Married At First Sight - Season 2 - Sean Varricchio - Davina Kullar - *Sleuthing - Spoilers* #3

WatcheronWall wrote:

justify14 wrote:I think if people see what Davina and her friend have done on social media is why I cannot support her. It has nothing to do with the show. I am a professional woman who had a guilty pleasure Married at First Sight.  

Davina simply does not impress me.  She may have gotten the bad edit as the villain, but she still seems unwilling to ever compromise.  And that to me makes a BAD partner and most likely will be a person who only has her friend Chris is her life since they obviously feed each others egos.

I really am not in support of Sean, so much as I can see why he would not compromise for someone who does not compromise.  His job is so much more stressful that hers...sorry,  to those who think we should all band behind her as someone who was wronged I am just not in that camp.

You are not the first to say she would not compromise.  But  for the life of me I do not know what she was supposed to compromise on!  Sean was only there for 10 of the days, which I am guessing were the filing days. She said from the start that location was her deal breaker. So what else was there to compromise about? And how does one compromise with someone who is not actually there?

I agree with you. I think if Davina was set up with a guy who was a professional at her level (or higher) and lived in or near Manhattan and she was attracted to him, we would have seen a whole other Davina. When she first met Sean and even on the honeymoon episode, we saw a far softer and flirtier side to her.

As far as what to compromise on ...she said she wanted to stay in Manhattan the upper east side is probably the farthest point on Manhattan for Sean to get to work. For the month that she was had to live with him, they could have chosen a temporary apartment near southwest side(Tribecca)...much easier to get out of Manhattan for Sean. I live in the area so understand the logistics.

I had to commute 3 days a week to Philly by car and I live in Jersey close to Manhattan. My hubby is in Manhattan for work.

Also there are tons of tolls that needed to be paid in making the commute that Sean had to pay as well. I am just saying I felt his pain.

WatcheronWall wrote:

justify14 wrote:I think if people see what Davina and her friend have done on social media is why I cannot support her. It has nothing to do with the show. I am a professional woman who had a guilty pleasure Married at First Sight.  

Davina simply does not impress me.  She may have gotten the bad edit as the villain, but she still seems unwilling to ever compromise.  And that to me makes a BAD partner and most likely will be a person who only has her friend Chris is her life since they obviously feed each others egos.

I really am not in support of Sean, so much as I can see why he would not compromise for someone who does not compromise.  His job is so much more stressful that hers...sorry,  to those who think we should all band behind her as someone who was wronged I am just not in that camp.

You are not the first to say she would not compromise.  But  for the life of me I do not know what she was supposed to compromise on!  Sean was only there for 10 of the days, which I am guessing were the filing days. She said from the start that location was her deal breaker. So what else was there to compromise about? And how does one compromise with someone who is not actually there?

Maybe compromise is not the right word. The things I think about when I say this is things like when she was "having a moment" on the honeymoon. When he asked her if she was having a moment, she said she was but then instead of telling him why, or what was making her feel that way, or what she was even feeling, she said nothing, got indignant because he couldn't read her mind and didn't give her the reaction she wanted and then complained about that situation afterward during her interviews. She did not make communication easy. If that were me in that situation and he said, "Are you having a moment?" I would have said, "Yes! It's so beautiful here and I just can't believe we're doing this, it's surreal and I'm really enjoying it so far!" and he probably would have kissed her and agreed and they would have moved on. Instead, she turned it into something negative by expecting him to read her mind. Another thing I think about is the fact that she NEVER went back to Jersey with him after the day she spent there over Christmas. Never. Not until the very end when they did the messages in a bottle. I am certain that some time in that 42 days she could have made the effort to at least go there once or twice. He made that drive himself to come to Manhattan with her, she wouldn't go with him and then complained that they didn't spend enough time together.

I think, like most do at this point, that Sean's intentions were not on the up and up going into this. However, I think had she continued with her actual personality, the soft flirty side we saw at the wedding, things would have been more tolerable. He made her defenses go up but she reciprocated. And it's these types of things that I've mentioned that I think about when I say that she needs to take accountability for her part in it. Because she did play a part. It wasn't as shady of a part as Sean played in retrospect, but I believe even if Sean was 100% sincere there would have been issues because she is always suspicious of people's motives, wants everything her way, and has issues with communication.

justify14 wrote:As far as what to compromise on ...she said she wanted to stay in Manhattan the upper east side is probably the farthest point on Manhattan for Sean to get to work.  For the month that she was had to live with him, they could have chosen a temporary apartment near southwest side(Tribecca)...much easier to get out of Manhattan for Sean.  I live in the area so understand the logistics.  

I had to commute 3 days a week to Philly by car and I live in Jersey close to Manhattan.  My hubby is in Manhattan for work.  

Also there are tons of tolls that needed to be paid in making the commute that Sean had to pay as well.  I am just saying I felt his pain.

In her defense that is the ONLY deal breaker for her and she was upfront about it before the match. It would be entirely unfair to ask anyone to compromise on their stated deal breaker. It does not matter if you I
Or I or anyone else thinks it's wrong, it was hers and she was honest about it from the start. But given Sean's other issues, Davina could have tied herself into pretzels for him and it would have made not one bit of difference. Sean had no intention of staying married to anyone. He was just launching his "career in TV" IMO

TwinkleB13 wrote:

WatcheronWall wrote:

justify14 wrote:I think if people see what Davina and her friend have done on social media is why I cannot support her. It has nothing to do with the show. I am a professional woman who had a guilty pleasure Married at First Sight.  

