The Bachelorette 11 - Kaitlyn Bristowe - #7 - Media - Tweets - IG - *Sleuthing - Spoilers* - Discussion

AllAboutLove wrote:Based on K's own words she has said N was there for the right reasons. If she felt otherwise she could have left it vague and ambiguous but she has been emphatic about Nick being genuinely there for her. This is a positive view of Nick from Kaitlyn.

I could see her being someone who can be friendly with Nick post-show (like Becca) and Nick has been very supportive post-show -- taking the higher road and b/c she lives with no regrets. It was only when Nick was about to appear on the show that she started untagging/hiding, etc.

No way, imo, that Shawn would allow Kaitlyn to be friends with Nick post-show. He wants N to be "the other guy" only. Anything K does now is not just for herself. Her blog is post-snapchat and we know she is with Shawn. If she had to reassure Shawn when Nick was brought on the filming-show it is no surprise to me that she will reassure him once again when he is appearing on the tv-show. The parallels are there - engaged or not. jmho

IA and to me this indicates that Shawn isn't putting pressure on her to rewrite history and isn't as jealous, possessive, psychotic as the show will make us think, I'm assuming. She is still neutral/positive about him.

I don't think they're going to be support system besties anymore but I also don't think she feels that much pressure to pretend there was never anything there and start to "hate" Nick. 

Also, a segue, does this girl not have any friends who can be a support system? She needed to go find a random dude on sm she's never seen or met before for her support system? Was her mom too busy to talk to her or something???? Weird.

okay

Ok..I have never posted a opinion about anyone really ( well other than Britt whoops ) but the problem for the Bachelorette is the majority of us on this forum are female and so we identify with the Bachelorette more so than the Bachelor and thus judge her harder than we judge the Bachelor...because if " we" we're the Bachelorette we would think it's so obvious that Shawn is best...we wouldn't sleep with anyone else..etc..Nick is not there for right reasons ...etc..I have no idea how difficult and weird it must be in that Bachelorette bubble...you sign on knowing the producers manipulate both you and the footage..your trying to get to know these guys while other guys are awkwardly standing around waiting for you.it must be the most confusing time..so chances are u will do things you regret ( as we all do in life - no one is perfect) and Kaitlyn just happens to have a TV crew filming these mistake/timing errors...also we should all think back to how we all felt with other Bachelorettes.
Meredith?-everyone was being horrible for her choosing Ian and saying she led other guy ( can't remember his name.?)
Jen schefft- she just looked disinterested in everyone!
Deanna- obviously only wanted Graham and so when he left it was a crapshoot
Ashley?- everyone thought she was into Bentley and couldn't believe she would be?
Des- no one thought it would last with her and Chris cause she was in love with Brooks
Andi- how could she sleep with Nick?we would never have done that on FS and gotten engaged..
I guess the point is we try to place ourselves in their shoes - which is fun but at the same time I don't think we could possibly imagine all that is going on behind the scenes,the footage of conversations etc that are missing...I think they go in to into thinking this will be great exposure and a fun experience but ends up being confusing,scary and exhausting...and who makes a good decision when they are exhausted and confused? :shocked!:

I don't think Nick and kaitlin were really friends before the show. Sure they flirted a little on SM and "supported" each other but friends? Imo--no. I think once the show is over (and it is) they will go back to how it was before the show minus the SM flirting. They both "scratched their itch," and will move on.

I think kaitlin "explored" all her options, and in the end, her attraction to shawn was obviously the strongest. I can't wait to see how it plays out.

