The Bachelorette 11 - Kaitlyn Bristowe - #8 - Media - Tweets - IG - *Sleuthing - Spoilers* - Discussion

GypsySarah wrote:My objection to K's interview was when she said the ocean sex was glossed over. No, it wasn't, and neither were the actions of the past leads, whether male or female. They all received flack over FS sex with someone other than who they chose. Terribly naive of her to believe that her pre-FS sex wouldn't garner even more flack. Sorry to rain on her parade. Women are empowered these days, but the real power comes from having respect for ourselves and our bodies.
Whether Shawn or Nick, I don't think it will last.

I do agree with this.  I've been shaking my head when she says this.  Ben and JP were not well liked after their ocean escapades. Again, it's not the sex I have a problem with at all, it's the disregard for the men and for the job she has to do until the end of the show.  I'm sure many leads have wanted to but resisted or not been given the opportunity.  I was repulsed by Ben's ocean scene and the utter disregard for the other girls, then again I found him pretty hard to like in any way.  I'm giving Kaitlyn more excuses and ignoring it more, because I actually really do like her.  But still found the incident in very poor taste and character.

I agree that Kaitlyn's sexual escapade(s) were a poor decision. But I also remember some poor decisions I made at her age. Thank God my errors were not public. This glass-house dweller will not throw stones.

A bit more about Nick that the ET interview previously left out:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0RhE9uuGzk

K: "He was always very supportive of me so that doesn't surprise me"


Edit: Note that past tense ^^ if there was any doubt that he wasn't f1...

^^In that clip, K sounded very positive toward N. Thanks for posting that!

"Can I tell you something. Nick is pretty cute"

........you ain't kidding!

Dying2share wrote:"Can I tell you something.  Nick is pretty cute"

........you ain't kidding!

Haha! And she did an interview with him post-ATFR last year so she would know!

stuckinsc wrote:

Lucas15 wrote:

AllAboutLove wrote:Jmho: The other guys clearly knew that Shawn had off-camera time. Shawn told them. Why tell the guys this unless to let them know that he has something more than they do? Why not keep something personal like that personal?

IMO I believe I know the answer to that but totally understand why a guy would understand it but a woman would not. I don't have time to fully explain so for now I'll just say it's instinctive and territorial - guys don't piss on a chair to mark their territory when it comes to competing for a woman, but they would do exactly this.

Lucas, I understand what you are saying and agree. My confusion is why it is good or adorable when Shawn does it but smug or sneaky when Nick did it last year or Britt did it with CS? Seems like a double standard and I personally don't like double standards.

I didn't present the notion to suggest it's good or adorable - just understandable. As AllAboutLove posted upthread,

there's thousands or millions of years of evolutionary instincts that governed our ancestors and which we inherited that give us instinctive reactions - not necessarily thought through on a conscious level.

She got exactly what I was thinking and there's no way I could have expressed it better than, or probably as well as she did. For what it's worth, Nick regaled the guys with tales of his date with Kaitlyn, including them retiring at the end of the day to her room, though he stopped short of a full disclosure of what happened there. Nick was doing exactly the same thing that Shawn did - marking his territory by letting the other guys know. I give Nick the same pass (for this anyway) as I give Shawn - I understand why they both did what they did. In fact, Nick did it better because he did it to all the guys and Shawn apparently only to Joe.

I also think that these inherited / genetic instincts explain a lot about the attraction that Kaitlyn experienced that lead to the choice she made.

happydays wrote:A bit more about Nick that the ET interview previously left out:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0RhE9uuGzk

K: "He was always very supportive of me so that doesn't surprise me"


Edit: Note that past tense ^^ if there was any doubt that he wasn't f1...

Once again she says she is not sorry for having sex with Nick just the timing!

relaxing wrote:I do agree with this.  I've been shaking my head when she says this.  Ben and JP were not well liked after their ocean escapades. Again, it's not the sex I have a problem with at all, it's the disregard for the men and for the job she has to do until the end of the show.  I'm sure many leads have wanted to but resisted or not been given the opportunity.  I was repulsed by Ben's ocean scene and the utter disregard for the other girls, then again I found him pretty hard to like in any way.  I'm giving Kaitlyn more excuses and ignoring it more, because I actually really do like her.  But still found the incident in very poor taste and character.

Perfectly understandable reactions to both events. If we like someone we tend to give them a pass for doing something that we would criticize when done by someone we don't like.

I was never repulsed by what Ben did - I only felt that it locked him into a specific choice very early because it would be hard to explain that to someone else if he chose someone else. I feel much the same about Kaitlyn - her choice to have sex with Nick would be understandable - and a bit romantic - if she chose Nick; but it became hard to explain and an issue that she needed to deal with if she chose someone else. Since it appears she planned to choose someone else even at the time, and she did choose someone else, she left herself with a problem that she needed to explain to her choice. The risk that decision created is that she might not have been able to choose who she wanted, though it appears that somehow worked out - we just haven't seen how.

lucas15 wrote:Nick regaled the guys with tales of his date with Kaitlyn, including them retiring at the end of the day to her room, though he stopped short of a full disclosure of what happened there. Nick was doing exactly the same thing that Shawn did - marking his territory by letting the other guys know.

The rest of the post I clipped this quote from seemed 'right on' to me, but want to comment on this part. What we have been told in the past is that when a guy returns from a date, the producers prod them in front of the group to tell the deets. I don't have confirmation that they do this, it's just been said on this forum by those who seemed to know.

It's interesting this season with all the references made on camera to things that happened off camera. To be fair to Shawn for telling the guys, they may well have him on camera telling the guys about K's visits after being prodded to do so by producers, but left that on the cutting room floor for their story purposes.

With all of that going on, I can't imagine the cameras didn't catch it all. Which just brings me back to feeling the K/S relationship was too obvious and they needed a good distraction. I can't wait to hear Ben's discussion with K about her time in their room.

Knowing all this "extra" information about Shawn and Kait, I feel like she actually, really cheated on him with Nick, regardless of the format of the show. I'm going to be fascinated to see him get over this, especially now that we also learned about his parents' divorce, which must be the reason there are zero pics or mentions of his mom anywhere in his sm.

Alanna wrote:Knowing all this "extra" information about Shawn and Kait, I feel like she actually, really cheated on him with Nick, regardless of the format of the show. I'm going to be fascinated to see him get over this, especially now that we also learned about his parents' divorce, which must be the reason there are zero pics or mentions of his mom anywhere in his sm.

In his ABC profile in response to the question of what marriage means to him, Shawn responds that's its a special bond that nothing can break. Maybe by the time she told him he was in too deep with his feelings and was able to forgive.