more, hmmm, equal (?) relationship; otoh, Kaitlyn seems to be looking for a man where she can be super silly and carefree and he'll take care of both of them. Jmo.

I have yet to see Kaitlyn super silly and carefree with Shawn, but rather the opposite.  JMO, but he seems uptight, serious, jealous, and someone needing to be handled with kid gloves.  There is no zen in this relationship, based on the edit.
I think maybe Kaitlyn prefers to be super silly with her friends and less with her lover/partner.
So maybe that is the balance she seeks between social life and relationship?
Because I agree, even taking the edit into consideration, I don't think Kaitlyn will be as silly with Shawn but I don't know if she wants to be anyway.

Back to Nick, I think perhaps this means that her relationship with Nick was too much sexy/silly and not intense somber enough since Nick can be really silly and goofy.
Thus not balancing her out although Nick said she balanced him out. jmo
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Post by SueSt Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:16 am

Alanna wrote:I think Nick is looking for a more, hmmm, equal (?) relationship; otoh, Kaitlyn seems to be looking for a man where she can be super silly and carefree and he'll take care of both of them. Jmo.

ITA Alanna. :yes:
I don't think Nick is the right choice for every woman.
He's definitely not traditional. And we've talked about this before, but I see him with someone that's more comfortable in a more fluid and equal :yes: partnership.
When I was younger and less sure of who I was, I might have rejected him too in favor of someone that had a more set persona...
But damn can I appreciate him now!! :yes: beatingheart beatingheart
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Post by stuckinsc Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:29 am

I agree with you as well Alanna, I am glad Kaitlyn found her happy and I don't think she and Nick would have been each other's happy. Like Nick told the guys he was lucky Andi chose Josh, I think in time he will see that he is lucky that Kaitlyn chose Shawn. When it is the right woman for Nick she will know and he won't be second choice Hugesmile
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Post by mprssdbyu Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:35 am

This is def one of those endings, third in a row I may have gotten wrong...I think N lets K be K...she seems to be the true K as in free spirited and living every moment emotionally to the fullest w N. Would her carefree worry free attitude (when not dating other men) left him with not enough depth in another partner...maybe. I like S with K from what I've seen but is he the best match for her? I'm really interested in watching the dynamic play out between each relationship..regarding the last 2.


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It's about learning to dance in the rain
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Post by AllAboutLove Fri Jun 26, 2015 12:35 pm

stuckinsc wrote:I agree with you as well Alanna, I am glad Kaitlyn found her happy and I don't think she and Nick would have been each other's happy. Like Nick told the guys he was lucky Andi chose Josh, I think in time he will see that he is lucky that Kaitlyn chose Shawn. When it is the right woman for Nick she will know and he won't be second choice Hugesmile
By Nick's own words, I think he may already know this, especially the second time around.
He said that no matter how magical connection he feels with Kaitlyn he doesn't want to be with a girl who thinks there is a better fit for her.
And I would think most people wouldn't want to be with someone who preferred someone else over them.
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