I agree with soccermom, that there was no real friendship between Kaitlyn and Nick prior to the show. I believe they started to bond over similar experience and probably found each others' SM company exciting and fun, so that over time it became part of their daily life, something that they would use to brighten own day. That leaded to some "unspoken" attraction, not yet a crush, but a present desire and a sense of mutual sympathy that can put a smile on anyone's face. In a way, Nick coming on the show was the best solution for both. They got a chance to actually meet, spend quality time together, get to know the reality of their characters, act on their attraction ... and get it out of their system.
No harm done. Only ... that there were other men involved ... and someone's feelings might got bruised along the way. But IMHO there's no guilty party if you believe things needed to happen in order for the conclusions to be made.

happygolucky wrote:I agree with soccermom, that there was no real friendship between Kaitlyn and Nick prior to the show. I believe they started to bond over similar experience and probably found each others' SM company exciting and fun, so that over time it became part of their daily life, something that they would use to brighten own day. That leaded to some "unspoken" attraction, not yet a crush, but a present desire and a sense of mutual sympathy that can put a smile on anyone's face. In a way, Nick coming on the show was the best solution for both. They got a chance to actually meet, spend quality time together, get to know the reality of their characters, act on their attraction ... and get it out of their system.
No harm done. Only ... that there were other men involved ... and someone's feelings might got bruised along the way. But IMHO there's no guilty party if you believe things needed to happen in order for the conclusions to be made.

And Nick coming on also told us a lot about the other guys and how they "deal with it" ...or don't.

I saw the cover of US, but is there something else I missed? I don't have time to read thru all the pages. Do we know that Shawn is really upset with Kaitlyn, or is it all speculation from the magazine?

happygolucky wrote:I agree with soccermom, that there was no real friendship between Kaitlyn and Nick prior to the show. I believe they started to bond over similar experience and probably found each others' SM company exciting and fun, so that over time it became part of their daily life, something that they would use to brighten own day. That leaded to some "unspoken" attraction, not yet a crush, but a present desire and a sense of mutual sympathy that can put a smile on anyone's face. In a way, Nick coming on the show was the best solution for both. They got a chance to actually meet, spend quality time together, get to know the reality of their characters, act on their attraction ... and get it out of their system.
No harm done. Only ... that there were other men involved ... and someone's feelings might got bruised along the way. But IMHO there's no guilty party if you believe things needed to happen in order for the conclusions to be made.

There were other men involved and they know, or should know, how this silly show works. Feelings are not right or wrong and I bet shawn did feel a little jealous. I bet he got caught up in the bubble and knew he was the one, or wanted to be the one so bad, that it was hard for him to compartmentalize. It will be interesting for sure to see how kaitlin and shawn "get there."

They did look awfully comfortable at the snapchat.

Oh yeah Rolly, men had to show some of their character, how they deal with the "competition", how they view Kaitlyn, if they are even "diggin" her.
On that note, it's funny to me how Josh supposedly was fired up to "unmask" Nick and his real intentions towards Kaitlyn, but it only showed that he, Josh, wasn't really interested in Kaitlyn himself. He knew he wasn't going to be there till the end, he knew he had no chance with her (especially if his "friendship" with Shawn was strong), his man-intuition must had told him that Kaitlyn wasn't much into him ... so it's funny that each year there's one "honorable" guy who "sacrifices" himself for the sake of this process/game... but his motives aren't questioned.

stuckinsc wrote:Okay, seriously, Shawn is mad at what she did on the show?  Grow up man.  She is the bachelorette, she wasn't yours yet.  Sorry, I haven't watched and think Shawn and Kaitlyn look really cute together so hope they are good, but if he is making her feel bad about what she did on the show then I think she could do better.

It was her job to get to know more than one guy and let's be honest, to Kaitlyn that includes sex.  And yes she was falling in love, guess what she was probably falling in love with both of them.  Don't almost all leads fall in love with more than one person?  

Kaitlyn owes Shawn no apologies for anything that happened during taping unless she lied to him.  Now after, sure if she is dating or engaged to Shawn and having sex with others get mad.  But she was NOT Shawn's.  Sorry, but if Shawn is pouting or making Kaitlyn feel bad about herself, then I am anti-Shawn.  

And sorry, but their are a million guy personal trainers who like kids, so really, you aren't all that special, just the bachelor flavor of the week.

