Re: Episode 11 - 8/1 Finale - Discussion - Thread #1

[Guest]

From the media thread, as it pertains to the Finale:

Ryan Park new interview:

"It's JP -- oh, without question," he said. "That was the hard part. That's where I felt like I got a little bit of the short end of the stick because JP had two dates before I even had the one. But the truth is, she started feeling for JP so early that it was like, 'Gosh.' It was futile, but I wasn't gonna give up."

Now that he’s seen the show, he understands more why Ashley let him go — both times. He thinks both JP Rosenbaum and Ben Flajnik are great guys, but calls her connection with JP “extraordinary” and expects things to head in that direction on Monday’s finale.

[jjinkc]

A very fair and well-written post. Thanks, jjinkc!!

I just like everyone to be happy and since all parties that any of this concerned are happy and doing ok, we should be as well.

[Guest]

[quote="raekae"]Wow... there's a lot of debate going on in this thread. I usually lurk, and rarely post, but I have time to kill so I'll throw in my two cents

What happens at the FRC is a breakup. Breakups are hard. Breakups on national tv? Ridiculously hard. Lets be real with ourselves, when we've been broken up with, do we always react with the best grace and tact? Heck no! We're being dumped!

Now, lets look at Ben and Ashley. Ashley is dumping Ben. Ben thinks he's getting engaged, jumps the gun and proposes. He laid it all out on the line for this girl, and he did it on national television. Thats rough enough in itself! Granted, he probably should've thought about the other man in this strange scenario, but if it were me in this situation, the only way I could make it thru would be to not think about the other girl thats vying for my mans heart and affection.

I personally think the wan reacted is normal. Perfectly normal. We all process things differently, and this is how Ben initially processes. I don't think he needs to be bashed on at all. I also think that they way Ashley handled things was normal. Breakups are hard on both the dumper and dumpee. Why don't we all remember that these people are real life humans, just like you and me, and lets cut them some slack![/quote

I don't see anything wrong with Ben's reaction either, the F2 position is just a tough spot to be in. I wasn't there or privy to what went down, so I have no right to criticize anyone on their behavior. I don't know if I could be so gracious after pouring my heart out for weeks only to have it dumped. :Frown:

[Alanna]

Great post, JBF. My only suggestion is to listen again at the roller rink. IMO he doesn't say it sternly at all. Just more like sweet concern that she's going to fall and break her neck. He doesn't raise his voice or bark at her at all, he's almost whispering it, like "please, don't let her get hurt", when he says "please, be careful" ~ it's one of the sweetest parts of that date to me.

When I said "stern", I meant it in the best way of course.

Oh no... I took it the same way you did! It was a highlight for me... and she LOVED it!

... and he is the one that falls!

I loved this part too because Ashley loved it so much. She's going to be one loved and protected little cupcake and that's exactly what she wants and needs and it seems JP loves to take care of her, and she takes care of him back when he needs it too (CM). Works for me! :D

jj, awesome post!! ITA with you!

[Guest]

Ben is adorable and when he said JP is the "safe" choice didn't he mean it'd be less change for Ashley in geography and flexibility? Ben knows he's tied to the winery. Let's give him the benefit of the doubt instead of using the lack of maturity approach. However, I'm way older than him and part of me will never "mature" but would like to give away some of the parts of me that have! It does appear that JP and Ashley are a great couple whichs is fun.

I'm also "way older" than Ben, and I'm sure that's the reason I'm more uncomfortable than many viewers with Ben's video that was leaked. I'm not making a judgment here, just commenting on the generation thing. My daughter, who is much closer to Ben's age, thought the video was hilarious. So when I saw how swiftly ABC got that video "recalled", I wondered if they were thinking of viewers like me, and wanted to be sure no doors were closed on the possibility of Ben being the next bachelor.

I haven't been on the board much in the last few days and hadn';t heard about a leaked video??? Can I see it somewhere, or was there a discussion going on about it in another thread??? so curious

Apparently the video was posted on RS's blog, we also had it here, but ABC legal asked everyone who had the video posted to remove it from their blogs, forums. So it is no longer available for viewing.

Then my guess would be that ABC legal thought it was pretty gross, too.

I saw most of it. They just sing about a creme dream. Gross concept yes. Not flattering portrayal of Ben...not at all. Not surprised ABC felt that. Esp if he is being considered for next BACH.

[beader]

Ben sister is the one who applied for him, so he might not have watch the show so who knows and not a student of it. She sure took away his first proposal oh what a game!

anybody that goes on a realty dating show without first checking it out, is nuts!! if he got blindsided due to ignorance, that would be his fault.

I would imagine that Ben's sister, once she realized he might be on the show, clued him in as to exactly how it works. Also, the guys spent many, many hours together. I would imagine they all shared what they all knew about the show and its workings. It's nice he was able to focus on his relationship with Ashley, but he probably needs to learn that he needs to remove the blinders and look for the relationship a woman has with him.

As to the point of Ben's watching or not watching the show...if he really wanted to know what Ashley had with JP that she didn't have with him, maybe rather than asking Ashley to explain it on national TV, he should have watched the show. He could have learned what a real love connection looks like. I'm still not certain why he didn't see it during filming. But, as he himself said, he just blocked out everyone else (or something like that). Maybe someday he'll watch the show and learn from it. He has plenty of time and a lot of growing up to do--he'll get there though if the underlying good person most of us see is really there.

[sjcaligurl]

I agree with what you are saying JBF. Ashley is a very bright, sweet young lady, but after watching her in Brads season and in her own, I think she needs a lot of reassurance..she herself has said she has a lot of insecurities. I think JP gives her the reassurance and security she needs but also supports her ambition for her career. I was very impressed with Ashley's honesty with JP, being able to tell him everything that happened (Bentley, Ryan, etc) but also in how JP handled the situation, with understanding and not conviction, I think that's exactly what she needs, instead of "your a smart girl, you'll figure it out..