Davina simply does not impress me.  She may have gotten the bad edit as the villain, but she still seems unwilling to ever compromise.  And that to me makes a BAD partner and most likely will be a person who only has her friend Chris is her life since they obviously feed each others egos.

I really am not in support of Sean, so much as I can see why he would not compromise for someone who does not compromise.  His job is so much more stressful that hers...sorry,  to those who think we should all band behind her as someone who was wronged I am just not in that camp.

You are not the first to say she would not compromise.  But  for the life of me I do not know what she was supposed to compromise on!  Sean was only there for 10 of the days, which I am guessing were the filing days. She said from the start that location was her deal breaker. So what else was there to compromise about? And how does one compromise with someone who is not actually there?

Maybe compromise is not the right word.  The things I think about when I say this is things like when she was "having a moment" on the honeymoon.  When he asked her if she was having a moment, she said she was but then instead of telling him why, or what was making her feel that way, or what she was even feeling, she said nothing, got indignant because he couldn't read her mind and didn't give her the reaction she wanted and then complained about that situation afterward during her interviews.  She did not make communication easy.  If that were me in that situation and he said, "Are you having a moment?" I would have said, "Yes!  It's so beautiful here and I just can't believe we're doing this, it's surreal and I'm really enjoying it so far!" and he probably would have kissed her and agreed and they would have moved on.  Instead, she turned it into something negative by expecting him to read her mind.  Another thing I think about is the fact that she NEVER went back to Jersey with him after the day she spent there over Christmas. Never.  Not until the very end when they did the messages in a bottle.  I am certain that some time in that 42 days she could have made the effort to at least go there once or twice.  He made that drive himself to come to Manhattan with her, she wouldn't go with him and then complained that they didn't spend enough time together.  

I think, like most do at this point, that Sean's intentions were not on the up and up going into this.  However, I think had she continued with her actual personality, the soft flirty side we saw at the wedding, things would have been more tolerable.  He made her defenses go up but she reciprocated.  And it's these types of things that I've mentioned that I think about when I say that she needs to take accountability for her part in it.  Because she did play a part.  It wasn't as shady of a part as Sean played in retrospect, but I believe even if Sean was 100% sincere there would have been issues because she is always suspicious of people's motives, wants everything her way, and has issues with communication.

.

I do not recall Sean ever asking her to go to NJ. JerseyNurse said that Sean did not want his personal life and the show mixed so maybe he did not want her around his family or friends? And I am pretty sure his parents would not have welcomed a visit anyway they seemed very against the entire matter. Edited typo

WatcheronWall wrote:
I do not recall Sean ever asking her to go to NJ. JerseyNurse said that Sean did not want his personal life and the show mixed so maybe he did not want her around his family or friends? And I am pretty sure his parents would not have welcomed a visit anyway they seemed very against the entire matter. Edited typo

Not saying that she should have gone to hang out with his family or even been on film. They only spent 10 days together and that was partly because she never went to NJ with him. He was fine for them to be filming in his home when they were there for Christmas, so I can't see why he wouldn't have her to his place again or how it would be different.

TwinkleB13 wrote:

WatcheronWall wrote:
I do not recall Sean ever asking her to go to NJ. JerseyNurse said that Sean did not want his personal life and the show mixed so maybe he did not want her around his family or friends? And I am pretty sure his parents would not have welcomed a visit anyway they seemed very against the entire matter. Edited typo

Not saying that she should have gone to hang out with his family or even been on film.  They only spent 10 days together and that was partly because she never went to NJ with him.  He was fine for them to be filming in his home when they were there for Christmas, so I can't see why he wouldn't have her to his place again or how it would be different.  

I don't think Sean wanted to get to know Davina and I think that is where her frustration and hurt come from.

IMO, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.  Based on Davina's behaviors and expressed opinions, that's how she would live the rest of her life until there's a change.  She will always find something or someone toward whom all the blames for the consequence of her actions would be placed.  It takes a real strength and courage to look inside through all our shortcomings.  She fears what she might find inside herself, and until she gathers the true strength to look inside, she'll constantly project her fears onto others.  What we fear inside, we project outside.

Dr. C mentioned on another board, one of the things Davina could have compromised on (but chose not to), was the "interim" apartment for 1 month.  

He says that Davina knows NY like the back of her hand and she could have chosen an apartment in a different part of NY that would have cut Sean's commute down by 45 mins-1 hour.  This may have made a big difference for Sean in adjusting to NY and married life.

@jerseynurse - I'm curious if Sean ever talked about the vetting process? Did he ever mention what he had to go through, did they do background checks, STD, etc?

I want to know if the rumor is true that the women had a much more extensive process than the men. I know the network put out a statement today about the process but I don't believe anything they have to say....or the experts.

I would think that if they tested the guys for STD's, the network would just come right out and say it. Instead, they make blanket statements that include the screening process across seasons 1-3.

And they completely dodge the DUI issue altogether, as if it were a parking ticket he failed to pay.

Didn't Davina go bowling w/Sean in NJ? Isn't that where they littered into the water?