Wow - had to respond.  IMO Shawn is coming off so well on the show and becoming one of my favorites.  I'm getting worried that he is the one who could do way better.  He's level headed, mature, well spoken, seemingly having a lot more depth and thoughtful nature than Kaitlyn to me.  To classify him as a personal trainer who likes kids does a disservice.

He hasn't had any big temper tantrum, he has made his understandable displeasure known with his reactions.  He has quite calmly and articulately mind you expressed his concerns to her.  His comments about her actions and words not matching and helping her to see the Joshua situation in a larger picture were spot on. He is showing kindness, respect, tenderness and real effort to let her know how he feels and getting through the surface level stuff, which although I love Kait, I agree with Ian is mostly where she's been thus far with everyone.  My reaction to the person I'm starting to fall for who brings in a guy she "knew" before filming would be exactly the same level of wariness.  Like, should I actually be letting myself go there with her?  His reaction to me proves his feelings and words to Kaitlyn are genuine and he has real feelings and is worried about a broken heart or being duped by the show.  He has been confident, sure, but never cocky to me, really quite sweet and reserved and she has given him lots of reassurances to feel confident which he has trusted enough to take at face value, to then have the rug pulled out from under him.

IMO, she sure does need to apologize and make it up to him and prove how loyal/faithful she will be once committed to him.  I wouldn't get over it.  It's not the sex, it's that while they are falling in love, she is so caught up in the moment with someone who is not him that she can completely put him out of her mind and not worry about his reaction to something that could ruin what they've started.  And she would have the opportunity shortly, during FS, where there's an implicit understanding that guys who get that far might get farther, so to say.  But she was so into someone else she couldn't wait or even see the consequences of her actions.  Would completely make me doubt how into me she was and what type of judgement she has.  Not a good sign if he's genuinely interested in having a relationship with this person, which to me he seems to be.

I have loved Kait all along, but she sure better make this up to Shawn, IMO.  Pure disrespect shown.

the part where K said Nick was her "go to" person for advise tho....not sure how that quite qualifies as not-a-friend

Alanna wrote:

AllAboutLove wrote:Based on K's own words she has said N was there for the right reasons. If she felt otherwise she could have left it vague and ambiguous but she has been emphatic about Nick being genuinely there for her. This is a positive view of Nick from Kaitlyn.

I could see her being someone who can be friendly with Nick post-show (like Becca) and Nick has been very supportive post-show -- taking the higher road and b/c she lives with no regrets. It was only when Nick was about to appear on the show that she started untagging/hiding, etc.

No way, imo, that Shawn would allow Kaitlyn to be friends with Nick post-show. He wants N to be "the other guy" only. Anything K does now is not just for herself. Her blog is post-snapchat and we know she is with Shawn. If she had to reassure Shawn when Nick was brought on the filming-show it is no surprise to me that she will reassure him once again when he is appearing on the tv-show. The parallels are there - engaged or not. jmho

IA and to me this indicates that Shawn isn't putting pressure on her to rewrite history and isn't as jealous, possessive, psychotic as the show will make us think, I'm assuming. She is still neutral/positive about him.

I don't think they're going to be support system besties anymore but I also don't think she feels that much pressure to pretend there was never anything there and start to "hate" Nick. 

More evidence of Shawn not being the jealous, possessive, psychotic type: Kaitlyn admitted to many sexual "exploits" on Ryan Seacrest's show -- having sex with Chris Soules and sending nude photos to someone she wasn't dating, etc. At that time a majority of us were so scandalized we chalked it up to the evidence of her not being with someone because there was no way a fiance/boyfriend would be okay with that. Apparently Shawn was okay with it - they were engaged at the time, and were in bed three weeks later playing video games. I think Shawn knows he can't be that way with Kaitlyn. Anyone who's with Kaitlyn can't be the jealous, possessive psychotic type because that girl is honest to a fault. I don't think Kait would let her partner dictate her friendships; that said, she may be considerate enough in the future to decrease her interaction with Nick, since it clearly bothers Shawn so much.