Here's another contrast. When JP comforted Ashley on their first date, she fell asleep resting on his chest. On Ben's and Ashley's FD, both of their favorite part was the ride back ... where Ben had is head in HER lap ... Ashley has been a key factor in Ben re-emerging from a sad, dark place. She's helped and comforted him a lot. I think Ben sees Ashley as more of an equal. JP has been of great comfort to Ashley. She certainly admires, respects and looks up to him. The only reason I won't give JP the upper hand in the relationship as the leader is because, while he's become a great protector and defender, he doesn't seem to be much control over anything else. She completely disarms him and with her being so assertively affectionate, I'm not sure that there is anything she wants that he wont let her have.

I cannot remember if it was said here or on another board, "he's going to be one of those husbands whose wife can do no wrong."

Now, I do wonder what little speed bumps they had while watching the show and if JP had any problems digesting some of her interactions with the other guys. I know DeAnna had to walk Jesse through each episode and Ali definitely had some explaining to do to Roberto about all of that Frank stuff. Ashley did a lot of kissing ... LOL!

[jjinkc]

jj, awesome post!! ITA with you!

Aww...thanks Alanna. That makes my night cuz I usually think that about what you have to say!

[Alanna]

I agree with what you are saying JBF. Ashley is a very bright, sweet young lady, but after watching her in Brads season and in her own, I think she needs a lot of reassurance..she herself has said she has a lot of insecurities. I think JP gives her the reassurance and security she needs but also supports her ambition for her career. I was very impressed with Ashley's honesty with JP, being able to tell him everything that happened (Bentley, Ryan, etc) but also in how JP handled the situation, with understanding and not conviction, I think that's exactly what she needs, instead of "your a smart girl, you'll figure it out..

Here's another contrast. When JP comforted Ashley on their first date, she fell asleep resting on his chest. On Ben's and Ashley's FD, both of their favorite part was the ride back ... where Ben had is head in HER lap ... Ashley has been a key factor in Ben re-emerging from a sad, dark place. She's helped and comforted him a lot. I think Ben sees Ashley as more of an equal. JP has been of great comfort to Ashley. She certainly admires, respects and looks up to him. The only reason I won't give JP the upper hand in the relationship as the leader is because, while he's become a great protector and defender, he doesn't seem to be much control over anything else. She completely disarms him and with her being so assertively affectionate, I'm not sure that there is anything she wants that he wont let her have.

I cannot remember if it was said here or on another board, "he's going to be one of those husbands whose wife can do no wrong."

Now, I do wonder what little speed bumps they had while watching the show and if JP had any problems digesting some of her interactions with the other guys. I know DeAnna had to walk Jesse through each episode and Ali definitely had some explaining to do to Roberto about all of that Frank stuff. Ashley did a lot of kissing ... LOL!

She also cuddled into his chest on their FD after he promised her it's not a competition. And ITA with the bold too, he may think he's "in charge," but he's completely whipped and just spends his time looking at her adoringly. HAHA.

BTW, I know you know I already think this, but your posts are so awesome! I'm catching up on this thread and LOLing at your description of the guys on BB and the ones from this season and why JP was F1. LOL. Too hilarious and well written!!

wave Aww...thanks Alanna. That makes my night cuz I usually think that about what you have to say!

You're so sweet! Thank you! :smooch:

[Pattycake92]

Here's another contrast. When JP comforted Ashley on their first date, she fell asleep resting on his chest. On Ben's and Ashley's FD, both of their favorite part was the ride back ... where Ben had is head in HER lap ... Ashley has been a key factor in Ben re-emerging from a sad, dark place. She's helped and comforted him a lot. I think Ben sees Ashley as more of an equal. JP has been of great comfort to Ashley. She certainly admires, respects and looks up to him. The only reason I won't give JP the upper hand in the relationship as the leader is because, while he's become a great protector and defender, he doesn't seem to be much control over anything else. She completely disarms him and with her being so assertively affectionate, I'm not sure that there is anything she wants that he wont let her have.

I cannot remember if it was said here or on another board, "he's going to be one of those husbands whose wife can do no wrong."

Now, I do wonder what little speed bumps they had while watching the show and if JP had any problems digesting some of her interactions with the other guys. I know DeAnna had to walk Jesse through each episode and Ali definitely had some explaining to do to Roberto about all of that Frank stuff. Ashley did a lot of kissing ... LOL!

I think you're right. She's got him wrapped around her pinkie :awesome:

Before Ashley:



After Ashley:

[Guest]

Wow... there's a lot of debate going on in this thread. I usually lurk, and rarely post, but I have time to kill so I'll throw in my two cents

What happens at the FRC is a breakup. Breakups are hard. Breakups on national tv? Ridiculously hard. Lets be real with ourselves, when we've been broken up with, do we always react with the best grace and tact? Heck no! We're being dumped!

Now, lets look at Ben and Ashley. Ashley is dumping Ben. Ben thinks he's getting engaged, jumps the gun and proposes. He laid it all out on the line for this girl, and he did it on national television. Thats rough enough in itself! Granted, he probably should've thought about the other man in this strange scenario, but if it were me in this situation, the only way I could make it thru would be to not think about the other girl thats vying for my mans heart and affection.

I personally think the way Ben reacted is normal. Perfectly normal. We all process things differently, and this is how Ben initially processes. I don't think he needs to be bashed on at all. I also think that they way Ashley handled things was normal. Breakups are hard on both the dumper and dumpee. Why don't we all remember that these people are real life humans, just like you and me, and lets cut them some slack!

Nicely stated!

[Admin]

I just love the look on his face in the blue shirt.

[Sponsored content]